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Benjamin
3 months prior…
The Shenanigans of Gorilla Ben and a Hottie named Rosie
Vol. 3
By E. Loves
Closing Chapter…
Gorilla Ben was gone. Rosie checked from daylight to dark for days and couldn’t find him. He wasn’t one to leave, especially not her. If he was to run somewhere, he’d take her with him. Only he hadn’t. Rosie knew in her heart something was wrong.
Only where could he be?
She worried something bad must have happened. She didn’t know where to go or where to even look but sitting and waiting seemed equally terrifying if something truly had happened to him.
Not many liked him that she knew.
He had many enemies, many threats.
She cried while she ran into the endless jungle in search of a gorilla man that might not be found. Her feet hurt, but her heart hurt worse.
_____
Gorilla Ben awoke in a white room. His head swam, and his eyes hurt from the bright lights. Something spoke, but he couldn’t see anyone in the room with him.
He stood up, glanced around, and saw no Rosie. So, he grew angry, and he grew big. More voices spoke. He roared and punched the white walls. Nothing came from it.
He sunk down to his knees and thought of Rosie. Oh, how he missed her. His mind grew heavy with thoughts of her being hurt. He couldn’t protect her here. He had no idea where she was. No idea where he was.
That made him terribly sad, and angry, and completely at the mercy of the white room.
But as always, his worry was for that of human Rosie than it was of himself.
Please be safe, my human.
My Rosie.
I’ll get out. And we’ll be together again.
To be continued…
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Reviews:
*****
OMG!! I think Rosie realizes her own feelings. Or am I wrong?
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*****
Man, this is good. I don’t even know why it’s good. I just want their friendship to go further than it is… Will it happen now that Rosie lost her Gorilla Ben? And what’s going to happen to him??? Can’t wait to find out!
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***
The story’s dragging, but I’m still holding on for Rosie and Ben to realize their feelings. The author writes in such a way that it should be obvious, and IT IS, to everyone but them.
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These readers were feeling my pain from a lifetime of being friends with Rosie. Everyone BUT her realized how good we were together. I was even envious of Gorilla Ben because at least he didn’t seem to know the extent of his feelings for Rosie yet. That he was crazy in love with her. Probably would always be. And what made it worse was Rosie loved him too. Just not like Ben loved her.
Rosie likely loved him in the way Emily loved me—like a best friend or an anchor that kept her safe. Hell, she told me I was her safe place.
Maybe her publishing this series wasn’t such a good idea after all. It was making me think about us all the time and the possibilities… I was moving in with her today. I was getting ready to leave Mom and Dad’s house. I got in last night but decided to come here and see them, so I could break the news to Mom that I was moving in with Emily. She hated that idea, of course, but she couldn’t stop me.
She just hovered and never stopped nitpicking every little thing about Emily.
Nothing was going to prevent me from moving in with her. My head swam once more with possibilities. Possibilities that could lead to destroying our friendship if I said or did the wrong thing. Possibilities that could break my heart if I was rejected. Possibilities that would forever stay locked away in my head so that I could be her safe place, and she could just be in my world.
Even though she could easily be the center of it.
Not that she wasn’t already.
_____
I checked for more reviews on my way up to the apartment. I liked reading them. I enjoyed reading the positive feedback she got back from her writing because it made me proud, and I knew it made her happy too.
She had the door unlocked, so I just stepped on in. Her head popped up from the fridge, and her smile caught me right in the chest. I hadn’t seen her since Christmas, but the sight of her always did me in, no matter what. Her stringy curls were up off her neck, and she wore a pair of loose, gray shorts and a white T-shirt.
She looked so laid back and fucking irresistible. This would be my view from now on. HELL, YEAH! This was going to be one of those tortures you couldn’t help but enjoy. I could deal with it. I’d been doing it for years already. My attraction to her faded during different times of my life, but never completely, and it always came back stronger than it was before.
This strong, however, was definitely going to kill me.
“Hey, where’re your things?” she asked me.
“Still need to unload it from the truck,” I replied. “Have you been doing squats?”
She actually blushed. “Please, leave my butt alone. Why is that the first thing you wanna bring up every time we see each other after months apart!?”
I flashed my teeth. “I’m just saying.” She felt her forehead quickly in a way that was strange but cute. “Are you getting sick on me?”
Her eyes widened, and she squawked, “No, I’m not. At least I don’t think so.”
“You’re red in the face and you just cupped your forehead,” I pointed out.
“Oh.” She turned away from me and shrugged her hand to the side. “You’re not wearing your glasses.”
“Thought it’d be easier to move with my contacts instead of my glasses falling off my nose.”
“Let me get my shoes on and I’ll help.” She ran behind me and slipped on some flip-flops by the front door.
I smiled. “All right but we’re heading out once we bring everything up. I can unpack once we get back.”
Her nose wrinkled. I grinned.
Needless to say, it was a challenge getting my mattress up two flights of stairs with Emily as my only help. The rails I let her carry one at a time while I carried up the headboard. She was useless if I were honest, but her huffing and complaining had me grinning, nonetheless.
Okay, nothing was truly a chore when I had Emily around to look at and talk to.
_____
“Peanut butter and jelly, really Emily?” I drove my truck, and she sat in the passenger side next to me. Our windows were down, and her smile was contagious.
“What? I like PB&J sandwiches.” She straightened her back out and gazed over at me.
“Me too, but we’re not living off them. We’re gonna have to stop at the grocery store on the way home.”
There was a malevolent twitch in her eyes every time we had a conversation that revolved around money. “Okay there, Benjamin, not all of us receive handouts from our parents, and we have to make do with what we can afford.” She let her eyes roam over me completely and literally snubbed her nose at me. “Spoiled ass.” Then she turned her head toward the window.
I was smirking as I said, “Jesus, woman, can’t I want to feed us good food without you getting offended by my parent’s money?”
She was being petty. “No.”
“I’ll have you know, this spoiled ass goes to work Monday.” I glanced back and forth between her and the road to see if she’d turn around to look at me. “I already promised Dad I would. Not that it mattered. It doesn’t sound bad at all when I think about settling down in the future.”
When she didn’t respond, I added, “Imagine all that food money I’ll be making for us.”
Although I couldn’t see her smile, something told me she was. “Where are you taking us, anyway?” She finally looked at me again.
“You’ll see.” If I told her, she wouldn’t have come.
We were quiet for a minute.
“So, we can eat twenty dollar steaks every night?” There was humor in her voice.
I laughed. “Don’t get too crazy now, we gotta put a taco night in there somewhere.”
She groaned. “This conversation is making me hungry.”
I pulled into one of Dad’s dealerships and she frowned. “What are we doing here, Benjamin? I told you no already.”
I ignored her and cut off the engine. “Just take a loaner until you find you one, that’s all.” Lie.
I knew this whole situation made her uncomfortable. She hated the idea of having to take from me. But I didn’t see it like that at all. I always wanted to help her, she knew this, much to her annoyance sometimes, but I wasn’t ever going to change.
I didn’t want to take away her independence either, only wanted to help her along with it. It was only a matter of time before she’d be able to quit Crash’s for writing full-time. It might not be Gorilla Ben and Rosie that made that happen, but she’d write something that would be the one that would let her hobby become a full-time job. I was optimistic, and I’d annoy the shit out of her until it happened.
So, I guess I was pushy too.
“No.”
No wasn’t going to work on me. I stepped out of the truck and walked over to her side. She locked the door, and I unlocked it with my key. She glared. I showed my teeth. I took her hand and held it tight in mine as I helped her out of the car.
“Wait, Benjamin.” She grabbed my hand that held hers and met my eyes with panic. “Just let me use your truck for now, and you can use one of the loaners. Just until I find myself something.” She took a deep breath and immediately looked better. “There, I asked you for help. I don’t know how long it will take, but I’ll try to save up quickly.”
I never thought to give her mine. “Okay.” She sighed in relief and released my hand, but I tightened my hold on hers. “Let’s go pick me out a new ride.”
She rolled her eyes. “You’re so obnoxious.”
All I could think about though was how she let me hold her hand.
Thirty minutes later, after gauging her reaction to every vehicle in the parking lot, I decided on the green Ford Raptor. She wouldn’t give me any opinions on what she thought I should get, so instead, I had to watch her for a reaction as we walked through every vehicle in the lot until I saw the look she had while looking at the truck.
So, I got it. I tossed her the keys to my truck—let’s just call it mine even though I wouldn’t ever take it from her and went inside while she waited outside.
Dad was in his office. There were several closed-off offices throughout the building for his dealers so that they could deal with families alone—giving them privacy. He looked up from paperwork. “Did she find herself something?”
“She’s just gonna use my truck. I’m going to take the green Raptor off the lot for myself.” I grinned, and he shook his head.
“I just got that one in too.” He sighed.
“This is better though, she’s more comfortable with the idea of using mine than taking one from the lot.” He nodded. “Besides, I saw her reaction to the truck. She loves it. I’ll just let her drive it when she wants.”
He tilted his head and considered something. “Good bunch, her and her dad. Nolan sure straightened up. Never saw him come out of the house while he drank. Good company, too.” I just looked at him because I had no idea why he was talking about Emily’s dad. “Junior,” he started, and I already dreaded whatever it was he was going to say. “You ever going to tell her how you feel?”
“I don’t want to talk about this.”
“You need to talk about it. You’re invested in her so much—heart and soul—seems like.” Didn’t I know it. “Feelings like that…that get a chance to fester and grow through the years are just like anger. You hold it in too long, you’re gonna eventually burst, and you can’t predict the outcome when it happens.”
“I got it perfectly under control.”
“I don’t think you do.”
Truthfully, neither did I.
______
Emily
“Get in the buggy, Emily,” Benjamin practically growled behind me. With the authoritative tone and his already deep voice, my stomach swam with a million butterflies.
Being around Benjamin was like a whole new experience, one I didn’t know if I could master. I was strangely nervous and aware of every little thing he did or said whether it was his movements or the way he grabbed my hand.
He gestured toward the shopping cart in his hand, and I frowned. “I’m not getting in there, so you can stroll me around. What are we, twelve?”
He arched a dark eyebrow. “Could be. You haven’t gotten any taller since then.”
I ignored that comment and folded my hands underneath my chest. “I’m hungry. Let’s not leave until the buggy’s full since you’re buying.”
He peeked at me from the corner of his eye. “Says the one that was just complaining earlier about—”
“Ben?” a soft voice asked. We both looked forward and saw Kelly walking toward us. “I didn’t realize I’d see you this quick. Your mom told me you were coming home this week. I had made plans to come see you.” I stiffened.
“Hey, Kelly,” he said kindly. “It’s been a long time.”
She smiled. “It has.” She glanced my way with another smile. “Hey, Emily.”
“I haven’t seen you at Crash’s in a while,” I responded in kind, even when I felt strangely uncomfortable at Benjamin seeing his first everything in years.
“You’re still working there, I see.” Her words seemed nothing more than friendly, so I didn’t think she was trying to be rude. “I also heard you published a book online.”
“Three actually. It’s a series. It’s entertaining as hell, and I’ll have you know the hero of the story is me,” he said it proudly.
I snorted, strangely embarrassed. “It’s not you, you. I just took bits and pieces of your personality and used them to write him.”
“Same thing.” He shrugged his shoulders and smirked at me.
“I see that you two haven’t changed, always together.” She gripped the shopping cart.
“We’re rooming together,” Benjamin stated.
Her eyes widened. “I had no idea. Your mom never told me.”
“Because I just moved in today,” he said at ease.
She was clearly upset with this news. I had a feeling she had been waiting for him to return home if she had been talking to Faith about it. The thought was stressing. Benjamin wasn’t giving her the chance to make a move though, and I hated that it relieved me.
I never thought about it until now. When he dated, he’d bring her back to our apartment where I’d be too. I’d have to watch and hear things that made me sick to my stomach just thinking about it.
My idea of sharing him with a wife no longer seemed appealing. It made my blood run hot just letting the thought cross my mind. I was weird, and I hated myself for it, but I couldn’t make the thoughts or feelings go away.
Day one together was already so different from how we used to be. Only it was just me that was different. My Benjamin was the same. I grabbed my head and rubbed my forehead. Benjamin saw me do it. “Are you sure you’re not getting sick?” he asked for the second time today. The first time was because I felt flustered around him, this time it was Kelly and my thoughts making me uncomfortable and heated.
“Just tired, I think.”
“Well, let’s get this over with so we can leave,” he said. “We’ll see you around, Kelly.”
He said “we” instead of “I” and I was pleased that he was grouping us together, leaving her no room to ask for his number or something.
“Yeah sure.” She looked disappointed with the outcome, and I didn’t feel sorry. In fact, I was so relieved when we went into the next aisle away from her.
“I think she wanted you to ask her out,” I said softly as I tossed some sandwich meat into the cart.
“I’m sure she’ll get around to it.”
I frowned. He was right.
We finished our grocery shopping in silence mostly, Benjamin must have mistaken my surly mood for me feeling bad because he didn’t seem to notice. He placed the groceries in his truck and stood by the one I was using, waiting for me to start it up. His protective nature soothed some of my frostiness. “You know, I’ve been driving just fine all this time without your hovering.”
“You know you’ve missed it.” I smiled at his teasing. “You’re carrying precious cargo, I have to make sure you’re careful all the time.”
I snorted. “I promise I’ll be careful with your baby.” I meant his truck.
“I was referring to you, goofy.” He tapped the inside of the door and stepped away from my window.
This was Benjamin. My best friend Benjamin. His coddling was nothing new, but why was my damn heart pounding? How many times did I have to go through these same lines in my head each day?
Never mind. I was going to continue to ignore it. Best not to even let the truth cross the mind.
“Be careful,” he added, and I quickly rolled up the window.
Two words from him, and I was already thinking of all the things I said I shouldn’t.