Thirty-Two
Jerick
One Month Later
Scrolling through me contacts, I stop on Stana’s, and I feel me body go cold. I fecking miss the shit out of her. I want so bad fer her to be with me.
The front door slams open with a loud bang and I crane me neck to see who the feck is coming in the house. A pregnant Cara comes around the corner, and I can tell her belly has grown since I last saw her a few weeks ago. I moved out of Conaill’s place and into the home the Rory got fer Stana and me before it all went to hell.
“Jerick!” A yell comes from the kitchen. Getting up from the couch, I make me way towards where I can hear Cara’s voice, and I stop short. She has her hands on her hips and a scowl on her face.
“What love?” I ask, staring at the phone that is sitting there.
“You need to see this,” she states, pulling out a barstool and taking a seat on it. Her belly touches the counter, and I can’t help but laugh at her. Every time any of us mention the stomach she’s getting she throws a damn fit, bitching that she’s getting fat.
“See what?” I ask, coming to stand next to her. She motions down to her phone, and I pick it up and look at the screen. My eyes widen when I see what the photo is. “Where did ye get this?” I choke out. She gives me a dirty look like she doesn’t believe that I don’t know. “Cara, just fecking tell me. Where did ye get this photo?”
She stares at me fer a second before she asks, “You really didn’t know someone was following her?” I shake my head no and look over at her. “There are more.” I slide my finger to the side and see picture after picture of Stana.
“Did you know?” Cara asks, a sad look coming over her features. I shake my head no and continue to stare at the photo I started on. Stana is standing in the store with a pregnancy test in her hand as she reads over the box. She’s pregnant. “We talked about pregnancy the last time I saw her, and she said that she couldn’t get pregnant. Maybe it’s just a false alarm?” I close me eyes as I listen to her.
Part of me feels terrified that I could possibly become a father. I know she won’t say anything to me after the way I treated her at Conaill’s. Setting Cara’s phone down, I walk around the counter to go and grab my phone from the living room.
As I grab me phone, it starts to ring in me hand. I see me Da’s number, and I hit the answer button and put it to me ear. “Aye, Da,” I say in greeting. I really don’t want to talk to him right now since I have more pressing matters to deal with. I need to find Stana and find out if she is in fact pregnant. Unless… I don’t finish that thought because I know she wouldn’t have jumped into the sack with someone right after I all but kicked her out.
She isn’t that type of lass. “I need ye and Liam to go down to the docks tonight.” I feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand to attention. That sounds fecking off. We don’t do work at the docks fer a few reasons. It’s not a place we can control, and we don’t like our odds if the guard ever caught onto our trails.
“Why the docks?” I ask, trying to think of a reason fer what he’s telling me.
“We got some information about a deal. I need me best lads on this. It could be a large score if everything goes to plan.”
“What’s the plan?” I question, needing more information than he’s providing.
“We might be heading into a new revenue source. So be prepared to try the merchandise.” I roll me eyes at his insinuation. There is no way in hell I’ll be trying any of his drugs or whatever it is he is trying to get us involved in this time. Liam is a loose cannon and will do anything to make a buck. I, on the other hand, don’t want anything to do with that shit. I just want to find Stana and ask her about being knocked up.
“Aye, Da. I’ll be there. Just text me the information.” I hang up before he can say anything else about me having to work with me brother. I hate the fecker and would rather not have to be in the same vicinity as him fer very long.
Once I get off the phone with me Da, I call Rory and ask how the feck he got the damn photos in the first place. “Aye,” he answers on the fourth ring.
“Cara is here. She was showing me a few pictures. How the hell did ye get them?” One thing Rory isn’t is a damn rat. He would never go against me. He’s been by me side fer as long as I can remember and he is one of me best friends.
“Jerick,” he starts; not giving me more information than he thinks is necessary. He’s more of the calm and collected in instances like this than I am and most times I act before I think about what the right reasoning would be.
“Don’t fecking Jerick me. How long have ye known?” I’m so fecking mad that I can feel my blood start to boil in me veins. I need the information, and I need it now.
“I don’t know who got the photos. Someone that I can’t trace sent them to me. We need to figure out who knows about her before they get leaked to the family, and they kill her. I would have told ye, but ye were so damn stubborn about her when shit went down that I didn’t want to add to the shit on yer plate. I know ye Jerick. Ye would have gone in and said some shit that she didn’t need to hear.” I sigh as I listen to him.
Part of me knows that he is right, but I don’t say it. I just continue to listen to him talk about how the photos were delivered to him by email. He goes on about how he tried to trace the IP address but came up blank on the damn thing.
“I want ye to keep trying to track it down. I want to know who sent them and I want the information now. I know it’s going to take some time, but I don’t know how long she’s going to have if that’s…” I trail off. I don’t know if I should assume that the kid is mine.
“Aye. I will get ye the info as soon as I get it.”
“Thanks, Rory,” I reply before adding, “Don’t be hard on her fer telling me.” A chuckle comes from the line, and I know he won’t be mad at her. He loves her more than anything and wouldn’t let something like this happen between them.
My mind starts to race, and I know that I need to go and find her. I need to make things right with her and beg her to come back to me. With things not as tense with the family, I will be able to take care of her and keep her hidden from them. They won’t understand, but I won’t leave her or me child out in this shitty world with nothing more than a tiny apartment and hardly any money.
Walking into me kitchen, I see Cara twiddling her thumbs together, just waiting to see what I am going to say to her about Stana. “I talked to Rory, and he’s working on trying to get information on the person who took these photos and sent them to him. He isn’t mad at ye either.”
She laughs at that. “I knew he wouldn’t be. If he were in your position, he would have wanted Stana to do the same thing. He would want to know that he was going to be a father.” I grin at her.
“Ye really think that she’s pregnant with me child?” Her eyes change almost like she is afraid to give me the straight answer.
“She could be, but I don’t know. She told me that she wasn’t able to have children, something about being in a horrible accident when she was younger. She said the doctor’s told her it was impossible to get pregnant. Maybe she has a friend or something…” She trails off as she tries to think of another explanation.
“It doesn’t matter. I know she wouldn’t have told me if she was pregnant, but seeing that photo, I have to find her and find out the truth.” Cara gives me a frown, and I know she doesn’t think I should go to her. She probably thinks that I should just leave well enough alone, but I can’t. I need to know. I can’t live wondering if I’m going to be a da.
“I’ll drop ye off at home,” I say as I grab me wallet, phone, and gun.
“Is it okay if I go with you? I mean, she might not want to talk to you because of how things ended, but she might talk to me.” She points down to her belly and shrugs. “I mean, we are kind of in the same boat.”
As much as I don’t want her to go with me, I know she has a point. Stana will want nothing to do with me. Cara will have a better chance at getting her to open the door and let her in than I would. “Ay, let’s go before I change me mind.”
She giggles and presses a kiss to me cheek before grabbing me hand and dragging me out of me place and towards me car.
The ride to the apartment that Stana used to rent is quick, and Cara and I spend the drive mainly in silence. “What are you going to say to her?” she asks, breaking through me thoughts of all things Stana and a galya baby.
“I don’t know,” I answer honestly. I have no idea what I’ll say to her, but I need to at least know if she’s knocked up with me child.
“I swear you guys can be so frustrating. If you don’t have anything nice to say, I suggest you figure it out before we go in there. She’ll be pissed if you just show up and act like a dick.” I roll me eyes at her. Does she really think that I will act like a dick right off the bat?
“I won’t be a dick,” I mutter as I pull into the apartment complex. She doesn’t know it, but I am getting Stana to come back with me. If she is pregnant, then I won’t leave her out in the open alone. I will do everything in me power to make sure she’s safe and protected at all times. I don’t care if she doesn’t want anything to do with me if that’s me child she will have no choice.
Parking, I wait for a second and stare up at the apartment that I know is hers. The lights are off, and I don’t see any movement in the windows. Getting out, I wait for Cara, and we walk towards the apartment in silence. She doesn’t say anything as I start to knock on the door and it feels like an eternity before I hear anything on the other side of the door.
“Stana?” Cara’s voice calls out softly through the door. “It’s me, Cara.” I hear footsteps as we wait and when the door opens, I suck in a breath.
She’s still just as beautiful as I remember. Her hair is pulled up in a ponytail, and she’s got dark circles under her eyes like she hasn’t been sleeping. I want so bad to reach out and touch her, but I hold back. I don’t want to spook her, so I just stand there staring at her.
Cara goes inside and wraps her arms around Stana, leaving Stana speechless. She doesn’t say a word about why we are there at her apartment, but she reluctantly lets us through the door. As I pass by her, I can smell the perfume that she always wears and me heart is in me throat.
“You look so cute,” Stana says, pulling back from Cara. Her eyes move to Cara’s belly before she puts her hand on her own stomach.
I watch her, and when she looks up, her hands fall away, and she turns to walk away from me. Her expression is harder than I remember from the timid lass I met months ago. “Stana,” I say, walking towards her and reaching a hand out. As soon as me fingers touch her skin, I feel as if I was burned.
“What Jerick?” She asks sounding exhausted.
“I want ye to come back with me,” I murmur coming closer to her. Me hand slides around her back, and her body goes stiff. She doesn’t move away from me, so I count that as a win.
“I can’t,” she whispers, turning away from me. She looks over to Cara for help, but Cara doesn’t do or say a word. She knows what me plan is and I’m sure Rory told her to stay out of our problems. That it didn’t concern her.
“Ye can love. I can provide fer ye.” A bitter laugh comes from her lips, and I hate that I’m the reason she’s become slightly cold.
“I don’t want anything from you Jerick. We don’t need anything. We will survive all on our own.” We. She said we.
“Is it…” I can’t even get the rest of the words out. I stare into her eyes as she struggles to decide if she is going to give me the truth or not. “Stana,” I say with a little more force. She rolls her shoulders before giving me a look that I’ve never seen from her before. She’s angry, angrier than I’ve ever seen and it makes me wonder how I could have turned her into someone like that. The lass that I am in love with, she doesn’t deserve to be bitter and angry. She deserves love and lots of it. That’s why I wrote her the note and gave her the cash. I wanted her to have a good life full of love and happiness, not anger and death.