Chapter 10
Clay
“Hey love, how are you feeling this morning?” Beck asks as soon as I walk into On Pointe the next morning.
“Mostly better.”
“Uh-huh, go on,” Beck prompts.
“Max was cool about the bondage stuff...too cool, actually.”
“What do you mean?”
“He was, like, into it, I think,” I divulge, the reality still feeling a little raw. I’m glad if I can help Max find a part of himself he’s never known about. But, if I’m being honest, I’m crazy jealous of whoever will reap the benefits.
Beck’s eyes widen. “Oh my god, I told you he had a thing for you.”
“No, sweetie,” I shake my head sadly. “He was into the idea of bondage. He asked all these questions about it, like where to learn how to do it and stuff. So now he’s going to turn from a sexy straight boy, to a kinky sexy straight boy. He’s going to find some gorgeous, kinky woman, and they’ll live kinkily ever after.”
“Deep breaths, babe,” Beck suggests, rubbing my back.
“You take deep breaths,” I snap an immature comeback, and Beck chuckles at me.
“Good one. Hey, why don’t you come out to O’Malley’s tonight? Gage and I are going out with all the guys. Invite Max if you want. You need some serious unwinding.”
“Trust me, a drink isn’t the kind of unwinding I need,” I mutter.
“Sorry, can’t help you there.”
“Yeah, apparently no one can,” I groan in full on pity party mode now.
“He’s out there dude. My money is still on Max, but if not him, then someone. Your perfect, kinky, sweet man is right around the corner.”
“Well, if you can tell me which corner, it would really speed this process up.”
“I know, babe. I wish I could tell you where to find Mr. Right. What I can tell you, though, is that it’s so worth the wait once you find him.”
I sigh at the dreamy look that comes over Beck’s face. I want what he has with Gage. Beck’s man accepts all his makeup and lace happily and loves him even more for it. That’s what I need. I need a man who will love me inside and out and love me even more for my bondage kink. Not like I’m asking much.
“Yeah, I’ll come tonight, and I’ll invite Max.”
“Yay!” Beck claps his hands enthusiastically.
“Now go do something useful so I have time to get paperwork and shit done.” I wave him off and head for the stack of stuff piling up in my office. I will admit the one thing I didn’t count on when opening a business was that I’d have a lot more paperwork and a lot less time to dance.
I pull out my phone and text Max with an invite for tonight, and he responds ten minutes later agreeing to meet at the bar down the street from Heathens Ink where Beck’s boyfriend and all his friends work.
Max
I stared at Clay’s text for ten minutes before agreeing to go to the bar tonight with Beck’s friends.
It’s nothing out of the ordinary. We go to O’Malley’s at least twice a month with the tattoo artists from Heathens. Sometimes a cop named Cas joins us and moons over the bartender—Beau—he’s banging. All of this is average in my life. So why am I suddenly hesitant?
Maybe because spending the night with a bunch of gay couples is a little too strange right now when I’m crushing on Clay?
Am I crushing on Clay?
I let out a frustrated breath as I replace the spark plugs on the Chevy I’m working on.
I already decided I can’t be crushing on Clay because I’m straight. And straight guys don’t just wake up gay one day. That’s not how things work. You know you’re gay from like birth or whatever.
I pull out my phone and type a quick text, telling Clay I’m in for tonight. Hanging out with a bunch of gay couples didn’t turn me gay. I’m being ridiculous, and I need to knock it off already. Maybe I can even find a woman who’ll catch my attention at the bar tonight and then I’ll prove to myself that I like women as much as I always have.
Besides, I could use a night of fun before I have to go talk to Jess tomorrow.
◆◆◆
After work, I ride my bike home and jump in the shower to get ready to go out.
The hot water cascades over my tight muscles, and my mind betrays me by conjuring up the image of Clay, wondering how beautiful his tattoos must look as the water runs over them.
My chest heaves, and I don’t even bother to shake off the image for a handful of heartbeats: Clay with his hair wet and his skin pink under the hot stream of water. In my mind, Clay lowers himself to his knees and looks up at me with longing. My hand travels toward my aching cock before I realize what I’m doing and hurriedly shut off the water.
I jump out of the shower and reach for a towel. I dry myself off quickly, avoiding my cock, which hasn’t gotten the message and is still hard as stone.
I am not going to jerk off thinking about my best friend...again.
I wrap the towel around my waist and pull open the bathroom door in a rush, needing to get to my room and put my clothes on immediately. My body smacks against a smaller mass, and I freeze when Clay’s hands come up and brace against my stomach. My skin tingles at every point of contact with his smooth fingertips.
Please don’t let him notice me tenting the towel.
“Sorry,” Clay blushes and steps back and then out of my way.
“It’s fine,” I grunt, hurrying to put him behind me before he can realize how painfully hard I am.
It’s not until pulling on my pants that I realize Clay was supposed to meet me at the bar, not at home.
I open my door and call out to Clay who appears from his own room a few seconds later.
“What’s up?” Clay asks.
“What are you doing home? I thought I was meeting you at the bar?”
“Yeah, I spilled coffee on my shirt, so I needed to come home and change.”
I catch Clay’s eyes roaming over my chest and realize I haven’t pulled a shirt on yet. To my surprise, his gaze on my bare skin is like a caress. His tongue swipes along his bottom lip and makes my cock hard all over again. My body is trembling, desperate to reach for him and...I’m not sure what exactly, except in my mind there’s a lot of skin-to-skin contact.
I bite back a groan at the images flashing through my mind. “Uh, I’d better finish getting ready,” I mumble before stumbling backward into my room again.
I unbutton my pants and adjust my erection so it’s less painful, unable to resist a few slow strokes. I don’t know why I’m teasing myself when I know I don’t have time to jerk off. Not to mention, I’m not going to let myself get off to Clay. I won’t.
A few minutes later there’s a tentative knock at my door.
“You almost ready?”
“Yeah, here I come,” I call back, taking a deep breath and trying to focus on a clear mind.
When we get to O’Malley’s, all the other guys are already there.
The first time I met the crew from Heathens, I didn’t really know how to take them. They’re a tight-knit group, and it’s intimidating as hell, and I was surprised to see them welcome me into their close family unit. Over the past year since Beck and Gage have been together, I’ve gotten to know these guys better, even if I do feel like I stick out like a sore thumb being the only straight guy here.
Beck waves Clay and me over to the tables they’ve grabbed in the corner of the bar.
“You go, I’ll grab a couple drinks for us,” I offer.
“Thanks, I’ll get the next round.”
As Clay walks away, my eyes find his tight, round ass, and my stomach flips and aches with longing before I tear my eyes away and head to the bar.
“Hey there, how’re you doin’ tonight?” the bartender, Beau, greets me with a bright smile.
“I’m good, how about you?”
“Can’t complain,” he shrugs and chuckles.
It’s common knowledge that all the guys—plus the only woman who works at Heathens, Dani—all think Beau is a total hottie. I take a second to assess him. If I’m suddenly gay, I should want to jump this guy, that much I’m sure of.
He’s certainly attractive, with shaggy blond hair and piercing blue eyes. Plus, he’s got fantastic ink covering his arms, which is always a turn on. Not to mention his pouty lips and a killer smile. He’s good looking; there’s no denying that. But, I don’t have the urge to drag him to my bedroom and have my way with him like I’ve been having toward Clay.
“Can I get you anything?” Beau prompts after what I’m sure was a long awkward silence while I checked him out.
“Two rum and cokes.”
Beau turns to grab the drinks and a hulking form appears beside me.
“You checking out my man?” Cas accuses with narrowed eyes.
My own eyes go wide as I grapple for a defense. I was checking out Beau, and I am so busted.
“I, uh…”
Cas’ serious expression morphs into a smile, and then he starts to laugh.
“I’m just fucking with you. Beau is hot as fuck, look all you want. Hell, we’re open so feel free to do more than look if he’s into it.”
“Uh…”
“Wait, aren’t you straight?” Cas cocks his head and examines me.
“Yeah, I’m straight,” I confirm with less confidence in my tone than I would’ve liked when answering that question. “I was just...checking.”
Cas’ smile softens.
“Sometimes being bi is a lot harder than being gay, I think. You know you’re attracted to women and that’s so much easier than taking a deeper look at your sexuality.”
“Thanks, but I don’t think I am—bi that is.”
“Okay. I am, and so are Beau, Adam, Royal, Nash, and Owen. If you ever wanted to talk more about it with anyone, we’re here.”
I nod and accept the drinks from Beau when he returns. I throw down a generous tip and then head over to the table where Clay is waiting for his drink.
Could Cas be right? Maybe I’m bi? But that still doesn’t explain why it would take me until thirty-two years old to figure it out. It’s more likely the kink, which makes the most sense.
Around the table, there’s a spate of happy couples—or trio in one case. I’ve never been obsessed with relationships or anything, but in the last year or two, I’ve noticed a certain longing surprising me every once in a while. It would be nice to have someone to come home to every night, to share my days with, to share my life with. They would have to love Gigi as much as I do, of course.
“Hey, Max, you have any ink?” Royal asks from his place between his two men, Nash and Zade.
“No, he doesn’t,” Clay answers for me and then blushes like he’d admitted more than he intended to.
“How do you know? Maybe I’ve got a secret tat on my ass,” I joke.
“Sorry dude, but I’ve seen your ass.” Clay smirks at me over the rim of his glass and something warm settles over me.
“No, I don’t have any ink. Why?” I ask Royal.
“He loves inking virgins, so he’s trying to drum someone up,” Nash explains with a smirk.
“Oh, actually there is a tattoo I’ve wanted for a while. I’ve been psyching myself up for it.”
“Hell yeah, come by this week, and I will hook you up,” Royal declares.
“Okay, I’m sold. I’ll come in Wednesday.”
At the far end of the table, I catch Adam smiling as he watches Beck sitting on Gage’s lap, the two of them lost in conversation and each other’s eyes.
The only single guy, aside from Clay and me, is Owen. He’s sitting two seats down from me, looking content as can be among all the couples.
Then there’s Madden and Thane, sitting beside Adam and Nox, talking about the headache of planning a wedding.
“It’s not too late for us to tie the knot in Vegas when we go next month,” Thane suggests, and Madden rolls his eyes. This is clearly a well-trodden argument between the men.
“I planned this damn wedding, and we’re not blowing it off.”
“Anything you want, sweetheart.” Thane kisses Madden on the side of the head and Madden smiles.
“You think I’ll ever find someone who’ll love me like that?” Clay asks with a sigh, clearly watching Madden and Thane as well.
“Absolutely. You’re a catch, dude.” I put my hand on his knee and give it a light squeeze to reassure him, but the gesture causes both of us to tense.
It’s not like I’ve ever shied away from touching Clay, but this feels different for some reason. Everything feels different lately.
“Thanks,” he says, licking his lips and shifting in his seat.
I pull my hand back and reach for my drink, taking a big gulp to chase away the awkward moment hanging in the air between us.
“Oh hey, I’ve been meaning to ask if you already planned something for Gigi’s birthday in two weeks?” Clay asks, instantly bringing us back into familiar territory.
“I had a few ideas, but I’m open to suggestions.”
“The Burke Museum has a butterfly dome exhibit going on right now. I thought that would be something she’d really like.”
“That’s perfect, she’d love that. She loves the dinosaur stuff there, too. You going to come with us?”
“Of course. Like I’d let you take all the credit for my favorite girl’s birthday?”
“Touché,” I laugh.