Nate
When we got back to the maze, the dregs all gathered in the workout room to discuss Darcy and her demands. I told Alissa to wait for me in my apartment, but she followed me into the room, determined to listen in.
Tony shot her a glare. “This doesn’t involve you. Go back to Nate’s apartment.”
She lifted her chin. “If it involves Nate, then it involves me.”
“Leave her alone.” I sent Tony a warning look. “She can stay.”
The other dregs exchanged glances, but no one else said anything about Alissa being there. She sat down on the edge of the sparring mat, crossing her legs, and listened quietly as the discussions began.
We spent the next two hours in heated arguments, questions and opinions coming from all sides. We passed around the file folders on the individuals Darcy wanted us to take care of. Several of us had seen the CEO of the pharmaceutical company at the facility several times in the past, handing over a large canister each time, which probably contained the experimental drugs they’d injected us with over the years. We had also witnessed the zoo owner bringing his container with him. That must have been the animal DNA.
Some of us had also seen the Army sergeant at the facility over the years, so there was no doubt in any of our minds that those three individuals were indeed associated with The Company and likely shareholders. However, none of us had ever seen the state senator at the facility in the past, but that really wasn’t a surprise. A government official would likely have kept his association with The Company a secret.
So, what did we do? Did we consider this another assignment and take out the targets? We weren’t soldiers anymore. We hadn’t been pumped full of drugs and our brains overwhelmed with the years of conditioning that had forced us to obey before. Now, each of us had a conscience. A mind of our own. None of us wanted to kill, to shoot these men with a sniper rifle. But what choice did we have? Our freedom hung in the balance.
At the end of that two hours, we hadn’t reached an agreement. The only two things we were able to agree on were that we all wanted our freedom, and we all wanted access to the personal information that was in our files, the records of our pasts and our families.
Some of us remembered a little of our pasts, but not much. If the other dregs had full or even half siblings, a mother who was living, then they wanted to know. We all did. I hadn’t asked Darcy about my mother, assuming she was dead. But what if she was alive? I had to meet my sister, Katie, and any other family members who might be living.
The dregs were divided. Some of us would do anything for our freedom and for the information in our files, while others of us had limits as to what we’d do.
I didn’t want to kill anyone. Lord knew I’d killed enough people as it was. But I wanted my freedom. I wanted to meet my sister.
So therein lay the dilemma. Did we murder these men in the hopes that Darcy would keep her word? Or did we refuse and try to deal with anything else that came our way?
We all decided to think about it some more, then regroup later and discuss it again. It wasn’t a decision to be taken lightly.
Alissa jumped to her feet and followed me as I left the gym. I didn’t know what to say to her, so I remained silent as we entered my apartment and I closed the door. I moved away from her, heading for the fridge.
She followed. “What are you going to do?”
I grabbed a cold water from the fridge and guzzled it. “I don’t know. I don’t want to talk about this right now. I’ve talked about it enough for one day.”
Hurt flickered in her pretty brown eyes, making me feel like a cad.
“Just so you know,” she whispered. “I don’t condone killing. It’s wrong.”
I sighed loudly and raked a hand through my hair. “What the hell do you want me to do, Alissa?”
“Just say no.”
I slammed the water bottle down on the countertop. “That’s easy for you to say. You don’t know what it’s like being a dreg.”
Tears swam in her eyes. “No, I don’t. But I do know what it’s like to be in love with a dreg.”
The breath caught in my lungs. What? She was in love with me? I swallowed hard. Words failed me in that moment. I didn’t deserve her love. I didn’t deserve her.
Warmth filled my chest. Did she really love me? Was that even possible? I didn’t know what to do with that information.
I cleared my throat. “Alissa...I…”
She stepped forward and I drew her into my arms. We clung to each other for a long moment, neither wanting to let go. I cared deeply for this woman. And those feelings scared the hell out of me. I couldn’t process that right now. I wasn’t ready. I had to deal with Darcy first.
I pressed a kiss to Alissa’s forehead. “I need to be alone for a little while, okay? I’m going to the surface so I can think. Process things.”
She nodded and stepped back. “Okay. I’ll wait here for you.”
I squeezed her hand. “Thank you.” I felt her gaze following as I went out and closed the door behind me. I headed through the maze toward the surface. I really did need to be alone right now.
I reached the forest and carefully scanned the area for danger. The sun was slowly making its presence known, soft light coming over the horizon. I breathed in the fresh scent of the pines and closed my eyes.
I was conflicted. Should I accept Darcy’s deal and kill those men in exchange for my freedom? I didn’t have to involve the other dregs. None of them had to get any blood on their hands. Could I do this myself without them? It wasn’t as if the shareholders were good people. They were evil, cruel. They’d helped torture and abuse us and countless other soldiers. They deserved to die. They needed to be stopped before they harmed any more people.
What if I fulfilled my end of the bargain and Darcy failed to fulfill hers? What if I murdered four people, and instead of earning my freedom, I had to spend the rest of my life on the run, forever living in fear of being caught? If I thought it was difficult now, it would be a million times worse if the entire country was hunting the dregs.
But I might get to see my sister, whom I’d never met. And maybe even my mother, if she was still alive. I’d never had a real family before, except for my dreg brothers. I would give up a hell of a lot to meet my family. To get to know them. To possibly have a future with them.
And if I did this, I might have a chance of a future with Alissa.
Or not. She didn’t condone killing. She’d made it plain that if I did this, she might leave.
I groaned and rubbed my hands over my face. If we didn’t do this deal with Darcy, Darcy would destroy us all. Didn’t Alissa understand that? If we didn’t somehow get rid of The Company, none of us would have a future.
I fished my phone out of my pocket. This decision would determine my future. And the future of all my dreg brothers.
I clicked on Darcy’s number and waited while it rang.
“Have you made your decision?” Darcy asked.
I hesitated, knowing full well this decision could cost me Alissa. It could cost me love. But I really had no other choice, did I? If I wanted even a smidgen of a future, then I had to do this.
“Nate? You there?”
“Yes,” I said at last. “I’ll do it.”