Chapter 16

Lia

“This is madness, Leanne.” Mom gasped as she watched the fourteen men run across the field. “How can you tell who is who with all of their heads constantly butting together like that?”

“The boys are grown. They know what they’re doing.” Dad squeezed my shoulder from his lawn chair. I smiled back at him from the grass, thankful to have him in my corner.

My parents had flown back from their winter stay in Arizona this morning, both of them with golden tans and a happy-go-lucky outlook on life. It was sickening how giddy the two of them were. Of course, the last thing I wanted was for them to worry about their daughter’s love-life woes, which is why I’d kept up the facade of the doting sister who was dying to see her brother play rugby, when really, I couldn’t take my eyes off my brother’s best friend.

“You’re never too old for a broken bone.” Mom frowned and took a drink of her bottled water.

“It’s fine. Collin’s got life insurance.”

Mom gasped. “Leanne Montgomery!”

“Sorry, but it’s the truth.”

She frowned, eyeing the tats on my arms once more. “That is not something you should joke about.”

Frowning, I glanced toward the parking lot, praying like hell Addie and Chloe would get there sooner than later. I’d never needed them more.

The second my parents stepped off the plane, Mom took one look at me and burst into tears. Not happy tears either. Apparently, the new additions to my body—the pink hair and additional tats—had been a little much for her to take.

My transition from Old Lia to New Lia had been gradual at first. A few highlights here, a few hidden tattoos there. But throughout the past year especially, my body had craved more. At first, it had only been a ruse, something to help hide who I once was. Now though? I felt powerful with the ink, sexy with the pink hair too. It was a win-win for me…just not one for my mom.

“So, tell us when we get to see this mysterious Addie,” Dad asked, leaning forward in his chair. He looked identical to Collin: black hair, same build, and two dimples that adorned his cheeks when he smiled. He, at least, didn’t seem bothered by my new appearance.

“Soon, Daddy. You’ll love her.” I smiled and searched the field for my brother. At least he had to do the girlfriend intro thing. That would definitely take the heat off my back.

My parents had loved Amy, Chloe’s mother, and were heartbroken when she passed. Now that Collin had a new girl for the first time since he’d gotten home from his tours, our parents were insanely curious to meet the person who’d swept their son off his feet.

“How’s the job at the coffee shop coming along? Have you been getting more hours in now that you’ve gotten your degree out of the way?” Mom asked, leaning forward to grab her water bottle off the ground.

I chanced a look at my dad, finding his gaze on the field. His eyes were narrowed a bit, proof that he hadn’t told my mom about my bartending gig. It wasn’t so much that I was ashamed of it, but that I didn’t want Mom to worry. She’d be worse than Max and Collin combined if she knew I’d become an employee at our town’s nastiest bar. Dad only knew because Collin had told him, but like me, Dad knew Mom would freak out about it, so he’d kept it a secret for me. And for her.

Out of everyone in my family, Mom was the one who had seen me at my worst after I dropped out of college and moved back home. There were days when I’d refused to get out of bed. Days when I wouldn’t eat. The nightmares when I could fall asleep had kept her awake as much as they did me. I’d put her through hell, not that I could help it, which is why I did my best to shelter her about my current status.

Dad knew I could handle things now. That my job at Jimney’s was only temporary until I could finally land a real job as a teacher. I’d given two weeks’ notice last night, just like I told Max I would.

I couldn’t continue to work there, especially now that Patricia’s newest psycho was acting as the boss. He’d hit on me and called me a skank in one night. Something Max would beat him bloody for if he knew. I’d taken care of it though by letting the air out of the boyfriend’s truck tires before I left the parking lot after work. I was evil when I wanted to be and sweet when I had to be. It was a decent combo of awesome, I’d say.

The good news was that I’d paid off the last of my tuition and garnered some savings to help get by for a bit. Not just from tip money at Jimney’s and my measly salary from Java Java’s, but also because I’d sold quite a few of my personal possessions. I knew things would be okay, that once I made a steady income, I could replace material items.

“Leanne, did you hear what I asked?” Mom put her hand on my arm. When I looked up, I found her gaze on my face for the first time in at least an hour.

“Yeah, sorry. Work is great, Mom.” I cleared my throat and chanced a look across the field. Off to the side, Max stood, his hands on his hips, his eyes on me. I gave him a slight wave as I said to Mom and Dad, “I’m gonna use the restroom really quick. Be right back.”

I quickly grabbed the jersey sitting under Max’s bag a few feet ahead of me on the grass, wondering what he’d say when he saw me wearing it. Mom had been glaring at my tats enough for one day, so I hoped she’d be less freaked out if I covered them up.

Leaning against the back of the brick building that housed the bathrooms, I texted Addie, asking where she was. Seconds later, she sent a text.

Not going to make it. Chloe fell asleep, and I don’t want to wake her up.

Frustrated I wouldn’t have them as my backers, I blew out a breath and pocketed my cell. I pulled Max’s jersey on over my shirt. It was long, landing just above my knees, but it did the job I needed by covering my shoulders and arms. I rarely cared what I wore, but today was different. I felt dirty, though I knew my mother didn’t really think that about me.

Five minutes of fidgeting went by, and the uneasy ache squeezing my stomach refused to go away. I covered my face with my hands and shook my head, hating that I wanted to hide.

“Lia. What’re you doing?”

I looked up, finding Gavin’s imposing form standing in front of me. His brows jumped curiously over his green eyes as he searched my face.

I was glad he was home. But we all could see a change in him. He was more subdued than before, quieter but less angry too, which was strange. None of us could quite wrap our heads around his constant disappearing act, but because he was Gavin the super secret-keeper, we let it go.

On a sigh, I leaned my head back against the wall. “Um, would you believe me if I said I was taking a piss?”

“Girls don’t piss.” He nudged my shoulder with his own as he moved to stand at my side. The game must have ended, which meant Max would likely be looking for me soon. I wanted that more than anything, but at the same time, the pressure of dealing with the parentals and him was almost too much to deal with.

“You of all people know that pee and piss are the same, Mr. Medical Man.”

Not taking the bait, he frowned, studying me in that unnerving Gavin way. When he pursed his lips, the scruff he’d developed over the past few weeks moved as well. He was so oddly attractive, in that younger Josh Duhamel way—Josh Duhamel meets Charlie Hunnam—that even I got a little light-headed around him.

“This about your parents?”

“How did you know?” I folded my arms over my stomach, nervous for some reason.

He kicked his cleat against the wall we were leaning against. “You seem off today. Figured it was either Max or that.”

“Why’d you think it had something to do with Max?” I held my breath, not sure what to expect for an answer. Gavin was a very studious man. Aware of his surroundings and the people in them as well. He was a reader, I guess you could say. The fact that he was also best friends with Max didn’t hurt.

“Because love’s complicated, that’s why.” His eyebrows scrunched together, and he looked at me as though the answer was simple.

“Love, huh?” I couldn’t help but grin. “Nobody I know is in love.” At least, nobody he needed to know about right now. I rolled my eyes at his serious demeanor, then shoved him a bit. He didn’t budge, a huge, massive force that never failed to awe me. “You’re something else, Gavin St. James.”

His lips twitched like he was fighting a smile, something he didn’t do too often. “As are you, Little Montgomery.” He paused. “Seriously though. If you ever wanna talk about stuff”—he shoved his hands into the pockets of his black rugby shorts—“I’m pretty good at listening.”

“Thanks, you.” I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around his waist. I wasn’t much of a hugger, but Gavin looked like he could use one.

He laid his head on top of mine in a surprisingly affectionate move, wrapping his arm around my back. I smiled. I often wondered if Gavin was hugged much as a kid. I knew he’d been through a lot growing up, but I also knew he wasn’t one to display his emotions and affection much.

Footsteps skidded to a stop on the cement, a sweaty-looking Maxwell being the culprit. “Shit, sorry, I…” His eyes narrowed in accusation as he looked back and forth between Gavin and me.

“Hey, man.” Gavin’s arm stayed wrapped around my waist for a few seconds longer, then he pulled away. His voice was coy, happy even, but nothing about him seemed rushed. I, on the other hand, reacted like I’d been caught doing something wrong—shaking knees and goose bumps galore. “Lee-Lee was cold.”

I stiffened.

Max did too.

Oh God, Lee-Lee? Gavin did not just call me by Max’s nickname.

“Lee-Lee?” Max’s lip curled, right on cue. “Lee-Lee was cold? The girl who wears miniskirts and flip-flops and crazy short dresses in the freezing cold?” He folded his arms.

“Yep.” Gavin stepped around me. “See you on the side of the pitch, Martinez.” Then he pinched me in the ribs before leaning in to kiss my cheek. One squeeze of his hand on Max’s shoulder later and he was gone, his ginormous body exuding nonchalance that should not have been there…but totally was.

He’d just left me to the wolves. And I could almost guarantee he’d done it on purpose.

“So, this is how it’s going to be now, huh?” Max moved forward, taking Gavin’s place at my side. His face was expressionless, but his eyes flashed with uncertainty, jealousy too.

I frowned, taking a step closer to him. The bathroom door was just to our right, and I wondered what he’d do if I shoved him inside and kissed him a little bit. Max was the most adorable jealous man I’d ever seen.

“What do you mean?” I blinked, playing innocent.

He scowled down at the cement and slid his hands into the pockets of his rugby shorts. “Come on, now. You know what I meant.”

My lips twitched. I pressed a finger under his chin and lifted his face. “You’re not jealous of Gavin, are you?”

“No.” He shifted in place and shrugged.

“Liar.” I pulled my lower lip between my teeth to hide my smile.

He scowled and reached for me, tugging me close by the bottom of his jersey. “What’s this, by the way?” he asked, changing the subject.

“The coat of armor against my mother.” I folded my arms, losing my good mood. “She’s not too hip on my new ink, apparently.”

“I like seeing you in my jersey.” He pressed one hand on my hip and used the other to trace one of the tats peeking out from the neck of his jersey. “I also love Mrs. M, but if she doesn’t like your tats, then screw her.”

“Easier said than done.” I snorted.

He narrowed his eyes. “Those tattoos are everything you are as a person now, Lee-Lee. And represent everything I’m in love with.”

Tears filled my eyes at his sweet words. The kind of tears that had me smiling at the same time. Only Max could rock my world with a few simple words, making me feel as though something that was so big and imposing seconds before was minimal. A glitch in the road of life.

“You’re amazingly charming when you want to be, Maxwell.” I moved closer, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He dropped his chin, wiggling his eyebrows as he said, “Charming enough for you to want to get in a quickie inside the bathroom?”

I laughed, then stood on my tiptoes to kiss him. “You’re also incorrigible.”

“Can’t blame a guy for trying, right?” He nuzzled my neck and wrapped his arms around my waist.

I shut my eyes and sighed. Max’s arms were my new comfort, and in them, I felt as though I could take on the world and say stuff I wouldn’t normally say. Not that I was afraid to speak my mind. But I wasn’t one for the serious emotional stuff, all of which had been plaguing me since last night’s declaration.

As much as I’d have loved to jump into bed with him, to start this relationship off with a literal bang, I realized that a lot of things were still unsaid between us. Things I needed him to clear up before we took that next step.

“You good?” he asked, pulling back, uncertainty now clouding his eyes as they roamed over my face. “I was kidding, by the way. There’s no rush to…you know…” His cheeks went pink, a very un-Maxwell quirk. “We’ve got our whole lives to be with each other like that.”

“That’s not going to be a problem. Trust me.” Thankfully, the fact that I was attacked in college never kept me from wanting intimacy with a man. It took some time to emotionally heal from that night, but I was left more with my mistrust in the opposite sex than anything.

“Then what is it?” He pulled his arms from around my waist and cupped my cheeks. “What’s wrong? Tell me.”

I blew out a breath, knowing there was no way around telling him. So, I just spit it out. All three words. “I’m terrified, Max.”

* * *

Max

I blinked, taken aback by her words. “Of me?”

“No, no. Not you, per se, just this.” She motioned a hand between us. “Us.”

I blew out a breath, relieved I hadn’t done something to fuck up already. “Oh. Well, hell, Lee-Lee. Don’t worry. You’re not the only one who’s scared.” I dropped my hands from her face and grabbed her hands instead.

“As far as I can tell, you’re not scared of anything.” She shrugged, chewing on her bottom lip.

I tapped the end of her nose with a finger. “And that’s exactly where you’re wrong.”

I was scared for a lotta reasons when it came to us. What if I fucked up without meaning to? What if I unintentionally hurt her? And most of all, what if she decided I wasn’t what she wanted after all?

“How so?” she asked. “Tell me so I don’t feel like the only fool here.”

I swallowed, willing to admit all my flaws if it made her feel even a little less terrified. “I’m not perfect, Lee-Lee. I’m inevitably gonna fuck something up. But you’re the first—the only—woman I’ve ever wanted to try to be better for. You get me?”

“I get you.” She smiled, but didn’t hesitate to add, “But there’s one more thing you need to know.”

“What’s that?” I asked.

“I know about your business.” She reached up with her free hand and brushed a piece of my hair off my forehead. “And I want you to know that I’m so proud of you.”

My heart grew about ten sizes at her words. For the first time in four years—maybe even longer than that—I almost felt worthy of something other than drinking, sex, and rugby. And damn, did it feel good.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it right away.”

“I’m not your keeper.” She folded her arms. “You don’t have to tell me everything all the time.”

“No. But you’re half the reason I wanted to do this in the first place. You should’ve been the first person I told.”

“Because of what I said…” Her face went red, and shame gathered in her eyes. I hated seeing it there.

“You said what I needed to hear.” I leaned forward again, pressing my forehead to hers. “I needed to prove to you that I wasn’t some slacker who fucked around with things in life anymore.”

“Why?” Her voice was soft and smelled like peppermint.

“Because I’m fucking crazy about you.” I lowered my mouth, kissing her forehead, only to pull back and say, “I love you.”

She smiled, a slow curve of her lips that had me almost falling to my knees in devotion. “I love you too.”

“Fuck yeah.” I dropped my hand from her face and wrapped both arms around her waist. She squealed as I hiked her legs up around my body, then giggled as I spun us in circles.

“Maxwell Martinez, I never thought I’d see this day.” She sighed against the curve of my neck, fingers running through my sweaty hair with slow strokes in the back.

“And all it took was you.” I pulled back just enough to kiss her, sealing the deal while getting a taste of her sweet lips. She moaned, and I’m pretty sure I did too, only for a whistle to sound from the pitch, signaling the start of the next match. I didn’t want to let her go. It was the first time in months that the draw of the game, the time with my guys, and the promise of competition didn’t pull me in.

“I’ve got a catering gig tomorrow. My first paid job. Think you can spare an afternoon and be my assistant?”

She kissed my chin, then my cheek. “I would be honored.”

“Then afterward, maybe we could go to your apartment and hang out, watch movies or something.”

“Like a date…”

“Yeah. A date.” Not that it was an ideal one.

“Sure.” Dark-as-sin lashes batted against her pink cheeks as she glanced up at me. “And if you need any more help over the next few weeks, I can be that girl for you, since I only have one other job now.”

“You really quit Jimney’s?” Excitement had my heart beating faster. I set her down on the ground again but kept hold of her hands.

“Yep. Figured I’d overstayed my limit there anyway.” She scrunched up her nose.

“So what…you wanna work with me full-time then? At least ’til you find yourself a better-paying job? Because I could use another set of hands for a lot longer than a few weeks.”

“I’d love to help. You, me, doing the chef thing…”

“The chef thing, huh?” I couldn’t help but grin.

Gone was any hesitation. In its place was a woman who knew exactly what she wanted. And for some reason, she wanted me. I’d always been the fucked-up, goofy kid who didn’t take things seriously. But now? Seeing her look at me this way? It made everything disappear. Made me feel like I was important. Most of all, she made me feel like I had some sort of purpose. And that was the most incredible feeling I’d ever had.