Chapter 15

“Namaste.”

Lawson repeated Julie’s closing phrase as the Wednesday night yoga class wrapped up. The breathing and poses hadn’t helped him relax as much as usual tonight. He’d gone to see Dr. Pierce this morning, and she’d been brutal with her advice. She still didn’t think he was ready for relationships, or for flying.

“You okay?” Julie asked, placing her rolled-up yoga mat under her arm and coming up beside him. “You look stressed.”

Lawson shook his head. “I’m fine.” He glanced around to make sure none of the other students were watching. Then he leaned in for a quick kiss on her lips. “And even better now.”

She angled her body toward him. “Long day?”

“You could say that.”

“Want to talk about it?”

He nearly flinched. “Nope. I’d rather listen to you tell me something good.”

“Okay.” Julie’s face lit up. “I’ve been waiting until I could tell you this in person. I’m going to be offering two different yoga classes at the Veterans’ Center next month. Allison also said I could do a trial Sunday class for kids. And my hourly wage for doing these classes is higher than I made at the gym in Charlotte.”

“Now, that is good news,” Lawson said.

“It won’t take time away from me watching Sabrina, either.”

Seeing how happy she was made him feel slightly better. Her smile was contagious. “Sounds like a celebration is in order.”

Her brows lowered. “A celebration?”

“Yeah. Of course. Celebrate as much and as often as you can. That’s my philosophy. And having more work doing what you love is worth celebrating.” Plus, he didn’t want to be alone right now. When he was alone all he did was think about helicopters. It was a vicious cycle. The more he thought about them, the more anxious he felt. The more he wondered if his career was over, and worried about where that would leave Beth and Sabrina.

With Julie, he didn’t worry about those things.

“Okay. But I can’t stay out too late. It’s a weeknight and I need to watch Sabrina in the morning.”

“Of course.”

“What kind of celebration do you have in mind?” she asked.

A few off-color thoughts ambled through his head. Tonight he only wanted to see Julie smile, though. “Just trust me.”

She hesitated. He hated that. And the guy she’d dated in Charlotte.

“Please,” he said, offering his hand. “You won’t be sorry.”

Julie left her car parked in her driveway and climbed into Lawson’s truck to go who-knew-where. That thought made her stomach feel a little uneasy. Here she was again, allowing someone to choose for her. He hadn’t even asked what she’d wanted to do tonight. He’d simply said, “Trust me.”

“I do trust you. But can you at least tell me where we’re going?” she asked now, sitting beside him in his truck.

Lawson slid a sexy glance in her direction. It made her want to throw caution to the wind. But she couldn’t. “Not one for surprises?” he asked.

“No, I love surprises. I just also like to make my own choices.”

He shook his head. “Your ex really messed with your head, didn’t he?”

She hugged her arms around her body, hating that the answer to that question was yes. Hating that she couldn’t just relax and allow Lawson to take her wherever he pleased. Doing so wouldn’t mean that she didn’t have an opinion.

He scratched his chin as he turned onto Seaside Drive, a scenic road that led to Seaside’s touristy downtown area and pier. “I can’t fix what that scumbag did on your last birthday, but I happen to know that the bakery and ice cream shop here serves chocolate cake.”

Her heart melted a little at the mention of cake, and at the fact that Lawson was trying to make up for Daren’s mistakes. “Chocolate cake?”

“Um-hmm. It’s such a nice night, I thought we could take it out on the pier. Maybe sit on one of those benches and relax.”

She was sorry she hadn’t let him surprise her. “That’s very sweet.”

He scrubbed a hand over his cheek as if she’d slapped him. “A few nights ago you were calling me sexy. Now I’m sweet.”

“That’s a step up in my book,” she said.

Parking, he looked at her. “Just don’t tell anyone, okay? If Mel Harris catches wind that there’s hope for me, she might start showing up at the gas pump next to mine again.”

“The gas station, too?” Julie laughed. “Are you sure you don’t want to give her another chance?”

“Not my type,” he said, unfastening his seatbelt.

“If not Mel, then who is your type?” It was a stupid question because she didn’t really need to know. The only reason she’d need to know was to see if she matched the description. But they had an arrangement—friends and lovers. And she liked this new arrangement.

“My type?” He was looking at her, long and hard, making no move to open his truck door and get out. “I’d say my type is blond. With green eyes. Fair skin, a lot like yours. She’d like hokey stuff, like yoga.”

Julie swallowed. She’d been hoping he’d say as much. “I see.”

“So, what do you say? Can I take you out for a slice of cake and a walk on the pier?”

She nodded. “I’d like that.”

“Good.” He opened his door and got out, walking around to the passenger side. “Well then, darling, let’s go have our cake. And if you decide that you don’t want chocolate tonight, just say the word. It’s lady’s choice.”

She took his hand, allowing him to help her from the truck, then walked by his side across the street, thinking about his words.

Lady’s choice.

At the moment, the thing her heart was beginning to want most didn’t feel like a choice at all.

“This is the best celebration I’ve ever had,” she said fifteen minutes later, seated on a wooden bench on the pier. “Thanks for this.”

“It’s no big deal.”

But it was a big deal. “You know, every time I think I have you pegged, you surprise me.”

He grinned, softening his tough demeanor and showing off a smear of chocolate on the corner of his mouth.

“You have, um…” She laughed a little.

“What?”

With his rugged good looks and trademark hat, he should’ve looked ridiculous. Instead, he just looked delicious. “Chocolate. You have chocolate on your face.”

He wiped a hand across his mouth, only smearing it further. He tried again as she shook her head and laughed harder.

“Let me,” she finally said, reaching up to touch his face. Time seemed to slow as she did. He watched her, his smile faltering.

“There.” She started to pull her hand away, but he stopped her.

“I believe that chocolate is mine.” He covered her finger with his mouth, taking the chocolate and making her entire body sizzle with awareness.

“Um…” She gave way to nervous laughter, pulling her gaze, and her hand, from his.

He reached an index finger to her chin, urging her to look at him again. It was such an innocent gesture, but it felt like the best kind of foreplay. Every touch from him felt like the best she’d ever had.

“Congratulations,” he said. “Let’s make a toast.”

“Okay.” She grabbed her Styrofoam cup of hot cocoa and tapped it against his raised one.

“To new beginnings. And friends.”

“New beginnings and friends,” she repeated. They’d advanced well past friendship, though.

They took a sip of their drinks and then Lawson placed his down. “A toast is usually sealed with a kiss.”

She arched a brow. “I’ve never heard of that before.”

He shrugged. “It’s tradition.”

Her gaze flicked to his lips. “No disregarding tradition. We better kiss then.” Her heart pounded at the thought. They’d kissed before, had sex, but still every touch felt new. Every touch awakened a deeper desire inside her.

He slowly swept a hand behind her head and pulled her to him. His lips were hot and, with the chilly breeze blowing off the ocean, she grabbed on to the kiss hungrily, melting into it, into him. He tasted like chocolate, which made her want him even more.

“You are so beautiful,” he whispered, pulling away just for a second. “Why do you make me want you so much?”

She laughed against his cheek. “So this is my fault, huh?”

“It’s not mine. If you weren’t so damn gorgeous.” The heat of his words warmed her ear as he whispered.

“I have another way of celebrating in mind,” she said.

His eyes locked on hers. “Yeah? Well, it is lady’s choice. Lead the way.”

“You don’t even know what it is,” she said.

“I trust you.” He enveloped her hand in his. “And I have a pretty good idea what you want. It’s written all over that pretty face.”

She swatted his shoulder. “My place. Now.”

“You don’t have to ask me twice,” he said.

He wasn’t going to think too hard about this because if he did, he knew reasoning and Dr. Pierce’s advice would take over. And right now his brain was not working. Not with Julie’s hands running up and down his chest. Not with her naked body writhing under him, begging him for things that he wasn’t about to say no to.

He bent and kissed her neck, loving how her body arched up to meet his. Yeah. No way was reason getting in the way tonight. “I want you, Julie,” he whispered, trailing kisses to her ear and nibbling softly.

She grabbed his face and pulled his lips toward hers, kissing him as if her next breath depended on it.

“Is this the celebration you had in mind?” he asked.

“Mmm. I was actually thinking we could do yoga,” she teased, clutching the hard muscles along his back, pulling him closer until hers felt like a second skin.

“Oh, yeah? I like this position.” He kissed her along her collarbone, loving how she wiggled restlessly. “What do you call this pose anyway?”

She gasped as his tongue flicked along her sensitive skin. “Fuck,” she finally whispered.

“Yeah. That’s a good name.”

“Now. I want you now,” she said, clinging to him.

Obliging, he pushed his way inside her. “Fuck,” he said, mimicking her earlier words. But this didn’t feel like any fucking session he’d ever had. This felt like something different, more intimate. There he went, reasoning again. “You feel so good,” he whispered, pressing deeper inside her. “So, so good.”

They continued like that for what felt like hours, until they both were drained and lying together in her bed. He wanted to go get her a glass of water afterward, but damn if he didn’t think his legs would take him to the kitchen. His whole body felt relaxed lying next to hers.

“Julie?” he said after several minutes had passed.

She didn’t answer.

“Julie?”

Her breaths were slow and even. Sleeping? He tried to remove his arm from under her head, but she snuggled closer into him, moaning softly in her sleep.

Okay. He’d wait until he was sure he wouldn’t wake her, and then he’d get up. Until then he’d just have to figure out how not to fall asleep, too. Because waking up in a cold sweat beside Julie couldn’t happen.