I had the most peaceful sleep I have had in too long. I open my eyes and I take in my new surroundings. I see a tray sitting on the night stand and my stomach growls and lets me know I need to feed it. I sit on the side of the bed and let my eyes focus properly.

I pick the sandwich up and take a bite and it is delicious. It doesn’t take me long to finish it and the bowl of soup, which was cold, but I have tasted worse than cold soup. I get up and go to look out the window. Lil was right, it is a beautiful view of the backyard.

I see it is dusk outside. I have slept the entire day away. I never sleep this long. Even at night I usually wake up many times. I have to say this bed is way more comfortable than the daybed I am used to. I need to get down stairs and make sure there isn’t anything for me to help with. I stand to go, but I hear a soft knock at the door and I go and open it. Con is standing there. I have to say it is a surprise to me. He hasn’t said much to me since the morning I woke up in the hospital. I step back and open the door wider, so he can get in and then he shuts the door and faces me.

“Look, I understand this is all new to you and you’re not sure about us. I get that. It hasn’t been that long ago I was in your shoes. Not knowing who you should trust or if you should run. If you’ll just give us a chance, you’ll have a family who will always be there for you. Shine wants you as his. You don’t understand that right now, but you will. Just understand that when he says forever, he means it. Don’t hurt him. If you can’t give him your all, then tell him that up front. Don’t string him along. He looks like a big ass, but you could easily hurt him. Try not to. He’s my best friend.” He doesn’t wait for a response. He turns and leaves me alone.

Shine was serious about me being his. I don’t know how I feel about that. I would never purposely hurt anyone, ever. I’ve never been in a relationship, but the more I think about it, the more I like the idea. I want to get to know him better. He is very sexy, and well, I’m just me. I don’t know how he could want me, but it is like I am drawn to him. I can do this.

I have wanted a big family and now I have my chance. I want to belong. I have made my mind up. As far as Shine is concerned, I will let nature take its course. If it is meant to be it will happen. One of Grammy’s rules in life, if it is meant to be it will happen. No time like the present.

I pick the tray up and make my way downstairs. The house is quiet. I decide to go down the back way, figuring that must go to the kitchen and I am right. I clean off the tray and rinse the dishes out and put them in the dishwasher. I clean the sink out of dishes, too. Then I start the dishwasher. I put the tray on the end of the cabinet out of the way. I see a door to the right and open it and that is the wash room, so I close it back. I go to the next door and it swings in to see a dining room. Very nice.

I go back and find the door into the hall which leads me to the family room. There I see Lil going through boxes of decorations and the hugest Christmas tree I have ever seen is in the corner. How did they get that monster into this room? I haven’t had a Christmas tree since I was eight years old and Grammy explained there was no Santa Claus and we could afford no Christmas presents, but we could celebrate the true meaning of Christmas our way. So that year and every year after we spent helping to feed homeless people and attending a church service. We received our meal for helping, so that helped Grammy out. It brought her happiness, and me, too. When Lil sees me gawking at the tree she smiles.

“They out did themselves this year. Con found this one and another one even bigger out in the woods behind the house. Do you like it?” She is such a kind lady.

“It is beautiful.” She’s got boxes on top of boxes to go through.

“Did you have a fake tree or real growing up? We can get one of those too if you like them better. This house is big enough for two trees.” Lil is waiting for my answer, but I don’t want to sound pathetic.

“The only trees I remember were real.” I try not to give too much away.

“You don’t have a tree every year? Oh, you’re not against Christmas, are you? I mean the whole tree and present thing? I don’t ever think of things like that. Some religions don’t do things the way we do.” Lil is trying to be sensitive.

“No, it’s not that. I haven’t had a tree since I was eight. We couldn’t afford the whole gifts and things, so we helped others out like us. I think it is an effective way to celebrate. Plus, we went to a service. We had everything we needed.” I want her to know I was ok with it and now I like to carry on the tradition. “Now I like it that way.”

“I’m sure we can find a way for you to keep doing that around here. We have a huge dinner at the clubhouse, but we will find you a service and I know there is a place we can all help at together.” I see that she understands and that makes me feel better. “Tomorrow we are going to trim this monstrosity and then go to the clubhouse and trim that one, so I hope you are up to it by then.”

“I will try to help, but I know nothing about it.” Lil is so warm and easy to be around.

“Nothing to it, sweetie. The guys will put on the lights and garland, and then we put on the bulbs and other decorations. We also have the house, yard, and clubhouse to decorate.” That’s a lot of decorating. “Then we have candy and cookies to make and gifts to buy and wrap. Three days before Christmas I’ll start on the club dinner. We have a meal with the club on Christmas eve, and then Christmas day I fix something totally different and smaller for home and anyone who doesn’t go to their family for the day.” It sounds wonderful. I’m nervous about the club, though.

“I’m a little nervous about going to the club. I know nothing about motorcycle clubs.” I know I can be honest with Lil.

“All the brothers are like any other men. They may be a little gruffer around the edges, but they have hearts of gold. Just don’t tell them that. They like to keep it well hidden. You’ll meet all of them tomorrow when we decorate the club if you feel up to it. I must warn you the club girls are not going to be happy that Shine has taken a liking to you. Be warned. They are alley cats and will do whatever they can to stop it. I have had to fight many a club girl over my man. I’ll be there with you, but do not let them intimidate you, because if you do, they will walk all over you.” I don’t even know these women.

“Why? I don’t even know them. Shine wants me, he says. I am really drawn to him, but we haven’t even talked. Do you think he means it? I feel something towards him, but I am not sure what. I’ve never even dated before. I was too busy working.” I have decided to see where this can go. I don’t want anyone interfering with it.

“All the sluts in the clubhouse want is for someone to claim them. Their number one goal is to be an old lady. No matter if the man is married or not. The higher up in the rankings they are, the better. Cap is President and that means every bitch wants him. After him is Shine and Con because they know one of them will be the next President. They are like our sons and are being groomed for the position. One will be President and the other VP. So, the bitches flock to them, as if they need that. They have no problems getting female company. Anyway, I was just warning you. I’ll be with you and there will be no worries.” Now I am worried. Why am I so worried? It’s like I have a knot in my stomach and I feel anxious.

“Where is Shine? I’d like to talk to him.” Lil looks at me.

“He’ll be back in a little while. He went to have a little conversation with the girls so there will be no complications. You have feelings towards Shine, don’t you? It’s written all over your face. That is wonderful. I thought it was all one sided, but you and Shine are going to be the cutest couple. Not that Shine will want to hear that.” Lil is genuinely happy for us. He’ll be here when he gets here.

“Can I do anything to help?” She looks buried in Christmas decorations.

“Come on over and help me separate these decorations. Plastic goes to clubhouse and glass stays here. They’re too rough at the clubhouse for glass.” I go over and sit on the floor next to her and we sort through more boxes than I own, and this is just Christmas decorations. It’s going to take a little getting used to.