Harlan

 

Cade’s touch sent waves of fire across my body. I wanted the heat to fuse us together, creating a chemical reaction that could never be broken. We couldn’t seem to get close enough or hold tight enough, as we explored. He lavished all his attention on me with his gentle movements, making me feel like the most precious being in his life. His gentle hands never strayed from me for even a second.

I raked my fingers down his tanned torso, completely lost in the rise and fall of the muscles in his back and the feel of his chest pressed into mine. Never in my life had I ever felt more loved and cherished than I did in Cade’s arms. I thought my heart was going to burst from the sheer emotion of everything. There was nothing I wanted more than to be with him every day and every night for the rest of my life.

I curled into his side, his strong arm surrounding me, pulling me tight until I was sprawled across his chest. For the first time, I got a good look at the tattoo that I’d only gotten glimpses of before. It stretched from the hard mass of his pectoral, over his broad shoulder and down his muscled bicep to his elbow. A gorgeous, intricate design that seemed to fit his personality perfectly. It was amazingly detailed and the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. Thick black lines crisscrossed across his skin. It appeared tribal with its interwoven threads around his shoulder. The more I gazed at the design, I could see the images within the twining marks. An illustration of a Celtic sun just above his pec, with a dragon flowing over his shoulder, and roses flowing between the talons of the beast moving down his bicep. All with dark edges and bold contours that encased the artwork. I traced my fingers along the design, feeling my eyes growing heavy.

“The dragon symbolizes wisdom, strength, and loyalty. The roses represent hope, while the sun stands for life. They’re all qualities I try to possess and share with those around me that I love,” Cade explained.

The image was beautiful before, now it held so much more meaning than I ever realized. “It’s gorgeous,” I whispered, then yawned deeply. I nuzzled into his chest, enjoying the iron grip his arm held around my body.

Cade ran his fingers through my hair, massaging my scalp and relaxing me even more. He kissed the top of my head.

“Sleep, sweetheart,” he whispered. “I love you.”

***

It was morning when I woke, feeling happier and more rested than I ever had in my entire life. Cade laid next to me, his arm still holding me tight to his chest, like he was afraid I would disappear. A dull ache settled in my muscles as I reached up and kissed his cheek. My fingers made tracks from his chest and across the hard plains of his stomach. I traced every muscle on his torso, feathering my fingers down to his growing erection. His resounding moan and the evidence of his arousal excited me.

“If you don’t stop that, this isn’t gonna last very long,” he groaned.

There was nothing else but him—his arm wrapped around me, bringing me with him as he rolled onto his back. His firm grasp curled around me, bringing me up so my face was inches from his. His sweet breath washed over my skin, his lips so close to mine. There was nothing in the world that mattered at that moment, but us. When his fingers made tracks across the smooth skin on my back, I felt like he had set fire to my entire being. My every nerve ending screamed for him.

His hands moved up my arms to my face. He pulled me down to him, a desperate need in his sparkling blue eyes. When our lips finally touched, a low, feral moan erupted from his throat. The sound sent an electric current streaming through my entire body. Suddenly, I couldn’t get close enough, couldn’t move fast enough.

His lips brought me to the brink of euphoria, and repeatedly retreated until I was ready to lose my mind. My heart built and expanded with every caress of his hands and nip of his lips. This man was going to drive me crazy. I couldn’t do anything but thrash against him, the sensuality of his touch almost painful as he built me up until I shattered.

I’d never known this kind of pure love and desire until Cade entered my world. I could taste his scent on my tongue, feel the rough and perfectly flawed fingers as they moved over my sensitive skin. Everything felt different, pure and perfect in every conceivable way. I didn’t think it was possible to love anyone as much as I loved this man.

***

The loud knock on the door surprised me. It was Wednesday afternoon, and I was waiting for Cade to pick Dillon and me up for dinner. Since our weekend getaway, we had spent every single day together. We were no longer hiding our relationship from Dillon, not that he acted any different than he did before.

Cade no longer knocked on the door, so when I heard another knock, I became confused. Who would come to visit without letting me know they were coming? Realization dawned when I thought about Bobby just walking across the parking lot. Maybe he needed help in the bar or something. I’d gone over to keep an eye on things a few times, so he could run out for supplies, perhaps that’s who it was.

“Hey,” I started, but it wasn’t Bobby. Instead of seeing a friend, I was confronted by a face that brought back every bad memory from my past in one instant. I hadn’t seen this man since the day he threw me out of his office and told me he never wanted to see me again. Conall MacArthur.

I stood there, frozen, too afraid to move for a moment. The realization that Dillon was inside napping was enough for me to push out the door and pull it closed behind me. I didn’t want this man in my house or anywhere near my son.

“What do you want? I’m busy,” I said with such disdain, I couldn’t hide the fury in my tone.

Conall stood in front of me for the first time since he threw Dillon and me away all those years ago. As a naïve seventeen-year-old girl, I thought I was in love. I believed everything this man, two decades my senior, told me. He said he loved me and that he was going to leave his wife for me. I knew just how immature I was back then. Regardless of my adolescent beliefs, when he threw me out of his office without allowing me to tell him about Dillon, he made me feel like a piece of trash. Between Conall and the way my aunts treated me, I felt like I was disposable; not worth anything to anyone. It took me years to find my confidence again. I built myself up, and with Dillon, I knew I was worthy of love. But only since meeting Cade did I finally feel like myself again. He healed the part of me that I thought Conall destroyed.

“I was in the neighborhood, and wanted to see how you are doing,” he said. “It’s been a few years.”

“In the neighborhood? Are you crazy? I don’t know why you’re here, but I have nothing to say to you. You need to leave.” My hands shook with barely contained rage. I started to turn around, but he grabbed my arm and stopped me. Ice ran through my veins, and I was suddenly sick to my stomach at his touch. So many bitter memories, so many hurt feelings, and sadness washed over me.

Conall wasn’t a big man, his average height and gangling frame made him nothing special. His brown hair and darker eyes were dull, almost lifeless. I stared at this man, and couldn’t find whatever had attracted me all those years ago. What had happened to him that made him look almost dead inside? I felt bad for a split second before hatred and anger filled my veins. He had no business here.

“Leave,” I demanded angrily before turning to go back inside to lock him out of my world forever.

“I’m not going anywhere until I see my son.”

I was petrified. Who told him about Dillon? Then I remembered my cousin, she knew. She must have told him. When he threw me out of his office and refused to see me when I tried to tell him I was pregnant, I swore I would never let him in our life again.

I kept my back to him, trying desperately to hide my fear. I yanked my arm away from his grasp easily, but my guts twisted and turned, and my whole body shook with terrified rage. Slowly, I turned back to him and tried to school my features, so he couldn’t see my worry. “What do you want, Conall? I haven’t heard from you in almost five years. What could you possibly want to hunt me down for now?”

“Look, I heard you had a kid. He’s mine, isn’t he? That day you came to my office, you tried to tell me, and I kicked you out and told you never to come back.”

“I don’t know what you want from me,” I said. He grabbed my arm and pulled me to the chairs that sat right outside my door and sat in front of me, blocking my exit.

“I just want to know my son,” Conall said. His voice sounded almost sad, but I couldn’t bring myself to feel bad for him. With Conall, there was always an angle. There had to be a reason he was here, beyond wanting to see Dillon.

“You have a son, in Ireland. Besides,” I said, instantly making my decision. “He isn’t your son.”

“Then who is his father?” he asked, anger crossing his face. A face I barely recognized. He looked so much older now than he had only five years ago. He was twenty years older than me. Five years ago, it was hard to believe he was thirty-seven. He was athletic, and he took care of himself. He was a force which swept into my life when I needed someone to help me pick up the pieces of my parents’ death. But now, he was a shadow of his former self, and the years had not been kind.

“That is none of your business. Our lives are none of your business. You made that choice years ago when you decided to throw me out of your office.”

“I’ll sue you for a paternity test,” Conall threatened. “You can’t keep him from me. He’s an Irish citizen. I’ll have him brought back to Ireland, and you’ll never see him again.”

“No, my son is an American citizen, born to an American mother who happened to live in Ireland for a while.”

Conall sighed. “I don’t want to argue, Harlan. Please, I just came to see you and to meet our son. I’m sorry I threw you out that day. You must have felt so alone.”

“No.” I paused. “You need to leave. You don’t get to come here and try to apologize and think everything will be fine. You don’t get to demand things you have no right to. That’s not how it works.” I wasn’t about to admit just how alone I felt when he threw me out of his office. I hated thinking about how weak I was at that time. Days I cried, and for what? A pathetic cheater who never loved me.

“I’m not leaving until I get some answers. I screwed up, should I be punished forever for a mistake I made five years ago?”

I narrowed my eyes at him, glaring. “My son is none of your business,” I said as forcefully as I could. “We all have to live with our pasts, good or bad. Your issues are not mine, I won’t be saddled with your regrets.”

“I’m sorry, Harlan. I fecked up. I shouldn’t have treated you that way. I should have left my wife like I told you I would. We could have been a family. I’m so sorry, Harlan. Let me find a way to make it up to you. Anything you want. Please. At least tell me his name.”

What do you say to that? What do you say to the man who ripped out your heart? I knew deep down he wouldn’t leave his wife for me, I was just a kid, and god only knows what my life would have been like if I had stayed there. Then I realized almost instantly, I didn’t want to know. I didn’t want to know because I was proud of who I became. I was proud of how hard I’d worked and of all my accomplishments. I’d done well for myself, on my own. My son was an amazing and smart little boy, and that was because of me. My whole body trembled as I thought about what he was saying. I managed to pick myself up, dust myself off, and make a real life for myself and my son, despite him.

“You were never going to leave your wife. I was better off on my own.”

“Just his name, Harlan. Please.”

Sighing, I gave in, hoping he would leave with this little bit of information. “His name is Dillon. Now you need to go.”

Pausing, I thought about what else I wanted to say, but before I could even begin, the crunch of tires signaled someone crossing the parking lot. Cade’s big black truck pulled up slowly and it was at that moment that I realized my hands were still in Conall’s. I yanked my hands from his, sick with worry.

Cade climbed, slowly and deliberately, out of his truck, eyeing the man sitting next to me. He didn’t say a word as he came up to us, but I could almost feel the anger rolling from him. He rose to his full height, and his muscles were bunched, like he was ready to strike at any moment.

“Who’s this?” Conall asked.

Bloody hell. Bloody fecking hell.

I stood, approaching Cade who looked more furious by the second. “What’s goin’ on?” he asked, never once looking at me. He glared at Conall, waiting for a response.

“Come on, let’s go inside and get ready for dinner.” I placed my hands on his hard, unrelenting chest, hoping to keep him with me. “I’ll explain everything.”

“Who the feck is this, Harlan?” Conall questioned, like he had any right. He stood, like he was going to intimidate someone.

I turned back to Conall and glared. “You need to leave. Now. You have no business here.”

“I want to see my son,” Conall all but growled.

Cade stared down at me, his blue eyes were wide and stormed with anger. I could only imagine what was happening in his head, what he thought he saw when he pulled up, what he thought was happening.

I stayed in front of him, and placed my hands in his. “Come inside with me,” I said gently. “I’ll explain everything. Please, Cade.” He stepped with me, but he was still focused on Conall.

“Yeah, Cade. Go on inside with the little lady,” Conall mocked.

“What’s this about, asshole?” Cade snarled. He stopped moving with me, but he didn’t pull away. He glowered at Conall. “The lady told you to leave. You don’t fuckin’ belong here.”

“She’s a friend, and that’s my kid.” Conall stepped forward and did something I never expected. His right arm swung, connecting with Cade’s left cheek.

Cade barely flinched. He released my hands, and clenched his fists. He stood by my side, unmoving, but his coiled stance and severe, narrowed eyes showed he was quickly losing his temper.

“She’s not your friend. I know Harlan’s friends,” Cade snarled, barely controlling his anger. He breathed deeply, glaring at Conall with such hatred I feared what would happen if Cade lost control. His chest rose and fell with each breath.

“Fecking prick,” Conall spewed. “You don’t know anything. Tell ‘im Harlan. Tell ‘im you’re coming home with me.”

“No way in hell,” I snapped. “I’m not going anywhere with you.” I moved to stand in front of Cade, my back pressed into his chest. I knew what I wanted but when Cade placed his unclenched hands on my hips, it gave me the strength I needed to voice it. “I’m in love with Cade. He’s the father my son needs. Go back to Ireland, Conall.”

“Harlan,” Conall whined. “At least talk to me. Alone.”

“She told you to go, and you refuse,” Cade growled deeply. “I’ll ask you once more. Why the fuck are you here? What’s your angle?”

“I… I left my wife. I came to get Harlan back.”

Now I was pissed. I started to step away from Cade, but his hands were vice grips on my hips. “Get me back? Why the hell would you think I would ever want you back? I was just a kid.”

“You need to get back in your car and get the next flight back to Ireland,” Cade growled. “There’s nothin’ here for you.”

Conall turned his attention to me. “Harlan, is he my son? I don’t want to take him from you, we both know I couldn’t raise him by myself even if I wanted. We both know my wife raised my son. I just want to know if I made the biggest mistake of my life by kicking you out of my office.”

I was completely unsure of what I should say. For some reason, I believed him. “Yes, I came to your office that day to tell you that I was pregnant. But that wasn’t the worst mistake of your life, your worst mistake was cheating on your wife and leaving her. You need to go home and fix things with your family.”

“Can I see him?” Conall asked, his voice practically begging.

Cade growled again, I thought for sure he would hit Conall this time.