Jessica

 

As Jessica walked home in the cold, holding her jacket as tight around her body as possible, she said a silent apology to the life growing inside of her: I’m so sorry, baby. I’ll get us somewhere warm and safe soon. I promise.

 

And tonight, she meant it. She was going to book a bus ticket to get out of town before the Gorge could be sold to that motherfucker who claimed to love her. She rushed inside her apartment, turning up the heat as soon as she entered before plopping down on her couch.

 

So, Tom had given up. She guessed that she shouldn’t have felt surprised, really. Tom had no dog in this fight. He was just a businessman trying to make money. It made sense that he’d given in to Gary’s demands. But it still hurt her, even though she saw it coming. She felt like the last little bit of protection she had in this world was about to ripped away.

 

No matter, she told herself, straightening up and pulling out her phone from the pocket of her jacket. She’d be out of here long before the Gorge was in Gary’s grubby little hands. But of course, when she tried to find a bus ticket to take her out of town, she discovered that her data was low, and she couldn’t access the Internet from her apartment. “Goddammit,” she muttered out loud, tempted to throw her phone across the room.

 

But before she could, a text message from Macie appeared on the screen. “Hey, honey. I know you’re mad at me, but can we talk? Just for a few minutes. I know you’re busy.”

 

For some reason the text made Jessica’s heart sink low in her chest. She just pictured Macie’s sad, earnest face as she typed it. Macie had always wanted the best for her, always looked after her. At least she had in the past. Jessica didn’t know what was going on now, since she hadn’t seen Macie since the night Gary showed up at her apartment. Usually she saw her every other day, at the bare minimum. Maybe they were just drifting apart naturally. Or maybe Gary had warned Macie not to get close to her, to make Jessica feel as alone as possible. Jessica wouldn’t put it past him.

 

On one hand, Jessica was tempted to ignore Macie’s text, to skip town without even acknowledging her former best friend. That would show her, right? That would prove a point. You don’t fucking abandon your friends. Ever.

 

But on the other hand, it crushed Jessica to think that she might not ever see Macie again. Macie couldn’t come with her; that was for sure. She was married to the town, to the Nightwalkers. In escaping Gary, Jessica would be leaving behind the one person left that she loved from her days at Sully’s. That still meant something, despite how angry and hurt she felt about Macie’s recent actions.

 

She unlocked her phone again and opened up her contacts page, clicking on Macie’s name to call her. The call rang three times before Macie picked up. “Hello?!” she asked, sounding a little frantic, like she was afraid Jessica was going to hang up on her if she didn’t talk quickly enough.

 

“Hey,” Jessica said, sighing deeply. Her heart pounded against her ribcage, almost hurting her with its insistent rhythm. She didn’t know if she was nervous because of what she was about to tell Macie, or if she thought Macie might tattle on her to Gary. Either way, she knew she was still going to tell her the truth. Macie was still her best friend, for better or for worse. There was no denying that. “I have something to tell you.”

 

“Okay, honey, I’m here for you,” Macie said, sounding a little calmer but still not as casual or confident as she usually would. Jessica was a little curious, wondering what was going on at the other end of the phone, but she decided not to push the issue. She had enough to worry about on her own.

 

“Um, so I’m pregnant,” Jessica said. It was the first time she’d said those words out loud. They landed hard and heavy within her own ears. She could only imagine what they felt like to Macie, who had no warning.

 

“Fuck!” Macie said on the other end of the phone. “Jesus Christ!”

 

“Yep,” Jessica said. “That was my reaction, too.”

 

“What are you going to do?” Macie said. “It’s Pax’s, right?”

 

“Yeah, it’s definitely Pax’s,” Jessica replied, feeling a little grateful that it wasn’t Gary’s. “And I’m leaving town.”

 

“Wh-what?” Macie said, her tongue tripping over the word.

 

“I’m leaving,” Jessica repeated, saying the words slowly so that Macie had time to digest them. “I wasn’t going to tell you, but then I figured you deserved to know ahead of time. I’ve got to leave. Soon.”

 

“How soon?” Macie said, her voice coming out higher-pitched, fear evident in her tone.

 

“I don’t know. Sometime over the next couple of days, as soon as I get Internet access again or have time to walk to the bus station,” Jessica explained. “The Gorge is going to be Gary’s soon, and I can’t be around when that happens.”

 

Macie exhaled shakily on the other end. “Jessica. Please think about this.”

 

“I have,” Jessica said quickly. “I’ve thought about this, and this is the best move for me and my child. And you can’t tell anyone. At least, not until after I’m gone.”

 

“Jessica, please,” Macie said, outright begging now. “Please, just listen to me. Wait a little bit longer, okay? Just a little bit longer and things will be better, all right? I promise.”

 

Jessica scoffed, shaking her head. “How can you say that to me? Where the fuck have you even been, the last couple of weeks? I haven’t seen you at all. How can you just text me out of nowhere and act like everything’s going to be okay when you haven’t been there for me?”

 

“Jessica, I’ve had to deal with some stuff, okay, stuff I can’t talk about right now, but I promise—”

 

“No, no, save it,” Jessica said, feeling fully incensed now. “Unless you can go back in time and not abandon me to Gary, who could have fucking raped me for all you know, you can just save it. I spent years thinking that you were my only ally, you know that? You were the only person I trusted. But you’re just like everybody else, wanting to keep me here so Gary can have me. Well, it’s not going to happen. He’s not going to get me or my baby. Ever.”

 

“Jessica—” Macie started to say, but Jessica hung up before she could get any more words out.

 

Jessica felt hot, angry tears fill her eyes as soon as she put the phone down, but she hurriedly wiped at her eyes, refusing to let herself cry over a fake friendship that was never what she thought it was. Jessica had nobody in her life that she could trust. But that was fine. She would survive on her own, just like she always had. Jessica touched her lower stomach, rubbing over the skin, right over where her baby was growing. At least now Jessica had a reason to keep fighting for her life, even if she had to do it all alone.