Chapter 22

Kylie

I wanted to sleep in on Sunday, especially after such a hot night of sex, but my mind was not having it. I lay there with my eyes shut as long as I could and then slowly opened them, squinting at the light coming in through the window. I groaned, rolling over on my back and running my hands down my bare stomach. I was bloated for like the fifth day in a row. I had resorted to yoga pants for the time being, not wanting the waistband of my jeans to dig into my skin all day. It drove me nuts when my clothes got too tight. Maybe all that food Grant was cooking me was starting to weigh me down.

I grabbed my phone off the desk and turned it on, sighing when no new messages appeared on the screen. I didn’t know what I was expecting. It was eight in the morning on a Sunday, so everyone I knew was probably still passed out, except Piper, of course, who I could hear cleaning the house. She was a nut like that, and a lifetime of serving five a.m. coffees to people forced her to be a morning person.

I flipped to my calendar and scrolled to the last month, recounting the days since my last period. I had noticed I was late a few days before but chalked it up to stress. Now, though, I was about ten days late, and that had never happened to me before, not even during the most stressful of times. Fear dropped into my belly as I lay thinking about how I had been feeling lately. I had been exhausted, and not the normal college student exhausted either. My mind never let me fall asleep right away, but recently anywhere I leaned my head, I found myself drifting off to sleep. On top of that, I’d had some slight stomach upset, nausea mostly in the morning that lasted until I could get something in my stomach. I felt like I was starving, so I would fix a ton of food only to eat a quarter of it before I ended up pushing it away, which was something Piper had made a comment on the day before.

I shook my head, telling myself not to panic yet. It could have been everything going on. I pulled myself out of the bed and sat there for a moment as the dizziness subsided. I wrapped my robe around me and shuffled out to the kitchen where Piper was cleaning. She smiled and poured me a cup of coffee, setting it in front of me.

“What’s wrong?” She realized my face was anything but happy.

“I’m ten days late on my period, sick to my stomach, and I can’t stay awake for anything,” I blurted out.

“Whoa,” Piper said, her eyes getting wide. “Okay, let’s not panic. You’ve been going through a lot lately. Go throw on a sweatshirt and some shoes. We’ll go to the store.”

I nodded and shuffled back to my room where I pulled on my school hoodie and my Uggs, looking out the window at the flurries falling from the sky. I grabbed a scarf and wrapped it around my neck, ready to go. Piper drove us and even ran inside the store and bought it for me since there were other students hanging around. She smiled at me with worry, which didn’t make me feel any better because Piper never worried.

When we got back, I went straight to the bathroom and unwrapped the little stick. I followed the instructions, put the cap back on it, and set it on the sink, setting my phone alarm for three minutes. I sat staring at the shower curtain, thinking about when I’d bought it. It had been a few years now since Piper and I got that place and we’d been so excited to move in, decorate, and make it our own. The shower curtain had Polar Bears all over it, and they were wearing Hawaiian shirts and holding coconuts. Piper said it would be us one day, vacationing in Tahiti. I smiled to myself thinking about the simpler times when we only worried about groceries and grades. I missed that, even though I couldn’t imagine my life anymore without Grant and Ben. Just as the thoughts filtered through my mind, the alarm on my phone buzzed.

I reached over but stopped, pulling my hand back in my lap. This was it, the moment that would determine a whole lot of things for me, a moment that, if the test was positive, would be captured in my brain for the rest of my life. I had always wanted a family, just not with two people I wasn’t allowed to have one with and not when I was almost done with graduate school. I guess babies didn’t care about my schedule, and like it or not, I was going to have to face this head-on. I reached back, my hand shaking, and picked up the test, looking down at the screen. My heart dropped.

“Fuck,” I whispered, staring at the two blue lines on the screen.

I was pregnant, and I had no idea what to do next. I shook my head and hopped up off the counter, walking out to the bed. Piper stood up, her eyes curious, but as soon as she saw my face, she knew. She watched me walk across the room and plop down on the bed next to her. She smiled and rubbed my shoulder.

“Are you okay?”

“Besides there being a human growing inside of me?”

“Yeah, besides that I guess,” she said, half smiling.

“This is impossible,” I said laying back.

“Do you know which one is the father?”

“How would I? I slept with both of them at the same time, and both of them have come inside of me multiple times.” I rubbed my hands over my face. “It would be impossible to know until a DNA test could be done. God, I sound like I belong on one of those raunchy television shows titled, ‘Who’s the Daddy?’”

“You could go crazy and pull someone’s wig off,” Piper laughed.

“I want to pull my own hair out,” I said, sighing.

“What are you going to do?”

I pulled myself up to a sitting position and stared down at the test. I shrugged my shoulders and looked up at her with tears pulling at the corners of my eyes. She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me close, kissing the top of my head. This was not at all in my ten-year plan, and Piper knew that.

“Everything will turn out okay,” Piper said. “You know it will. But that being said, I think you need to go to them and tell the boys as soon as possible. This is not the kind of thing you want to carry the burden of alone if it’s at all possible.”

“Okay,” I said, nodding.

“I’ll go make you some tea, okay?”

“Thanks, Piper,” I said, grabbing her hand as she walked passed.

“Of course,” she replied.

I knew she was right, I had to tell Ben and Grant and hold my breath for their response. I didn’t know what I was going to tell them about what I wanted or didn’t want, but I knew they needed to know. The baby was one of theirs, and to be honest, I didn’t care which one it was. I just wanted them to be there for me. We were all three in a relationship, a not so normal one but a relationship nonetheless, and I should feel comfortable going to them with whatever issues I had. This was a huge issue that affected all of us. I got up and walked over to the dresser, putting down the pregnancy test and picking up the phone.

“Here’s your tea,” Piper said, handing me the warm cup. “I’ll be in the other room if you need me.”

“Thanks, girl,” I said with a half-smile.

I scrolled through and called Grant on a conference call with Ben. Ben didn’t answer, but Grant did. I took a deep breath, wanting to tell them in person, not over the phone.

“Hey, sweetie,” Grant said. “Ben is here with me. We’re at Ben’s house.”

“Oh, okay,” I said, my hands shaking.

“You okay?”

“I need to talk to you guys, both of you,” I said. “And it can’t wait.”

“Okay, but why don’t you meet us at my place? Ben’s is crawling with professors, and it’s too dangerous for you to come here. We will be there in ten,” he said.

“All right. I’ll meet you there.”

I hung up the phone, pulled my hair back in a tight ponytail, wiped the tears from my cheeks, and headed out, kissing Piper on the cheek before leaving. She wished me luck, knowing I was probably going to need it. It was snowing a bit harder, so I took my time getting there, feeling so strange about the fact that there was a person growing inside of me. When I arrived, Grant answered the door and took my coat. His house was nice and warm, and all I could think about was taking a nap on his couch. I had to focus.

“So, I have to tell you guys something I found out about ten minutes ago,” I said, watching as Ben walked in and sat down next to Grant. “I don’t know how to say this easily, so I’m just going to come out with it. I’m pregnant.”

There was silence, dead silence, and Grant’s mouth dropped open while Ben’s head fell, and he put his hands over his face. I shifted nervously in my chair, knowing that I had to give them both a moment to let it sink in. It was big news for me and big news for them. I had to try to understand that.

“Fuck.” Ben stood up and walked over to the windows. “What the fuck are we going to do?”

“Is there any way to tell whose it is?” Grant was kinder in tone.

“Well, not without a DNA test,” I said. “We’ve kind of been haphazard with that kind of thing since we’ve met.”

“We’ve been stupid,” Ben said angrily.

“Ben, take a deep breath. There’s no one here for you to be angry at,” Grant said, watching my face. “Let’s all sit down and talk about this. It doesn’t have to be as complicated as you’re making it out in your head.”

“Have you decided what you’re going to do?” Ben looked at me unkindly.

“What do you mean?”

“Are you going to keep it?”

“Ben, I just got this news, too, and I haven’t gotten that far in my thoughts,” I said with panic.

“I can’t do this,” Ben said, shaking his head and grabbing his coat.

“Ben,” Grant called out as Ben slammed the front door behind him.

“Just let him go,” I said with tears flowing down my cheeks. “This is so messed up. I never meant to get pregnant, I swear. Now that I am, you’re both supposed to be there with this.”

“Aw, sweetie, don’t cry.” Grant bent down next to me and rubbed my back. “Give him some time, and we will figure all of this out, okay? Do you need anything right now?”

“Support,” I said, looking up at him.

“I’m here for you,” he said. “And Ben will come around, I promise.”

“You don’t know that.” I wiped my face. “Look, I appreciate you being so supportive, but I want to be alone. I’m going to go home. I’ll see you tomorrow, so we can do this meeting with everyone.”

“If you decide you don’t want to do it, I’ll understand,” he said, helping me with my jacket.

“No, it has to be done.” I turned and walked from the house.