Pax

 

Pax shivered a bit in the cold as he waited for Arnold, his heart thumping painfully in his throat as the seconds ticked by without any report or update. What if the whole thing had gone wrong? What if Gary got suspicious or someone from the club ratted on Arnold? What if the cops turned on him and arrested them both? What if Arnold was dead in a ditch right now, and Gary was on his way back to Jessica’s place, ready to exact revenge?

 

A minute later, he heard the roar of a motorcycle’s engine from one street over, and his heart froze in his chest, his body stuck in place, petrified by fear that filled every last one of his veins up to the brim. Please be Arnold, he prayed silently, his eyes flicking in every direction to look for a bike. Please be Arnold, please be Arnold, dear God, I know I haven’t prayed in forever, and I don’t even know if you’re listening to me, if you’re even real, but please, if you are, if you haven’t abandoned me, please, please, let it be Arnold, please, God, please.

 

The next moment, he received an answer to his prayer as Arnold rode into the parking lot, sailing across the pavement until he came to an abrupt stop directly in front of Pax. Arnold removed his helmet and grinned at his new friend, clapping him on the shoulder. “Come on, get on the back of my bike. We’ve got a victory lap to do.”

 

Pax felt relief crash over him, and not in a gentle way. His knees gave out for a moment, sending him sinking down to the sidewalk underneath his feet. He swallowed numerous times, willing his throat not to close up from sheer shock. It worked. Their stupid, ridiculous, crazy plan actually worked! It helped that Gary had a total meltdown earlier at Sully’s, pissing off the members of the club that had actually been loyal to him. But even after Pax got word that afternoon that half of the MC was now ready to turn Gary over to the police, he’d been consumed by doubt. Macie was waiting in the bushes over by Jessica’s place, ready to strike with her own weapon if Gary showed up and tried to get violent, but Pax had still spent the last several hours consumed in worry, his stomach lining falling apart inside of him as he imagined every possible scenario happening. But the doom that he had been expecting didn’t crash down upon them. Gary was gone, for good. They were safe. And now he got to be with Jessica, really be with her, without fear of retaliation.

 

He felt so happy for a second that he thought he might actually die. His heart just felt so full; he didn’t know if he was equipped to feel this much emotion at once. But the moment passed, and Arnold reached down to offer him his hand and pull him to his feet. “Thanks,” Pax muttered as he got up, brushing off his pants before walking around to climb onto the back of Arnold’s bike. “Let’s go.”

 

“You know,” Arnold said loudly as he started up the engine again. “I think you might have some potential, Pax.”

 

“Potential for what?” Pax asked, even though he wasn’t really all that curious. He was entirely consumed with the need to see Jessica, to push her body against his, to protect her, to assure himself that nothing bad would ever happen to her again.

 

“The MC,” Arnold shouted back as they began to ride down the road in the direction of Jessica’s apartment. “We’ve got an opening for a couple junior members, and I really think you might like it. You know, if you’re interested in gaining a few brothers. No pressure.”

 

“Thanks for the offer,” Pax said, “but I think I might need to sleep for like twelve years before I consider doing anything ever again.”

 

Arnold laughed, nodding even though Pax could only see the back of his head from his place on the bike. “Fair enough. Offer still stands, though. Think about it.”

 

A few minutes later, they rolled to a stop in front of Jessica’s apartment, hopping off the bike and rushing to the door. Jessica was waiting there, flinging the door open before Pax could even knock and colliding into his body, crushing him into the tightest hug he’d ever felt in his life. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you? Are you all right?” Pax whispered into her ear, holding her back as closely as he could, even though he was still halfway outside, his body growing numb from the cold.

 

“I’m fine, I’m fine, everything’s fine,” Jessica whispered back before grabbing the back of Pax’s head and guiding him into a kiss. “Jesus Christ,” she muttered in between soft kisses that only grew more and more intense as Pax reciprocated. “I thought I’d never get to see you again.”

 

“I’m here,” Pax said, grabbing the sides of Jessica’s head to hold her in place as he kissed her more deeply, pulling on her lips like he could take her into his body, to protect her and shield her from harm for the rest of their days. “I swear, I swear, I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going anywhere.”

 

“Okay, lovebirds, how about just going into the house?” Arnold said behind Pax, lightly pushing on his back until the couple shuffled inside, letting Arnold come in after them.

 

“Oh, leave them alone. They deserve a chance to be sappy and disgusting,” Macie said from her place against the opposite wall, where she was gathering items off the floor. Pax deduced that Gary must have made a mess in here earlier, tearing up Jessica’s apartment when she told him the truth.

 

Jessica finally pulled away from Pax long enough to look over his shoulder, addressing Arnold. “So you saw it? He’s gone? He’s really, really gone?”

 

“Yep,” Arnold said cheerily, walking over to the kitchen to grab something out of the refrigerator. “Let’s see here, the champagne is in the back, and the apple juice is right next to it… Here we go, guys! Let’s have a toast!”

 

“To what?” Pax asked, wrapping his broad hand around the back of Jessica’s head, tucking her under his chin. He didn’t know that he was capable of ever letting her out of his grasp again. For her own part, Jessica didn’t seem to mind, nuzzling into his neck and clutching hard onto the front of his shirt.

 

“To freedom!” Macie said, literally jumping over to join Arnold in the kitchen, opening up some cabinets to grab some glasses. “For all of us now. The club is ours.”

 

“So you’re the head of the MC now, Arnold?” Jessica asked, her fingers pulling insistently at the fabric of Pax’s shirt, like she needed to remind himself that he was really there next to her. “The other men just rolled over for you?”

 

“They were happy to be rid of him,” Arnold said. “Everybody was just too scared to talk to each other about it, but now we can all admit that we hated that motherfucker, at least for the last couple of years. It’s done now. Macie and me are going to take the club into a new direction. But Gary did have one good idea. The Gorge. We’re going to buy it from your boss, just to have some legitimate money coming into the business. But we’d love it if you two stayed on and managed the business for us.”

 

“Enough business talk! Apple juice for the pregnant lady, champagne for the rest of us,” Macie said with a laugh, pouring out the drinks before distributing them to her friends. “Okay, okay, what should we toast to? Jessica, do the honors.”

 

“Um…” Jessica hesitated, staring up at Pax for a second before finally smiling. “To new beginnings.” She grabbed the juice from Macie before offering it forward, confidently toasting her new life.

 

“To conquered foes,” Arnold said, putting his drink forward to tap it lightly against Jessica’s.

 

“To power that’s earned,” Macie said, gently colliding her glass against the two other cups.

 

Pax was quiet a moment, staring down at his drink before he finally landed on the courage to say what he wanted. He cleared his throat and stared down into Jessica’s eyes as he said, “To love,” offering his drink forward to toast with the others.

 

“To love!” the other three called out before pulling their glasses back to drink.

 

For the first time in Pax’s life, he felt something other than fear and emptiness. Together with his new friends and his new lover, he felt something as terrifying as it was comforting: happiness. He could only pray for the strength not to ruin it, to treasure it as much as it deserved to be treasured, but looking down at Jessica’s smiling face, he knew somehow that this time, he wasn’t going to fail. Together, they’d be strong. More importantly, they’d be safe. They’d be happy. They would be a family.

 

THE END