Chapter 3
"I hate the snow," Eunice groaned as we walked down the snow covered street.
She was clothed in mitten gloves, insulated leather boots, winter socks, ear muffs, a scarf and a hat. Her trim body adorned a fitted blue sweater with the collar popped out stylishly beneath her cropped blazer. Sigh! Not that I was looking any better but she looked like Snowy the Snowman with all the snowflakes that hanged all over her.
Cold smoke exited our mouths as we talked. The snow seemed to get heavier in the evenings.
"I am not even sure if he has a girlfriend or not. What if he has one─ probably a cute fleshy brunette chic with an elaborate persona?"
I blew more cold smoke from my mouth into my hands and rubbed my glove covered palms together.
Eunice giggled. My responding chuckle sounded more like a titter.
"I don't think he has one. If he did, he won't be here drooling over you."
"He is not drooling; he is just being a good friend. Besides, I have not even seen him in so long."
She sighed and shook her head.
“I sure know he fancies you, and you like him more than the two of you are willing to admit. You have gotten so much close… as friends, that you simply cannot fathom the both of you being romantically involved. I would give anything for the kind of commitment he shows towards you.”
There was a pile of logs around the corner, buried in more than fifteen inches of snow. We walked towards it and sat, not minding the ice layers atop it. It greeted our asses with utmost frozen delight. Ah! Heaven!
“Well, I guess we will just have to wait and see how things turn out,” I replied after we took our seats.
Everybody seemed to be getting ready for Christmas. I could see people dragging small trees they had got for the Yuletide; families did their shopping and offloaded all they had bought into their various houses. I did not even have a Christmas tree, or new lights for decorations. Some kids stood under a withered tree, holding hands and listened to a fellow in leather pants and red hat. He appeared to be telling tales about the Santa's dwarfs then something about gingerbread man or some other nonexistent Christmas fallacy. The kids listened in awe and together screamed joyfully when he was done.
"More... More... More...." they chorused.
Then the lanky looking man rubbed his fingers together and the kids eagerly brought whatever money they had on them and dropped it in his little brown bag. I could not believe he was actually extorting these kids over some nine hundred thousand years old stories.
"We got special invites to the Portman’s Christmas party tomorrow." Eunice was staring at me, waiting for a reaction.
"Tomorrow is Christmas eve already? Shit."
"Yes. I told them we would be very glad to grace the occasion." Eunice was patronizing me.
"Did we get special invites...? Or you requested for the invites? I know you and Jamie Portman are pretty close." Jamie Portman is Harry Portman’s son.
"There’s going to be fruitcakes, gingerbread, eggnogs, a Carol..." she snubbed my question.
"I don't have a choice. Do I?"
"Not if I'm alive!" She smiled.
**
"I have decided to sleep in my house today," I told Eunice.
"That's good for you. At least my food should last longer now."
"I don't eat as much as you, fatty," I fought back.
And I was right, plus she had more layers of flesh than I did. But her crumpled up dressing gave away no skin for me to make an example of, save her face. I schemed for ways to hit at her.
I was happy. My sense of humor was returning. Now all I had to do was to exorcise my demons. And I knew just where to start.
After Eunice and I parted that evening (but not before she promised to come see me the next morning), I went over to the Uncle Richard's house.
As I entered the gates, my memories started to swing between fond ones and the most recent awful experience. All that soon passed when I saw Uncle Richard and the boys from afar. The housekeeper, Stella was also beaming with smiles and the little dog, Wally, wagged its tail. They had worn a kind of think garment over it, and it looked absolutely beautiful. The boys were happy to see me. I had spoken to Nicholas on phone a day before; Uncle Richard too.
**
"How are you doing? How are you holding up?" Uncle Richard asked me when we were alone in his study.
"I'm okay... doing just fine… although I have had better days."
I had always been closer to Uncle Richard than my parents. I could share my feelings with him about things that bothered me and he always gave comforting advice.
The heat in the house was so high that I barely felt any cold. I even had to take off two layers of my clothing, leaving me with just my long sleeve cotton shirt and denim pants.
Uncle Richard was looking at me with care, like I was a kid; vulnerable and susceptible. Well, I could not say that I wasn't. My life had just shattered right before my very eyes, and the eyes of all my friends that had come for the party.
"I need you to do something for me, Miranda"
"Sure, whatever it is."
"I need you to see someone."
"Someone?" I asked, puzzled.
"Yes. Someone you could talk to─ a professional."
"Like a psychiatrist?"
"No... a counselor… a psychologist."
"Why?"
"I know you think that you are moving on fine. But I can tell you, as an experienced man. It isn't that easy. I do not want you to break down all of a sudden. I have somebody. He is a friend."
"A friend?"
"Well, he worked with an old friend of mine. He is in his early thirties, but quite experienced in the job."
"Okay Uncle Richard. I promise I will see him."
"Promise?"
"Yes Uncle Richard, I promise to talk to him after Christmas. Maybe I will do that on the 27th or the 28th."
"Here, let me give you his number. I just want to make sure you are okay, Miranda"
Leaving Uncle Richard's house that night, I made up my mind to burn anything that had a connection to Nate, including pictures, notes and jewelry he bought me. I reached home that night and set it all on fire outside, near my garbage can. I watched as the snow melted under the brightly glowing fire. At that moment, something left my heart. Something that had been holding me back or at least I felt it did. I hid memories of Nate in a dark place in my heart, never to revisit.