It had been three days, seven hours, and four minutes since Gabe kissed me. Not that I was counting…
I was counting.
That thought had me rolling over and burying my head in my pillow with a loud groan and a ridiculously goofy smile. We had been texting nonstop since he left Sherry’s Saturday night, but we hadn’t had a chance to see each other again. Just as I had that disappointing thought, my phone vibrated on my nightstand. I leisurely turned over and stretched my hand toward it. When I brought it up above my face, I smiled as I started reading the words. Unfortunately that smile turned into a grimace as I lost my grip on the phone and it fell directly on my forehead.
“Oomph. Owww. Dammit,” I muttered as I furiously rubbed the already tender spot. I picked the phone back up and cautiously held it above my chest.
Gabe: so I believe you owe me a date…
Me: Hmm… I suppose I do. What did you have in mind?
Gabe: can I cook you dinner at our place this Friday? Derek works till 1 AM.
Me: *blushing*
Gabe: lol I promise to be a complete gentleman. unless you don’t want me to be?
Me: I’ll have to get back to you on that ;)
“What the hell are you grinning at?”
“AHH!” I screamed. Naomi smirked and moved further into the room until she sat at the foot of my bed, cradling a cup of coffee. “Jesus, I didn’t even hear the door open.”
“Probably because you were too busy making do-me eyes at your phone.”
“Shut up,” I mumbled as I shoved my phone under my pillow.
“Hey, it’s not a bad thing.”
“What do you want?”
“You’re crabby when you’re getting some.”
“SHUT UP!” I yelled as I threw a pillow at her. She easily ducked it and started laughing as I sat up higher on the bed and laughed with her.
She nodded to the pillow hiding my phone, before taking a sip of coffee and handing me her cup. “So I’m going to the bar for lunch today, do you want to come with?”
I took a generous “sip,” trying to buy some time before I had to answer. When Gabe and I spoke on the phone last night he definitely mentioned working today, but I couldn’t remember if it was the lunch shift. If it wasn’t then we could meet up somewhere else, but if he was working then I could—
“He works eleven to four today.”
I slowly brought the cup down and frowned into it when I realized I drank almost half. “Am I that transparent?”
She shook her head slowly. “No, that’s just how it is at the beginning. Almost every thought you have revolves around that person.” She smiled and stood up. “So I’m guessing that’s a yes,” she said about lunch.
“I think it’s been a yes since the beginning.”
Derek and I were setting up for the lunch shift when Sam walked in. I hadn’t seen her since a couple days before Mom’s birthday, and even though we still talked on the phone, it had been strained.
“Hey.” She looked nervous as she walked over and gave Derek a tiny wave. His face lit up some as he returned it. That was kind of weird—
“I need to talk to you,” she said as she turned to me, drawing me out of my thoughts.
I frowned before putting down my rag and walking toward her. “Is everything all right?”
“Yes. No. Yes. I’m not sure.” She slumped forward and started rubbing her forehead with the heel of her hand.
“What happened?” I led her away, out of earshot.
“Have you talked to Dad since you’ve been back?”
I froze. “No,” I said slowly. “Why? What’s he done?”
“Nothing, but Gabe, you need to tell him that you’re not coming back. He’s making plans, and I know you think he doesn’t deserve it, but you need to have this discussion with him.”
“He won’t listen. He and Miranda are like a dog with a fucking bone.”
She nodded. “Yeah, I know. But you’re starting to build a new life now and you have people you care about here, yes?”
Only one face popped into my head, but yes, there were countless people I cared about.
“Right. So think about Dad’s business strategy—it’s always been about personal attacks. I don’t know what he’ll do, but I don’t think his strategy will change just because you’re his son.” I felt sick as the truth of her words sunk in. I didn’t know what he would do either, but he was a ruthless businessman. He didn’t get where he was by waiting around and hoping things worked out in his favor.
“I’ll take care of it.”
“How?”
“Christ, I don’t know. But I will.” I shook my head and lowered myself onto a chair nearby. “I don’t even understand why. Why me? There are tons of assistants and interns at that place that would be salivating at this offer. Why not give it to someone who wants it?”
She frowned before taking a seat across from me. “It’s all about power—he’s mad because he’s lost his power over you.” We sat in silence for a few moments before she got up. “Well, I just thought you should know…”
I stood up with her. “Do you want to stay for lunch?” Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Derek had moved closer, cleaning the tables around us. And I swore he paused and tilted his head our way at my question.
“No, I have to get going. I’m not supposed to leave school on my lunch, but I’ve become a rebel since you left.”
“Oh, I don’t doubt it,” I joked. She turned to leave when I called out her name.
“Yeah?”
“You’d tell me if he ever did anything to you, right?”
Her smile was sad when she shook her head. “The only thing he does is ignore me.” She walked out without another word.
When I turned back around Derek was frowning as he looked after my sister. Noticing my stare, he gave me a nervous smile before walking back toward the bar.
So. Weird.
We silently worked through the shift, which was blessedly busy and took my mind off my dad. It was just after two o’clock when the bar finally died down, allowing Derek and me to work on our side jobs.
“Today must be the day for visitors,” Derek said as he nodded his head over my shoulder. I turned around to see Alara and Naomi walking through the front door. For the first time in three hours, I had a reason to smile. They hadn’t noticed us yet; they were talking to Sadie, who was wildly tossing her hands around as she told a story. Alara was back in her usual get-up, a simple olive green sweater and black jeans tucked into short black boots. She was moving her bag higher on her shoulder when she finally noticed me staring. With a shy smile, she tapped Naomi’s shoulder and then pointed in our direction. They left Sadie a minute later and joined Derek and me at the bar where we were cleaning glasses.
“Hey,” Alara said as she stopped a few feet away.
“Hi.” I laughed at her deer-in-headlights expression before pulling her in for a quick kiss. When I leaned back, her demeanor softened and she relaxed into my side as Naomi looked on with a wide grin and Derek looked on with a scowl.
“Dude,” he said as looked between us. “You didn’t think to give me a heads-up?”
“Do you require payment for her too, asshole?” Naomi asked as she reached over and smacked the back of his head. We all laughed as Derek tried to dodge Naomi’s tiny fists.
“Are you guys staying?” I asked. I must have sounded embarrassingly enthusiastic because Derek and Naomi started laughing at me. But I didn’t care, especially when Alara gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before nodding her head. Totally fucking worth the embarrassment.
…
The next few days were uneventful. I left a message with my father’s secretary, who told me she would get back to me with an appointment time. Who the fuck has to make an appointment to see their own father? That alone almost made me cancel. But then I thought about Sam’s warning and I knew I couldn’t avoid him any longer.
Alara and I continued texting while Derek continued to mock me, and I really didn’t give two shits from a hairy rat’s ass. When Friday finally came, I couldn’t wait for seven o’clock. I was like a kid on a car ride to Disneyland. And if our kitchen clock could talk it would have said, Stop staring at me every ten minutes, time ain’t gonna move any faster, buddy.
Normally I relished my days off, but today I would have given anything to have a lunch shift and be distracted for five hours. So with no work to occupy myself until Alara came over, I headed to the store early to pick up all the ingredients I’d need for dinner. As I stood by the checkout, I went through everything in my head one more time until I was sure I had everything for an Italian dinner. In one of the random conversations we had, she mentioned how much she loved pretty much any type of Italian food. Was I trying to score some points? Absolutely. Was I ashamed? Not one damn bit.
By the time I got home and laid the groceries on the counter, Derek was just rolling out of bed and stumbling into the kitchen.
“Morning,” he mumbled.
“It’s almost two o’clock in the afternoon.”
He shrugged off my statement before yawning and waving his hand in the direction of the brown paper bags. “What’s all this?”
“I’m cooking dinner for Alara tonight. You still have to work, right? You won’t be around?”
“Yeah, which sucks because I have the mother of all hangovers and I’m on till one in the morning.” I nodded absentmindedly. “And you don’t even care…” He trailed off with a smirk and raised eyebrow.
“I’m just… I’m just nervous.”
He thought about making fun of me, I could see it in his eyes. But something in mine must have given away how truly nervous I was because he didn’t laugh or mock me. “What for?” he asked, with probably the most serious expression I’d ever seen on him.
“I don’t know what held her back before, but I just don’t want her to get caught up on it again.”
“And if she does?”
I shrugged. “I guess I’ll just have to wait like I did last time.” He nodded and gave me a huge smile before slapping me on the back and walking out of the room.
I didn’t start setting up until after Derek left. I didn’t need him to see any more of my ridiculousness—he already had plenty of ammo, and I didn’t think he would have been able to restrain himself from using it if he saw me putting out a table runner. And then there would have been the whole discussion on how I even knew what the hell a table runner was, so yeah… I waited until he left.
…
I was sitting on the couch nervously bouncing my legs when I heard two soft knocks echo through the apartment. Smiling, I jumped up and walked to the door. I didn’t even think about the fact that my quick response made it look like I was standing by the door waiting for her. That thought, along with any others, vanished as I pulled open the door and took her in from head to toe.
I never thought I’d be thankful for our inattentive management and their inability to change the half dozen light bulbs that had burnt out around our apartment. But right now I was extremely grateful. Instead of cringing at the usually blinding light and rushing her in the door, I stood there staring at her as the minimal lights provided a soft glow around her perfect appearance.
Her long blonde hair was down and curled in soft waves that were begging to be touched. And speaking of things begging to be touched… Her hair stopped just past her breasts, and my gaze was stuck there as my eyes devoured the skin around them. Her shoulders were bare and the top of her dress curved up around her breasts but dipped slightly between them, almost like the top of a heart. The material was tight like a second skin as it hugged and lifted her tits, almost like an offering. I subtly shifted as something else became tight, and I quickly looked down to the rest of her.
That really didn’t help much. The material that was tight at the top gave way and became flowy as it drifted down her stomach and stopped just above her knees. I had only seen her in a dress one other time, but it hadn’t felt right to ogle her because I knew that dress of Naomi’s made her uncomfortable. But this dress… this was made for her, and I could tell she was completely comfortable in it. So this time, I ogled. I ogled the crap out of her as I imagined her legs wrapped around my waist, her dress riding up to her waist as her flats fell to the floor.
I slowly made my way back to her face, noting how the dark blue color was a perfect contrast to her blonde hair and pale skin. I was almost scared to look at her face considering how dumbstruck her body had already made me, and when I got there I wasn’t surprised when my jaw dropped open. She kept her makeup light like usual, just darkened eyelashes and smooth skin with a light layer of lipstick. Alara looked like this all the time and she was always beautiful, but what absolutely floored me was the look she was giving me. Her smile was wide and bright as she enjoyed my undivided attention, and her eyes were just as hungry as they moved over my jeans and black T-shirt.
“You look really nice,” she said.
I shook my head as if to break a spell. “You look incredible, I mean you always look great. But…”
She laughed and touched her hair self-consciously. “It’s okay to say I look better than I usually do. I would hope so, I certainly tried a lot harder.”
“Well, you do. A word doesn’t exist for how pretty you look right now.” At that she blushed and looked down at her feet. I was still staring when her eyes lifted and met mine. With a small smile, she nodded behind me.
“So, can I come in?” she asked.
“Shit, shit… yeah.” I stepped back as she walked through, before I shut and locked the door behind her. “Okay, I promise I’m going to stop acting like a fifteen-year-old now.”
When there was no response I turned around and laughed at the face she was making, the same one I was making a minute ago. Fortunately it didn’t take her as long to snap out of it. She quickly closed her mouth and turned toward me. “Wow, this looks amazing,” she said as she gestured toward the table. In addition to the food, there were flowers and candles set up on the food runner, as well as a bottle of wine in a bucket of ice. I even had my phone out ready to play music. It was—
“Perfect,” she whispered like she could read my mind. I blew out a relieved breath as she continued. “Thank you.”
“It’s no big deal.” I shrugged and looked at the table. “You deserve it, I think you’re—”
I didn’t get a chance to finish as her soft hand wound around my neck and she brought my lips down to hers. My hands immediately went to her waist as I steadied her; the fabric felt smooth as I bunched it in my hands. Alara confidently licked my lips before plunging her tongue inside, causing both of us to moan when our tongues made contact. My hands were still fisting the material of her dress as I pushed them into her lower back and brought her body flush against mine. Her hands smoothed down my stomach until they rested above my waistband, and with excruciatingly slow movements she traced the top of my jeans around my hips until they met in the back. I jolted and pressed my body more firmly into hers at the skin-to-skin contact caused by her hands settling underneath my shirt. She slowly kneaded my lower back as we continued kissing like our lives depended on it. Abruptly she pulled back, and my hands fell away until they lay limp at my sides. Apart from our heavy pants, there was no sound for several minutes until Alara cleared her throat and spoke.
“That was supposed to be a quick thank you kiss, not an assault on your mouth.” Her neck and face were red as she ducked her head.
Smiling, I stepped forward to kiss her forehead and wrap my arms around her. “Please feel free to assault my mouth anytime you want. I’m also not opposed to you assaulting other body parts as well, just saying.”
Her light laughter floated through the apartment as her arms came around me and she laid her head on my chest. “I’ll take that into consideration.”
Ten minutes later we were sitting across from each other at Gabe and Derek’s kitchen table. I was still blown away that he did all this. When he first opened the door and looked at me, I knew I was doomed. I don’t like to need, want, or depend on things; I’ve found that expecting less also means hurting less. But the way he looked at me… I’d want that forever.
I took a bite of my garlic bread and looked at Gabe. “This is really good. Did you cook a lot growing up?”
He shook his head and finished swallowing before speaking. “Not really. My mom taught us a few things, some staples that she thought Sam and I had to learn, but other than that she always wanted to be the one cooking and taking care of us.”
“What about your dad? Where was he? I know you said he wasn’t around much…” I trailed off.
Gabe gave me a sad smile as he wiped his mouth and leaned back in his chair. “No, he wasn’t. He was always gone for work, but even when he wasn’t gone he never had much interest in us. My parents were only casually seeing each other when my mom got pregnant with me. I guess my grandparents had disliked my father instantly; they wanted their daughter with a ‘nice Jewish boy,’ as Mom put it. But she was never like that—she always wanted to be with someone she loved.” Gabe let out an exaggerated, humorless laugh. “But she also thought it was her duty to at least try to give me a normal family, so she married him when I was a baby. When I was younger his business had just started taking off so he was gone a lot, and by the time Sam was born he just wanted to reap all the benefits of his early success. He only really started becoming present in my life when I got to high school and he wanted me to work for him.” His eyes seemed far away as he looked over my shoulder. “I always hated the way he treated my mom, but when he started paying attention to me I was so happy I didn’t even think about it. I just started going along with everything and eventually I convinced myself I wanted all that.”
Gabe’s voice was laced with an unbearable amount of pain as he continued. “At the end, when it got really bad, my mom told me that she was sorry she didn’t try harder. Sorry she didn’t walk away from him and find someone who would have loved us like we deserved, not just when it suited his business.” He cleared his throat as he brought his eyes back to me. “I hated myself when she told me that. I hated that he was able to make me forget and I hated that it took losing her for me to see that.”
I reached across the table and took his hand in mind. “None of that was your fault.” He opened his mouth to protest, but I squeezed his hand and shook my head. “It wasn’t. It’s natural to want to please your parents, even if one of them is a complete asshat.” At that, he smiled and squeezed back before nodding.
“Okay, this really isn’t how I imagined this going. Isn’t the heavy stuff usually reserved for like the fifth or sixth date?”
I smiled and leaned back. “This doesn’t really feel like a first date, so I say anything goes.”
“Anything, huh?” He wiggled his eyebrows as he leaned forward and purposefully, hungrily ran his gaze over my breasts.
“Within reason.”
He smiled as we began digging into our food again. The track turned over as one of my favorite songs, “Poison & Wine,” began playing. My foot was tapping out a rhythm under the table, and I smiled when I looked over and saw Gabe’s fingers lightly tapping out the beat as well. A few minutes of comfortable silence passed before Gabe spoke.
“How do you know Derek and Naomi?”
“Naomi and I have gone to school together since second grade. But I think we were always more like sisters than friends.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because when we first met we absolutely hated each other.” I smiled, remembering the “fight” that had fueled our friendship. “She had just transferred and it was game day at school. We were playing Monopoly and we both wanted to be the banker. Names were called, pieces were thrown, and I think it even went as far as hair being pulled.”
He laughed before picking up his glass of wine. “I believe there is an unspoken rule that at least three fights must occur for the game of Monopoly to be considered played.”
“That sounds about right. Anyways, the teacher calmly explained that neither of us would be allowed to play and that we each had to sit in a corner and watch while we learned our lesson. We spent the entire hour glaring at each other. The teacher tried to get us to talk afterwards, but we refused and it went on like that for weeks.”
“What changed?”
“About a month later I heard her crying in the bathroom. I looked under the stall and saw her bright pink sneakers—I had been obsessing over them all day, so I knew it was Naomi. When I asked her if she was okay, she got dead quiet and pulled her legs up so I couldn’t see her shoes anymore. It was like she was trying to disappear.” I frowned remembering how hard she had tried to contain her sobs. At first I thought she was crying over something dumb, like maybe her mom forgot to put a Twinkie in her lunch. But the second her feet disappeared and the cries softened, I knew it wasn’t that. Somehow even my seven-year-old self understood that it was something serious, and I didn’t have the courage to ask her about it until years later, when it was already too late.
I shook my head clear and continued like there hadn’t been an awkward and unexplainable pause. “I left her alone at the time, but after that I always made sure to smile whenever I saw her. At first she was pretty suspicious, but eventually she started smiling back. A week later we were having lunch together, and we’ve been inseparable ever since.”
“What about Sherry? How’d you become friends with her?”
“Naomi and I had an intro class with her during our freshman year of college. She was pretty distant at first; I don’t think she wanted to be friends with anyone. But if you haven’t noticed, Naomi doesn’t like the word ‘no,’ and she definitely won’t go down without a fight. Sherry says she still doesn’t understand why we wanted to be friends with her when she was such a bitch.”
Gabe shrugged. “She seems like a really good friend to me.”
“She is. I don’t know why she doesn’t think so.”
We finished dinner, him drinking two more glasses of wine, and me sticking to just water like I promised Naomi. And I was relieved at how comfortable I was. We talked about everything and anything. He asked about my favorite flowers and candy, just like he promised he would. And I asked more about his childhood, trying to focus on memories that didn’t involve his father.
The dishes were clean in no time, and as we made our way to the couch I was surprised to find I wasn’t worried at all. When we stood by the sink, all those accidental grazes and innocent smiles seemed to be a kind of foreplay, and now all I really wanted was more. His gaze moved over my face and I could tell he was feeling the same way. But I couldn’t seem to find the words to get us from one place to the next. Everything in my head was coming out awkward and stupid and cheesy.
My debate over what to say quickly became irrelevant, because as soon as my butt hit the couch, my mouth was too busy doing other things.
…
I had just sat down when his hands weaved through my hair and he pulled me toward him. I startled and my hands immediately flew to his biceps in surprise. After a few soft kisses, I relaxed and smiled against his mouth before opening up to him. He wasted no time, and in seconds our tongues were slowly stroking and teasing one another. I moaned into his mouth as his fingers started rubbing slow circles throughout my hair, and by the time he reached my nape I was panting.
I had never felt this way before. So encompassed in my emotions that nothing else seemed to exist. The world felt like it began and ended in his kiss. I suddenly felt unsure of myself. Things were moving so fast and there was still so much he didn’t know, so much I couldn’t—
My racing mind was silenced as I suddenly found myself lying on my back. Without separating our lips, he quickly moved over me and settled between my open legs.
Oh, God, that felt good.
I swallowed back an embarrassing moan as he shuddered above me and started kissing me harder. Gabe continued kissing me until I couldn’t breathe and I was forced to rip my mouth away. Without missing a beat he moved to my neck, alternating between warm kisses and gentle bites. He slowly started rolling his hips into mine as his mouth reached my ear.
“Is this okay?” he asked. I was so enraptured I couldn’t answer; the yes in my head was so loud I would have sworn that a dead person all the way across the country could hear me. When he stopped and looked down at me, I whimpered. Legit whimpered. “Is this too fast?
“Yes. I mean no… I mean… yes, this is okay. No, it’s not too fast.” My face warmed at the lust-filled look he was giving me. I purposefully moved my hands around his neck and urged him back down. I tentatively lifted my hips and rubbed against him. And then there was no more hesitation; his hips rocked against me with such force that I shifted back a little. Grasping his cheeks, I brought his lips to mine as we found a steady rhythm. We were still fully dressed, and I probably should have been embarrassed by the fact that we were dry humping like teenagers. But as we continued our climb, I forgot all about any other feeling other than the pleasure.
He broke our kiss and lifted his head to stare into my eyes. I could see his arms shaking as he held himself above me and quickened his pace. The moans coming from me should have been embarrassing; they probably would have been if I weren’t so certain of my impending orgasm.
“Oh God, oh God, oh…” I chanted as my back arched and my nails dug into his biceps. It hit me fast and hard, and I shuddered as the tingles radiated throughout my body. Moments later Gabe stilled as he put his face into my neck and groaned. My face felt like it was on fire as I felt his rough jeans against the inside of my thighs, my dress bunched up around my waist revealing my damp panties. I couldn’t imagine how amazing it’d feel without his jeans in the way.
Several minutes and a dozen soft kisses later, he lifted his head and stared down at me with a soft smile on his face. “I think I should be embarrassed.”
I arched an eyebrow and smoothed my hands up his arms until they linked behind his neck. “Why? Is giving girls mind-blowing orgasms embarrassing?”
He laughed before giving me a quick peck. “No, but I should be able to last a little longer than that.”
I shrugged. “I take it as a compliment that you can’t.”
“Well don’t get used to it.” At my pout, he laughed and pulled me up until we were both sitting and adjusting our clothes. “I meant the quick part, not the orgasm part. That you should definitely get used to.”