I’d sensed Ben’s frustration mounting for days. He was like a see-saw, popping up and down between contentedness and resentment. Clearly, he enjoyed his time with Georgie and appreciated the progress she was making with the psychologist. But then he would catch sight of the Marian family, Griff especially, and be lost again to his bubbling anger.

As soon as we’d returned to the cabin and sent Georgie off, Ben had disappeared into the bathroom and I’d picked up my phone to make some arrangements.

The man was going stir-crazy, and I didn’t blame him. I wasn’t used to being still, biding my time while other people did the work behind the scenes. Thankfully, Ronan had given the go-ahead for me to take Ben away from the vineyard for a few hours and had helped coordinate once I’d come up with an idea for what I wanted to do.

When Georgie returned from her visit to see the new kittens, Jamie and Ronan arrived to invite her for pizza and movies at their cabin. I shuddered when they even offered for her to bring Princess Kitty along in her travel box… purse… thing.

I hadn’t actually expected Georgie to want to go, but with a little bit of coaxing from me and Ben that we were just a phone call away, she’d shyly agreed.

Ben hugged her and reminded her about using her manners before seeing her off with my boss and his sidekick. Once they were gone, I noticed him bite his lip.

“She’ll be fine,” I said.

“I know. I do. It’s just…”

“Did you know I once won a hundred tickets playing Skee-Ball at a Chuck E. Cheese’s?” I said, trying to distract him from his worrying.

He looked up at me with pity. “A hundred? Are you trying to impress me?”

I opened the cabin door and gestured for him to precede me to the car. “Is it working?”

“Dude, try four hundred and fifty. And I’ve only been to Chuck E. Cheese’s once in my life.”

I snorted. “Oh my god. You’re such a geek.”

His eyes flashed in the afternoon spring sunshine. “You don’t even know the half of it. If you saw me at a Captain Fantastic pinball machine with a nice roll of quarters, you’d come in your pants.”

If there is a god, there will be one where we’re going.

I ignored my body’s need to grab Ben and drag him back to the cabin and the bed we had yet to actually sleep together in. Ben always started out on the mattress, but by morning, both he and Georgie would be asleep next to me on the floor. I really needed to get over my aversion to beds because it couldn’t be comfortable for either of them to sleep on the hard floor.

“Hop in the car, Captain Fantastic,” I said with a chuckle.

At first, it was utterly silent in the car as we drove out of the vineyard gates, past the two men keeping watch, and onto the quiet country lane toward the town of Napa. But as we got farther and farther away from the vineyard, I could feel the tension falling away from Ben. His face was turned toward his window as he watched rows and rows of vines fly past. I wondered what he was thinking about. Was his mind back on Georgie at Ronan’s place? Was he, like me, wondering just how long we could continue to hide away from our real lives at the Alexander Vineyard? Or was he maybe daydreaming of something more relaxing like being a regular tourist going for a wine tasting or meeting a handsome man on a date at a nearby restaurant? It suddenly occurred to me that that was something he’d never be able to have with me since there was always the possibility of me being recognized. It didn’t happen all the time, but when someone did realize I was the son of the great Everett Shaw, the questions about my father would quickly follow.

The idea of Ben with someone else—touching someone else, laughing with someone else—had me seeing red.

“Why are you gripping the wheel so tightly?” Ben asked with a grin.

“What? I’m not,” I said, releasing my clutch on the wheel and rubbing a cheek with one of my hands.

“Where are we going? Out to eat? It’s kind of early.”

“No. We’re going to a funky little place I discovered on a Google search. It’s a surprise.”

Ben studied me for a minute before turning away again to stare out the window. It was a few minutes before he spoke again.

“Is this… what are we… I mean, is this like… a date?”

He glanced at me before flicking his eyes away.

“Never mind,” he muttered. “Forget I asked. That was stupid.”

The insecurity in his voice tugged at my heart and I wondered who the asshole was who’d made him feel like he wasn’t good enough. Maybe there’d been a lot of assholes.

By the time I pulled onto a side road and put the car in park, he was looking at me with a questioning expression on his face. I sent a quick text message for the guys trailing us to let them know we were pulling over but that everything was okay. I reached out to cup Ben’s cheek with one hand and grabbed his uninjured hand with my other one.

“Would that be okay with you?” I asked.

His green eyes searched mine as if he wondered whether or not I was joking. I brushed a thumb against the side of his cheek and ached to reassure him.

“Because I’d like for it to be a date,” I continued. “But only if that’s what you want.”

Ben’s face finally softened and the corner of his lips turned up. “Yeah. I’d like that too.”

I leaned in to brush a kiss across his lips, taking my time with it but not delving inside. His little breaths against my neck raised goosebumps there, and I took a minute to enjoy the taste and scent of him before sitting back and continuing our journey.

The rest of the way into town was less quiet. Ben told me about having been born in Bakersfield, California, but only living there a short time before his adoptive parents moved to Georgia.

“It’s greener here than I expected. I remember Bakersfield was really brown,” he said. “We lived near a small airport, and my dad used to take me outside at night sometimes when we heard a plane come in so I could see the lights.” He laughed softly. “It’s funny the things you remember. My mom had a giant clear glass jar on the kitchen counter that she put cereal in. Except… she didn’t pour it in the jar. She took the plastic bag of cereal out of the cereal box, threw the box away, and put the bag inside the clear jar. Isn’t that weird? Why in the world did she do that? It was ugly.”

I didn’t answer him because I knew he wasn’t really asking me the question. Besides, I was content just to listen to his memories.

By the time we pulled into the small parking lot, Ben was noticeably relaxed. He saw the sign on the building and turned to me in surprise.

“Al’s Arcade?”

“Surprise,” I said. “It’s ours for a couple of hours.”

“What? What do you mean it’s ours?” His eyes gleamed with excitement, making him look even younger than he was.

“Ronan rented it out so we didn’t have to worry about any other customers,” I explained, waiting until Marek and Dex had parked their car before walking around to let Ben out.

He was like a kid in a candy store. The minute we entered the worn-out arcade building, he froze as if not having any idea where to begin.

“What’s first, Captain Fantastic?”

He turned to me with stars in his eyes. “You think they have pinball?”

I laughed and pointed to the far wall on our right where a row of vintage pinball machines stood in a tidy line of flashing lights and colors. The old man who’d welcomed us winked and told us to have fun before disappearing into a small office behind the snack counter.

Ben wandered over to the pinball machines. “They don’t have Captain Fantastic, but look! They have Creature from the Black Lagoon. It has a holographic creature and these super cool ramps.”

And with that, he was lost to the games. Watching him work the buttons and paddles, despite his cast, was truly a sight. He hadn’t been joking when he’d said he was well-versed in old arcade games. I could tell from his childlike excitement that just being there with the sights and sounds, not to mention probably the scent of old popcorn and cheap carpet, must have brought back comforting memories of all the times he’d spent playing games with his dad.

It didn’t take him long to encourage me onto the machine next to his. It was one modeled off the old cartoon, The Jetsons. It wasn’t quite as flashy and complex as the one Ben played, which meant I was able to steal glances at him from time to time. The slim muscles of his forearm moved beneath his skin and his little butt stuck out when he leaned in to yell something at the game. Watching him enjoy himself was a gift, and I was beyond grateful to Ronan for not only accepting my request but helping to make it as safe as possible.

When he’d had his fill of the Creature, he watched me finish getting crushed by The Jetsons.

“Skee-Ball time?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

“You’re on. Show me what you got, tough guy.”

As we made our way through the maze of games to the wall with the Skee-Ball games on it, Ben grabbed my hand. “Thank you,” he said. “I knew I needed to get out of there for a little while, but this… this is like fifty thousand times more amazing than anything I could have dreamed up.”

“I’m glad. I have to admit to enjoying watching you pound the hell out of that thing,” I teased.

Ben’s eyes darkened, and I realized how that must have sounded.

“If you liked that, wait till you see how well I handle balls,” he said before flouncing off and leaning over to place a token in the slot. Ben made a big production of wriggling his ass as he bent over.

“I’m not so easily distracted,” I called out with a laugh. It was clearly a lie.

“Wanna bet?” he asked before standing up, adjusting his package, and then palming two of the smooth brown balls in one hand, rolling them around like Chinese medicine balls.

I gulped.

Ben’s face was all innocence as he turned to challenge me. “Think you can get it in the little hole?”

My face was probably the color of the red scoreboard, and my hands began to sweat. I pulled myself together. I was eleven years older than this kid. It was time to turn the tables on him.

I hefted a ball into my hand and examined it. “I’ve never been able to fit this big thing in such a small hole before, but I’m willing to practice all afternoon if that’s what it takes. I’ve got to warn you though, I might not have good aim at first. I’m likely to go into your hole several times until I get the hang of it,” I said, pointing from my lane to his.

“You’ll be lucky if your ball doesn’t follow your mind right into the gutter, Mr. Kitty. Game on.”

Of course he was right. My ball went into the gutter over and over while his hit the big circle, the medium circle, and finally the tiny fifty-point circle. I could tell his childhood strategies were coming back to him the more he played, whereas I’d only ever played once when an old army buddy had invited me to join his son’s birthday party at a game place. My childhood in the political spotlight hadn’t exactly been one that included hours in an arcade.

“You hungry?” I asked when we ran out of tokens.

“Starving. Can we get something from the snack bar here? I’m not really dressed for any of those fancy Napa restaurants we passed.”

“Sure.” I led him over to the concessions counter and called out for the man in the back. While I was relieved Ben hadn’t wanted to go to a fancy restaurant, I wondered if it had truly been because of his clothes or if it was possible he’d known what a security challenge we’d have at one of those places.

The man, who was the same guy who’d let us in, made quick work of taking our order of pizza and sodas and I was once again grateful to Ronan for however he’d managed to convince the guy not to tell the press President Shaw’s kid was in his arcade.

With another guy, no less.

I suspected Ronan’s deep pockets probably had something to do with it. Up until recently, I hadn’t often been recognized, but after my father had come out, I’d done several interviews with reporters to tell the world I fully supported my dad. My own sexuality had come up many times, but I’d refused to answer those questions. Luckily, the press had lost enough interest in me that I could walk down the street without necessarily being recognized.

Ben and I found a seat at a nearby table, and the first thing out of Ben’s mouth was some smack talk about what a piss-poor shot I must be considering my terrible Skee-Ball aim.

“I’m pretty sure firearms are different from Skee-Balls,” I said. “I don’t usually roll a bullet toward an insurgent.”

We continued to tease and flirt until our pizza came. The man quickly made himself scarce as Ben began practically inhaling his food. It was good to see Ben with a hearty appetite now that his body had gone a far way toward being fully healed. He only needed to spend another week or two in the cast before having it switched out for a removable brace.

“We were talking about my parents earlier, and it occurred to me I don’t really know anything personal about yours other than what everyone else knows from the media. And that usually focuses on your dad. What’s your mom like?” Ben asked out of the blue.

“Dead,” I blurted without thinking. I felt his eyes on me and didn’t need to look to know I’d shocked him.

“I’m sorry,” Ben said softly after a beat. “I didn’t know… I don’t really follow the news and… god, Reese, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” I murmured.

“Reese,” Ben responded, his voice knowing.

“She killed herself a couple years ago. I got there too late to save her.”

“You said she lied to you about telling your dad you were gay,” Ben prodded gently.

I nodded. “She told me it would ruin his campaign for president. She said he knew, but he didn’t. I told him last fall.” I sucked in a breath. “My mom, she was really needy after she and my dad got divorced. I… I thought it was because my dad had cheated on her and she’d really loved him, you know? But the truth was that she’d been in love with another man long before she’d even met my father and he was the one she wanted to be with all along. She killed herself because she wanted to be with him, not because of my dad. But I blamed him for it. I think part of me knew she wasn’t being honest about what had happened, but I didn’t want to accept it.”

Ben nodded but didn’t say anything. I’d lost what remained of my appetite so I reached for a napkin and began wiping off my fingers. My stomach felt like it was in knots as I thought about my mother and all the times she’d lied to me.

“What?” Ben asked, his voice gentle.

“It’s like my whole life was a lie,” I admitted. “I was trying so hard to be something for my father, then for her after they split up. Then in the military I had to be someone else and it was like…”

“Like what?”

The way Ben asked the question had me looking up from my hands which were clean enough but still felt strangely dirty.

“Like I was always looking for something… like I was always looking for…”

“You,” Ben supplied when I didn’t know how to continue. He reached out to close his fingers around my restless ones. “It was like you were always looking for you.”

“Yeah,” I acknowledged.

Ben began toying with my fingers, which both soothed me and got me worked up at the same time. My dick responded accordingly.

“Ben—”

“We should go,” Ben blurted. “We should go now.” His eyes were bright and his cheeks were flushed.

So I wasn’t the only one feeling like I was one big ball of sexual frustration.

I held onto his hand as I practically dragged him from his seat. I managed to catch him around the waist before his body hit mine, saving his arm from being jostled between us. But Ben seemed unconcerned about the injury because he was in my space a second later. He curled the fingers from his uninjured arm around the back of my neck and pulled me down to him, presumably for a kiss. I happily went. Right before our mouths met, Ben whispered, “Reese?”

“Yeah?” I breathed against his perfect lips.

“Drive home real fast, okay?”

I barely managed a nod.

My lips were just ghosting over his when I heard someone say, “Holy shit, it’s true!”

Ben and I jumped apart, and I quickly pulled him behind me. He let out a little yelp of pain because I inadvertently grabbed his injured arm.

“Reid, get back here!” someone else yelled at the same time I turned to see a strange man behind the concessions counter. He whipped his phone out and aimed it in our direction as the older man came tearing through the swing door. “Reid, I told you not to come up here or we may not get the cash!”

“The president’s kid is dry-humping another guy!” the kid, Reid, said with a grin. “Do you know how much we can sell that story for, Pops?”

I inwardly cursed as I began striding toward the guy. But Ben grabbed my hand. “Reese, don’t,” he said softly.

“I’m sorry, sir,” the older guy said as he tried to grab his kid’s phone. “He was supposed to stay in back,” he muttered as he motioned to the swing door behind him that presumably led to the kitchen.

Rabid anger went through me at once again having lost what should have been a private moment to the outside world. But I knew I couldn’t do shit about it.

Just like I’d never been able to do anything about it when I’d been a kid.

So I did what I’d always been forced to do.

I walked away and pretended none of it mattered.

“Let’s go,” I said to Ben as I turned and urged him toward the front door.

“Reese,” he began to say, but I cut him off with an impatient wave.

“Just let it go, Ben. Why the hell did I ever think this would work?” I snapped as regret and loss seared through me like acid. “I should have known better.”