Chapter Nineteen
There was something surreal for Maddie about being in her childhood bed with Alex. The double bed with the overstuffed, old fashioned mattress and squeaky springs was miniscule compared to the luxurious accommodations in Alex’s vacation home. Still, there was something very intimate about being so close to him in such close quarters.
She lay on her back. She was naked. The only light in the room came from the floodlights down at the barn. The orange glow seeped through the filmy white curtains and allowed her to see just the basics of Alex’s expression.
He was lying on his side next to her. The palm of his hand rested on her belly. The way he looked at her made her shiver in anticipation. Then he lowered his head to her breast and gently traced the outline of her nipple with his tongue. Pleasure thrummed in her body, and she clenched her hands in the sheets in order to lie still.
The sensation of his mouth on her breast grew more intense. He sucked hard, taking as much of her flesh into his mouth as he could. His other hand moved up her body and cupped the fullness of her other breast. She’d noticed of late that her nipples were getting more and more sensitive. It felt so good when Alex touched her. He licked and sucked at her breasts before using his fingertips to trace tiny circles around her hardened nipples. She arched her back and pressed herself closer to him.
One of his hands slid down her belly. He buried his fingers in the coarse hair between her legs and gave a gentle tug. She moaned and whimpered. There was an ache at her core, and she knew only one thing that would satisfy her.
“Please,” she begged. “I need you so badly, Alex.”
He made no move to cover her body with his. Instead, he gently spread her sex with his fingers and began to stroke her with slow, deliberate movements of his fingers. Each time he passed her clit she shuddered with need. One tiny brush of his fingers, and she would come. She knew it. Then he began to circle the sensitive nub. She felt the skin swell as the blood rushed to her groin. The sensations got stronger and stronger with each pass. Soon she was pushing her hips down into the mattress in an effort to make him touch her clit. She needed the direct pressure and the stimulation. She needed to climax so very badly.
“You want this badly, don’t you, sweetheart?” he crooned in her ear.
She could barely form the word. “Yes!”
“My cock is so hard for you. I’m going to sink that shaft deep inside you, and I’m going to come. Do you want that?”
***
HIS EROTIC WORDS painted a picture that made him just as desperate as they did her. Alex was almost insensible with the need to sink inside Maddie’s pussy. She was incredibly wet. Each time he touched her, just the sound of his fingers sliding through her slick folds was enough to entice him away from his self control. He placed his index finger atop the taut opening of her sex. He felt her quiver. Gently slipping his index finger into her channel, he rotated his hand until she was clenching against his intrusion so tightly that he could barely move his finger. The friction was delightful. He couldn’t wait to feel that intense sensation against the skin of his cock.
Alex loved being stretched out beside her. He enjoyed the feel of all her silky skin pressed against his. As he rolled to cover her body with his, he nestled his way between her legs. Her thighs parted to welcome him, and the tip of his cock nudged her opening. She soaked him almost instantly in her juices. Alex groaned as he savored the heat of her. He wouldn’t be able to take much more of this, but he wanted it to last as long as possible.
As though she were too impatient to wait, Maddie lifted her legs and wrapped them snugly around his waist. The tip of his cock caught against her opening. She gasped, her eyes flying wide open as she gazed at him with something akin to desperation. He pushed in just a little, and she did the rest. Her legs tightened, and his long, thick shaft penetrated her in a single thrust that left them both moaning with ecstasy.
“That’s what I want,” she panted. “Fuck me, Alex!”
Her plea pushed him over the edge. Backing out as far as her legs would allow, he thrust back in. The rhythm grew fast and hard. Each stroke was a jarring thrust that left him slamming his cock into her body. She met him eagerly each time. Her hands settled on his shoulders, and she clawed him with her nails as she ground her clit against his cock.
“I’m so close!” They were the only coherent words she seemed able to speak.
He could feel that she was close. Her pussy grew hotter and even wetter. The friction was almost unbearable, and he thought he might die of the intensity. Then he suddenly cried out in agony. Her inner muscles melted around his shaft as she came hard and fast. The undulating muscular contractions pushed him over the edge, and he thrust deeply in order to spill his seed inside her body. It was so good. He’d never felt anything better.
He was panting and his arms were shaking as he struggled to hold his own weight. Rolling quickly to one side, he groped for the covers and pulled a sheet over the quickly cooling sweat on their bodies.
She sighed and nuzzled his chest. “How is it that every single time with you is better than the last? That shouldn’t even be possible. At some point the pleasure would have to level out, right?”
He snorted. “You’re over thinking this.”
“Am I?”
“Yes.” He sniffed the warm floral scent of her hair and reveled in the feeling he got just from holding her. “This isn’t about the physical. Just screwing someone doesn’t give you the kind of feelings I have right now.”
“I don’t get it.”
He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Then go to sleep, my love, and we’ll puzzle it through some more in the morning.”
***
MADDIE COULDN’T SLEEP. Her brain was too busy trying to figure out what the man was trying to say without actually coming right out and saying it. Just screwing someone? Was he alluding to the fact that he felt like there was more than just a physical relationship between the two of them? That was rather exciting and frightening all at the same time.
Alex’s breathing was deep and even. He was obviously asleep. She carefully extracted herself from his embrace and slipped from the bed. The floor was cold. A shiver made her dance a bit as she reached for one of the quilts hanging on the rack in the corner. She wrapped the thick fabric around her body and then carefully eased her way out of the bedroom.
There was no noise in the upstairs hallway, but she could see a light glowing downstairs. Maddie padded her way down the creaky old steps. She carefully avoided the noisiest spots in her bare feet. When she made it to the living room, she saw Aunt Lori curled up in a chair, reading.
Aunt Lori looked up from her book. “Are you hungry? I can remember when your mother was pregnant with you, she ate all night and all day as if she was about to starve to death.”
“I could eat,” Maddie admitted. She watched her aunt get up and head for the kitchen. “Nobody ever talks about my mom.”
“She’s been gone a long time.” Aunt Lori pulled some hot chocolate mix from the pantry and started some water on the stove to boil. Then she put a plate of cookies on the table and gestured that Maddie should sit. “Sometimes I think we don’t talk about people who are gone simply because it hurts too much to remember. But that’s not fair to the ones left behind. I’m sorry for that.”
“Sometimes Daddy seems angry at Mama,” Maddie said as she settled in a chair at the table.
Aunt Lori poured a good measure of boiling water into two mugs and mixed in the cocoa powder. She began stirring each one. Her expression was thoughtful. Aunt Lori was Maddie’s father’s younger sister, but growing up she had been Maddie’s Mama’s best friend too. Sometimes Maddie forgot that Aunt Lori missed Mama as much as Maddie did.
“Why did she do it? Maddie whispered. “I’ve never understood. Why would she leave us like that?”
“Your mother wasn’t well, sweetie,” Aunt Lori murmured. She set the hot chocolate in front of Maddie. “Depression doesn’t make sense. When a person is depressed, the most horrible things become reasonable. And sometimes people in that situation truly believe that taking their life is for the best.”
“I don’t want to be like that,” Maddie whispered. “Jacey used to say that Mama killed herself to get away from Daddy, but I don’t believe that.”
“Your older sister is a foolish girl sometimes,” Aunt Lori agreed.
***
ALEX PRESSED HIS back against the wall and tried to process what he was hearing. So Maddie’s mother was dead by her own hand. Worse, the girls somehow feared that their mother had decided to kill herself because she was unhappy with their father? Talk about a tragedy!
He scooted a little closer to the opening of the kitchen door. He’d come through the dining room where the darkness hid him from the two women sitting together in the kitchen’s warm glow. He knew he should make his presence known, but he was afraid to do so.
“Your mother loved your father,” Lori told Maddie. “Don’t ever believe otherwise.”
Maddie had both of her hands pressed against her mug as if she were trying to soak up the heat. “How did she know?”
Lori gently reached over and touched Maddie’s shoulder. “Are you asking because you wish you had a tried and true way to figure out if you’re in love with Alex?”
“Sometimes I think there’s more between us,” Maddie explained. “I think that I might love him, or that he might love me. The chemistry is certainly there, but how do I know it’s the right decision? I don’t want to decide something just because of this baby. That would be so wrong. What if I wind up like Mama? I don’t want to do that to my kids!”
“You’ll know, Maddie. I promise.” Lori sat back in her chair and heaved a giant sigh. “Alex is a good man. He has a lot on his plate. I cannot even begin to imagine how he deals with that family situation he has going on. And honestly, any woman might look at that and think she didn’t want a part of it. But loving someone isn’t just about the good times. It’s about the tough times too. So maybe all of this is just a test to see if the two of you can work together.”
Alex leaned closer, peering at Maddie and trying to decipher her expression. He felt as if he were violating her privacy, eavesdropping like this. But the chances that she would have told him all of this on her own were very slim. Somehow he needed to make her realize that she and the baby were all that mattered to him.
Of course, he was going to have to figure that out for himself first.