Chapter 27

Mayhem

 

How do we end up where we are? What kind of fucked-up world would want us to feel pain the way we do?

I lie on the soft bed with my eyes closed, her scent filling my nose. I don’t know how we got back to the hotel last night, but here we are. I woke up early this morning. Not wanting to wake Tay, I didn’t move. Her mouth is slightly parted, her shallow breaths sneaking through her lips. She’s beyond gorgeous. This woman is amazing, yet I can’t seem to get that through my fucked-up head. Do I want her? Fuck yeah, I do. More than I should for not knowing much about her. But damn, she draws you in with her beauty. Then she keeps you there with her mind.

No one has ever talked to me the way she did last night. Partially because I would have put a bullet between their eyes if they had. Tay is different, though. She hasn’t been tarnished by the outside world or the feelings that go with it. Sure, she had a rough go with her dad but she grew up sheltered by the school that she was sent away to in Rome. I checked into. I know what it was like. She was basically a fucking nun walking around that place.

The urge to run my fingers through her hair, to touch her, to know that she’s real is almost too much for me to bear. The sound of my phone vibrating pulls me from all the thoughts.

“What?” I snap into the phone in a harsh whisper. I look over as Tay stirs in her sleep. I slip out of bed and walk out the patio door in only my boxers. The sun will be rising soon.

“Haven’t killed anyone yet?” My dad’s voice is full of laughter. Glad this is funny to him.

“You think that shit’s funny sendin’ her in like that? You know what could have happened to her if I wasn’t there?” I snap. He’s crossed a line with that one. What if I would have been at the hotel? Then what?

“Monster had orders not to leave her with anyone but you.”

I sigh at his words. Not that they make me feel any better.

“Why are you doin’ this?” I ask wanting the truth this time. I want to know what he’s trying to prove with sending her here.

“You know why. I want my son back. I want the man who was fearless. The man who stood up for what he believed in. I want my son, Mayhem. I’ve watched you run yourself into the ground for years now, and I can’t take anymore. I need you all here, not this halfway shit.” My heart thumps in my chest. I knew I was gone but that far? So far that my own dad would think he was losing me?

“She isn’t like us,” I tell him.

“I know that. All your life you’ve looked for somethin’ that conforms to our way of life, Mayhem. It’s time you look for somethin’ that conforms to who you are as a man. She’s stronger than you give her credit for. She has a good head on her. Let her decide how she wants things to play out.”

The line goes dead as I let his words linger. Let her decide. How can I when I know she could get hurt because of me? Soft hands wrap around me from behind. I suck in a breath at the warmth that encompasses me.

“It’s beautiful.” Her words are a whisper in the breeze. I look down at her where she comes to stand next to me, looking at the sunrise.

“That ocean is a lot like my life, Tay. It may be smooth one second, but a wave can sneak up and crash down on us at another. It’s not the ideal place to be. If you aren’t careful, you’ll drown in it,” I tell her gently. Her fingers slowly stroke across my abs. My heart thumps louder.

“When I was little, my dad sent me away. I never had choices. I was told what to do, when to do it, what to wear. I resented everything. Now that I can live freely out from under him, I want to make my own choices.”

Look at her! She’s being so fucking bold and standing up for herself.

“What do you mean out from under him?” I snap.

“I mean, I left. He wanted to send me back to Rome. I didn’t want that.” Her eyes dance with mischief. She is proud of herself for getting away from him.

I take a deep calming breath before I look out at the water and say, “I could give you the choice, Tay. I want to give you the choice, but I know the outcome if somethin’ happens.”  Tay steps in front of me, her hands resting on my chest. I slowly let my eyes fall closed. I just want to feel her. Feel her warmth.

“Open your eyes, Mayhem.”

I slowly slide my eyes open and peer down at her.

“I’m real. I’m here, and I don’t want to go anywhere,” she says sounding so sure of herself.

I start to open my mouth but she isn’t done yet.

“I let you say a lot of things to me. I let you persuade me to a point. I’m done. I’m an adult, and I can make some decisions on my own.”

I love how she’s holding her ground right now. My dick does too. “Is that so?” I ask her. Tay nods.

“Yep. And right now, my first decision is to take you back inside,” she says. She’s full of power right now. A strength I didn’t know she had until this very moment.

“What do you plan to do inside?” I ask her smoothly. Tay licks her lips, making my dick jump in between us. She knows it, too. I can see the blush on her cheeks.

“First I’m going to kiss every inch of you.”

She almost looks embarrassed, but I don’t want her to stop. I want her to keep going. To break free of the chains that held her back for so fucking long.

“Don’t stop, Tay.” I urge her on.

“Mayhem, I-”

I grab her face in my hands, shaking my head no. “Don’t stop.” I growl.

“I want to kiss every part of you. I want to hear you moan and say my name the way you do. It makes me wet.”

Shit! She knows exactly what to say to fucking turn me on.