I feel like I can breathe again when I finally get back to my office. I sit down behind my desk and lean back, staring out the window, trying to get myself together.

I can’t believe it was him, Declan, the guy from that party three years ago. The guy that gave me one of the most intense and passionate nights of my life. The guy that I ditched and ignored afterward, despite him calling a couple of times to try and see me again.

I can’t believe it. He still looks incredible, rich and handsome. But if I had known… I never would have gone near this case.

I pull the files and start to comb through them. The only name on most of the documents is Reid Nash, but buried in one of the research files is Declan Jones. Reid and Declan are co-owners of their company, although this particular project is apparently mostly Reid’s. That’s why I didn’t know Declan was involved, the only reason he could have blindsided me like that.

My head’s spinning, trying to understand. Did he do this on purpose? No, that’s impossible. There’s no way he could have known that I’d be on this case. I didn’t even know until a week ago.

I stretch and sigh, getting myself together. I don’t know why it’s such a big deal. So what, so he’s a guy that I had a one-night stand with three years ago. I didn’t call him back because I was busy with law school and frankly, I was afraid to get involved. And of course, some stuff happened, and I probably should have called him back eventually… but I didn’t.

And now he’s in my life again, mysteriously, magically. I don’t know how or why, but that’s just how it happens sometimes.

I manage to get through the rest of the day without any new surprises. Declan’s on my mind, but fortunately I can still concentrate enough to go through my always-boring paperwork.

“Did you see Mitchell?” Sara asks me as we leave the building at the end of the day.

“I’ve been busy,” I say to her. “Had that Commons meeting at noon then a mountain of paperwork.”

She makes a face. “I wanted that Commons job. It looks kind of interesting.”

“Not that great,” I say, looking away.

She laughs. “Anyway, Mitchell. He was wearing this tie, pretty much neon yellow, and these oversized suspenders. But the best part is, he had a mustard stain on the tie. Couldn’t see it, because the tie was yellow, but it was there, right under his pudgy face.”

I can’t help but laugh. Mitchell is another associate at our law firm, this loud-mouthed asshole that I really despise. “He probably tried to make the hot dog stand guy buy him a new tie.”

“I bet he had some fancy argument for that one.” Sara rolls her eyes. “He’s such an ass. But I loved seeing that at least.”

We laugh together as we pile into the subway. It’s a short trip up a few blocks to my neighborhood, and Sara lives a bit further out. It’s pretty nice that we can ride to and from work together.

Sara basically got me this job. It took me an extra year to finish school and to pass the bar, but in the end it worked out. She recommended me to her bosses right as they were looking to hire a new junior associate, and I ended up landing the job. Lowry, Staples, and Begley is one of the better practices in the city specializing in environmental issues, and although there’s not a ton of cash in environmental law, it’s still incredibly fulfilling.

“See you later,” I say to Sara as the train pulls up to my stop.

“Give Felix a kiss for me.”

I smile and wave as I head out, falling into the flow of bodies. I take the grimy stairs up into the early evening sunlight and turn left, heading toward Felix and, eventually, to home.

My feet hurt, and I keep seeing Declan Jones staring at me in that meeting. He wasn’t being subtle about it, and part of me was worried that someone might notice. Nobody did, of course, or at least if they did, they didn’t guess why. How could they possibly know? It’s not like they were there that night.

He roughly pulls my wrist behind my back, his other hand cupping my breast. I can feel his hard cock against my ass. My dress is half off, pulled down and hanging loosely around my waist.

“Are you going to struggle?” he asks.

“No,” I whisper.

“Good.” He presses harder on my wrist. Slight pain runs up my arm. His other hand slowly moves down and slides beneath my dress. I’m dripping wet with anticipation as he finally finds my soaking pussy, rubbing my clit in slow, agonizing, maddening circles.

“Why would you want to struggle?” he asks, my arm still pinned behind my back. I reach my other one around and wrap my fingers through his hair, making him grunt. “You’d just be denying yourself the pleasure you clearly need.”

“Asshole,” I whisper through my moans.

“No, I’m not an asshole,” he responds, his voice deep and delicious. “I’m just the man that’s going to dominate you tonight. I’m going to give you a taste for it. And you’ll never forget.”

I feel his fingers press up inside me just as he pushes a bit harder on my wrist, the pleasure and the pain mixing and sending insane signals through my brain. I wish I could deny it, tell him he can’t do that to me, he can’t make me like something new, but the only thing coming out from between my lips are deep, ravishing moans, and I know he’s right. I hate him, but god, he’s right.

I step in through the glass double doors, pushing onto the clean vinyl flooring with the other people packed into this small waiting room. I smile and nod at the women I recognize, other young moms and dads, and I chat with a guy named Derek. His daughter, Lydia, likes to play with Felix, and we’ve been going to the park together lately.

“I hear there’s a cold going around,” Derek says seriously.

I shrug a little. “When isn’t there?”

“I know.” He sighs. Derek hates getting sick apparently. “They’re such gross little things.”

I grin at him. “But so cute.”

He nods seriously. “So cute.”

Just then Felix comes teetering out of the back room, holding the hand of one of the daycare employees, a big woman named Toya.

“Mommy!” Felix leaves her, breaking free, runs over to me. I drop down to one knee and swoop him up, forgetting everything but Felix, my little nearly-two terror, my baby boy.

“Have a good one,” I say to Derek as I carry Felix outside. I put him down and hold his hand as we walk slowly the few blocks to our home.

Felix chatters about his day, about blocks and friends and sharing and something about a dinosaur that I can’t really understand. I smile and nod and encourage him to keep talking, but in the back of my mind I keep slipping back to Declan.

Three years ago, he gave me the night of my life, made me feel things I never thought possible. And now, three years later, I have my little Felix. I can see the resemblance in him: the same nose, the same jaw, the same hair. Declan doesn’t know about Felix, of course, since I never told him, but I know he’ll figure it out if they ever meet. It’s just so obvious.

Which means they can’t ever meet. Though I don’t know why they would. Yes, I’m working this case against Declan, but I’m the opposing counsel. There’s no reason that I would ever fraternize with Declan, aside from sitting across a table from him. Still, I should get rid of any pictures of Felix lying around my office, just in case.

I get Felix home and we go through his evening routine when I’m the one in charge: changing clothes, making food, watching kiddie cartoons for an hour. He builds a block tower while I cook dinner, and it’s just as I’m finishing up when my phone rings.

I don’t recognize the number. A little distracted by what I’m doing, I just answer without thinking.

“Hello?”

There’s a pause. “Hello, Teagan.”

I stop what I’m doing. I know that voice, I’d recognize it anywhere. “Declan?”

“I’m happy you know it’s me,” he says, his voice velvet seduction. “It was good seeing you today.”

“Ah, yeah,” I answer, totally caught off guard. “You too.”

“It’s been what, three years?”

I glance at Felix. “Yeah, I guess so,” I say.

“And now look at you, working for a big fancy environmental firm. It’s impressive.”

“Thanks,” I say. “But you know, we really shouldn’t be talking.”

“Maybe not,” he says. “But we’re old friends. No reason we can’t separate business and pleasure.”

The way he says pleasure sends a chill down my spine. The memory spikes, briefly but intensely, a flash of desire in me again.

“I guess so,” I say. Just then, Felix knocks over his block tower by accident, stumbling into it the way little kids do. He starts crying.

“Listen, let’s have dinner,” Declan says. “Purely for pleasure, no business allowed. Just two old friends catching up again. What do you say?”

I’m distracted by Felix, and I just want to get off the phone so I can calm him down. “Yeah, uh, sure,” I say. “Of course.”

“Good. I’ll send over the details.” A slight pause. “It really was good seeing you.”

“You too.”

With that, he hangs up, and I can take care of my son. I get him calm and happy again, back to building another tower in front of the television. By the time I’m plating dinner, I realize what I just did.

I just agreed to go out with Declan.

He says we’re just old friends, but we were never friends. We knew each other for a night. Honestly, I’m a little surprised he even remembers me. He doesn’t seem like the kind of man to recall every single one of his conquests. And based on the way he touched me, how comfortable and skilled he was, he definitely has a lot of conquests.

I shouldn’t be going, but it’s too late. I can’t call and cancel. I don’t want to be totally rude, since I will have to work with him in some capacity in the future. I don’t want to jeopardize this case further by pissing him off, risking anything. I can go to this dinner, be friendly, catch up, and that’s it. There doesn’t have to be more.

I can just keep telling myself that. Dinner and nothing else. No pleasure, despite how much I might want that.