Chapter 20

Julie left the Veterans’ Center and drove home, exhausted from two back-to-back yoga classes. Exhausted, but equally excited. She had an interview for the new wing’s assistant director position next week. Allison had assured her that her résumé was golden. But Mr. Banks still wanted to talk to references, which only made sense. The problem with that was, Daren was the only person who’d ever hired her as anything health-related. And there was no way he was going to give her a glowing review.

Julie sighed. Not without some convincing at least, which she planned on doing tomorrow. She’d drive out to Charlotte in the morning. After what he’d put her through over the last three years, he owed her a good reference. And she had the confidence now to face him and demand it. At least she hoped she did.

Lawson’s truck was waiting in her driveway as she pulled up. He got out and waved at her as she pulled in.

“Hey,” she said, as he opened her car door for her. She’d been wondering if she’d see him tonight. He’d said he was going to be working late. “What are you doing here?”

“Maybe I missed you.” He pulled her up against his chest and kissed her. His lips were soft and warm. She breathed in the smell of him, like hay and old leather. Yeah, she’d missed him, too. “I stopped by Beth’s this morning and you weren’t there,” she said, closing her eyes as he trailed more kisses down her neck. Then he stopped and waved at her neighbor. Julie turned and hesitantly waved, also. “I didn’t know you knew my neighbor.” She furrowed her brow at him.

“I don’t really. But apparently she rides with Beth. She keeps my sister informed about how often I’m over here.”

Julie’s eyebrows rose as she glanced at the sweet woman next door. “Oh.” Julie laughed softly. “Maybe we should move our kissing inside.”

“Good idea.”

She led him in the house. “I’m just going to change clothes real quick. Feel free to make yourself something to drink.”

In her bedroom, she stripped out of her yoga attire, and then pulled on a floral skirt and cotton top that screamed sweet but sexy, and hopefully irresistible. She gave herself a quick once-over in the mirror.

“You look great,” Lawson said, holding a glass of champagne as she walked back into the living area. “Like a woman who’s ready to conquer the world. Or just take over the Veterans’ Center.”

Julie smiled. “I haven’t gotten the job as assistant director yet. I still have to win over Mr. Banks.”

He handed her a glass filled to the top. “You’ll do it. I believe in you.” He tapped his glass to hers.

“Thank you. That means a lot to me.” She brought her glass to her lips and took a sip. Having a man in her life that believed in her was a sharp contrast to her past. Looking at Lawson now, she liked her future.

“I, uh, was hoping you’d spend the night with me tonight?” he said then. “I had to turn you down last night and it just about killed me.”

She pulled her lower lip between her teeth. “I…can’t. I’m going on a little day trip tomorrow.”

He set his glass on the counter beside him. “A trip? Where are you going?”

“Just to see an old friend.” She tried to make it sound as casual as possible. With his protective instincts, Lawson would probably insist on going with her. And while she loved that about him, this was something she needed to do on her own. “I’m free tonight, though. We can”—she trailed a finger down his chest—“stay in or go out. It’s up to you. I haven’t eaten yet. What are you hungry for?”

He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her against him where she could feel that certain parts of him were very excited to see her. “You,” he said, surprising her by lifting her off her feet. Then he carried her down the hall and into the bedroom.

Lawson laid Julie down on the bed and stared at her for a long moment. Her skirt was slightly lifted, falling above her knees. Her hair was splayed out around her face. “Beautiful” was the only word he could think to describe her, but that didn’t do her justice.

She sat up and pulled at the button of his jeans.

“Wait a minute,” he said. “I thought I was the one seducing you.” He smiled as she slowly lowered his zipper.

“I want to celebrate you tonight, too.”

The front of his pants tightened at her suggestion; he nearly exploded with her touch. He forced himself to push her off, before he lost too much control. Then he lifted her blouse over her head and pushed her gently to lie back on the bed. “This is what I wanted to do last night.” He ran his hands and mouth over her body, enjoying the way she shuddered against his touch. Her skin was soft, smooth. He never tired of the way it felt. “I want you,” he said. “All of you.”

Except he didn’t mean he wanted her sexually, although that was a given. He wanted her, all of her. He wanted to wake up with her in the mornings and go to sleep with her at night. He wanted to tell her about all the things that haunted his dreams. And he wanted to know about her hopes and dreams as well, wanted to make them all come true.

He kissed her mouth, then moved to grab a condom from the nightstand drawer beside them. They were on the last of the ones they’d purchased at the grocery store weeks ago. He slipped one on and returned to the comfort of her arms, looking at her in a whole new light as he made love to her. The first few condoms might’ve been just about sex, but now it was more between them. A lot more, which should’ve terrified him, but it didn’t.

When they were done, he handed Julie back her skirt. “I’ll still take you to dinner if you want.”

Her eyelids hung sleepily. “Hmm?”

He grinned. “You said you were starving earlier,” he reminded her. “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go.”

“Anywhere?” she asked, draping her arm behind her on the pillow. She looked like an angel beside him.

“Lady’s choice.”

“I’m beginning to love those two words.” She stretched and started to sit up. “Just give me a few minutes to get beautiful again.”

“You’re already beautiful, darling.” He leaned in and kissed her on the mouth. She tasted like the champagne they’d sampled before landing themselves in bed. “But I’ll wait for you in the living room.”

He got dressed and walked down the hall, giving her privacy. Each step he took felt like walking on air, because of her.

Ten minutes later they were in his truck and driving across town to the local all-night pancake house.

“Of all the places you could’ve picked,” he teased.

She laughed. “I have a sweet tooth sometimes.”

Yeah, he did, too. And she was the sweetest thing he knew.

“So where exactly are you going tomorrow?” he asked when they were seated in front of a large stack of pancakes, topped with maple syrup and fresh fruit.

Smoothing her hair behind her ear the way he’d realized she did when she was nervous, she forked another bite of pancake, sliding it across the plate and soaking up the syrup. “Nowhere important.”

“Julie?”

Her gaze lifted to meet his and she sighed, her shoulders rounding. “I’m going to Charlotte for the day.”

A lead feeling anchored in his stomach. “Charlotte? Why the hell are you going back there?” He heard the edge in his voice.

She shrugged. “I didn’t want to tell you. I knew you’d be upset.”

“Are you going to see him?” he asked. “Are you moving back?”

Her eyes widened. “No. Of course not. Seaside is my home, and I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon.”

Something loosened in his chest. “But you are going to see him? Your ex?”

The look in her eye told him it was true.

“It’s a long story, but I need to face Daren. I need to tell him why I left.”

“You don’t owe that jerk-off anything,” he said through a tight jaw.

“No. But I owe it to myself,” she said slowly, firmly. “Things are unresolved between us. I slunk out of that place before daylight, like a frightened girl. I need to prove to myself that I’m not that girl anymore.”

Lawson picked up his napkin and wiped his mouth. “I’m going with you.”

“No.” She shook her head. “I’ll be back tomorrow night. I need to do this on my own, Lawson.” Fire sparked behind her eyes. She wasn’t angry, she was determined.

Every muscle in Lawson’s body was tight. No part of him wanted to see her go back to Charlotte. Not because he was jealous—maybe just a tiny part—but he also didn’t want to see her get hurt again. “If he so much as looks at you wrong, you call me.”

A soft smile bloomed on her mouth. “Deal.” She outstretched her hand.

“We haven’t made a deal in a while.” He took her hand, rubbing his thumb along her smooth skin. “I mean it. I protect the ones I care about.”

“Which means you care about me.”

“Of course I care about you. I care a lot about you.” And that was as close to relaying his feelings as he usually got. Never show fear. Guard your feelings, boy. His father’s voice was as clear in his head as the truth about his feelings for Julie were in his heart. He pushed both away.

“I care about you, too.” She stabbed another bite of pancake, putting it in her mouth and chewing. “Flipping the tables now. Let’s talk about you. How’s work going?”

Lawson leaned back in his chair. He’d prefer being in bed with her. “Great,” he lied. “I spoke to my commander this week and I’m returning to regular duty next week.” That wasn’t a lie, unfortunately.

Julie straightened. “That’s awesome news, Lawson. I’m so proud of you.”

“You’re the one doing great things in this town.”

She blushed a little. “I love this town. It’s my home. When I was young I couldn’t wait to leave, but now that I’m back…” She shrugged. “I’m here to stay.”

Lawson watched her. He hadn’t lied when he said he cared about her. He wanted her to be happy. God knows she deserved a little bit of joy after her shitty ex. That’s why he needed his transition back to regular duty to go as smoothly as possible next week. He belonged where Julie was, and Julie belonged here. That was as clear as the desire in her eyes right now. “Again?” he asked. “You can’t get enough of me, can you?”

She grinned, shaking her head and setting her fork down.

“I’ll grab the check,” he said.

The sun was just coming up as Julie passed the sign letting her know that she was leaving Seaside behind. But not for long. Seaside was her home now, and there was no sweeter place.

Except maybe in Lawson’s arms.

A warm feeling ran through her as she retraced the details of the night before: making love, having dinner, Lawson telling her that he cared about her. She could put a lot of meaning behind those words if she wanted to. Maybe “care” really meant he loved her. Would that be so bad? To be loved by Lawson?

Smiling to herself, she veered onto the interstate. It would take another three hours to reach Charlotte. Daren would just be waking by the time she arrived. And hopefully he’d be in a good mood. If he was feeling rational, they’d agree that they were never good for each other. Then they’d part ways amiably, and Daren would give her a glowing reference when Mr. Banks called next week. That was the best-case scenario.

Julie’s phone beeped beside her. She’d respond later, when her hands and mind were free. For right now, she’d just keep basking in the memory of last night. Hopefully there’d be many, many more of those in her future, which she could begin enjoying just as soon as she handled her past, once and for all.