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Natexus by Victoria L. James (1)

1

I'd never been the sort to take much notice of my surroundings. Up until recently, I’d lived a simple life, filled with small pleasures and basic needs. My parents said that from a young age, I had lived in a perfect little purple bubble of my own, and it had to be purple because I disliked even the thought of pink, blue or red – although I had always been quite partial to a touch of yellow, which probably had something to do with the golden colour of my hair. The smallest of distractions had forever been my weakness and, apart from my long-since-dead pet dog, Stanley, I'd never really had much of a passion or an obsession for anything.

But, my life was beginning to change all at once, and that had never been more true than on one chilly April’s eve when I was just fifteen years old.

The air felt tainted with some kind of mystery. A feeling I couldn't quite explain rumbled in my stomach as I sank deeper into my clothes, ensuring only my icy blue eyes and nose were visible from above the neck of my thick woollen jumper that sat beneath my old denim jacket. It was far too cold for the middle of April. We'd been waiting for spring to arrive for what felt like forever, but it had somehow managed to remain hidden, no matter how many weathermen gave false promises of its arrival.

I didn’t want to be where I was. Had I had any choice regarding the evening at all, I would have been sitting at home with the rest of my family, cloaked in heartache and worry for the future, and uncertainty of what we were all soon to become. But, after much pleading from my elder sister, I had been forced out of the door by my parents, and thrust into the middle of a group of my friends to traipse the streets of Calverley without purpose, just to get some fresh air into my lungs.

The village we lived in wasn’t small, but it wasn’t particularly big, either. Everyone knew enough about everyone else to smile when they walked by, but not enough to stop them and ask how each and every one of their family members were faring. All of which worked well for my family during the situation we’d found ourselves in.

The night sky was taking over and the twilight hour was finally beginning to fade away. The laughter of my friends echoed down the streets, brushing past me as I walked just a few steps behind them. Even though my attention wasn’t fully on the others, I found myself smiling anyway. Their happiness was a good sound to hear. It made a small part of me want to step into the middle of them and find something funny to say, but instead, I stayed quiet – on the edge once again.

“I can’t believe how cold it is. We're being cheated here.” Suzie thrust her hands into her trouser pockets, releasing an over exaggerated brr from her lips.

“Maybe we should all head back,” Daniella suggested, flicking her long, blonde hair back over her shoulder as she turned around to address the rest of us. Daniella was one of the most popular girls in our school, but she didn’t act like it. There wasn’t any supremacy there or an invisible crown. She saw herself as some kind of leader, a protector to her close circle, and fortunately for me, for reasons I hadn't quite figured out yet, I was lucky enough to be a part of that.

“Head back where?” Sammy, my short, but equally loyal, redheaded friend asked from beside me. “There's nothing to do around here at all. This is our rock and roll.”

I stayed quiet as usual, my brows rising from above my jumper while I watched each one in turn as they spoke.

“I dunno, but there has to be more to a Friday night than all of us standing out here freezing our–” Daniella didn’t get a chance to finish. The football that flew through the air and connected with the side of Suzie’s head caught everybody’s attention the moment she shrieked out in both surprise and, I assumed, a little bit of pain.

“What the hell?” Suzie shouted, scrunching her face up as her hand flew up to rub the side of her head. Her brown bobbed hair swung across her cheeks as she glanced from side to side in surprise.

Everyone turned at once, looking behind them as a group of five guys casually strolled our way. I recognised most from school, but I’d only spoken to one of them properly before. He was called Paul. Following him were three others who were familiar, and one extra boy I’d never seen before in my entire life.

“Paul Harris, you absolute wanker!” Suzie shrieked, quickly pulling my attention away from the unknown boy.

Paul’s mouth curled up into a cocky smile as he stalked forward and held his arms out wide.

“Awe, baby. I didn’t mean to hit you. The football must be as attracted to you as I am, that’s all. You’re like a flame to a moth, beautiful.”

Oh, and if I hadn't already mentioned, Suzie and Paul had a thing. I had no real idea what a thing was, but apparently it was somewhere between lovers and haters, and involved touching each other up behind the shop that was just around the corner from our school.

“Flattery will get you–”

“Everywhere I’ve already been.” He smirked, and just like that, Suzie’s protests quietened. By the time her mouth had opened wide in shock, he’d wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her up until she was the one looking down on him.

With the toss of a football, it seemed our party of four had turned into a party of nine. The guys attached themselves to us as we continued to walk down the street and, having sensed my sudden discomfort, Sammy hooked her arm through mine, pressing herself against me to offer me her usual, silent reassurance.

It wasn’t that I was a complete disaster or a social loser, but given what was currently going on in my life, nothing else seemed to really matter to me outside the four walls of my home. I had a purpose there – I was needed. Out here, amongst everyone else, I wasn't sure what I was meant to be.

“You hanging in there?” Sammy whispered.

My smile was weak but genuine. “I’m glad you asked me to come out tonight, Sam.”

“I was simply following orders.”

“Orders from my sister?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

“Yes, but... What’s a night out wandering the streets of Leeds without my best girl by my side?”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For always being there for me, even when I’m not always around for you.”

Sammy rolled her eyes and flashed me her bright, white smile. “Please. No thank yous needed. It's all part of our ever-maturing girl code.”

Without registering much about the direction we were heading in, or even the time, I found myself lost in my friends’ world for a while. The boys around us had commanded their attention, and even though the quiet, curious side of me wanted to take a detailed inventory of them all again, especially the new boy, I didn’t. I didn't want any of them to see the pain I was trying to hide, and my friends were better company than I was anyway. I could enjoy peering in from the sidelines and still have a good night. I was becoming good at being a wallflower when it was required of me.

“Hey, we’ve gone full circle,” Suzie shouted over her shoulder from her new piggyback position on Paul’s back. Hitching her legs up, he spun them both around until they were walking backwards so they could face the rest of the group. They looked comfortable in their ‘thing’. Happy.

“We’re only two streets away from my house.” Daniella pouted.

And three streets away from mine, I thought to myself. As soon as I realised how close we were, the pull of my home wrapped itself around me and begged me to return. I could practically smell my mum's flower arrangements in the garden.

Sammy must have felt my shuffling and unease, tightening her arm around mine and sucking in a long breath of air.

“Let’s head back to the park,” she offered.

“I’m game,” Paul shouted.

“Me, too,” Daniella chipped in enthusiastically.

“Me, three,” came a male voice from somewhere to my left, and before I knew it, everyone was handing in their yes votes to turn in the other direction, while my feet stayed rooted firmly to the ground. Nobody waited for my response, and it was only when they’d all passed me by, like my vote didn't matter anyway, that I tugged on Sammy’s arm and held her back.

The moment her beautiful, pale green eyes met my ever so cold blue ones, I offered her a redundant smile and signalled over my shoulder.

“I think I should head back home.”

“What? No. C’mon, Nat, there’s more fun to be had yet.” Her hands began to tug me in the direction of everyone else, but it was too late. My mind was already made up. My home and my family were calling me. I’d already had all the fun I could have that night. I was grateful for the reprieve, I was grateful for the fresh air in my blood and the reminder of what laughter sounded like, but I couldn’t help but believe we’d come full circle on our journey for a reason.

There was somewhere else I needed to be.

Luckily for me, I didn’t need to tell Sammy my reasons. She already knew. My smile mixed with the hint of sadness in my eyes said enough. “You going to be alright getting home by yourself?”

“I’m sure I can find my way.”

“The world is full of strangers and weirdos. You be careful.”

I was about to answer. My lips had parted and I had my speech ready. I could handle it all. I would be safe. I would call her in the morning. She shouldn’t worry. She should go out and have fun. The words were all there, lined up in order, only they never got the chance to leap out of my mouth before someone else jumped in to interrupt me.

The boy I didn’t recognise.

“I’ll walk her home,” he offered through a heavy breath as he casually jogged up to us with that infamous football under his arm.

Sammy’s eyes widened in a way I’d never seen them do before, while mine went into an unexplainable blinking overdrive as soon as he came into full view.

My attention rose up to the copper ends of his unruly hair before it drifted down to the thick but somehow perfectly manicured shape of his dark eyebrows that sheltered the purest hazel coloured eyes I’d ever seen.

Hazel, I thought. What a magnificent colour.

I’d become good at schooling my expression when I needed to, and even though there was no doubt in my mind that, whoever this boy was, he was beautiful, I didn’t let it show. I wasn't even sure I knew how to let that stuff show anymore.

Looking between the two of us, he smiled lazily, just enough that it tugged at one corner of his mouth, allowing me a glimpse of his brilliant, white teeth.

“I’m heading that way myself,” he told me. “And I promise you, I’m not a weirdo.”

“But you are a stranger… to us, anyway.” Sammy examined him from head to toe, no doubt taking in the way his jeans hung perfectly from his hips, and the way his baggy grey hoodie sat on his unusually strong shoulders.

“I guess you have a point there,” he replied. The quiet that surrounded us all was only interrupted the moment he chose to let out a small sigh before turning to face me, staring straight into my eyes with an intensity that had me hitching in a breath. “I guess I should probably fix that. Hi. I'm Alexander Law.”

“Natalie,” I whispered back without thought.

“Natalie, did you say?”

“Yes. Vincent. Natalie Vincent.”

“Nice to meet you, Natalie Vincent.” He smiled.

“Likewise.”

“Now that we know each other's names, I'm no longer a stranger, right?”

I pressed my lips together quickly to stop myself from saying anything else. I hadn’t meant to speak my name once, let alone twice, but something about the velvet, reassuring tones of his already matured voice had me reacting without thought. My stomach twisted and I quickly tore my eyes away from his, too afraid of what else I might do or say if I was to look at him again.

“I'm Sammy,” my friend said quietly. I knew that voice. It was her detective voice. The one that held a thousand questions but also, fortunately, had enough restraint to wait to ask them. “Samantha Anderson, actually.”

Alexander’s small laugh brought goosebumps to my arms. “Nice to meet you, too, Samantha Anderson actually.”

“Oh, we have a smart one,” she hit back through an obvious smile.

“I'm not sure about that, although I know enough to point out that you might want to make a run for it if you have any hope of catching up to the others. They’re getting farther and farther away.”

Peering up from the corners of my eyes, I caught Sammy’s attention, noticing the look of panic that flashed across her face. For reasons I would probably never be able to explain, I forced myself to smile as genuinely as I could, another silent message passing between the two of us. She should go. It was fine. I was good.

I almost believed it for a moment, too.

“Okay, Alexander Law, if that is indeed your real name. Promise me you’re not a weirdo,” Sammy challenged.

“Promise,” he assured her confidently. “Just heading in the same direction as your friend and wanting to make sure she gets home in one piece.”

“Then you’ll do for me.” Offering him a friendly slap on the shoulder, she jumped up and down on her feet before pointing in my direction. “Be safe. I love you. Call me in the morning.”

“I will.” I nodded and swallowed gently, hoping neither she nor Alexander saw. And just like that, she was gone, sprinting up the road to the rest of the gang before they all eventually disappeared around the corner, leaving me and someone I’d only just met standing on the pavement of a deserted street in Calverley with nothing at all to say.

I should have felt more nervous than I did.

Skimming my toes over the surface of the ground, I spun around and looked back up into his eyes. The streetlamp behind us highlighted the tones of his hair like only the sun should have done, and the pure whites of his eyes twinkled as he stared back at me, his face wearing nothing but a smile.

“Shall we?” he asked, not blinking or moving.

“Shall we what?”

“I was going to say shall we get you home, but if you have any other ideas…”

“No,” I rushed out. “No other ideas. Home is good.”

“You sure?”

“Sure.”

“Natalie Vincent?”

“Yes?”

“Please don't be nervous. I’m not that kind of guy.”

“And what kind of guy is that?” I asked softly.

“The kind of guy who sees the shy girl hanging at the back of the group and assumes she's an easy target.”

My head fell gently to one side as I stared at him and tightened my hold over my own chest. Every part of my body was begging me to move, to make some kind of gesture to shake away the unease at someone being so frank with me, but I held my position, not wanting to go anywhere. Not even home.

“Then what kind of guy are you?”

Alexander took a small step closer, his smile growing ever so slightly as the wave of his boyish aftershave washed over me and tried to steal every breath I’d ever owned.

“The kind that doesn’t want someone else seeing the shy, pretty girl walking home alone, and have him thinking he can be the one to take advantage of her.”

“Oh.”

Alexander grinned. “Indeed.”

“That was kinda charming.” I beamed unintentionally, pulling my chin back just a touch to try to hide how impressed I really was.

“Maybe it was just the truth.” Raising a brow, he copied my head tilt and stared me down. All I could see was the colour hazel, and I began to wonder why I’d never noticed just how much brighter and more beautiful hazel was than all the purples of the world put together.

“Maybe,” I whispered.

“So…”

“Yes?”

“Shall we get you home?”

“Okay,” I answered quickly, rubbing my lips together once again before I dragged my teeth over my bottom lip repeatedly and spun around. My chin dropped down to my chest. It wasn’t anything to do with his company, more a habit I’d developed in the last six months, one that was beginning to feel increasingly more natural than I would have previously liked. The ground held few challenges for me, whereas when I looked up, the whole world now seemed more dangerous than it probably really was.

We walked in silence for a while, although a while wasn’t really very much time at all. I tried to keep my steps slow, the exact same way he was doing, somehow unusually at ease walking side by side with this person I didn't know.

“I haven’t seen you around here before,” I said softly.

“You obviously haven’t been paying attention,” he replied quietly.

“Guilty as charged.” I smiled again, wanting to peek up but instead, keeping my eyes trained on the floor in front of me. “But I’m pretty sure I’d have seen you around school before now if you went to Calverley High.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because I... I never forget a face,” I lied. I forgot faces all the time. I swallowed again, hating the way the lump in my throat seemed to get stuck on its way back down every time I discreetly tried to find some composure. “So where do you go?”

“As of next week, I’ll be at Calverley. I used to go to Whitecross, but…”

“They’re closing it down,” I finished for him.

“Exactly.”

I stopped in my tracks and waited for him to do the same, and when he did, he turned and looked back at me with no expression on his face at all.

“How do you know where I live?”

“Excuse me?”

“You told Sammy you were heading my way. How do you know where I'm going?”

He smiled slowly. “I pay attention.”

There wasn’t much explanation for what I was thinking or what I was feeling. This didn’t feel like the kind of instant crush every teenage girl developed at the sight of someone new arriving on the scene. I wasn’t even sure it was a crush at all, more an appreciation for what he was and what a good job his parents had done in creating and moulding him to be the kind of fifteen-year-old boy that walked a lonely girl home. The world was a dark, unfair place at times, and no one knew that more than I did now. But Alexander had come along out of nowhere just a matter of minutes ago, and something about him felt almost… light.

Like he was hope itself.

Like he was a reminder of what could exist beyond the dark world I now knew.

My smile grew and grew as I watched his face crease up in confusion.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, taking a careful step back towards me.

“Nothing,” I answered with a small shake of my head. “Nothing at all, Alexander.”

“Call me Alex.”

“Alex,” I repeated almost reverently.

And just as I was about to sigh in a small moment of contentment, my whole body stiffened at the sight of someone running towards me when I glanced over Alex’s shoulder. The sound of her feet slapping against the concrete must have caught his attention, too, forcing him to spin on the spot as he prepared himself for whoever was sprinting our way.

The look of horror on my mother’s face as she charged towards us said it all. The tearstains down her cheeks were obvious even from a distance, and the pain she was suffering with every breath she wheezed out had my body turning to ice.

There wasn’t anything else in the world that mattered as soon as the words broke free from her strangled throat.

“Natalie! Elizabeth, she needs you. It’s time…”

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