Making out with Kev was like finding a missing piece in a puzzle you thought you’d completed. How the hell had I missed that gap in my life for so long? And when I’d acknowledged it, I’d thought it unimportant?

I needed the man’s touch on me more than I could express. When he finally started to return the exploration by running his hands along my chest and around to my back, I surprised myself with how goddamn loud I moaned.

There was definitely something going on here I didn’t understand.

Kev pulled back for a second, and my lips were suddenly disappointingly cool. “You okay?” he murmured, those dark eyes intently fixed on mine.

I managed a smile. “I—I’m great,” I whispered. My tone faltered, though. I wasn’t even sure I believed it myself.

“What’s going on in here?” He tapped my temple gently with one long finger.

I sighed and closed my eyes for a second, trying to find words for it, and I failed. “I don’t know, but I need you. This.”

Kev smiled slightly, knowingly. “Have you heard of skin hunger?”

“Sounds like a horror movie. I don’t watch horror movies.”

That made Kev laugh, a musical sound that lifted my spirits right away. “No, it’s a concept. We as people need contact. That’s how we evolved. And in America, men don’t touch each other unless we’re,” he rolled his eyes, “gay. And even then, only when you’re dating another man. It’s why straight guys act like they so desperately need women—because they don’t get to be intimate with another person. Don’t get to touch someone, like this.”

His hand slipped up under my shirt, and even though it was sexual, the shiver of rightness that passed through me was far deeper than that. His words made sense. They tallied up with the feeling of completion in my chest.

“Oh,” I whispered. “Yeah. I am hungry.”

Kev cuddled close right away, swinging his leg over my lap and pressing himself into me, sliding his hands around my waist and burying his head in my shoulder.

Saying it felt good to hold him didn’t do justice to the neurons, or whatever they were, firing in my brain. I felt stronger somehow, even as I showed this vulnerability. “So sleeping with people is more than just sex,” I murmured.

“It can be,” he murmured. “If you’re not hugging and cuddling friends regularly… well, people deprived of contact start to feel isolated. Paranoid. On edge, like you’re craving something but you don’t know what. Sometimes people seek out addictive habits. But contact? It’s not a miracle cure, but I think it would stop a lot of bullshit if we just hugged our friends a little more often.”

I buried my nose in his shoulder. “Or fucked them?” I was hard now, my hands slipping under his shirt. I kept my touch light as I trailed my fingers up his back, indulging in the daydreams that had so distracted me during the boring conference calls this week.

“Please,” Kev whimpered. “Yes.”

“Bed, now,” I ordered. “Or I’m not gonna be able to walk.”

Kev grinned and peeled himself off my lap like he was in no great hurry. He took my hand immediately, as if sensing I didn’t want to break the contact between us, then said, “Which way?”

I jerked my chin toward the stairs and let him lead me through my own house. A parallel to the rest of life. I was only, what, nine years older? It still meant I’d been dating when he was still figuring out who he was.

God, I hoped he’d had the chance to do that before his parents told him it was all wrong and bad. They sounded like the scum of the earth. I preferred to fight with words—or better yet, diagrams—but I wanted to punch them in the face for letting a sweet, extraordinarily smart and kind young man like this slip away.

“You’re really amazing, you know that?” I murmured.

Kev half-smiled. “I’m not all amazing. For example, I can’t figure out which of these doors holds the prize.” He pretended to wave like a game-show host. “And behind one of them, a new car!” Just when I was about to laugh, he leaned in and kissed behind my ear. He flicked his tongue against sensitive skin and whispered, “And I wanna ride it all night.”

“Fuck,” I moaned, pressing him up against the hallway wall. I knocked one of my framed pictures—a print I’d bought in Singapore—askew, but I didn’t care.

Right here, I wanted to taste him and take him. Press him up against the wall and kiss him while I sank deep into him, his hard cock trapped between our stomachs. I wanted to be naked, bare skin against skin, his limbs wrapped around me. Goddamn, he was right. I wasn’t just skin hungry—I was starving.

He writhed against me, hitching a leg up and running it along the backs of my legs until he nearly got it up to my ass. I responded on pure instinct, grabbing his sexy little ass and taking a moment to enjoy squeezing it before hiking him up and off the ground.

“Oh,” Kev gasped into my ear, rolling his head back against the wall as I pressed him there. “You’re so fucking hard, baby. It’s hot to feel.”

“Yeah?” I grinned and kissed his throat. I was loving feeling his own hard-on against mine, even if they were way too confined right now.

My worries from not even ten minutes ago had vanished. I knew how to do this. I could make him feel good. Even if I didn’t last long, I could go down on him for as long as he wanted. I’d love to suck dick again.

As I kissed sensitive skin, he rolled his head left and then right to let me at him.

I wanted to suck on his skin, but it had been so damn long that I might go overboard and leave marks. I just nibbled, my fingernails digging into his skin with how much self-control I had to exercise.

“Suck harder,” he whispered. “I want you to. It’s been ages.”

For that, I was gonna need to get his shirt off. I growled and hitched him up against me, holding him firmly before I carried him to the bedroom. My ego got a rise out of hearing him gasp, feeling him wrap his arms and legs even tighter around me as he entrusted his weight to me.

When I gently set him upon the bed, he had to let go, but I was kneeling over him before either of us could forget the heat between us. I helped him sit up so I could yank his shirt off.

“Oh, I’ll leave you as many hickies as you want,” I promised with a grin. Though I meant it to be wolfish, it was more goofy. I felt like I was eighteen again, messing around and just enjoying what my body could do. Especially against and inside another man’s body.

“Good,” he giggled. “I always tried to avoid them, but I… I like how it feels.”

There. He’d told me something he liked. He always seemed to be neutral, asking me what I wanted, but never expressing his own preferences.

I was damn well going to leave him with more splotchy purple marks than a bingo card if that was what he wanted. But first, I knelt back to strip my own shirt off, cursing the buttons.

Kev laughed gently and helped, working his way up from the bottom far more efficiently.

By the time we met in the middle, Kev dropped his hands to wriggle out of his jeans. It took some doing, since they were the skinny kind that clung to his leggy frame, but watching him twist and thrust under me was no hardship.

Best of all, he had no underwear on, so his hard cock sprang straight up across his stomach when his jeans reached his thighs. He moaned as he worked them over his knees, using his toes to help tug them off. “Fucking things. Oh,” he laughed when he finally had them off, fishing condoms out of his pocket, and caught me watching.

I grinned. “What? I’m enjoying the show.” And I was. The first guy I’d seen naked in years? I was gonna savor every glimpse of his dusky pink nipples, the flushed thick shaft that gave away his excitement, and faintly visible, smooth abs. “You’re fucking hot as hell.”

“Th-Thanks,” Kev murmured, oddly shy for a moment. He looked away and then back at me, his smile growing. “You now?”

“Me what?” I pretended not to notice that my hard-on was throbbing in my jeans.

Kev answered by locking his legs around mine and flipping us over so he was on top. “I’ll show you.”

The adrenaline rush was incredible. “Oh, fuck,” I gasped, not even sure what he’d done there. I liked it, whatever it was.

“Mmm,” Kev winked. “That’s better.” He scooted down the bed, unbuckling my belt and taking his time working with the trouser button and zipper.

“Fucking hurry up,” I begged. I was beyond worrying about being pushy. I needed his hand around my shaft, and I needed it now.

“What’s the magic word?” he teased.

Damn it, he was in charge right now, and he knew it. I pouted at him, but that didn’t change his resolve. “Please,” I finally relented, all of two seconds later. “I need you, baby. I… I just… wow.”

Kev’s expression softened, and he kissed my chest gently before sliding down to help me fight my own trousers off. They came much easier than his jeans, at least, and when he was done, he was conveniently kneeling between my legs.

And looking straight at the line my hard cock made in my underwear.

“I want you to suck me,” I whispered. “Just for a minute. I won’t last long enough otherwise. Is that okay?”

Kev wiggled a condom between his fingers. “For tonight, we need this.”

“Cool,” I agreed easily. Whatever the price to feel that hot mouth around me. I appreciated that he was taking such good care of me—and himself. That kind of respect was hot, but completely in character for a guy like he’d proven himself to be already.

“Then I’d be delighted to.”

His words were formal but teasing, and there was no hint that he was hamming it up for my sake. I appreciated that. I might be desperate, but I didn’t want a pity fuck.

From the way it sounded, neither did he. We might just be the perfect match—at least for one night.

His lips pressed against my underwear, and my cock jolted with pleasure at the pressure. Through fabric, the touch was too soft to do anything useful, but hard enough to get my attention. “Yes,” I whimpered, but despite my begging, he took his time.

He kissed the whole length of my shaft before he eased my underwear down and ran a finger along the slick tip. “So turned on,” he whispered.

“Told you so,” I mumbled back. “Need you.”

The condom was tighter than I’d remembered, but it wasn’t enough to kill my desire for this man. Just seeing his slender, naked body perched above me was enough to keep me hard for days. Especially when I imagined being inside him in a few short moments, and then in another way not long afterward.

“How did I get so lucky?” he whispered, and my jaw dropped.

“I was just thinking that.”

Kev grinned. “About your big dick?”

That got me blushing. I knew I was on the bigger side of average—thick rather than some ridiculous double-digit length—but I hadn’t heard anyone say that to me in so many words.

“Your face is adorable,” Kev informed me with a soft giggle and then wrapped his lips around the tip of my cock. A wave of pleasure swept the response straight out of my mind, and all I could do was close my hands around his shoulders and beg for more.

Pressure and heat from tip to base, and best of all, the sight of my cock sliding between the pretty lips I’d admired from the first moment I saw him. Fuck, blowjobs were the best thing ever. How had I lived without them?

He took me in to the very base, and I felt my head touch the back of his throat.

“Fuck,” I gasped, scrabbling for grip in his hair. “You’re—oh, my God, that’s sexy!”

Kev moaned slightly and nodded his head as much as he could once, in a kind of thank you that made me giggle. It was still sexy, though, hearing his noises muffled by my dick.

Emboldened by Kev touching my fingers, encouraging me to grip his hair in my fist, I fucked his mouth slowly a few times, watching the slide of smooth, hard, sensitive skin between his lips. I whispered the first thought that came to mind. “I love everything about this view.” Then I pulled away, wanting to hold out longer. “I thought you were beautiful the moment you walked up to me at Friction. But if you keep that up, I’m gonna come way too quick.”

Kev grinned. “I’m glad you know your limits. We can have a lot more fun that way.”

“You like bottoming?” I asked, just to make sure. He’d never really said.

“Baby, I’d bottom for that dick seven days a week,” Kev groaned. “No, eight.”

If I hadn’t already been horny as hell for him, I sure would be now. “Then hurry up and get ready,” I gasped. “Lube on the bedside table.” With nobody else around my house, I didn’t need to hide it.

Kev grabbed it and sat back, sliding two slick fingers into himself a few times before he called it done.

“A-Are you sure?” My eyes widened. I’d never fucked anyone without a few minutes of fingering and pillow talk.

Kev just laughed at the expression on my face. “Most people have a little natural lube in there,” he informed me. “Some have lots of practice. And some just like it rough. I’ll let you guess which applies to me.”

“D, all of the above?” I grinned.

Kev gasped. “You’re a quick study.”

“Oh, I’ll study you any time you want,” I promised, winking. “You wanna ride me?”

Kev considered it for a moment before he smiled and shook his head. He rolled onto his back, his gaze meeting mine. “Like this.”

It was intimate—no question about it—and exactly what I needed. I considered thanking him, but that would be weird.

“Fuck, yeah,” I whispered. The other advantage—I could put his knees over my shoulders, and… Oh, yeah, I was gonna need to think about baseball, or I was just gonna embarrass myself.

I slid into position on my knees, scooting up close to him. My lips twitched as I tried not to make a pun, even to myself, about sliding into home base.

“What?” he murmured when he saw the look on my face.

I snorted with laughter, unable to help myself. “I’m hoping to squeeze it in high and tight.”

Kev laughed and slapped my ass. “Less baseball, more bouncing balls.”

I pressed myself against his entrance, glancing up one more time to make sure it was okay before I was sliding inside.

Fuck, it felt good. My brain almost blanked for a second at the squeeze—tighter than my hand could get without feeling painful. The rings of muscle around me slid down my shaft as I entered him, and both of us were breathing harshly all of a sudden.

“Y-You okay?” I reached for the lube to add more, but he smacked my hand away.

“Just fucking fine. This’ll get me off faster.”

I loved that he knew himself and what turned him on. That was endlessly attractive, and it made it so much easier for me to please him. “Okay. Let me know,” I murmured and kissed him before sliding his knees onto my shoulders.

When I had him arranged the way I wanted, bent in two under me, I paused to admire him for a moment before I started to thrust.

The bed creaked under us as skin slapped skin, my thighs trembling with pleasure within moments. I grabbed him as if I needed to stay grounded to keep from floating up into the sky with the ecstasy that was already coloring every burst of pleasure through me.

From his moans, Kev was enjoying it just as much, though I slowed down just to make sure. Before I could even ask, Kev grabbed my back, his nails digging in. “Yes, Charlie. Don’t stop,” he breathed out. “Fuck me until you can’t hold back anymore.”

I obeyed with everything I had, and for the first time since I could remember, I had no walls. No smartass comments. Nothing else to distract me from the intimacy of the two of us, as close together as it was possible to be, gasping into each other’s mouths between kisses.

Something in my chest shifted—not physically, but from the sensation, it might as well have been. It was a reminder that I needed to be loved, that need was okay. Good, even. Love had kept me sane in my darkest days, and it would once more.

The only problem was the same unshakable part of me which knew I wanted that not just from my friends, but from this man I was struggling not to make love to. However rough he wanted it, and however he wanted this relationship to go, it might not be enough to satisfy me.

Fuck. I wasn’t supposed to fall for him. Realizing this when our bodies were locked together in passion, orgasm sprinting up on me so much faster than I’d hoped, wasn’t ideal. But at least I had the chance to satiate myself now.

Like a starving man, I let his knees go and straddled him instead, pressing our bare torsos together and blanketing him with my weight. I needed to feel every inch of his skin pressed against mine, from head to toe.

Kev’s arms locked around my waist, and his lips pressed kisses along my collarbone and neck and cheeks. He was whispering to me. “Beautiful. You feel so good, baby. I love this. I’m so hot for you.”

This didn’t feel like standard patter he might give anyone. He was squirming under me, stroking himself, and part of me wanted to watch. The rest of me was perfectly happy to make him grind against my stomach as he came.

“I’m so close,” I moaned, pressing my face into his neck. “I need to come, baby.”

“Do it,” he whispered. “Come in me, my beautiful Charlie.”

I lost control, my hips breaking their smooth, hard rhythm now as I came. “Fuck!” I tilted my head back, gripping his shoulder and the headboard as I released every drop of my passion in shuddering thrusts.

I hadn’t even slid out before he came, too, clenching tightly around me and making me gasp in one last burst of pleasure. “Charlie!”

“Yeah, Kev,” I moaned, wanting to help him along. “Look at you. Fuck, you’re gorgeous!” Watching the strings of milky-white passion coat his stomach was better than any porn I’d ever seen.

Knowing I got him so close to the edge did wonders for me, and getting to watch his expression grow taut with pleasure? Fuck, yes.

I collapsed on him with a groaned laugh when the exertion finally made itself known. My body was weak and shuddery, and I didn’t trust my legs enough to try standing anytime soon.

“You good?” Kev murmured, sliding his hand up my chest.

“Yeah. Aren’t I supposed to ask that?” I grinned, rolling onto my side as I pulled the condom off. “Are you good?”

“Oh, I’m perfect,” Kev assured me with a jaunty grin, grabbing towels to clean up.

I looked at him, and suddenly I couldn’t look away. “I know.” He was so much more perfect than he even knew, and I didn’t know how else to express what was in my heart.

Silence fell for a few minutes while we stroked each other’s skin, cooling down together.

When Kev finally spoke, he murmured, “Whatcha thinking?”

“I don’t know how this conversation is supposed to go,” I laughed sheepishly. “But… us.”

Kev grinned. “I don’t know either. I’m horrible at dating. So, what do you want to do about us?”

I shook my head and smiled. He was doing that thing where he met other people’s needs, and I wasn’t sure if he knew it or not. “You first.”

Kev seemed surprised, but he settled down on his elbow and propped his chin on his fist. After a few moments of thought, I could see the decision cross his face before he ever said a word. No. Goddamn it, this was going to be an inconvenient crush, then.

“This would be some bad timing for a relationship. My life is… up in the air.”

I wanted to tell him that I didn’t care, that I’d put up with whatever the hell was going on in his life, but I had to respect his decision. I swallowed hard and nodded. “Yeah. So is mine, if I’m honest.” It was the right call and I knew it, but it didn’t make it any easier.

Kev smiled. “We’ll figure the future out when it comes,” he promised.

I knew damn well he wouldn’t want to be with me. He had too much else going on in his life, and even aside from that… he was young and pretty, and he probably wanted to play the field before he committed. It was all perfectly sensible.

So why the hell did it sound so romantic when he said that?

“Yeah,” I murmured, rolling over and putting an arm across him as I buried my face in the pillows. “We will.”