CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Ryanne
I’ve been a complete and utter mess all day. My heart has a huge gaping hole that won’t be filled until Hannah is home again. I’m not used to being away from her like this. The only time we are ever apart is when I’m working. I have no friends, no life outside of her, and I miss her dearly. I know she and Justice more than deserve this time together but it doesn’t stop it from hurting.
I appreciate the couple pictures he has sent my way but am surprised he even thought of me. Things have been even more strained between us since the other night when I humped his leg like a dog in heat…
Humiliation burns inside of me at the memory. I still can’t believe I did that but I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, my hormones have always overtaken my common sense when it comes to that man.
I’ve tried to keep busy by cleaning the house, top to bottom. I baked Hannah’s favorite cookies and now have her favorite dish in the oven. Between all of that, I’ve been wandering over to the large window in the living room for the last two hours, looking for any sign of them. When I finally catch sight of Justice’s black truck turning onto the driveway, I dart back into the kitchen before they can see me, almost tripping over my own two feet.
Picking up the knife from the counter, I begin chopping the vegetables for the salad I’m preparing.
The door opens moments later and Hannah’s voice fills the air. “Mama, we’re home!”
“I’m in the kitchen,” I call out, trying to slow my breathing so I don’t give myself away.
“Oh, we saw you in the window so I thought you was in the living room.”
Shit!
My cheeks warm in embarrassment for getting busted. I turn around just in time to see Hannah running into the kitchen with Justice trailing behind her. I drop the knife on the counter, kneeling down to take her in my arms. She barrels straight into them. Hugging her close, I breathe her in, my heart complete once again.
“Did you have a good time?” I ask, even though the answer is evident in her smile.
“The best! But I sure did miss ya.”
“I missed you, too,” I confess, trying my damnedest to keep my emotions in check when I really want to blubber like a baby and never let her go again.
My gaze meets Justice’s over her head, that ever-present pull passing between us. Or maybe it’s just me and my traitorous hormones again.
“Guess what?” Hannah says, lifting her head from my shoulder.
“What?”
“We bought you a present.”
“You did?” I ask, surprised by the thoughtful gesture.
“Yep, here ya go.” She hands me a plastic bag with the zoo’s logo on it.
My heart warms as I take it from her. Reaching in, I pull out a bangle bracelet that has a single charm on it. Her birthstone.
“Daddy bought me one too, we have matching ones.”
“They’re beautiful.” I look up at Justice, touched that he would do this. It gives me a little hope that maybe, just maybe, he won’t hate me forever. “Thank you,” I say on a whisper.
“You’re welcome.”
I slip it onto my wrist, in love with what it represents.
“Can Daddy stay for supper? I’m not ready to say goodbye to him.”
My eyes meet Justice’s again and I wait for some kind of reaction to the request but he gives nothing away. “He’s welcome to stay if he wants but he might already have plans.”
“I’ll stay,” he cuts in, surprising me once more.
“Yay!” Hannah’s cheer fills the air, her happiness filling my heart.
“Go on and wash up for dinner now,” I say, tapping her on the behind. “I made your favorite.”
“Lasagna?”
“You got it.”
“Yes!” She fist pumps the air. “I’ll be right back. Don’t move,” she orders, shaking her finger at Justice before running out of the kitchen.
Tension fills the room once we’re left alone. Clearing my throat, I stand and start cutting the vegetables again. “Sounds like you guys had a good day.”
“We did.”
I nod when he offers nothing else and continue to slice the cucumber, the sound of my knife on the cutting board filling the awkward silence. “Thanks for the pictures.”
When he doesn’t respond, I look over my shoulder and find him watching me, his intense eyes burning every inch of my skin. Our kiss from the other night emerges, my lips tingling with its memory. By the heat in his gaze, I have no doubt he’s thinking about it, too.
“I’m baaack,” Hannah sings, breaking our connection as she skips into the kitchen. “I brought down the book I was tellin’ you about that Mama reads to me at night. Wanna look at it?”
“Sure,” he replies.
She grabs his hand and leads him over to the table. When he takes a seat, she hops up on his lap, looking comfortable and like she completely belongs there. The sight of them has warmth invading my chest. It’s obvious they broke through more barriers today, and I couldn’t be happier for them.
I turn back to my task at hand, contentment settling over me as I listen to them talk.
“Maybe tonight you can tuck me in,” she says.
“Is that what you want?”
“Very much.”
“Then I will.”
I smile at the way she has him wrapped around her little finger. If anyone has the ability to rope Justice Creed in, it’s definitely Hannah. She has a way about her; a kindness and innocence that makes it very hard to not give her the world.
“Maybe one time you could even sleep over.”
As soon the suggestion leaves her mouth my blade misses the vegetable and slices my finger.
“Shit!” I drop the knife and reach for a dishtowel, wrapping it around the stinging wound.
“Mama, are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” I lie, gritting the response between clenched teeth.
Justice is next to me in an instant. “Let me see,” he says, grabbing my wrist.
“I’m good.”
“Let me see, Ryanne.” His bossy tone brooks no argument.
I give him my hand. He pulls me toward the sink and opens the towel. The air stings the open wound further and the sight of blood has my stomach twisting.
Justice flips on the cold water and stands behind me, holding my bloody finger under the faucet. His erection pressing into me is undeniable and sets my body ablaze. My pain fades and I feel nothing else but the heat from his body and pent-up desire that I still harbor for this man.
“Feeling better?” he murmurs, his warm breath tickling my ear.
I nod, unable to speak.
He turns my finger over, inspecting the wound. “You shouldn’t need stitches.”
“’Kay,” I mumble like an idiot, the one word coming out ridiculously breathless.
His arrogant chuckle rumbles in his chest and vibrates against my back. I’m about to toss him a glare over my shoulder until the energy between us suddenly shifts and I feel his body turn rigid.
My face turns toward his and I find him staring down at my chest. Before I can even contemplate what the problem is, he reaches inside of my tank top and pulls out my necklace. The pearl one he bought me for my eighteenth birthday.
He examines the necklace then my face, searching for answers.
I lick my sudden dry lips, my pulse hammering as my mind scrambles with an excuse as to why I still wear it but my words fall flat, his intense eyes robbing me of speech.
A loud piercing sound penetrates the kitchen, knocking us from the heavy moment. Flinching, I cover my ears and it doesn’t take me long to realize it’s the fire alarm. With a gasp, I spin around and find black smoke pouring out of my oven.
“Oh no!” I push from Justice and run to open the door, waving the towel in front of my face while Hannah coughs and sputters, coming up behind me. “Stay back.”
Justice deals with the fire alarm while I remove the now burnt dinner and set it on the stove. My shoulders deflate as I accept defeat. There’s no way I’ll be able to salvage this. The damage is irreparable.
Turning around, I find Justice and Hannah watching me. Hannah looks back at me with sympathy while Justice is the complete opposite. He looks more amused than anything.
“Anyone feel like ordering pizza?” I ask.
“I like pizza,” Hannah says, then looks up at Justice. “How about you?”
“Works for me.”
After dumping the ruined lasagna, I call for delivery then grab a Band-Aid for my finger while Justice and Hannah continue their visit.
Despite the previous disaster we end up having a really great dinner. While we eat the pizza, which Justice ended up paying for, Hannah fills me in on their day, telling me all about the animals they saw. We share a few laughs and Justice even cracks a smile from time to time. It’s light, easy and…beautiful. Exactly what I’ve longed for all these years.
Before long, it’s past time for Hannah to go to bed. Justice takes her upstairs and tucks her in like he promised to do. I remain in the kitchen, giving them more time together and clean up the dishes.
Rubber gloves cover my hands as I ruthlessly scrub the casserole dish that’s caked with burnt cheese, my thoughts drifting to the perfect night we had despite my ruined dinner. If only our circumstances had been different this is what we could have had from day one.
The thought saddens me.
I know the moment Justice returns to the kitchen. I don’t hear him but I feel him, awareness seeping into my bones.
“She’s already asleep,” he tells me, his deep voice dancing along my senses.
Smiling, I turn around to face him, brushing a piece of stray hair out of my face with my arm. “Guess you wore her out.”
He says nothing, his intense eyes pinning me in place. He does this on purpose, knowing it affects me. It pisses me off and turns me on at the same time; it’s the latter that has me nervous.
“Stop,” I whisper.
He starts forward, his long, determined strides eating up the distance between us. My heart jackhammers, pulse beating ferociously as he cages me in, his arms planting on either side of my hips.
“Stop what, Ryanne?”
“You know what,” I tell him, refusing to play this game. I can’t, my heart won’t survive it a second time.
He ignores me and trails his finger from my collarbone down to the neckline of my tank top, creating goose bumps across my fevered flesh.
Reaching inside my shirt, he pulls out the necklace. “Tell me why you wear it,” he demands. “And don’t lie to me.”
“Because it’s special to me.”
“Why?” he asks again, wanting a better answer.
I decide I have nothing to lose by being completely honest. “Because it’s the first gift anyone ever gave to me out of kindness and not expectation.”
My parents never gave me presents and if they did it was in front of company for show, not because they cared.
“It also represents that night between us,” I add quietly. “The night you gave me our daughter.”
There’s a shift in his eyes, a flicker of something that shows some sort of emotion. It’s all I get before he dips his face next to mine, his nose skimming my cheek. My lungs seize in my chest, a shiver rippling through me at the intimate moment.
His lips press against my temple. It’s the faintest touch but it weaves its way into the very depths of my soul. My eyes close as I fight the urge to pull him closer and succumb to this longing I have burning in my blood.
“I’ll be back tomorrow.” Without another word he walks away, leaving my body and heart wanting so much more.