CHAPTER 32
Lex
Something had changed. That was obvious from the moment I woke up to find Theo in my bed. What hit me instantly wasn’t the fact that he was there—it was that he had stayed. After applying ice to my foot off and on for almost an hour, compressing my ankle with a wrap, and bringing me Motrin for any residual swelling, he still stayed last night.
I slipped on the only bathing suit I’d brought to LA. It wasn’t anything glamorous or sexy, though in that moment, I wished it were. It was just a scalloped black triangle bikini. I used one of my long dance shirts as a swim cover-up and headed downstairs. As I passed by the kitchen, I grabbed an apple before slipping out the back door to the patio.
Theo’s backyard was beautiful and private, with ivy spilling over aged brick walls and trees towering around the edge of the property. A large cabana sat on the far end of the water, and opposite it was a hot tub with a waterfall that plunged into the pool. As music spilled through the outdoor speakers, I smiled, knowing Theo had turned it on for me.
After shedding my cover-up, I tested the water with my toes. It was already warm from the morning sun, so I slipped into the water slowly and swam lap after lap, without trying to set a record. Instead, I focused on how the water felt as it glided against my skin. How my muscles worked against the water, making me feel weightless and lithe.
I became incredibly aware of my body when gravity was no longer a force against it. It was a lot like dancing—that freeing feeling that helps a dancer bend and twist and leap to music. If only I felt that way in life, but something always seemed to be holding me back.
I was half asleep under the cabana’s shade when I glanced through my sunglasses and saw a shirtless Theo approaching. I swallowed as I took in the golden tan hiding his normally fair complexion. He was naturally athletic, and for a dancer, that meant conditioning the entire body. Clearly the man went above and beyond. He was lean and had defined muscle without being too bulky.
It was nice to see him this way too, without the leather jacket, his jaw relaxed, shades pulled up on his head, hazel eyes—which appeared blue today—sparkling against the sky.
“Hey,” he said with a smile.
“Hey.” I smiled back. “All caught up with work?”
He shrugged. “As much as I can be on everyone’s day off.” He sat on the lounge chair next to me and reached for the sunblock on the side table. “I got the final stage setup from Vegas. We’ll have to make a few tweaks but nothing massive.”
“What’s that like?” I asked as he began rubbing lotion on his arms. “Putting on a huge show for someone like Winter?”
He let out a laugh. “A lot like putting a bunch of toddlers in a room with all the toys in the world at their fingertips and making them agree on which one they all have to play with.”
I giggled. “That sounds … interesting. And not fun at all.”
“Yeah, well, that’s when my charm and negotiation skills come into play.” He winked. “I win ’em over every time.”
“I’m sure you do.”
He grinned and reached his hand out. “Time to swim.”
“I already swam,” I whined while letting him pull me.
“But if I didn’t see it, did it really happen?”
Theo still hadn’t gotten into the water when I started to float on my back. Apparently when he said, “Time to swim,” what he really meant was that it was time for me to swim. He, on the other hand, just sat at the edge with his long legs daggling, his palms pressed into the red and yellow tile rim, and his shaded gaze angled at me.
“The water’s nice,” I called out.
“Is that an invite?” he asked, flirtation buried in his tone.
I laughed. “Do you need an invite to get in your own pool?”
“Not usually, no. But I can’t read you right now, Lex. I don’t know if I should come closer or stay away.”
My chest fluttered, and my mind reeled. “Come closer.” I was well aware of the risks involved with my invite. That just yesterday I’d been grinding on his lap in an abandoned parking lot. But after the rest of the day had played out, I wasn’t sure where we stood.
I heard a splash as Theo dove into the pool and proceeded to swim laps around me and under me. I was enamored by the way his dancer lines worked with the water, as though he was meant to swim too. I imagined Theo was good at a lot of things.
When he finally came up for air, he held onto the edge of the pool, an inquisitive look on his face. “How did you know you wanted to dance?”
His question was completely out of the blue but not an unusual one. Dancers loved telling stories about how they fell in love with moving to music. After all, it was what connected us, though our answers all varied. How did we find our place in the world when nothing else seemed to make sense? I’d probably answered the same question a hundred times, but I thought about it for a moment longer, wanting to give Theo more.
I pulled myself up beside him and rested my chin on my hands. “The hard parts felt easy, I guess. I’d wanted to dance since I was little. My parents were supportive of it then. You know, when it was an after-school activity that kept me out of the house a little longer and kept me in shape. Their support began to wane as I grew older. It confused me. If I was supposed to be ashamed of dancing, then why did I love it so much?”
“That’s so sad,” he said, and I heard the ripple in the water as he turned his body toward me.
I hated thinking about my parents and how I’d disappointed them, but what other choice was there? To conform to what they believed and miss out on a dream so many were too afraid to pursue? I could have been one of them. And I would have always known that I wasn’t complete.
“It’s sad, yeah, but that’s not even the worst part.” My eyes flickered to his, wondering if I should continue. His imploring eyes said yes. Besides, I still hadn’t answered his question.
“I was sixteen when I thought I was going to die.” I swallowed, my pulse racing through my veins. “I had just gotten my license and was driving home from Shane’s house at night. We didn’t live far from each other, just a few neighborhoods over, but it only takes a moment to change a life. I was stopped at a light when a truck took a corner too fast and swerved into me, head-on. I remember my head smashing into the window so hard, I just knew I was going to die.”
“Jesus,” Theo muttered.
“Life didn’t flash before my eyes like they say, but I do remember thinking that I would never be able to dance again. And that would have been the equivalent of death.”
The water rippled as he moved behind me and wrapped my body in his arms.
“I wasn’t hurt. A minor concussion, a few deep bruises, but that was it. The doctors said it was a miracle, and from the look of my car that got totaled in the accident, I believed them.”
“It wasn’t your time,” he said, his voice hoarse and his lips trailing the back of my neck.
“Do you believe that? That everyone has a time and a purpose?”
“To be honest, I haven’t thought about it much. But I believe you have a purpose, Lex. You have a gift.”
I couldn’t help smiling. “This coming from the guy who thought I was a lost cause from the moment he met me.”
He sighed against my back, causing a flutter in my chest. “I wasn’t capable of seeing you then. Not the way I do now.”
“How do you see me now?” I asked, my amusement waning.
His lips moved to my ear. “As the center of everything.”