Nate
While Alissa was in the shower, I went to tell the other dregs about my decision. I still couldn’t believe Alissa had said she was in love with me. No one had ever said that to me before. I was still trying to process that.
Goddamn. That made my chest swell with emotion. I hadn’t thought I was loveable after all the things I’d done. But Alissa made me feel loveable. She made me feel special.
And I loved her, too.
But I hadn’t said the words. Opening myself up like that scared the shit out of me. Being vulnerable was something I still wasn’t comfortable with. Feelings were something I was uncomfortable with. I’d been taught to never be vulnerable, to never show emotions. I wanted to tell her how I felt, but I couldn’t seem to do it yet.
I’d told her I was crazy about her, which was about as close to saying I loved her as I was comfortable with right now. Even that admission hadn’t been easy for me. But I’d wanted her to know I cared about her. So I’d shown her, over and over, when we’d made love.
She made me so damn happy, my head was now filling with thoughts of a real future with her. A life of our own. Together.
Happiness was something I’d never thought would ever happen to me.
But now, with Alissa, I had hope. I had dreams. I wanted.
The other dregs were waiting for me when I entered the workout room. From the looks on their faces, they’d been having a heated discussion before I’d arrived.
“What’s up?” I joined them where they were all hanging out by the sparring ring.
“We’ve just been discussing what to do,” Luke informed me. “We all agree that these four men are despicable human beings and that they deserve to die.” He tapped the folders he held in his hand. “But Noah and Logan don’t want any part of it. Ryan’s still on the fence. And Tony and I are all for it. I’ll take out one target, Tony will take out one, and if you’re willing, you can take out one. Then we can draw straws to see who will take out the fourth one.”
“I’ll do it,” Ryan spoke up. “I’ll take out the last one. No need for one of you to have to do it twice.”
I was relieved I wouldn’t have to do this alone, even though I’d been prepared to do just that.
I met everyone’s gaze and nodded. “Okay. I’m more than willing to take out one of the targets. We need to discuss strategy, figure out how this is going to go down.”
Logan shook his head in disgust. “I can’t believe you guys are going to actually do this. It’s one thing to kill someone when you’re freeing the innocent or fighting for your life. But it’s another thing entirely to take aim at someone through your rifle scope, and kill them in cold-blood.”
“What the fuck do you think we did for The Company all those years?” Luke growled out. “We are killers! That’s what we did.”
“It wasn’t all we did, and you know it! And it sure as hell wasn’t by choice. Can you honestly say you enjoyed the killing?” Logan shot back. “That you liked it?”
Silence.
“None of us liked it,” Ryan murmured. “We only did what we had to do.”
Logan threw his hands in the air. “I can’t believe you guys! We don’t have to do this. We can find another way.”
I rubbed a hand over my face. Alissa’s words came back to me then.
You don’t have to kill. You can find another way. There’s always another way.
What if she was right? What if there was another way?
What other way could there possibly be?
As if my thoughts had conjured her here, Alissa suddenly appeared in the doorway to the workout room.
My heart gave a little flutter in my chest. She was so gorgeous. Inside and out. I was a goner, so crazy about her. God help me, I loved her. She may have said she’d support me in this, but I knew she didn’t really approve. How could I disappoint her like this? How would this make me a better man?
Alissa’s gaze landed on mine. She sent me a hesitant smile, then stepped into the room.
Silence fell. Everyone glanced uncomfortably from her to me. My face heated. Did they all know Alissa and I had become lovers? Of course they did.
She paused next to me, then glanced at Logan. “I told Nate I would support him no matter what he chooses to do. But I also agree with you. What if there is another way?”
Tony glowered at her. “Just because you fucked Nate doesn’t make you one of us. You don’t get to share your opinions. We don’t care what you think.”
“Is that right?” Alissa stepped right up to Tony, obviously having gotten over her fear of him, and locked eyes with him. “Want me to kick your ass in the ring again?”
Luke snickered.
Ryan laughed out loud.
Noah and Logan exchanged glances, but neither spoke.
I merely waited, watching to see how Tony would respond. He might pretend he didn’t like her, but he respected her. Especially now, after she’d proved how strong she was.
His lip curled in a sneer. “Don’t kid yourself. I let you kick my ass before.”
She nodded. “I know. And I appreciate it. You helped me tremendously.” She glanced around at the group, meeting everyone’s gaze. “Tony’s right that I’m not one of you and I never will be.”
Tony, for once, appeared speechless, the look on his face priceless. I had to hold back a laugh. It was hard to shock Tony, but I think she just had.
“But I care about each of you, one of you in particular.” She paused, her gaze resting on mine. “And I don’t want anything bad to happen to any of you.”
Noah cleared his throat. “What are you saying?”
She looked at Noah. “It’s no secret that I’ve now been a victim several times over. I hate that word. Victim. It implies weakness. Suffering. Violence. No one wants to be a victim. Nate may or may not have told you guys I was also a victim of a violent rape several years ago.”
Silence descended. Everyone lowered their gazes.
My chest squeezed. Shit. She was going to tell them about that? I wanted to protect her, tell her to be quiet, tell her she didn’t have to cause herself any more pain by bringing that up. But she went on, bravely holding her head high, glancing at each of them. Apparently, she had something to say, and she was going to say it.
Not a single one of us was comfortable right now.
“So,” she continued, “if anyone should want to kill someone, it should be me. But I don’t want to kill the men who raped me, who left me so broken inside I became a mere shell of the girl I once was. I don’t want to kill Romeo or Enrique or their thugs for all the terrible things they did to me. What does killing really accomplish, anyway? There’s always going to be someone else who steps up, someone more evil than the last guy. Instead, you find another way. A better way to deal with the situation. A way that makes you stronger.”
She looked at Tony. “You showed me another way to heal, and for that, I am very grateful. I know if you guys all put your heads together, you’ll come up with another way besides killing. A better way to handle this situation.”
Tony held her stare, but I could see the thoughts flickering behind his eyes. He was weighing every word she said, considering each one.
So was I.
What if there truly was another way? What if we could remove the threat somehow and still find a way to be free at the same time?
Damn. I stared at Alissa with new respect. I was generally more open-minded, but for some reason, I hadn’t listened to her earlier. Instead, I’d stubbornly turned away, assuming I was right, convinced that killing these men was the only thing we could do.
What if I was wrong?
I had refused to listen to her because I’d been dead set on doing this deal so that I could have a future with Alissa, so I could be free. I wanted a future with her. So badly. I wanted my freedom. Desperately. What if she was right? What if I could still have a future with her without doing this deal? What if there really was another way?
“Do you have a suggestion?” I asked her.
She turned her head, her gaze meeting mine. “I don’t know. I’m not a dreg. I’m not special like you guys are. I don’t have your talents or abilities. Certainly you guys can come up with something besides more killing.”
Logan nodded his head, obviously in complete agreement with her.
Noah grinned. “She’s so right. We’re the dregs. We’re unique. Each of us.” He glanced around the group. “We escaped so we could be free, so we didn’t have to kill anymore. While we’re not exactly free, at least we aren’t prisoners anymore. And we don’t have to kill unless we need to. That Darcy chick is just trying to use us to get her way. Fuck her. Let her release the information about us. What more harm can it really do? The world already thinks we’re bad.”
And then it hit me.
Records.
That was it. If Darcy had access to The Company’s records, then certainly there was proof somewhere of what these four men had done. Enough proof to send them to prison for life.
“What about The Company’s records,” I said, causing everyone to glance at me. “Shouldn’t there be enough information in those files to put these bastards behind bars for life? We can convince Darcy to release that information. And then we can free.”
“Won’t that affect us?” Noah asked.
“Not if she only releases the information about the shareholders and not the information about us.”
“That’s a brilliant idea.” Alissa smiled. “In fact, I would like to help in any way I can. I can go talk to this Darcy woman. You know, woman to woman, and try to convince her that killing them might not be the best answer.”
“No,” I said instantly. “You’re not going anywhere near her. She’s aligned herself with all the gangs. It’s too dangerous.”
Alissa lifted her chin. “Just because we had sex doesn’t mean you get to tell me what to do.”
Luke snickered.
Ryan covered his mouth and coughed.
“You should let her help,” Tony said. “Alissa has proved she’s not a weakling. And another woman might be able to convince Darcy to do it. You know none of us wants to kill if we don’t have to.”
Tony was agreeing with her now? That was the shock of all shockers. I glared at him. But he just smirked and cocked a brow.
Then I conceded that he was right. None of us wanted to kill if we didn’t have to. Should I agree to let Alissa come with us to meet with Darcy and see if she might be able to help convince Darcy that killing wasn’t necessarily the answer? I didn’t like putting her in any more danger. She’d been through enough as it was.
Alissa glanced at Tony. “Thank you. Everyone deserves to know about their families. Everyone deserves to be happy. To be free. You guys especially.” She glanced around the group again.
“Us, especially?” Ryan raised a brow. “Why? We’re dregs. Worthless.”
She scoffed. “None of you are worthless. Noah said it best. You’re all unique. You’re all special. Each one of you. And you all deserve to be happy, and to be free, and to know where you came from and who you are.”
Damn. When she spoke so fervently like that, she made me want to believe I actually deserved those things, too. Sure, I wanted those things. But deserved them?
“It’s settled then.” Tony turned to Alissa. “If Nate won’t help you, then I’ll take you. We’ll go see this Darcy chick and see if we can get her to change her mind.”
The hell he was. If anyone was going in with Alissa, it was me.
Tony was agreeing not to kill? Alissa was swaying him now? Should I be happy or pissed?
I stepped forward, wrapping an arm around Alissa’s waist and dragging her against me. “I’m going with her. If anyone else wants to come along to make sure we don’t get killed, that would certainly be helpful. There’s no telling how Darcy might react. She’s not violent, but she does have the four major gangs on her payroll, so anything could happen.”
Luke jumped off the edge of the sparring ring where he’d perched during our meeting. “I’ll come. I’m in the mood for some action. Anything beats staying down here all the time.”
The others all murmured their agreement.
We all needed some fresh air every now and then. And some action.
“Let’s go meet this chick.” Ryan smirked. “Maybe a group meeting with the dregs will scare her a bit.”
“Let’s only hope,” Luke muttered.
Since we might be dealing with the gangs, we all headed into the weapons room to gather plenty of weapons and ammo. We had to be prepared for anything. Even Noah and Logan had decided to come along. Killing gang members didn’t bother any of us. That would be nothing more than self-defense.
But if we didn’t have to sniper out the four shareholders, and instead let them take the fall for their own actions when Darcy released The Company’s records, all the better. That kind of killing none of us was particularly fond of.
Fifteen minutes later, we reached the surface. My phone chimed at me.
Six missed calls. Two voicemails. Three text messages. All from Darcy.
I had a bad feeling about this.
I checked the texts first.
Why won’t you answer your phone? Call me.
Then: Dammit, Nate, I’m in trouble! I need your help. Please call me.
And the final text: Please, please call me. It’s extremely urgent. My gang protection is gone. I’m scared for my life. The shareholders must have bought them all off. Please, please, if you have a heart, help me. Please!
The other dregs paused to wait while I read the texts to them out loud. Then I played the voicemail messages on speaker phone so everyone could hear.
“Nate, this is Darcy. Please pick up. I’m in danger. I need your help. I promise I will give you guys all your information if you just help me get out of here. Please.” She let out a sob and the message ended.
“Jesus,” Luke muttered. “Do you think the message is genuine?”
I didn’t know.
I played the last message.
“Dammit, Nate! Pick up your phone! I promise I’m not going to screw you over. I just want you to help me get out of here before they kill me.” She started to cry. “I promise I will give you all of your information. All of it! Please, please help me before they come back. Please.” The call ended.
No one said anything for a long moment.
“Romeo hurt her,” Alissa whispered, catching my gaze. “I can feel it. She’s terrified. I know from firsthand experience what a monster Romeo is. You guys can’t ignore her plea. You have to help her.”
Everyone exchanged glances.
“Fuck,” Tony muttered. “I want the information in my file.”
“So do I.” Luke glanced at me. “And if they get to her before we do, we’ll never get that information.”
“What if it’s a trap?” Logan asked, glancing at each of us. “What if they’re making her say that to get us to show up so they can kill us all?”
“She called six times, left two voicemails and three texts,” I pointed out. “She’s desperate. She’s scared. Because she no longer has any protection and she’s afraid the shareholders will come for her. That’s what my gut is telling me.” I glanced around at the others. “What do you guys think?”
Tony nodded. “Yeah. I agree.”
The others all murmured their agreement.
I glanced at Alissa. “It will be safer for you to stay here. But I’m not going to tell you what to do.”
Her gaze met mine. “I’m coming with you.”
Though I wasn’t happy with the idea of Alissa in possible danger once again, I couldn’t stop her. She was her own woman, and she’d certainly proven her strength.
We all headed for the garage. And several minutes later, we were heading out.
Having no idea what we were about to encounter.