Chapter 7: Haley
Sunday, April 26th
When I opened my blurry eyes to the unwelcome sight of the seedy motel room, I immediately closed them again, wishing the past thirty-two hours were nothing more than a nightmare. But the scratchy sheets and scent of stale cigarette smoke convinced me that I was, in fact, living a new reality. One without my comfy bed and morning runs with Knox and lively breakfasts with Theo. One that felt pretty freaking bleak at the moment.
Now wide awake, I urged myself to get a start on the day. Surprisingly, I passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow the night before. Apparently my recent problems sleeping had benefitted me this once, and after my adrenaline-filled day, I managed to get a full night of sleep.
Remembering my first task for the day, I was tempted to stay in the lumpy motel bed forever. Considering everything else going on, it should have been trivial, but just thinking about dyeing my hair was about to set off the waterworks once again. It’s better than chopping it all off, I grudgingly reminded myself.
I knew that I needed to change my look for the sake of my new identity. And since my dad made my hair look darker than usual in the photo ID he’d left in the safe deposit box, I decided to go with black. Forcing myself out of bed, I read the directions on the box of dye I’d picked up the night before and took one last long look in the mirror. Goodbye, dark reddish-brown.
After preparing and then applying the dye, I anxiously waited the requisite twenty-five minutes before rinsing and conditioning my hair. I combed through the wet strands, thankful to see that the black seemed to have turned out okay. Pausing for a moment to work up the nerve, I peered in the mirror again and sighed. Hello, “Jet Blue Black.”
My reflection was confusing, even though I was expecting the change. My eyes kept flickering back and forth between my hair and face, trying to make sense of my new appearance. It wasn’t that I looked that different. More that the black highlighted certain features that my natural color didn’t. My skin looked paler than usual, and my hazel eyes appeared brighter somehow.
I blow-dried my hair as straight as I could manage, but I knew I’d have to invest in a flat iron to achieve the desired look. To finish off my new, edgier image, I cut long bangs that dusted my eyebrows, added a thick line of black eyeliner, darkened my eyebrows with a pencil, and applied red lipstick. All-in-all, I was pleased with the result. I wouldn’t fool anyone who knew me well, but everyone else would at least need to take a second glance.
In fact, it almost reminded me of Kenzi—the raven-colored hair and red lips, at least. And, Kenzi naturally made me think of Theo. What would he, or any of the guys, think of this change? Although Theo loved my natural color, I thought he might appreciate this more dramatic look.
Since I had only driven about four hours the previous evening, I didn’t waste any time getting back on the road. I wasn’t looking forward to the six-hour trip but wanted to make it to Portland before dark so I could find someplace decent to stay. Well, relatively decent. I was paying in cash, which meant no luxurious chain hotels for me.
Although I was no longer an emotional mess, the long drive gave me way too much time to think about what, and who, I was leaving behind. I tried to focus on my plans for the immediate future, but there was only so much brainstorming I could do. Thankfully, much of the trip was scenic, and I was able to find a little enjoyment in admiring my surroundings.
When I finally reached the outskirts of Portland, I managed to muster a miniscule amount of excitement at the opportunity to explore a new city. At least Portland was known for being quirky and interesting. If I had a chance, there were several places I wanted to visit—Voodoo Doughnuts, Powell’s Books, and the Portland Rose Garden.
After driving aimlessly for a while, I spotted a motel that didn’t look too bad and pulled in. The neighborhood was run-down enough to be questionable but not overly scary. In that moment, I was grateful for my car’s dilapidated appearance; if it looked any nicer, I wasn’t sure it would still be in the lot come morning.
Walking into the lobby, I was relieved to find a guy about my age behind the front desk reading a comic book. When he saw me, he dropped the comic and stood clumsily. “May I help you?” he asked shyly, brushing his shaggy hair out of his face.
“Do you have any rooms available?” I asked with what I hoped was a winning smile.
“Yeah,” he stammered. “How many nights?”
“First, can you tell me if you accept cash? I don’t have a card.”
“Technically, we’re supposed to have a credit or debit card on file even if you pay cash.”
My smile fell. “Is there any way you can make an exception?” I pleaded. “I’ll even pay in advance.”
He looked around and, not seeing anyone lurking about, nodded. “Just don’t tell my boss.”
“I promise,” I said happily. “And I’ll take the room for five nights, please.” Although I wasn’t intending to commit to the room for that long, I didn’t know if I’d find him alone again and decided not to risk it. Fortunately, he only required payment for one night as a deposit, and I breathed a little easier. If the room ended up being horrid, I would cancel the reservation and get the heck out of there.
After he handed me the keys, I remembered what I had intended to ask before booking the room. “Do you happen to have a computer with internet access for guests to use?”
“Yeah. The business center is down that hall to the left. It’s not much, but there are two computers for you to choose from.”
“Thank you so much for your help. Have a nice evening,” I said, truly appreciative that he helped me out, even if only because he thought I was cute. Hopefully he wouldn’t get in trouble.
I spent the rest of the evening in the business center researching housing options. Since I assumed leasing an apartment was out of the question due to my lack of a job and rental and credit history, I explored alternatives. My original plan had been to find a hotel that offered long-term stays, but they were significantly more expensive than I expected. I jotted down a couple of the hotels in case I didn’t find anything else, then moved on.
A thorough Craigslist search revealed a number of options that I hadn’t previously considered. Apparently it was common for people to place an advertisement when they had a room for rent. I couldn’t imagine living in the same house as strangers, but some of the rentals were for a guest house or above-the-garage apartment, which didn’t sound too bad. I printed out the most promising ads and called it a night. Tomorrow I would check out the neighborhoods and start looking for a job. I can do this, I told myself for the hundredth time since leaving Santa Cruz. Only time would tell if I was right.