CADEN

We talk until the flames die down about anything besides Chicago. I don’t notice at first that Mom and Dad are not sitting next to each other, that he is not looking at her, or that she’s very quiet. My siblings and I are loud enough to distract, but after a while I glance over to Mom, realizing she’s not said a word in a long time. My gaze darts to my father. He’s fiddling with his hands.

“Hey guys, I hate to say this, but let’s call it a night.” I tell my siblings. “I have to wake up early tomorrow and do some digging on the Internet. Find a place to live.”

Dad glances up. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of this. Kian moved to Chicago last year. Hang on.” Our family watches him rush upstairs to where he left his phone, hope and curiosity on everyone’s faces. As he strolls back, it’s to his ear. “Jocelyn, it’s me, your cousin Jason! Long time! How’ve you been? How’s your husband?” As he listens to her reply, Dad’s pale green eyes are fixed on me. He’s hoping he can help, and there’s excitement on his face at the prospect. “That’s great. I’m glad to hear you guys are well. So Jocelyn, my boy Caden has been transferred to a hospital in Chicago. He needs a place to stay. Your son Kian need a roommate by any chance? Even something temporary while Caden finds his way around?” Dad snaps his fingers and points at me. “He does?! Well that’s just great!!” Max walks over to prop a hand on my shoulder.

“Can you text me Kian’s number? And make a call to him for us? Thanks Joss, that means a lot. Seriously, I owe you one.” He pauses as he listens to her. “I know we’re family, but still! It’s a relief knowing he won’t be alone.”

Chatting with his cousin, he walks into the kitchen. They weren’t raised in the same city. Dad and his brothers were here in Atlanta while their cousins lived in Savannah, both tribes only seeing each other on big occasions mostly, like holidays and even some of those they missed. Then as everyone became adults with their own families they saw less of each other.

Lexi exclaims, “I hardly remember Kian. I don’t think I’ve seen him since I was 16 or something like that.”

Hunter teases her, “You remember exactly how old you were, because you had a crush on him.”

“I did not!”

“Yeah, you did.”

“He’s our second cousin, Hunter!”

Sam offers, “Some people still marry their first cousins.”

Max groans, “Samantha, do you always have to defend her? Even when she wants to marry one of our cousins?”

Sam ignores him. “Do you remember Kian, Mom?”

“Yes, though we haven’t seen him since he was a teenager. Handsome boy, though, which is no wonder since his mother is so beautiful. I’ve always liked Jocelyn. She’s a very dynamic woman, highly intelligent, huge heart.”

Dad returns and lays his phone on the back of the couch by Mom’s head, relieved gaze locked on me. “It turns out Kian has a three-bedroom he shares with two others guys—or did. He’s a graphic designer. Jocelyn tells me his friends are all designer types. He had a falling out with one of the roommates because the guy didn’t pay his rent three months in a row. Kian finally said enough. So fate is smiling on you, at least in this.”

Frowning, I look at my lap. “Maybe I’m supposed to be going there. I mean, what if I end up loving Chicago? It’s one of the best cities in our country, isn’t it?”

Nobody wants to agree.

Dad asks the room, “How about you guys all stay the night? Just like the old days.”

Without hesitation I answer, “I’m down for it.”

But Natalie is waiting for Max. Hunter has some mystery place he has to be. Samantha’s got an audition for a musical. “That’s why I was only eating salad tonight.” Lexi murmurs something about needing to get to bed early, too. Nobody calls her out for how obvious the lie is.

“I’ll stay over, Dad. It’s only me who matters here anyway.”

He laughs and shoves his hands in his pockets, classic Cocker move when we men have something on our minds that we don’t like.

My siblings and I hug each other goodbye as they gather their keys, jackets, purses.

“Taking your car with you, Caden?” Hunter asks.

“It’s still in the shop. Who knows. Haven’t thought about it yet.”

“I’ll buy it off of you.” He throws his keys in the air, catches them. “Then if you ever come back, you can buy it back. I heard they have a subway in Chicago.”

Dad corrects him, “They don’t call it the subway. It’s the Train. Or the name of the line.”

Hunter shrugs, “Okay. What do you think, Caden?”

“Yeah, I guess I could do that. Let me think on it.”

He nods and gives me one last hug before disappearing out the door.

Samantha hugs me extra hard. “If you fly there or drive there, I want to be here to say goodbye when you leave.”

Emotion twists in my chest as I squeeze her. “Deal.”

Lexi punches me. “I hate you for leaving.” She smiles from the corner of bright green eyes. “But then again I didn’t care for you while you were here either.”

I pull her in for a big hug and she sighs into me. “Jerk.”

The girls wave as they take off.

That leaves me and Max staring at each other.

“I feel like we’re saying goodbye now.”

I shove my hands in my pockets. “Yeah, we’re probably going to go through this feeling twice.”

He shoves his hands in his pockets. “This sucks, you know that.”

“Yep.”

“I could call Natalie. We could stay up and get drunk and pretend that mom and dad don’t know that we’re drinking. Just like old times.” We both throw a smirk over to our parents who are silently watching us. He was successful in his attempt to make them smile. I pull my hands free, and so does he. We give each other a bear hug and finish it off with a couple hard back-slaps.

“I’ll be here, there, or wherever you are when you take off, too,” Max promises me.

“You better be.”

As he heads to the door, he runs a hand through his dark hair, curly waves bouncing into place as he reaches for the doorknob. “It’s probably a good thing we don’t do a barbecue right now, so soon after Sofia’s wedding. All those Cockers crying again, I don’t think I could take it.” He winks at me and in that wink is the kid who I looked up to my whole life.

Around glowing embers my parents and I discuss the move. I agree to ask for the family’s help with packing and shipping whatever I need to take with me.

“I’ve got two days left, only. Third one I’m due for orientation, so I guess I need to fly. Have to head out the afternoon before so I can get a good night’s sleep before I show up to work the next day. That leaves me a day and a half.” Rubbing my face I add, “I know Wyatt and Nate will help. Nicholas too. I bet since the girls go to church they’ll know the best places we can donate furniture to. I don’t want Max to be stuck with my move after he told us he’s got this colorist fine-tuning his film.”

Dad argues, “He’ll want to be there.”

“I don’t know about that,” I chuckle. “He’s obsessed with that movie.”

“I really don’t understand how he got it into his head to tell my story. What is the big fascination?”

I could go into all the reasons but I know Dad’s just blowing off steam by getting irritated.

“You still not going to watch it?”

He makes a face like he’d rather chew on dog shit. “Are you kidding, Caden? I will never watch it. Remember, I lived that mess.”

Chuckling at his stubbornness I rise. “I’m going to bed. Galvanizing the troops tomorrow. It’s going to be Cockers for miles in my apartment. You know everyone’s going to show up as soon as they hear.”

Dad stands, too, but Mom stays put, asking me, “Breakfast? I’ll wake up as early as you want and make your favorite pancakes.”

“That’d be great. Five o’clock too early?”

“Anything you need.”

“You coming, Sarah?” Dad asks her.

“Not yet. I like watching the last bits of fire. I’ll snuff it out before I join you, though, don’t worry.”

“I wasn’t worried.” He gives her a peck on the lips and follows me upstairs. “Your blanket is probably dusty. Let me get you a new one.”