Chapter 19

Max

Somewhere between pizza and a bottle of Boone’s Farm, Lia and I had fallen asleep.

I’d barely been able to concentrate on whatever movie she’d picked off Netflix. Between my throbbing hip—the one I’d gotten after I fell off her futon—to my forever raging hard-on, I was a mess. Luckily sleep had won out, giving me a little reprieve.

She stirred against my side, and I immediately opened my eyes. I wasn’t one to sleep soundly. At least, not since my time in Afghanistan. We’d always have to be on alert back then, and some habits a man couldn’t change.

It was still dark out, no telling what time, but I knew we hadn’t been out long. She got up and sat on the edge of the futon. For some reason or another, she was shaking, her head buried in her palms. Not wanting her to know I was awake, I stayed still and watched her, keeping a healthy distance. Lia said she didn’t wanna be rescued, but I wasn’t sure how far that went.

An advertisement danced across the TV screen, and the rumble of a thunderstorm echoed in the distance. Occasionally a flash of lightning lit up the room, showing the hourglass outline of her waist. She wasn’t wearing a shirt. She’d told me her preference was to sleep naked, and I wasn’t going to complain. A beautiful, unclothed Lee-Lee was my new favorite thing in the world.

A few minutes passed until she finally stood, wearing nothing but those tiny panties. I wanted to reach out for her, pull her close, but decided at the last minute not to. I wasn’t really sure why she was up, or upset. A bad dream, maybe? I could relate.

She headed out of the room, gone for a few minutes. I heard the water in the kitchen sink run and figured she was getting a drink.

Eventually she came back, in time for a loud thunderclap to echo in the room. She squeaked at the noise, running toward the futon, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Sorry.” She sat next to me, curling back under the blankets and against my chest. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

I snuggled closer, wrapping my hand around her warm waist and settling my chin on her shoulder from behind. The futon was uncomfortable as hell, but the discomfort was worth it to be close to her. “You afraid of a little thunderstorm?”

Quiet filled the air. She didn’t respond. I frowned, leaning up on one elbow so I could look at her face.

Her eyes were open, unfocused on the ceiling. “Terrified, actually.”

Another flash of lightning. I put my hand on her cheek and pulled her face toward mine. “Wanna talk about it?”

A shrug. “It rained that night.”

I fisted my hands. “In college.”

“Yeah,” she whispered with a nod, her gaze now locked with mine. “I remember my roommate telling me not to go. That it was supposed to get bad outside.”

I didn’t remember much about that night, other than finding her, carrying her out, and then taking her straight to the hospital. But now that she’d mentioned it, I did remember the way my rain-soaked hair had stuck to my forehead as I stood in the ER waiting room with Gavin.

Blinking the memory away, I refocused on her face. “I wanted to kill him.”

She flinched, but didn’t pull her gaze from mine. “You wouldn’t have found him. He took off that night. Never came back to school, to his apartment either. I-I didn’t even know his last name.”

“You could have found out. Pressed charges… Ruined him.” Like he almost did you is what I wanted to say but didn’t.

She frowned, not because she was upset, but more like she was thinking. “I was dumb. Scared. I just wanted to forget it ever happened.” She sighed. “My parents were already so worked up about Collin leaving that I didn’t want to add more issues.”

“I’d say that was a hell of a lot bigger issue than Collin leaving.”

She blinked and gave a small, sad smile. “Not to me it wasn’t.”

“Come here. I’ll always keep you safe from storms.”

She grinned but did as I asked, laying her head on my chest. “Thank you,” she whispered, so softly I could barely hear her. But I did. I always would.

After a while, her breathing evened out, only for a small snore to escape her lips.

* * *

Lia

I didn’t wake Max the next morning. Instead, I quietly slipped out of bed, took a shower, and got dressed and ready for work. It was Monday morning, and I had to be at Java Java’s early to help Betsy with the baking, something I normally loved. Except for today.

More than anything, I wanted to lie next to him and brush his dark hair away from his eyes until he woke and kissed me into oblivion. Then, maybe, I’d have the guts to do what I was regretting we hadn’t done last night.

Soon, I told myself. Very soon.

Betsy pulled up into the spot next to me by the coffee shop, taking in my sleepy state through the window. “Come along now,” she called. “Let me make us some tea.”

I nodded and opened the door with a grin, wordlessly following her inside. I felt high on life, regardless of the fact that I’d had to leave Max.

Like always, Betsy’s steps were cautious, and her hands shook a bit more than usual, but I wasn’t going to comment on it. She was worse about taking care of herself than I was sometimes.

Inside, she flicked on the lights, then shut and locked the door behind us. I headed straight to the kitchen to get to work, never tiring of this routine. I loved the Java Java Hut. Leaving it someday would likely break my heart.

“Did you wash your hands?” She motioned toward the dough.

“Yep. Always.”

Side by side, we readied and baked the morning pastries, her soft country music a welcome sound in the quiet.

My thoughts skipped to Max, wondering where he was, what he was doing, or if he was still asleep in my bed.

Before Max, more than anything else in my life, I’d wanted calm, peace, and focus. But with him, things were already taking a different road, one I hadn’t thought I’d ever travel, but in no way one I wanted to avoid. The dips and curves of a roller coaster ride, the high of stepping onto a plane, knowing your life is at another person’s mercy. It was a little bit terrifying, but a whole lot of incredible.

“So, Ruby told me you’ve got a job interview next week.”

Until that inevitable crash and burn came around, full force. Ruby and her big mouth.

“Yeah, um, I received the call last week. They want a formal interview with me this coming Thursday.”

“We’re so proud of you, dear. You deserve the very best.”

I smiled and hugged her close, inhaling the scent of flour and sugar in her hair. I’d worked there for years, and the only employees Betsy had were me and her daughter. She’d have to hire someone new if I got another job, something I’m pretty sure she wasn’t looking forward to. But Java Java’s was never my forever career. She’d known that from the beginning.

The job in Springfield, on the other hand, was exactly what a forever career entailed. An alternative junior high, a.k.a. “safe school,” was where I’d be working as an ELA teacher. Most of the kids attending the school had behavioral disorders, which would likely test me at times, but I could totally deal with it. I’d work there for the mandatory four years until I became tenured by the state. Then, after that, I could move back home again, find a job that was either in Carinthia or close by.

Before I knew this thing between Max and me was a possibility, I’d told myself I would take the position if offered, no matter what. I would never make something of myself if I didn’t take chances, and what better chance would I have than this? At the same time, what would happen between us once I left? I shook my head, refusing to go there. Things were so fresh and new that I refused to spoil all my happiness with what-could-bes right now.

“You’ve got something you want to talk about, girlie?” Betsy stopped in the middle of kneading and looked at me, then past me toward the front of the store.

“Just tired.”

“You look like you’re suffering from a broken heart.” She hummed under her breath.

Far from. “I’ve got a few things on my mind, but nothing to keep me from making the best croissants you’ve ever tasted.”

Not taking the bait, Betsy frowned and asked, “Does it have anything to do with the fact that your brother’s been pacing the front of the store for the past five minutes?”

I whipped my head toward the glass door. Sure enough, Collin was out there, running his hand through his hair, doing exactly as Betsy said he was. Worry for him, my niece, and Addie pulled me out of my thoughts. I needed to go out there, but with the amount of work we still had to do before opening, I couldn’t help but cringe as I pointed to the door and asked, “Do you mind? I won’t be long.”

Betsy motioned her chin toward the door. “Go on. Take your time, dear.”

A minute later, I flipped open the door lock and stepped outside, the warm morning air caressing my cheeks.

Collin’s eyes grew wide at the sight of me. “I’ve been looking all over the place for you.”

I frowned and pulled out my cell phone. It was off—probably dead. “Everything okay? Why are you out so early?”

“Got training at the academy in an hour.”

“Java Java’s doesn’t open until—”

“She won’t marry me.”

I jerked my head back. “Who, Addie?”

“Who else would it be?”

I took a step closer, grinning like a fool, which was probably not the reaction he was hoping for. But Collin didn’t realize how big this was. Rejection or not, my brother had come a long way over the past year. “You really asked her?”

He nodded. “Last night. Chloe was asleep and I took Addie out on the porch for a picnic. Had her favorite wine, some strawberries, even used the red checkered blanket from the first time we first had sex—”

“Oh my God, please don’t.” I pressed my hand over my ears, singing la, la, la.

He knifed his hand through his hair again. “Shit, sorry. I’m just… I’m a mess.”

Sighing, I leaned against the front bumper of his truck. “Tell me what happened. Start from the beginning, minus the sex-capades, please.”

“She freaked out. Told me she wasn’t ready. That with her mom being sick and only being at her new job for a few months, it wasn’t the right time to think about marriage. She said she wanted to be settled first.”

“What’s the issue, then? She didn’t technically say no, just that she wants to wait a bit.”

He shook his head. “I love her. She loves me too. We live together, and she’s already asked me about becoming Chloe’s legal guardian. I even called a lawyer to see what the process would be. All that’s left is marriage, and that seems like nothing compared to everything else.”

I squeezed his shoulder. “She loves you. She’ll come around.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose but managed a nod. That was something at least. Normally it took Collin a lot longer to get over his little “man tantrums.”

He frowned, leaning against the bumper of his truck at my side. “Why are you here so early anyway? I stopped by your place, thinking you’d be still asleep, but you didn’t—”

“You stopped by my apartment?” I froze.

“Yeah. About twenty minutes ago.”

“And I wasn’t there…” I blinked and then frowned at the sidewalk. Either Max didn’t answer the door on purpose, or he was asleep and didn’t hear it, or he’d already left.

“No shit, you weren’t there.” He tugged off my hairnet. I shoved his hand away and frowned. When I didn’t respond, he asked, “What’s up, Sis? Travis bothering you again?”

I shook my head, wishing it were that easy. Because the new complication of Maxwell and me wasn’t something Collin could know about yet. I was sure he wouldn’t be that upset, though we’d have to tread carefully in how we told him. But I’d barely wrapped my head around the idea myself, which meant I needed more time before I told Collin. And now with the interview, I was pretty sure our transition into official coupledom wasn’t going to go as smoothly as I’d hoped. The less drama, the better.

“No, not Travis. Just that I haven’t been able to sleep well lately.” That was true. Sleep and I never got along well. Last night had proved that, yet again. On top of the nightmare I’d had and the storm, I was running on two hours of sleep. Having Max there helped, but I never rested well. “And I’m always here early on Monday to help Betsy bake.”

“How about that other job?” His eyebrows drew together, but I could tell he was trying to stay positive about the fact that I worked at Jimney’s.

Fortunately, I had news on that front.

“Actually, I quit there. My last day is a week from Saturday.”

His eyes bugged out. “You did?” Then he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and squeezed. “Best news I’ve heard in weeks, Sis. What’re you going to do now?” He dropped his arm.

I could tell him that I had an interview, but what if he mistakenly told Max? I wanted to be the one to break it to him. Word of mouth often hurt worse than the real person-to-person explanation.

“Apply for some real jobs, as you so eloquently suggested I do in the past.”

“What about school?” His eyebrows pulled together as he studied me. “Don’t you want to finish first? Last I heard, you had a few semester hours left.”

I stared at my feet. “I’m done.”

“What? No, you have to finish—”

“No, Collin.” I touched his arm, meeting his gaze, all while praying he wouldn’t hate me for not telling him earlier. “What I meant was that I got my diploma a few weeks back. I didn’t attend a graduation or anything, so it’s not a huge deal.”

He jumped away from the truck, only to wrap me in a big bear hug. I laughed as he squeezed, and I tucked my nose against his shoulder, fighting back my happy tears. I knew I’d been worrying everyone in my family with my lack of motivation, but the fact that he reacted like I’d given him the world made me feel like even more of a jerk for being so standoffish the last couple of years.

“Why the hell didn’t you tell anyone?”

I gulped back my emotions as he put me down, his hands never leaving my shoulders. “I told Max. Just told Mom and Dad too.”

“You told Max and not me?” The accusation in his voice had me cringing. God, I should’ve waited to mention this. If anything, I was hoping to have a job first to distract him from the news. But the best-laid plan never worked out.

“Sorry. I just knew how busy you were with Addie and Chloe and the police academy.”

Blue eyes like mine stared back at me with both sadness and pride—a strange and unnerving and wonderful combination. “I get it. And I am proud of you, Lia. I just wished I would’ve known.” He stuck his hands into his pockets.

I blinked away a few tears and wiped the ones which had escaped onto my cheeks with the back of my hand.

“Why Max though, of all people? I mean, I know you two have this weird friendship…” He tipped his head to the side, his eyes narrowing in confusion.

“Because…” I love him. And he loves me. “Because we’re friends.” I cringed, realizing how ridiculous that sounded.

A frown captured Collin’s face, the tension rolling off him like a tsunami of angst. I already felt really guilty. I didn’t need another reminder of how wretched a sister I’d been.

“Do you want some coffee?” I nodded my head toward the door, needing to distract him. “We don’t open for another twenty minutes, but Betsy wouldn’t mind if you came inside. She wouldn’t even make you pay.”

He looked through the door, then back at me, his blue eyes softening. “Next time.”

“Next time.”

“You’ll be at Mom and Dad’s Thursday night, yeah?” he asked.

I patted his cheek. “Wouldn’t miss it.”

After searching my face once more, Collin walked away, waving as he got inside his truck.

“Collin?” I hollered through his open window, genuinely happy for him.

He poked his head out. “Yeah?”

“Addie’s lucky to have you.”

He grinned, his eyes nearly dancing. “Nah. I’m the lucky one.”