Fourteen
Parker
I'm not sure how long I can sit here with Tora on my lap before I will need her naked. My resistance is barely existent. I want her with every fiber of my being.
As I lean in to kiss her, my phone rings on the kitchen counter. I groan and close my eyes.
"Ignore it," Tora says, and splays her hands on my chest.
"I can't. I have to make sure it's not B." I watch her for a reaction. Tora knows this is how things are. If Blair calls, I go to her.
Tora stands so I can get up and check my phone. She doesn't say anything, keeping her eyes on me as I go to the kitchen.
Blair's name flashes on the screen of my phone. "B, are you okay?"
Soft sobs reach me before Blair speaks my name quietly. "Parker..."
"I'll be right there." I hang up and grab my keys. I start to head for the door, but Tora's voice stops me in my tracks.
"Is she okay?" Shit. I forgot she was here. How the fuck did I do that? The woman I love is back in my life. Blair calls and everything else fades away, but not in a good way. It's like I get tunnel vision and only can focus on making sure Blair is safe.
"Tora, I'm so sorry. Every time she calls I just bolt out the door." I reach her in three long strides. "Please, come with me."
"Are you sure? She might not want me there."
"She told you everything that happened. If she didn't want you there, or want you to know anything, then she wouldn't have opened up. Part of being friends with B, and knowing all her shit, is facing this kind of thing with her. She needs us. I want you to come. If we’re going to make this work between us, you need to know where I go in the middle of the night. You need to see what happens when I get there, because I never want you to think I'm lying when I leave to help B."
"I wouldn't have thought—"
"Maybe not right away, but I worry about over time. This frequently happens when she's stressed. Plus, you going with me, you'll see how you can help her if she ever calls you. We're all she has, Tora. Will you come with me?" She nods.
Jumping in my SUV, I drive across town well over the speed limit. I'm not worried about getting pulled over. Flying through town isn't something I normally do, but I have been pulled over in the past. Our local cops know about Blair and what happened. I told them sometimes I have to rush to her place and they've left me alone since. No questions asked. I don't go stupid fast, but definitely over the speed limit.
I pull into Blair's driveway and open the garage door. The routine is so ingrained in me that I don't even think when I get here. I just move.
Tora and I jump out of the Rover. We go inside, disarm the alarm, and go up the stairs. We don't talk; neither of us has said a word since we left my place.
The first place I check is the closet, since that's the last place I found her. She isn't in there, so I check the bathroom next. The lights are off, the curtain closed on the shower. As I approach, I hear a slight whimper.
"B, it's only Tora and me. I'm going to open the curtain now." Slowly I pull it back as not to startle her further.
Blair is sitting tucked against one side, with her knees brought up to her chest. I climb into the dry tub and crouch in front of her. The only light spilling in from her bedroom. The sun is setting and even with her blinds drawn, a little light still gets in. I hold out my hands to her. She hesitates before placing her shaking hands in mine. After I lift her up, we slowly walk to the bed, and I tuck her under the blankets.
"We're going to be right back. We're going to get one of your pills." She nods and closes her eyes.
There are times when Blair will talk and cry, and others where she shuts down when I get here. I don't bother trying to get her to talk anymore. After so many attempts, I know it's of no use. She will talk when she wants to.
Downstairs, I show Tora where the pills are. I take the package out and retrieve one pill. "She only gets one at a time. I bring her this and a glass of water."
"Why doesn't she leave them upstairs? Then she can grab them when she needs them."
"She's too afraid. The pill knocks her out. It's not like a regular sleep where a disturbance will wake her. She'll sleep solidly for hours and isn't easily awoken. She's worried if Brant were to come after she took one, she'd never hear him."
"But she has the alarm on the house. The police will be called if someone breaks in."
"I know this and so does she, but if she's in a deep sleep, she might not hear it and it wouldn't give her time to hide. He would be on her in a matter of minutes and there would be nothing she could do. At least if she's startled out of a regular sleep, she can hide. She's found spots all throughout the house, which aren’t obvious, where she could crawl into until police arrive. This could all be for nothing, too. I don’t know for sure he’d come after her, though I have a gut feeling he will. And if it makes her feel better to have a plan in place, then I’m all for it."
“Has he contacted her while he’s been in prison?”
“He used to try, but she refused to talk to him.”
“What makes her think he’d come here?”
I shrug. “It’s more of a feeling she has of impending doom. She said she’d never seen him as angry as she did that day. It was like a switch flipped and he became a completely different person. The nightmares don’t help. They constantly have her reliving her past.”
Tora looks around the kitchen, tears filling her eyes. "I hate that she lives like this. So afraid all the time."
"Believe me, so do I. But she won't come live with me. I've asked her. She doesn't want to be a burden on me—more than she already is. Her words, not mine."
"I can see her side of it. It has to be awful living in fear. How much longer is he in jail for?"
"He gets out very soon, but we don't have an exact date. She hopes she’ll get a call before he's released. Unfortunately, that doesn’t always happen. We'll be lucky to know the day of."
Back upstairs, I give Blair the pill and water. She clutches my hand in hers then looks at Tora. "I'm sorry," she cries. "You two were together and I ruined your night."
Tora goes to the other side of the bed and sits down. She takes Blair's free hand in hers. "You did not ruin our night. I told you I would be here for you and that's what I'm doing. Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Stay."
"Of course." Tora looks to me. "Can you please get my purse and phone out of your SUV? I want to let my parents know I won't be home tonight."
I nod, go downstairs, and outside to grab her things. With the Rover locked, I close the garage door and set the alarm. Back upstairs, I notice Tora has gotten under the blankets with Blair and is holding her tight. Blair is crying, while Tora softly runs her hand over Blair's hair. Handing Tora her phone, I stay next to her while she quickly types out a text and places the phone on the nightstand.
I climb on top of the blankets and settle on the other side of Blair. Tora's eyes find mine. "Go, I got her. Get some sleep." I'm surprised Tora is offering to spend the night here. They only just talked this morning.
"No, it's fine. I'll stay."
Blair’s breathing evens out as she relaxes in Tora's arms. Those dissolvable pills are amazing. They work much faster than one you swallow.
"Parker, I'm okay here, really. Let me do this. If for some reason one night you can't get here, then I will."
"For now." Yeah, it was a dig at what she said earlier about maybe not getting a job locally, but fuck if my heart could handle her leaving again. I could follow her, but what about Blair? Or my family? Or Cy and Eve? There are so many questions running through my head, which I would love to get answers to. Now isn't the time, however. I should never have said what I did.
"I'm sorry," I say honestly.
"I don't want to leave you, Parker, but I need to find a job I'll love. I'm not sure where that will be."
"I know. I shouldn't have brought it up. Are you sure you're going to be okay here?"
She nods. "I'm tired. I could use the extra sleep." There's no point in arguing with her. Once she's made up her mind there is no changing it.
"I'll grab Cy later and have him bring me to your SUV. I’ll drive it up here and leave the key fob under the floor mat."
"Thank you." She hands me the key fob.
I guess I'm being dismissed. She doesn't want me here tonight. Maybe what I said truly upset her. Shit. I'm such an idiot.
I stand without saying another word and leave the house, making sure to disarm and rearm the system as I go. When I get to my Rover, my phone vibrates with an incoming text from Tora.
Tora: I'll call you tomorrow.
Me: Sounds good.
I'm not sure what else to say. I upset her. Now I get to go home to my empty bed, where only hours ago I was so close to having her in it.
The drive to the cabin is short and Cy and Eve aren't back yet. I throw my keys on the counter and go to my bedroom, closing the door behind me. I throw myself down on the bed and replay everything that happened today with Tora.
We made a lot of progress, but my mouth had to go and fuck it up. Then again, maybe I need to do things differently. When we dated the first time, I tried to always keep the peace between us. I never wanted to fight with Tora and did everything in my power not to. If she got mad at me, it was for something small and sex always worked to make her forget what happened. We were always on good terms.
Going forward, do I want to be the same? Life has taught me I need to say what I feel and not hold things in. That I could lose someone I love at a moment's notice. No, I'm not going to stay quiet this time. If we are going to fight, so be it. It's healthy to let it all out and not keep it bottled up. I don't want to regret not saying something or wish I had done things differently. Tora and I are starting fresh, and I'm going to be honest and open with her every step of the way.