Twenty-Three
Stana
My whole body is numb, and I don’t even want to think about what would have happened if I didn’t move quickly enough. If I had hidden somewhere in the apartment, they would have found me. I heard them searching the place, and I tried to stay as quiet as I could even though I was freezing.
When I didn’t hear them anymore, I continued to stay glued to my spot. I was afraid to go back inside in case they were still there waiting for me to come back. I was terrified of falling from the ledge too, but the fear I had of those men was worse.
I had woken up before they arrived and I was just about to call Jerick when I heard the door open. I knew it wasn’t him by the sound of the boots on the ground. He is never that loud. He’s silent and sneaky when he comes over, I never hear him make a sound until he slips under the covers with me. Hiding was the first thought that popped into my head, which leads me to my hiding place.
A shiver travels down my spine as I press into Jerick. It’s like I want to become one with his body, at least then I’d know I was protected. Where the hell did he go when those guys came in my apartment? How did they even get in? A million questions are running rampant through my head right now, but the only thing I can think of is that Jerick is the one holding me close to him.
I can feel how tense his body is as I hug my arms around his neck. I can’t bring myself to let him go even though I know that he won’t be more than a few inches away from me. His lap is a better spot than the seat next to him in the black car he just got in.
My fingers are numb, and there are dried tears and snot on my face. I can’t say a word, but I’m so damn thankful that Jerick is here, that he came back when he did.
“Ye think that it was planned?” Conaill says from the front seat. I can see him looking back at us every few minutes, but this is the first time he’s spoken since he brought the blanket.
“Aye,” is the only word that comes from Jerick. His hands are steadily running up and down my back, trying to soothe me the best he can.
“Who else would be stupid enough to help the bastard?” I bury my face into Jerick’s neck, and I can feel the tension pouring off of him. He doesn’t say anything for the longest time, but when he does, it sends a chill down my spine.
“Me Da, or me brother.” He blows out a breath before he continues. “If it were either of them, I won’t hesitate to put a bullet in either of their heads.” I flinch at his words, but he doesn’t acknowledge it. He just continues to run his hand up and down my back while I stay pressed into his body, trying to figure out what is going to happen next.
The rest of the car ride is silent, and I have no clue where we are heading. I want to ask, but every part of me is still numb. I don’t know if it’s from fear or if it’s because of how cold I still am.
As the car comes to a stop, I tuck my face into his neck, and he slowly gets us both out of the car without him having to let me go. He walks us through a door, and I just cling to him. I have no clue where we are, and part of me is afraid to look, in case I see the men from my apartment again.
They were there for me.
Dread fills my belly at the thought of more people trying to find me, and I feel my breathing start to quicken. I’m going to have another panic attack. I try to suck in as much air as I can, but it feels like someone is sitting on my chest, stealing the breath from me. As I start to hyperventilate, Jerick sets me on a table and forces me to look into his eyes.
“Look at me love. I need ye to breathe with me.” He starts taking deep breaths, and I try to mimic him, but it’s not helping. He says something over his shoulder to Conaill, but I don’t catch it. Everything is starting to blur, and it feels like my chest is on fire. The panic begins to fill me, and I swear that the guys from my apartment are back and they have guns.
One of them points the gun right at me, and I start to scream. “No! Please don’t!” I scream out. Arms wrap around me, and I’m being pulled into a body. Jerick’s scent surrounds me just as I feel something sharp prick my skin before everything starts to fade to black. My body goes slack in his arms, and I hear him murmuring something in my ear as I fall further into the darkness.
Opening my eyes, I feel like I’ve been hit by a semi-truck. Every part of my body is sore, and when I stretch, my hand hits something warm. Rolling over, I see Jerick laying on his side, almost like he was watching me. When I close my eyes again for a second, I remember everything that happened the night before.
I shiver involuntarily and curl up to Jerick. Just as I bury my face into his chest, his arms wrap around me and tighten. “Aye, love. Ye okay?” His voice is filled with sleep, and I hate that I woke him up.
“I’m okay,” I whisper back to him. He presses a kiss to my forehead before pulling me tighter to his body.
“Tomorrow I have a few of me lads helping me move ye out of yer apartment.” I feel my body stiffen and the pain is almost too much for me to handle right now. I whimper slightly, and he runs his hand down my back like he was doing last night as he calmed me down.
“Why am I moving? Where am I going?” I have so many more questions, but I know right now isn’t the time for them. I have no clue what is going on, and I have a feeling that he doesn’t want to tell me right now. The last thing I remember was…
“Ye are going to stay with me. Rory found me a new place. The paperwork is being drafted up, and we can move in over the weekend. I just don’t want to leave yer place the way it is and risk someone else trying to find ye.” I don’t respond to that because I honestly don’t know how.
He wants me to move in with him, or at least that’s what it just sounded like. “You want me to live with you.” I finally spit the words out.
I can feel his body rumble with silent laughter, and personally, I don’t find this amusing at all. I need some seriousness. I can’t take this. “Jerick,” I huff out, pulling away from him. He tightens his grip on me and pulls me back into his arms.
“Aye love, I want ye to live with me. Jest think I can wake up with ye in me arms every damn morning and fall asleep with ye every night. I can’t think of a better way to start and end me day.” He presses his lips against mine. As much as I want to pull away, I don’t. I don’t think I’d mind being able to fall asleep in his arms and wake to him every day either.
This is crazy. We don’t know each other that well, and after last night, I have a feeling just how right Max was about Jerick and his family. He threatened to put a bullet in his father and brother if they had anything to do with the men who broke in last night.
“What happened last night?” I had a panic attack, and then everything else went black. The next thing I knew, I was in this bed with Jerick.
“Ye were having another attack. I couldn’t get ye to calm down, so we gave ye something to help. It did the trick, and ye were able to calm down. I put ye to bed after that.” I frown because I don’t remember him putting me to bed. “Don’t worry, I was the only one in here when I put some clothes on ye.” I blush at the thought of someone else seeing me naked.
I still don’t think that I have a good body even though Jerick has told me many times that I am sexy and that he loves seeing me naked. I guess I am a bit self-conscious and I don’t want anyone else seeing me either. It’s different with him.
God, I’m starting to sound like a damn nutcase. I shake my head against his chest, and he sighs. “What’s wrong?” I take a deep breath, and I get a good whiff of his cologne and the smell that is all him.
“Living together is just soon, isn’t it?” I close my eyes and wait for his response.
“We are together every day already if we weren’t at me gaff, then we were at yers.” I think about that for a second, and I guess he’s right. We haven’t spent much time apart since the month after he started to drive me to work every day. One of us has stayed at the others, and mainly it’s been at my place.
“Is that how they found my apartment?” I really don’t want to think about those men anymore, but I’m afraid that if I don’t get answers, I’ll be having dreams about them coming to get me for the unforeseeable future. I can’t deal with that. My panic attacks will just get worse.
Instead of thinking about this anymore, I close my eyes and rest my cheek against his bare skin. He never releases me as I fall back asleep cuddled into his body, right where I want to be. Even if my mind doesn’t believe that I’m falling for him, my body does.
The pad of a finger tracing along my skin wakes me up a few hours later and when I finally open my eyes, Jerick is laying on his side next to me, his finger dragging up and down my skin in slow, lazy strokes.
“What time is it?” I ask rubbing my eyes with the palms of my hands. I look around the room when I’m done, and I’m amazed by it. It’s expertly decorated, and it seems more like a hotel than an actual place to live.
“It’s a little after noon,” he says in a quiet voice. “I didn’t want to wake ye up after the night ye had. Ye needed the rest.” I give him a quiet ‘thanks’ before his phone starts to ring. He takes a look at the screen before silencing it and setting it back on the bed next to him.
I reach for it and see that the contact reads ‘Da.' Instead of asking why he’s ignoring his own father, I lean forward and kiss his lips gently before pulling away again to look into his eyes. The usual mischievous glint is gone and in its place is frustration and worry.
“Are you okay?” I ask. I know it’s not something he will talk about, but I want him to know that I am here for him no matter what.
“Aye,” he answers before wrapping a hand behind my neck and pulling my mouth back down to his. He kisses me deeply, and I can’t help but moan in his mouth. It never fails that he can turn me on with just a simple kiss. I slightly rub my thighs together as I think about him putting his hand between my legs. I squirm a little more, and he rolls me over to my back, settling between my legs.
He doesn’t urge us to go any further than we currently are and I don’t force it either. Just having his mouth on mine right now makes me feel better than I have the last few hours.
Safe, right now I feel safe.