The morning sun peaks through the curtains sending a beam of light dancing across the room. The aroma of freshly brewed coffee fills my nose. A goofy smile spreads what feels like from ear to ear.

Propping myself up on pillows, I see where the delectable smell is coming from.  Sitting on the end table next to me is a steaming cup of coffee and a blueberry scone. I take the warm cup in my hands and as I lift it to my lips when the bathroom door opens.

I lose all ability to function the moment he appears in the doorway. Justin steps to the door and leans against the doorway in nothing but a towel. It looks like something that you’d see in a movie. Steam encompasses around this gorgeous being. The towel is hanging down, showing the V that drives any girl out of her fucking mind crazy. The water has collected into little droplets, making his skin glisten. My eyes run from his feet to his head and back down again, soaking in every possible detail.

Justin starts walking toward me. My God, even his walk demands attention. I don’t even realize that I haven’t moved a muscle since he opened the door. He takes the cup from me, placing it back down on the table.

“Morning.” He places his hand under my chin, lifting my face, and leans in gently placing a kiss on my forehead.

That’s when I see the tattoo that runs across his chest. ‘Death Before Dishonor.’

I’m so intrigued. I don’t say anything back, only reaching up and running my fingers lightly across the words, while wondering what secrets they hold. I finally reply, “That’s really powerful.”

He sits down on the bed next to me. His caramel eyes take on a heavy, sad look.

“I’m guessing that it means something very special to you.”

“Yeah…” He pauses for a few seconds. “It’s for my Dad. He was a Marine. He had one just like it. They were the words he lived by. I swear he was one of the greatest men to ever walk this earth. And I was lucky enough to call him Dad.”

“You said was. Something happened. Do you mind if I ask what happened? If you don’t want to share its okay, I understand.”

“The way they were taken from this world was cruel and to this day still shreds me to the core. I love remembering them. It makes me feel like they’re still around in a way. Tell you what, the world lost two of the most amazing people when it lost them. It’s the remembering, well I guess imagining how they were taken away is what kills me.”

I move so that I’m sitting closer to him. I rest my chin on his shoulder with my arms wrapped around him. From experience, I know this isn’t an easy thing for him. I watch him disappear into the past as he starts to tell his story.

“It was mom and dad’s wedding anniversary. Dad had spent endless hours trying to come up with something that would knock mom off her feet. There was this theater production in town that mom wanted to see so damn bad. It was a hot show, so dad knew getting tickets wouldn’t be easy. It was pure entertainment for us watching him try and work the internet before they sold out.”

Justin laughs, but I can hear the pain and anguish that saturates it. “I swear, dad would have moved heaven and earth to get those fucking tickets. He loved nothing more than to see her smile. Anyway, after the show they stayed and had a couple of drinks. It was really late when they were headed back to the car. Out of nowhere, some mother fucker came out and put a God damn gun to my mom’s head. He grabbed her purse from her arm and tore the watch from her wrist. Mom was wearing the pearl necklace that dad had given her for a wedding present. The bastard ripped that from her neck. He demanded that my dad hand over his wallet and watch too. As dad reached into his suit pocket, the man shot him right in the chest. Then knocked my mom to the ground and shot her. She was able to scream for help, but there was no one around, the lot was empty. She crawled over to my dad. There she was, alone, covered in their blood, holding the love of her life as he slipped away from her. Little did she know that she would join him shortly after. She fought like hell for the next few days, but we both knew that it wasn’t meant to be. She didn’t remember a lot about what happened. What she did remember would come and go. No matter what she always remembered her pearl necklace. She cried as she told me that each one seemed to bounce to the ground in slow motion. She vividly remembered the dull, lifeless thuds each and every pearl made as they landed. I was holding her hand the moment she took her last breath.”

I feel the tears slide from my eyes. “I’m so sorry, Justin. That must have been awful for her, for you.”

"Yeah, it was as if my world had been completely ripped away from me. Before I left the hospital, a nurse handed me a small black velvet box. When I opened it, there was a single pearl from mom’s necklace nestled into a pillow of lavender silk. It was at that exact moment that I understood they were really gone. I’d never felt more alone in my life.”

I fucking understand what he’s going through. To this day my mind creates a different horrid movie like images of how my mom and sister died. How they were hit, what they looked like laying in that cold dark street. What they must have been feeling, or heaven help them thinking as they took their last breath. There are some nights that it seems like it’s set on a continuous loop. Playing over and over again. Like a cancer eating away at me. No matter what I do to stop it, nothing helps. Eyes open, eyes closed it doesn’t matter, it only keeps playing.

“Please tell me that the bastard who did this was caught and got what was coming to him.”

“Oh, he did.”

As if someone flipped a switch, Justin changes the subject. I’m guessing that he’s not as comfortable talking about his parents as he led on or at least not this part of it. Jesus, fuck, who would be? It seems like Justin, and I might have more in common than he knows. In one swift move, he flips me backward, pinning me against the bed. He leans down where our faces are just inches apart. Oh, good hell! Why does he keep doing this to me? His eyes begin to take on a hooded, smoky look as he stares at me. He starts to lower himself until our lips are almost touching. I hold my breath in anticipation as to what’s going to happen next. I want to feel his lips on mine, his weight pressing against me. I want to feel him inside me. It’s very quickly turning into more than a want. It’s turning into a need.

Pressing his forehead to mine, he lets out a long sigh, then pushes himself away from me. He sits back, grabbing my hand, pulling me up too. “So, what are your plans for today? Oh, wait that’s right you have a big day of nothing planned if I remember correctly. Well, that’s good because I’ve got a plan for us.”

Whoa! What the fuck just happened there? I sit in total disbelief. Did I just imagine that? No. I mean, I’m fucked in the head, but I don’t think I’m totally delusional. 

 He hands my cup of coffee back to me. I look down at the cup and back at him. “I don’t want this.”

I set my coffee down and position myself so that I’m straddling Justin’s lap. The hooded look he had earlier returns and his breathing becomes shallow.

“Damn girl, you are making my resolve to be a gentleman hard and my dick harder.”

It’s easy to see that he’s not lying. The huge bulge underneath the towel proves it. His hands run up my ass pushing my flimsy T-shirt higher and higher. I grind my throbbing pussy against his rock hard cock. I swear that he can feel how wet I am for him through my panties. He grabs my ass, lifting me up so that my tits are right in his face. My nipples as so hard that they protrude through the shirt. They only get harder as he starts to bite at one and then moves to the other. I try to lower myself down against him. The ache is killing me. I have to find relief. I need to feel him.

His teeth continue to nip and bite as his hands grab me around the waist, stopping me from making the contact that my body is begging for. I grab a hand full of his hair and pull back hard. His teeth snapping from my swollen nipple provides the most delicious pain. 

I crush my lips against his. His tongue begins to passionately explore my mouth as mine does his. Keeping one hand on my ass, the other travels up my back, coming to rest on the back of my neck. He pulls me in closer. My entire body feels alive, and my desire for him demands to be fulfilled. Just then he pulls away.

What the fuck! It’s like I was dreaming and all the sudden I’ve woken up. “Why did you stop? Why do you keep fucking doing this?”

He lifts me off his lap, sitting me next to him, then lowers his head into his hands. My heart sinks, and I feel sick. It feels like someone just hit me with a fucking baseball bat right in the stomach.

“Justin! What is it? Am I so repulsive that you can’t bring yourself to fuck me?”

My head is spinning with confusion. I don’t fucking get this at all! Never in my life have I ever had a guy who didn’t take pussy when it was offered to him.

He still hasn’t said a word with his head still resting in his hands. Anger starts to mix with my confusion. I get off the bed and stand right in front of him, lowering my face down to his. My body is so tense that it feels like even the lightest touch would shatter me into a million pieces.

My heart is racing, and my hands are shaking. In a calm yet demanding tone of voice, I ask, “Is this some kind of sick fucking game to you Justin? Are you just fucking with me? Because if you are, there’s the God damn, mother fucking door!”

He leaps from the bed causing me to lose my balance and stumble backward. He catches me by my shoulders and pulls me to him so that our faces are barely an inch apart.

Holding me tight and looking me directly in the eyes. The expression on his face is that of stone. “This is not a fucking game to me. You are not a fucking game to me.”

“Then, why?”

He sits me on the edge of the bed and crouches down on his knees in front of me. “I don’t know if I can explain this to you so that you won’t think I’m fucking nuts.” He lowers his head again. When he looks up, I swear his eyes are glassy. “I just need you to trust me. I know I haven’t earned it yet, but can you do that? Please.”

Standing up, he crawls in bed behind me, and pulls me up to him so that I’m wrapped in his arms. Resting his head against mine, he pleads, “Please, say it. Tell me that you trust me.”

I sure the fuck don’t understand it at all. But there’s something in my gut that says I should trust him.

In a soft whisper, I tell him, “I trust you.”

We lay here with Justin wrapped around me, not saying a word. His breath evens out as it caresses my cheek. I feel like a caterpillar wrapped safely in its cocoon. Even though I don’t understand him a single bit, I honestly trust him. I love this feeling. I don’t know if its peace, security, or just that he makes me feel complete. But, I could stay like this forever.

Even though the sun is pouring through the space around the curtains telling me that it’s time to get up my eyes grow heavy as sleep takes over.

The room is suddenly dark filled with a ghostly like mist. I see a figure walking toward me. “Justin is that you?” The figure doesn’t respond just continues walking. Squinting my eyes to try and see who it is. My heart is pounding out of control as panic sets in. Who the fuck is that? Why is someone in my room?

In a panicked voice, I cry out, “Justin! Is that you?”

The figure still doesn’t say anything. I look beside me, and there lies Justin sound asleep. My fear dissipates as the closer the figure moves towards me, I see that there’s actually two figures; one is that of a child. That’s when my heart stops completely. “Mom, is that you? Stella? Oh my God! Mommy, is that really you?”

I scurry to the foot of the bed on my knees. “Oh, I’ve missed you both so much! I love you so much.”

They look so beautiful, so angelic. Nothing like the images I see in my nightmares. I want to reach out to them, but my arms feel too heavy to move. Neither of them say a word as they stand looking at me. The sweetest smile crosses their faces and mom bends down and kisses my cheek. Then she looks at Justin and smiles. They turn around and hand in hand they start walking back into the mist. Before they vanish, Stella turns around and blows me a kiss.

I sit here and watch the spot where they disappeared, and I can’t help but smile. Even though there is so much, I want to say to them, I have this content, heartfelt feeling that things might just end up okay for me.

“Kitten, wake up. Come on we’ve slept the entire day away. Wake up, beautiful.” My body gently shakes back and forth. The feel of soft, warm lips touching my forehead wakes me up instantly. I sit straight up remembering my dream, smacking my head against what feels like a brick wall.

“Whoa, whoa! Slow down. Shit, I think you broke my jaw.” When my eyes finally come out of sleep mode, I see Justin sitting next to me rubbing his jaw.

“Oh fuck! I’m so sorry.” I reach forward to touch his face and end up poking him in the eye.

“Damn girl! You are dangerous when you first wake up. I’m thinking maybe I should start calling you Sugar instead of Kitten.”

“Why, cause I’m so sweet?” I question, batting my eyelashes.

“No, because you have a hell of a right hook.”

“Ha Ha Ha! You’re so funny. Sorry, I just had the most spectacular dream.”

“Was it about me? Cause I’ve heard that before, you know.” He has the fucking adorable smirk on his face again. I swear that look makes my heart melt every fucking time.

“Yeah, that’s not exactly something I want to hear about! Other girls dreaming about you. Besides, I said spectacular, not me behaving like a ravished animal.”

Justin gets up and heads to the bathroom, “Hurry up and get ready or we’re going to miss it. Oh yeah, you’re going to want to pull your hair back with more than just a pencil.”

“Why? What are we doing?” I call out in his direction.

He pokes his head out of the door. “Oh, you’re not only jealous but also a nosey little thing, aren’t you? You’ll just have to wait and see.”

Poking my lip out, I give him my best pouty face. It doesn’t do me any good. “Wait, who says I’m jealous? I’m not jealous! Maybe a little territorial, but that’s totally different than jealous.”

“Yep, it sure is. Totally different! Now get your ass ready to go.”

It’s said that curiosity killed the cat, well I don’t give a shit. He has me in ultra, super nosey mode. “Come on! Just what exactly are we going to miss?”

He pokes his head out of the door again. Very slowly he repeats himself, “You’ll just have to wait and see.”

“Fine.”

I’m thinking now is a perfect time for a little payback. I walk into the bathroom and am standing behind Justin. We make eye contact in the mirror, and I shoot him my best vixen grin. I slowly lower my panties down my legs, stepping out of them, then lifting my T-shirt over my head, and tossing it on the floor. Justin hasn’t taken his eyes off me. With a wink of my eye, I step into the shower pulling the curtain closed behind me.

A mumbled, “Shit,” is all I hear as the latch of the bathroom door clicks, signaling that he’s left the room.

I finish my shower as fast as I possibly can. I don’t waste any time getting ready. All I want to do is get back to him and find out what it is that he has planned for us. I’m like a kid on Christmas morning.

When I get done, Justin is laying on the bed with one arm tucked underneath his head, watching TV. He looks so unbelievably sexy it’s hard for me to focus on anything but him. He’s dressed except for his shirt. He’s left the top button of his jeans along with his belt undone. His chest and stomach are like sculpted stone under a sea of different colored ink. My eyes are drawn again to his tattoo, ‘Death Before Dishonor.’ Is he like his father? Is he the kind of man that truly lives by those words?

Taking a seat on the edge of the futon to slide on my shoes, I am trying to act like he’s not affecting me. I turn back to look at him. “So, hotshot, what’s the plan?”

He runs his hand seductively down his neck and across his chest coming to rest upon the bulge in his pants. “Hmm, I don’t know. Are you hungry?”

Oh, he is good! I want nothing more than to have him buried deep inside me. For me to be screaming his name so loud that the entire block knows it. But I can play it cool too, at least I hope I can. “Yeah, I think I could go for some pizza.” Looking back at him, I smirk. “You know something deep dish.”

Justin raises his brow. With slow and seductive moves, he gets up buttons his pants and fastens his belt. He grabs his T-shirt from the end table and pulls it over his head. His hair is messed up in a very sexy way. He has a look in his eye that tells me he’s on a mission. Even though he’s putting his clothes on, my heart starts to beat faster, and the ache between my legs is begging for attention. Making his way over to me, stopping directly in front of me, he bends down so he is eye level, grabs me around the waist, and lifts me up, wrapping his arms around me. He lifts me up high and slides my body down his, only stopping when our faces are just inches apart. I wrap my legs around him. I can feel his heart beating against my chest. His warm breath against my skin causes goosebumps to form from my head to my toes. My eyes move from his eyes to his beautiful lips. The anticipation for his touch is killing me. I move my body closer to his. He glides his hand down my back until he’s cupping my ass. Then with a quick jolt, he lifts me up tossing me over his shoulder. I let out a loud shriek when he smacks me hard on the ass and heads for the door. All Justin does is laugh as he carries me down the staircase.