Chapter Ten
Noah
I LOOK AT Lauren, who fell asleep while we were watching Harry Potter after our first date, and feel something I haven’t felt in a long time. Is that my heart swelling … with happiness? The movie ends and Lauren is still sleeping. Carefully, I move away and make sure she’s comfortable, covering her with a blanket. Should I leave? I don’t want to, as odd as that is.
The recliner chair is good enough for the night. TV goes off, I sit, and close my eyes, not falling deep asleep but dozing off. Around midnight, Lauren wakes up.
“I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” she says groggily. Her eyes meet mine and I can’t help but smile.
“It’s okay. I can only assume you’re tired. You’re growing a person and all.”
“Yeah, no big deal, just creating life.” She sits up. “You didn’t have to stay.”
“I didn’t want to leave you,” I blurt. “I can’t lock the door behind me. That’s not safe.”
“Oh, right. Thanks. Do you want to stay the night?”
Stay the night? With her? Hells yes. “I thought you said no sex.”
“I did, and I didn’t mean it that way. It’s late, and you’re here…” She looks into my eyes again.
“Then yeah.”
She leads the way to her bedroom. “I have an extra toothbrush. I’ll set it out for you.”
“Thanks,” I tell her and get ready for bed, striping down to just my boxers. Lauren is in bed when I come into her room. Her eyes widen as she looks at me, eyes slowly trailing over my body. Then she closes her eyes and looks away. Trying to resist temptation, is she?
I won’t tempt her—because really I’d be tempting myself. She’s tired and needs extra rest, right? Shit.
Before I know it, I’m in bed with Lauren Winters. Again. Though, this time nothing is going to happen. My leg touches Lauren’s as I try to get comfortable. Her skin is soft and warm and instantly turns me on. I want to feel more of it, to run my hand up that smooth calf, past her thigh and—stop. Dealing with an erection while next to Lauren in bed isn’t something I want to do right now. With a huff, I roll over, moving as far away from Lauren as I can without falling off the bed.
Lauren stretches her arm, fingers brushing my bicep. I tense. There is no way I can sleep like this when all I can think about is parting Lauren’s legs and diving in between.
“Can you, uh, move over?” I ask.
“It’s okay if you touch me,” she says. “But not like that,” she adds before I can make a pass. There is no middle ground. If I’m touching Lauren, it’s leading to something. I bring my arms close to my body, figuring I’ll just stay like that until I fall asleep. Lauren laughs. “You’ve never just literally slept in bed with someone before, have you?”
“Nope,” I tell her. “I’ve never stayed the night with someone like this either. Especially someone I’m attracted to. This is weird.”
Lauren laughs again and moves her pillow, scooting closer to me. “Here,” she says and rests her head on my chest. I swallow hard, feeling something rise inside me, something other than desire.
“I don’t like to cuddle,” I say out loud. “But this is nice.” It feels right. Holding Lauren like this, innocently, softly, brings me a sense of content I never thought I’d feel. “Your no-sex rules includes blowjobs, doesn’t it?” I ask, joking. Though I wouldn’t turn one down.
“Sorry to disappoint, but yeah, those are out.”
“That’s what I thought. Just checking.” My eyes close and I rest my head against hers. “Have you told anyone else?”
“No. I want to wait until the first trimester is over. Which is only about a month away now.”
“Fuck, that sounds scary. I thought we had more time to figure this parent shit out.”
She chuckles. “I don’t know if I ever will.”
“You’ll be a good mom.”
“I hope so.”
She doesn’t return it with a “you’ll be a good dad.” Because she doesn’t know. I want to be angry with her, but I share her doubt.
“There’s a lot I don’t know,” she says.
“I don’t think anyone is fully ready. We’ll get it. Together.”
She holds me tighter. “Together. I like that.”
Oh, Lauren … if only you knew how much I’ve wanted to be together, what I would have given to make you mine.
*
My arms are still around Lauren when I wake up. Her dogs have joined us in bed, and we’re all crammed together like one big happy family. I’m uncomfortable, and the arm Lauren is laying on is all pins and needles, but I don’t dare move.
I kind of love this.
“Morning,” I say to Lauren when she opens her eyes. Her hair is a mess and there are pillow crease along her cheek. I reach over and brush her hair out of her face.
“Morning,” she says back and runs her hand up my arm. “This is a different kind of waking up together.”
“Very different. Is that bad?”
She smiles. “Not at all.”
I kiss her forehead. “Good.”
We stay wrapped up together for a few more minutes, then Lauren gets up to use the bathroom. After, she lets the dogs out and offers to make breakfast. I go into the kitchen with her, and together we make pancakes and eggs.
“This is new to you too, isn’t it?” she asks when we sit at the table.
“Eating breakfast with someone? Yeah, it is. But it’s nice. I would say I should have done this years ago, but I probably wouldn’t have had it with you.”
She smiles and a bit of color rushes to her cheeks. “Are you busy today?”
I shake my head. “I usually go to the gym with Colin in the morning on the weekend, but I’ve been avoiding him.”
Lauren chuckles. “He won’t stay mad at you forever.”
“We’ll see. Are you busy the rest of today?”
“No.”
“Do you want to do something together?”
Her smile returns. “I would like that. Any ideas?”
“I don’t care as long as it’s with you.”
*
“This counts as our second date, right?” I ask Lauren. We dropped her dogs off at the dog park—doggie day care is a real thing and Lauren utilizes it all the time—and stopped for lunch at a small diner. “It should, and then I’ll only have to take you out one more time until I get some.”
Lauren laughs, grabbing a French fry. “I change it to three formal dates then.”
“What, this isn’t fancy enough for you? Come on, I’ll take you to Taco Bell tonight. Bam. Three dates done and over with and we can make another baby.”
She laughs again and shakes her head. “That’s not funny. And don’t tempt me, Noah.”
I wiggle my eyebrows. “So you’re thinking about it.”
“I’m thinking about tacos, not it.”
“Liar.”
She purses her lips. “Fine. I might be thinking about it, but only because of hormones.”
I lean back and run my hands over my chest. “You want this.”
“Stop it!” she laughs and looks around. “People can see you!”
“Right, right. I don’t want to tempt those old ladies over there.”
“Hey, I hear they give pretty good blowjobs when they take out their dentures.”
I wrinkle my nose. “Gross.”
She reaches for her lemonade, laughing. I like this, the laid-back time together, talking and laughing and just being ourselves. I don’t have to put on a show for Lauren. I’m just me. I’ve never been this comfortable around anyone.
The rest of the day is just as easy going, and we spend the evening watching movies. Halfway through the second Harry Potter movie—and, yes, these movies are fucking awesome—Lauren rests her head on my shoulder. I wrap my arms around her and pull her close, stretching out on the couch so that we are both laying down.
“You can lay on your stomach, right?” I ask, suddenly worried she’s going to hurt our baby.
Fuck, that sounds weird. Our baby.
“Yeah. I can for a while. And the baby is like the size of a grape right now. Very small.”
“Oh, good. When can you feel it move?”
“From what I read, about halfway through.”
“It’s like a little alien inside you.”
“Hah, it feels like it sometimes. Well, not the movement parts obviously, but the part where it’s sucking all my energy.”
I’ve had so much fun with Lauren all day, enjoying her company, that I didn’t think about the reason we were together. Now that I’m thinking about babies again, my head is spinning. I hold tighter onto Lauren, anchoring myself. “Do you want a girl or a boy?”
“I don’t care as long as it’s healthy. What about you?”
“I don’t know care either, though I think it’s a girl.”
Lauren lifts her head off my chest and looks into my eyes. “I wonder who he or she will look like.”
“This is so weird,” I blurt. What’s even weirder is my imagination getting ahead of me, and I’m seeing this play out like it was planned, like Lauren loves me as much as I’ve loved her, and we’re ready and excited to embark on this stage of life together.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
“It is.” Lauren lays her head back down and turns her attention back to the movie. I run my hands up and down her arms, bare skin under my fingers. Goosebumps break out along her flesh, so I sit up to grab the blanket that’s on the back of the couch. We resituate close together, blanket draped over us both.
Lauren turns, probably to say something to me, but I don’t give her the chance. I move in, putting my lips to hers. Time stops and it’s just us, just this kiss.
I can’t get close enough.
I can’t stop kissing her.
It’s like I’m that sixteen-year-old boy, feeling the effects of teenage love at first sight all over again, ten years later.
Only this time, she’s feeling it too.
Lauren moves into my lap, straddling me. We kiss with fury, and soon I’m laying her down on the couch, moving between her legs. She rakes her nails down my back and grabs the hem of my shirt, yanking it up halfway then stopping.
“Noah,” she groans. “We … we … oh fuck.”
My lips are on her neck, and she likes it. Really likes it. Her legs widen and wrap around me.
“Noah,” she starts again and puts her hands on either side of my head. “We shouldn’t do this.”
I let out a breath and nod. “Okay, if that’s what you want.”
“It’s what I need,” she whispers. “I want you.”
Worst possible words, Lauren. Thanks for that. With great control, I move off of her, and we cuddle together again. If Lauren wants three dates, I’ll wait. Hell, I’ll wait if she wants thirty dates. I’ll do whatever it takes.