THE NEXT WEEK IS A whirlwind. Even though The Wavettes have taken over my after-school schedule once again, it’s nice to have something familiar to focus on. Plus I get to watch Raegan’s co-captain skills in action, which are much tamer compared to watching her lead the school with her presidential duties.

Surprisingly, my house is much tamer, too. It helps that Peach finally landed that bakery job in Claremore, which is a twenty-minute bus ride from Cedarville. She wakes up at four o’clock every morning to be at work at five to start prepping for the day, so my mornings are now Peach-free. This also means my dad is now in charge of breakfast, and I’m much more partial to his chocolate chip pancakes.

Because of the craziness of my Wavettes practices this week, I haven’t had time to get help with algebra. On the rare occasions Mrs. Donaldson allows us to work on homework in class, Alex leans over and tries to help me. But we always end up discussing the latest episode of Crime Boss or getting in a heated round of Would You Rather? where one of the answer choices is always Mrs. Donaldson.

“Would you rather nail your own foot to the ground or live with Mrs. Donaldson for a year?” I asked him on Thursday.

Alex adjusted his beanie before answering. I decided I liked the beanie. It was strangely fitting, like the way he always wore those double shirts.

“Ugh, I’d probably nail my foot. At least it’s over with quickly.”

“Really? You wouldn’t want to have resounding dinner debates on the latest mathematical theories?”

“Pass.”

“She probably makes a mean pi.”

He laughed. I always feel a swell of pride when I make him laugh.

I’m sitting with everyone at lunch on Thursday when Alex walks by our table with a lunch tray in his hands. He gives me a small smile when he sees me, nodding in my direction. I wave back.

Jay leans over and steals one of Breck’s chips. Unlike the button-down he wore to the party, he’s back to wearing his letterman jacket over a Cedarville Basketball T-shirt.

“So what are this year’s Spirit Week themes?” he asks Raegan.

Raegan closes her notebook. “I can’t officially announce them until next week.” She throws us a smug grin. “But they’re awesome.”

Even though all of us went to Breck’s party, Raegan doesn’t seem mad. But she also didn’t ask about it. I make a mental note to ask her to hang out this weekend—if she has time. It’s the least I can do to put an effort in our friendship, even if she isn’t holding grudges.

Breck tosses a Cheeto at her. “You’re no fun.”

Raegan glares at him. “Excuse me, do you know how hard it is to run an entire school while your mother’s experiencing pregnancy-related hormonal episodes?”

Lin glances up from her flashcards. “You’re not exactly running the entire school—”

In typical Raegan fashion, she ignores this. “It’s exhausting. Plus, I’ve been YouTubing birthing videos—”

Breck plugs his ears. “I don’t want to hear about the placenta!”

I raise my eyebrows. “Who said anything about a placenta?”

He points a finger at Raegan. “She was about to!”

“I wasn’t, but you shouldn’t be so squeamish. It’s a natural part of the birthing process.”

Colton looks genuinely confused. “What’s a placenta?”

“Dude.” Jay shakes his head, then leans over and quietly explains in what I can only imagine is the worst kind of detail.

“And people eat that?” Colton says in the middle of swiping one of Whitney’s fries.

She glares at him. “You would probably eat it, Colton.”

He freezes mid-chew. “That’s disgusting.”

Breck glares at Whitney. “Dude, stop talking about it.”

“You’re going to make some woman very happy one day,” she remarks. “Especially if you keep calling them dude.”

Lin laughs. “Who wouldn’t vote for him for Homecoming King?”

I pull my water bottle away from my lips. “You’re nominated?”

“I can’t help that the people like what they see.” Breck grins. “Beauty and brains, right, L?”

“Dear god,” Lin mumbles, shaking her head.

“Get you a man who has both.”

“Your narcissism is up here.” Lin raises her hand above her head. “And I’m going to need you to bring it down here.” She gestures, lowering it near her shoulder.

I almost forgot about homecoming. It’s a few weeks away, but still. I haven’t mentally prepared myself for flying solo.

I catch myself glancing over at Jay, wondering if he’s regretting going to homecoming with Whitney this year now that I’ve returned. A twinge of loneliness flickers inside me when I remember him whispering how beautiful I looked in my gold gown the night of the homecoming dance, and how he held the small of my back when we posed for pictures together. I wonder if he misses those moments, too.

He takes a huge bite of his sandwich, and a few crumbs stick to the bottom of his lip. When he catches me staring, he gives me a perplexed look like, What?

I sigh. I sincerely doubt it.

There is no one in the house when I come home after Wavettes practice. A note from Peach sits on the counter, saying she’s taking the late bus back from Claremore because she’s catching up with some old friends. My dad is most likely working late. I have no clue where Nonnie could be, and I’m betting Saylor is working a shift at 7-Eleven.

It’s quiet. Oddly quiet. I can’t remember when the kitchen and living room were void of any type of commotion.

I heat up a plate of pizza rolls and watch an old episode of Crime Boss. I find myself wishing my dad were around to make fun of Agent Dane Lizar’s soul patch or how corny the explosions are in the early seasons due to low budgets. Instead Wallis thumps his tail on the rug, watching me with bated breath as I finish off my pizza rolls.

My cell phone rings. Margaret—Social Worker flashes across the screen. A rush of panic envelops me as I pause the TV. My first thought is She knows. I don’t know how, but someone must have alerted her about the recoverees. Dread overpowers the panic. What if she’s calling to send me back?

I try and keep my voice level when I answer. “Hello?”

“Kira, hi! This is Margaret Garcia.” Nothing about her tone seems off. “I just wanted to call for a quick check-in. How is the transition going?”

“Oh! It’s good! Great!” I blurt, then quickly want to smack myself. I need to bring down my enthusiasm. I don’t want to give her any red flags. “My dad really seems to be keeping his promise about getting back on track.”

“I’m very glad to hear that,” Margaret says. “Now, we usually schedule an in-house check-in. Just to drop by and make sure you’re in a good environment.”

I force myself to keep calm. I cannot, cannot allow her over here while Nonnie, Peach, and Saylor are still around. There’s no way she’ll believe that them being here is a good environment for me.

“Oh, I’d say my environment is more than good. My dad’s been working back at Cedarville Elementary, and I’ve been getting back in the swing of things at school. And with dance, too. We’ve got a lot of stuff keeping us busy.”

There’s a pause at the other end of the line. “It’s great to hear you’re adjusting so well.”

I hold my breath, waiting for her to continue.

“Well, you’ve been through a lot, and I want this transition to continue to be smooth. You know you can call me if you suspect any signs of trouble?”

“Yes. Yes, I do. And I will.” I’m eager for this call to end. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” she replies. “Don’t be a stranger. I’ll follow up soon, okay?”

I tell her okay, and we both hang up. My heart pounds all the way through the end of the Crime Boss episode. It’s not that I’m lying to her. I’m just not sharing the entire truth. Everyone here has remained sober, and I don’t need to worry her, or worse, get myself sent away again when I’m only trying to bring things back to the way they were.

When the episode ends, I turn off the TV and put my plate in the dishwasher. I have a ton of homework to do, including reading the rest of The Crucible for English. I go upstairs, flop on my bed, and force myself to try to absorb what’s happening in the play.

The front door squeaks open, interrupting my thoughts. I’m setting the book down on my nightstand when I hear two hushed voices arguing downstairs. I get out of bed and crack open my door.

“It’s times like this when I could use a drink,” my dad’s saying, his voice heavy and sad. “I think I’ve moved past the pain of losing her, and then it sneaks up on me.”

An uncomfortable sadness rises in my throat. I know he’s referring to Grams.

“Adam.” That’s Nonnie, stern and unforgiving. “You do not need dependency like that, you hear?”

My dad’s voice is hoarse, defeated. “It was easier when she was around. She really understood Kira. Much more than I do, and now she’s so distant—”

Wallis begins to bark, drowning out the rest of his words. I had no idea my dad felt that way. Sure I was close to Grams, but we also had our own relationship. We bonded over food and Crime Boss and little stories about each other’s day. His presence in my life is just as important as hers was.

I hear more shuffling as they enter the kitchen, so I step into the hallway so I can hear better.

There’s more rustling as Nonnie pours food in a bowl for Wallis. “—and it’s like we’ve been telling Peach. It takes time. You broke her trust.”

I’m surprised Nonnie understands.

“—and you don’t want to give up on her. Not when she needs her dad back. She doesn’t need the kind of father who resorts to drinking when he’s upset.” Wallis barks again, and I hear Nonnie set down the bowl with a loud clank! “Heidi was a wonderful woman to you both, but it’s the two of you now. You’ve got to heal together.”

I step back into my room and quietly close the door. I knew there was a chance my dad could relapse, but I didn’t realize he was still struggling. I wasn’t naïve enough to believe the ranch would completely cure him, but it seemed like spending time with the recoverees was helping. He’s been trying with me, but maybe I’m the one who needs to try harder with him.

Nonnie’s right. We’re both alone, and we shouldn’t have to continue to suffer alone, either.

I’m about to walk downstairs, but I hear the front door open. “—need to clear my head, take a walk. If Kira asks—”

“I’ll let her know,” Nonnie says, her voice sad.

The door shuts. He’s gone.