CLARE
I wished I could say I regretted that night, those few moments, with Dale.
I also wished I could say there wasn’t a repeat performance, but there had been. A few, in fact. Three weeks after the first time, with his mother still in town, he’d snuck out three more times, being intoxicated only the first two. What he told himself afterward, how he justified his actions, I didn’t know.
I just knew what I told myself—we were adults and could do as we pleased.
I also told myself I didn’t care that we never talked, or that it was like a hit-and-run each time.
Or that I absolutely didn’t long for him to hold me close, kiss the side of my head, linger for just another minute before he left.
Frankly, the thought of his visits preoccupied my brain, even when I tried to work. I’d opted to work from home, my mind on nothing but the way Dale had claimed my body yet again last night.
Lacrosse sat next to me, her tail wagging as she waited for me to decide whether I would try to focus or take her for a walk instead.
When there was a knock on the door, Lacrosse bounded over, the prospect of someone playing with her too exciting to remind her that she was supposed to keep watch over me.
“You’re a sucky guard dog,” I muttered as I got up and opened the door to a woman I’d seen around but had never spoken to—Dale’s mother.
My cheeks heated as I mentally went over my house and how presentable it would be if I asked her in.
“Miss Delaney, I’m—”
“I know,” I interrupted. “Do you want to come in, Mrs. Harris?” I stepped aside, hoping she wouldn’t look around too closely. She nodded, pausing to lean down and scratch Lacrosse behind the ears.
“I heard so much about you, pretty puppy. My granddaughter is absolutely in love with you,” she cooed, and I couldn’t help but smile as I led her to the living room.
“I’m sorry there’s dog hair all over. Lacrosse doesn’t understand that the couch is not for her.” Truthfully, I allowed her on there and didn’t have the heart to tell her to move whenever she snuggled up next to me.
Dale’s mother laughed. “No worries, child. It’s her home, so I need to adapt.” She sat and winked at me. “Besides, if I’m covered in her hair, maybe she’ll accept me as one of her pack.”
I shook my head, smiling, then remembered my manners. “Can I offer you anything? I was about to make myself some tea.”
She shook her head. “Thank you. I’m fine for now, but I’ll wait until you’re back with yours.”
I debated about going to the kitchen, then decided against it.
“It’s not that pressing. It would’ve just been something to do besides work.” I sat on the armchair across from her.
“What do you do?”
I shrugged. “Office work. Invoices, account checking, paying bills, answering emails, typing out letters. Those kinds of things. There aren’t too many people in the office currently, so it’s slow and I can work from home a couple times a week. I won’t lie, though. I’m more productive when I’m at the office.” I winked, making her smirk.
“I know that feeling.” She turned serious then. “I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m here.”
I nodded. “I won’t lie. It’s unexpected.”
Mrs. Harris clasped her hands together in her lap. “Besides the fact that Sally is at daycare playing and Dale’s at work carrying God-knows-what to God-knows-where causing me to be bored, I’m curious. Did you meet Jacky before she was taken from Dale?”
Ah, his wife. “I didn’t. I moved here after everything happened. Dale and I don’t exactly see eye to eye, so I don’t know anything about her.
Except that it had been brutal. The whole neighborhood knew that.
Her eyes reminded me of Dale’s, his just as warm as hers, and her hair was white as a sheet. I still couldn’t put my finger on how old she was because her face seemed youthful, her eyes alight with curiosity.
“He’s been lonely ever since she died. They’d been high school sweethearts. I don’t think Dale ever knew what true love was.”
I choked on air, surprised to hear his mother say something like that, especially to a stranger. “The way it sounded, they were very much in love. Besides, you can find love in high school. Lifelong love, too.” I hadn’t, but I heard it happened.
“Miss Delaney—”
“Call me Clare. You calling me ‘Miss’ makes me feel older than I already am,” I replied. I had no idea why my biological clock ticked so loudly lately, but it did. It was almost all I could hear some days.
“You’re still young, Clare, and the fact that you’re here without your own family tells me you, too, have never really loved. Let me be blunt.” I wondered how much more blunt she could get. After all, she didn’t exactly hold back with her opinions…about anything. “Dale knows he needs someone in his life, but lately, I have a feeling he’s compensating that need with one-night stands, and that’s…” She sighed. “I don’t know. I don’t think that’s the solution to his problem. However, I’ve seen the way he sometimes looks over here, heard the way he speaks about you and his daughter. You like Sally, don’t you?”
“Mrs. Harris, let me be frank. If you came here on a matchmaking mission, you’re way off. Your son and I mostly scream at each other…” Or fuck each other’s brains out. “As much as I adore Sally, I dislike her father. He’s condescending and rude, not to mention an asshole most of the time. Is he handsome? Very much so, but his love life is none of my business. Trust me, I don’t want it to be, either.”
Funnily enough, the thought had my heart thudding angrily against my ribcage, hating to think about all the women he might pick up in bars the moment he decided our little rendezvous weren’t enough.
His mother laughed, then shook her head. “I’m not here to match you and him because, honestly, if this went south, there wouldn’t be anyone to help him with Sally, and I don’t want that. I’m just here to ask you if maybe you’d be willing to babysit her should he start dating seriously.”
I was stunned into silence. Sitting here, watching his daughter, while he tried to find a woman to spend his life with? A woman who’d get to kiss his cheek after he fell into bed, exhausted from the day or maybe buzzed from a few beers? Someone who’d get to see him first thing in the morning when the lines on his face were still relaxed because nothing had added to his stress yet?
Does he smile in his sleep? Is he a hugger?
My breath froze in my chest at those thoughts because, by god, I wanted to experience that.
Holy shit! I’m falling for Dale Harris, and not just in a get-him-naked way.
I rubbed my chest, suddenly hurting at the thought of him showing up one day, relaxed, smiling, introducing me to his new girlfriend.
Leaning back, surprised and shocked at my own revelation in my head, I realized his mother waited for an answer.
“I’ll watch her whenever he needs it,” I heard myself say, noticing a weird expression cross her face before a little smile lifted the corner of her mouth.
“Are you okay, dear? You look a little pale.”
I nodded, shaking off the feeling of wanting more from Dale Harris than just his body, and gave her a small smile. “I’ve been exhausted lately, and my stomach’s acting up, so I’m sorry if I’m not the best partner for conversation.”
It wasn’t a lie. I couldn’t remember the last time I had coffee because that unsettled my stomach even more. It wasn’t so bad that I had was constantly in the bathroom, but I didn’t exactly feel peachy most of the time, either. My doctor had told me there was a stomach bug going around and that tea and low-fat food would cure it soon, so that was what I was doing.
“No worries. I settled what I came here for. Thank you for being kind and a good neighbor, even though you and Dale don’t like each other.” She stood, and I followed. “Now all I need to do is convince my son to find himself a good woman. One he won’t be able to stop touching, and one who’s preferably smart rather than a dumb blonde.”
I nodded, unsure of what to say, and walked her to the door, wondering where Lacrosse had gone. I wasn’t too worried because she loved hiding in the house, usually falling asleep somewhere. I’d find her eventually.
Dale’s mother hesitated in the door, turning back to me. “And, Clare, just to be clear. I loved Jacky. She was an amazing woman and a great mother. However, I know she and Dale weren’t as in love as I’d have wanted. Even before Sally was born, I think she partly regretted having committed so early. She would’ve been the right woman for another man. For Dale, she was his first and only. He really doesn’t know what love is. I’m not being mean, just frank.”
I cleared my throat. “You’re his mother. I think if someone knows things like that, it’s definitely you. I’m sorry your son didn’t have the happiness he deserved.” And I meant it. If what she said were true, Dale never had the chance to reach his true potential. I was sure of it.
“I wish she hadn’t died. She deserved to find true happiness just as much as Dale does, but I haven’t given up hope yet.” Her smile was weak, showing that she had loved her daughter-in-law in her own way.
I squeezed her shoulder briefly. “Thank you for dropping by. If you are able to convince your son to date, I’ll definitely take care of Sally.”
I looked forward to that, but knew I’d still hate every second simply because now that I knew I liked Dale, I couldn’t stomach the thought of him talking to someone else.
I was a nutcase. Maybe I should start therapy. After all, who the hell fell for their asshole neighbor?