Sophie

Quinn and Lola sit on the large sectional couch in my apartment, wearing matching tiaras and grins as we watch a movie.

“I really needed this,” Quinn says, placing her hand on my arm and giving it a small squeeze. “Can you believe this is the first time I’ve been away from Jaxson since he was born?”

“How are you holding up?” I ask, remembering how difficult it had been the first time I’d left Noah.

She chuckles, whispering so that Lola can’t hear her. “I miss him like crazy. Is that bad?”

“It’s normal,” I say. “When I had to leave...” I stop myself from uttering the words I was about to say, swallowing hard.

Quinn’s lips draw down, but she just turns her attention back to the movie, pulling Lola against her side and kissing the top of her head.

I don’t think Kade has told his family about Noah, and I’m grateful for that. But Quinn is smart, and I doubt my small slipup went unnoticed.

“Okay, monkey,” I say to Lola when the movie is over. “Time for bed.”

After a bit of protesting, and a dozen hugs and kisses from Quinn, I finally get her into bed.

“One song, please, Sophie,” Lola begs, sitting up in bed, tossing back the comforter.

“It’s already an hour past your bedtime,” I say, but I pick up my guitar and strum a few chords anyway, knowing she won’t give up until I sing her at least one bedtime song.

“Just a short one?” Lola folds her hands in front of her face, pleading with big puppy dog eyes.

God, I love the kid so much already.

“Okay, just one,” I say, changing chords, and start to play a rendition of Eugene Field’s poem, Wynken, Blynken, and Nod.

“So, shut your eyes while Mother sings, of wonderful sights that be, and you shall see the beautiful things as you rock in the misty sea.”  

It’s a song I used to sing to Noah.

My voice cracks a couple times on the words.

Lola lays back down, her eyes starting to grow heavy as I finally finish the last chorus.

I lean my guitar against the wall, then kiss Lola’s forehead. “Sophie,” she says when I turn off her light.

“Yeah?”

“I wish we could do this every night.”

My chest squeezes, because I do, too. But Kade and I haven’t spoken about the future. There’s still so many things we haven’t talked about.

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” I say, shutting the door.

“You’re so good with her,” Quinn says when I sit down on the couch beside her. “She really loves you. So does my brother.”

My cheeks warm, because it’s not a word we’ve said to each other. And while at times I believe he cares about me as much as I do him, sometimes I feel like he’s still holding back.

But then, so am I.

“I love them, too,” I admit.

“I know,” she says, grinning at me. “It’s obvious.”

I can’t help the frown that tugs at my lips.

“That scares you,” Quinn says.

“Yeah.”

She nods in understanding. “I know we don’t know each other well. And you’re clearly a private person. But I’m here if you need to talk.”

“It’s just...” I swallow hard. “My life is complicated, and there are things...”

“That Kade doesn’t know about you,” Quinn offers, sympathy in her dark eyes.

I nod.

“Speaking from experience,” she says, pulling her legs under herself and turning towards me. “Secrets always come out.”

“I know. There are just some things that are hard to talk about.”

“Whatever it is, my brother is probably the most understanding man I’ve ever met. You can trust him.”

I know that, too. And maybe that scares me the most. Because he deserves so much better than I can give him. He and Lola both do.

The front door opens and Kade comes in, a deep frown tugging at his beautiful lips. When his gaze lands on me, I know immediately that something is wrong.

“We were just talking about you,” Quinn says, oblivious to the tension that rolls off of him.

“Where’s Lola?” he asks me, ignoring her, his eyes hard, cold, and full of suspicion like they’d been the first night he’d found me here.

“Sl-sleeping,” I stutter, not sure why I’m suddenly nervous.

“What’s wrong?” Quinn asks, standing.

His jaw bunches and tenses, and his nostrils flare.

He’s angry. At me. Automatically, my walls go up.

Finally, he looks at Quinn. “I need to speak with Sophie.”

“Okay.” Her brows are raised as she looks between us. “I’ll go.”

Kade doesn’t say another word until Quinn is gone, and I flinch when the door shuts behind her.

Those dark brown eyes, the ones that have the power to undo me, lock on mine, and there’s accusation there. I feel it in my bones. Like the connection between us has been severed in two.

And when he opens his mouth to speak, I know my world is about to be shattered once again.

“Who the hell are you, Sophie?”