Chapter Nine
Jessica
A few days later, once she came back from a late study group, Jessica was dealing with such heady feelings. She hadn’t been able to rest or sleep much. All her thoughts were of Brent, and, honestly, why wouldn’t they be?
After coming back from the zoo, and dinner, and… what had happened in the limo… and last night over the phone, Jessica was reeling. She was sore. Both from walking so much during the day, and in a good way after that sexy call. Even as she walked up to her apartment, she could feel his large, strong hand inside her. Little twitches fluttered between her legs, aftershocks of her first really intense orgasms. Never before had she ever felt so utterly undone, like she might fall to the floor the moment she stepped inside her living room and literally fall to pieces.
Instead, she just fell onto the sofa, bonelessly, and let out a deep sigh. For a long moment, she just lay there, her head spinning with wine and possibilities. From the way Brent talked, he was interested in more than just a fling. Did that make a difference? Could they move forward, without doing harm to Cara?
Jessica could only think of the scent of him, of how his hands moved over her body so expertly. She’d never been with a man like this before. She was a bit embarrassed by it, even though she was barely drinking age and knew others went longer, for far less reason, without experiencing sex with another person. In her case, it had nothing to do with ideology or religion and everything to do with opportunity and the lack thereof. Not a lot of chances to have a torrid affair in a library.
Well, that wasn’t exactly true. She knew there was a corner in the university library where people went to fool around. Jessica just hadn’t met anyone she was willing to make those moves with. It was easier with Brent, somehow. He was both experienced and willing, reassuring and dangerous.
It was easy to want him. So hard to tell him no.
***
On Monday, Jessica was restless. After spending most of her weekend with Brent, she felt the separation from him acutely. Also, she wouldn’t be coming over to spend time with Cara today, since the girl had school activities planned, so she took her laptop to the café around the corner to plan out things to do with Cara and review her lemur research.
Just as she was adding a few outdoor games to her list, her barista brought over her latte.
“Hey, Curly Sue.”
Jessica looked up and laughed. The barista, with her severe undercut, the top of which was dyed pink, sat in the chair next to her.
“Long time no latte,” Dana said. “How did the end of your semester turn out?”
“Ugh.” Jessica shook her head. “It was an avalanche of projects.”
“Same. I had to get approval on my senior project by the end of the semester, but since my aunt died and I had to go home to help her kids, I missed the deadline by a mile.”
“That sucks.”
Dana shrugged. “Dr. Wharton was pretty understanding. It’s nice to have teachers who understand school isn’t the only thing on our shoulders.”
“True. I hope I don’t have to test how my professors feel about things. They weren’t too impressed that I couldn’t land a summer internship.” Jessica picked up her latte and wrapped her fingers around the mug. “I recently landed an internship starting in the fall though. I’m really excited. It’s such an amazing opportunity, even if I have to wait.”
Dana rubbed her fingers around the piercings at the top of her left ear. “There you go. That’ll show them.”
“Tell me more about your project.” Jessica paused. “Unless you have to get back to work?”
“I kind of do. But I can hang in about an hour, if you want.”
“That’s good. I can finish up what I’m working on here, and then we can do lunch.”
An hour later, Jessica had compiled a decent-sized list of options for Cara and reread a few recent articles in the area of primatology, so Jessica and Dana packed up their things and walked down the street to find someplace for lunch. As they walked, Dana explained in detail the art installation she was planning to assemble at the university gallery, and Jessica did her best to comprehend what her friend would be doing and how it was art. Jessica had to admit she was very literal in the sense of art appreciation, but at least with Dana, she knew for a fact that the girl wasn’t pulling her audience’s leg.
Jessica sat down with her at the diner down the street and found herself shredding her napkin to ribbons. Dana wasn’t part of the sorority, but they had known one another since the two of them had suffered through an art history course in which the professor didn’t seem to understand PowerPoint.
“I got so much homework done while she was up there screwing around with that projector,” Jessica said.
“Right? I spent practically every class doing figure studies of all our classmates.” Dana chuckled. “It was like a double-duty art class for me. I could turn in my sketches for my drawing class.”
“You spend a lot of time with your cousins, right?” Jessica asked. “Could you give me some pointers on what kind of things you’d do with them to keep them active and engaged?”
“I mean, I have, but they’re fifteen and twelve. And they have their dad, still.”
“The girl I work with is about eleven. It’s not that different.”
“Are you looking for art stuff to do or outside stuff? My cousins mostly want to play video games.”
Jessica shook her head, feeling a bit proud. “No, she doesn’t play video games or watch TV much. She’s interested in so many different things, but mostly science and sports. She’s sweet, and very smart, and clever without being mean.”
“Sounds like a great kid.”
“Yeah, I adore her. I hope things get better for her soon. The kids at her school are pretty awful to her.”
“Unsurprisingly, I didn’t have a good time in school.” Dana grinned and picked up a fry. “I can suggest some pranks to pull on the little assholes.”
“Well, maybe as a last resort.” Jessica took a fry from Dana’s plate. “Do go on.”
***
“Oh, no. I’m only wearing a tank top.”
“Is that all? You’re really wandering around your apartment without underwear on?”
“Okay, you got me. I have a pair of panties on, too.” Jessica was perched on a stool in the kitchen. It was getting to be a bad habit, flirting and fooling around on the phone. The first time had been on Monday when she hadn’t come over… Now he sometimes called her in the middle of the day, or if she left the manor before Brent returned from work. Sometimes, she called him.
They’d managed to keep their hands off of one another in person… mostly. But the separation was a tease that only made their inevitable calls and lingering looks hotter.
“What color are they?”
Jessica licked Greek yogurt off her spoon. “Different colors. They have a broad orange-pink band along the top, and then hot pink and orange-pink kiss marks.”
“Oh, really?”
“Like when a girl puts on lipstick and lays one on your cheek?”
“That’s sounds… interesting. I’m imagining what those must look like on you.”
“They’re hipsters. That means they come down low, but the legs are cut flat across.”
“Can I see anything when you’re wearing them?”
“Hmm… Well, not from the front. In the back though…”
“You can see a bit?”
“Yeah, just a little.” Jessica caught herself giggling.
Brent let out a breath, like he had just run up a flight of stairs. “I think I need to see these to believe them.”
“Maybe you do.” Jessica traced a pattern on the counter. “What are you wearing? Is it a boxer day?”
“I wear dark-colored ones, thank you.”
“Hmm, not sure if that would make you Mr. Super Intimidating at all.”
“You caught me on the right day.” He paused, and she bit her lip, grinning. “Some days I’m not wearing any underwear at all.”
“Oh, my God!” Jessica was grateful no one was in the apartment to catch her playing with her hair.
“If you wanted, I could arrange for one of those days to be this week… Maybe next time you come over?”
“And what am I supposed to do with that?”
“You don’t have to do anything but enjoy knowing that I’m swinging free, just for you.”
Jessica laughed and rubbed her forehead. “Maybe I’ll let you guess whether I’m wearing anything the next time you see me.”
“This sounds like an interesting game. What do I win if I guess correctly?”
“Maybe…” Jessica thought for a moment. “If you guess wrong, you’ll have to wear something of my choosing the next time we go out.”
“And if I’m right?”
“Then I wear something you choose… any place you choose.”
A hand touched Jessica’s shoulder, and she nearly fell off her stool. She immediately put her phone down on the benchtop. “Oh, God! Daddy, you scared me!”
“Sorry about that, peanut.” Allen patted her back. “I thought I would’ve beat you here, so I just let myself in. Who are you talking to?”
Jessica felt her heart lodged in her throat. How much had he heard? “It’s just Dana. From class? We were just fooling around.” She picked up her phone again. “Sorry, I have to go. My dad’s here.”
“I heard. Have a good lunch.”
Jessica ended the call, feeling her stomach churn with guilt. She hated to lie to her father, even though he seemed to believe her. She excused herself to go get dressed properly.
She was wearing a lot more than she’d told Brent though. And she was being far more G-rated than she’d been in the privacy of her bedroom a few nights before. Good thing, too, because if she’d repeated the game from last time, and her father had heard it? Oh, damn it, her father would have gone total Chernobyl on the whole situation.
And the worst part is she’d deserve that reaction.
This was a dangerous game she was playing, and she was playing with two men she wouldn’t hurt for the world. Brent had his daughter to think of, of course, and her dad, well… He’d been so hurt when her mother had cheated. It had been a betrayal that had broken their family in half.
Honestly, Jessica didn’t know if her father had ever really recovered. And for Jessica, she knew she hadn’t forgiven her mother yet. She didn’t know if she could. So how could she risk hurting her father when he inevitably found out about their affair?
Jessica grabbed her purse and pulled her hair back. She was going to have to break off this thing with Brent before things got out of control. Having Dad overhear that… almost getting caught…
It knocked the thrill of the fantasy and her feelings right out of her.
***
Jessica’s determination held firm, and she came to the mansion the next day laden with supplies. Cara came home from school a little sulky, but the girl perked up when they took over the kitchen together, with Cecile’s permission, and started making a dessert together for after dinner.
Cara had no experience in the kitchen, so when Jessica gave her instructions for how to make and roll out the pastry, she listened with rapt attention. Of course, Jessica encouraged taste-testing.
Before they were done, flour covered the kitchen as well as their hair, but Cara was giggly and excited for how everything would turn out. Everything smelled wonderful.
“Dad’s never gonna believe I made this. Even Mom never cooked,” Cara said.
“Well, I don’t cook; I bake. That’s kind of unfortunate, since the former is more necessary to survival.” Jessica wiped her hands on her apron.
“That makes sense. Baking is more science than cooking.”
“That’s right! All reactions between the ingredients.” Jessica bobbed her head from side to side. “I could probably learn to cook, too, if I tried. My go-to dish is ramen.”
Cara grinned.
“No really – Asian soups are the best food in the world. Wonton soup, egg drop soup, and ramen, with the crinkly noodles, soft-boiled eggs, and thin cuts of meat. It’s really good.”
“Maybe some time we can make dinner for Dad,” Cara suggested.
“Maybe. Though I think what you wanna do right now is go upstairs and get cleaned up. Or he’s gonna think you’re what we baked.” Jessica held up her hand for a high five. “Up top, kiddo. We did it.”
Cara slapped her hand before bouncing out of the kitchen. Jessica pulled her hair out of her ponytail and rustled it, trying to minimize the saturation of whiteness in her brown hair.
“Ugh.” She caught sight of herself in the window and leaned forward to brush a streak of white off her cheek. At this rate, she might not be the one breaking things off.
Jessica played on her phone for a few minutes, then set it aside and bent over the oven to check on their dessert. While she wasn’t big on cooking, she would definitely do it more – if she had a kitchen like this. The oven door was glass, and she could check on the contents of the oven without opening it and letting out any heat.
At that moment, firm fingers pinched her behind, and she jumped up with a squeak.
“Brent!” She smacked his chest as he laughed.
“I couldn’t resist!” Brent held his hands up. “What have you been up to here?”
“We baked some apple tarts for after dinner.”
“We? As in Cara?”
Jessica pointed to him. “You have to save that expression – because she wanted to see the look on your face. She takes direction very well. I don’t think she’d want to be a professional chef, but it’s a good hobby. You know, to destress sometimes.”
“That’s excellent. Jessica, I don’t know what we’d do without you. You’re always looking out for Cara and coming up with ways for her to handle things just a little better.”
“I wasn’t that much different than her. And she’s an easy kid. She’s so open to trying everything.”
“I’m so grateful that you feel that way.”
Jessica wiped her cheek and smiled. It hurt a little, what she was about to say, but she had to say it.
“I really do. And that’s why… I mean, I think we need to…” Jessica took a breath. “We need to try to be very careful—”
“I couldn’t agree more. I’ve been a little sloppy, but I will do my very best to keep this under wraps. No more mistakes like the other day. No more calling from the office, definitely.”
“Well, yes, but also…”
Brent took both of her hands and smiled down at her as he squeezed them. Jessica melted at his touch.
You have to tell him.
Brent reached up to brush flour from her cheek. “Jessica, I want you to come away with me for the weekend. It’ll be just like Saturday night, only we’ll have several days all to ourselves.”
“I like having Cara around,” Jessica objected.
“Of course, but I know it concerns you that she might see us together and be upset.” Brent’s fingers carded through her hair. “I love spending time with you. I want to do more of it. This is the most alive I’ve felt since LeeAnne died.”
“Brent, I…” Jessica felt like she couldn’t breathe. She kept thinking about the night in the limo, the way her heart raced when they were on the phone, how it felt to simply try new things with him.
“Please come with me,” Brent pleaded softly.
Jessica wanted to open her mouth and tell him no. She wanted to tell him that this needed to stop before someone got hurt.
Instead, she found herself kissing him passionately. She stumbled back into the kitchen island, and he lifted her up onto it so he could cup her face in both hands and forcefully possess her lips.
The timer rang, and Jessica pulled away. She looked into his eyes merrily and gave his cheek a light smack.
“Save it for this weekend, buddy.”