CHAPTER TWELVE
Serena surprised them both by not hesitating at all before she softly pressed her lips against his. Heat instantly enveloped her, both from his hands tightening on her waist and the sparks that shot from just one sweet kiss. She hadn’t forgotten the pleasure of being in his arms at the frat party. And still, she was stunned by the intensity of her attraction to him.
“Again.”
His request was deep and hungry. And it was her own hunger for him—and pure feminine instinct—that sent her hands up from his chest to twine around his neck. Her mouth had barely touched his again when his lips came crashing down onto hers.
His groan, her gasp, they were both one hundred percent pleasure at a kiss that was at once rough yet sweet, possessive yet gentle. And when he moved one hand from her waist up to cradle her cheek, she felt warm and cherished as he slowly angled her jaw so that he could take the kiss deeper.
His tongue slicked out across her lower lip, leaving a sensual path of fire in its wake. One that could only be quenched by another taste, and then when that wasn’t enough, the slow slide of his tongue against hers.
Desire crashed into her just as his mouth had, exploding at the tips of her breasts and the vee between her legs. She felt hot, desperate, achy.
Wanted.
But she’d been her mother’s daughter for too many years to be able to sink into passion without worrying about consequences. She’d been taught her entire life that all men were evil and only wanted one thing. The very same thing she suddenly realized she desperately wanted herself.
Overwhelmed by it all—by so much heat and desire and need that every last part of her felt swamped by it—she abruptly pulled away.
“Serena?” She was surprised to see that he looked as overwhelmed as she did. “Are you okay?”
She put her hand over her racing heart as if to try to slow it, and to keep from reaching for him again. “Every time you kiss me, I...”
She loved words, but right then she couldn’t find any of the right ones to explain what his kisses did to her. Not when she was only beginning to understand just what a truly powerful force desire could be.
But Sean didn’t seem to need her to finish her sentence. “I know. When you kiss me, it’s like that for me, too.”
If he had reached for her again just then, the truth was that being overwhelmed or confused couldn’t have stopped her from letting him take her into not only another kiss, but more. So much more.
Anything he wanted...because in that moment she would want it, too.
Instead, with what looked like major reluctance on his part, he walked away from her. It took her a few long moments to realize that he was grabbing her Frisbee from the basket.
“Ready to try again?”
She took the red plastic disk from him, working to keep her hand steady. “Sure.” Her voice was still too breathy, her lips still tingling. But now that he’d made an effort to give them some space, she needed to make an effort, too, to keep enough distance between them that she could figure out what she was, and wasn’t, ready for.
She knew how to throw the Frisbee now, remembered precisely how he’d moved her hips and feet and arms a few minutes earlier. Focusing every ounce of her attention on the basket across the field, she drew her arm back and was about to it fly when a bee suddenly buzzed against her nose.
Giving a small scream as she jumped back so that it wouldn’t sting her, she couldn’t quite keep her grip on the Frisbee before it went sliding out of her fingers.
Straight toward Sean.
“Look o—” Her warning dried up in her throat as the Frisbee slammed into the center of his forehead.
She ran over to where he was lying on the ground with his hand over his forehead and got down on her knees beside him. “Oh my God, are you okay?” When he didn’t say anything, just groaned, she tried to explain, “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. There was this bee and I was about to throw the Frisbee and the next thing I knew it was flying in the wrong direction.”
“Nice velocity.”
For a moment, she was sure she must have heard his half-spoken, half-moaned words wrong. He couldn’t have just complimented her on her throwing, could he? Especially not after she’d just felled him.
“It was an accident, I swear. I’m so, so sorry!”
He uncovered his eyes, and she was horrified by the red bump starting to grow on his forehead as he reached up to wind a lock of her hair around his fingers. “I know it was an accident. And I’ve been hit by plenty of harder things on the baseball field and lived to see another day. But none of the guys throwing those things at me were as pretty as you. Or had hair quite this silky.”
Though her heart was still racing from the thought that she’d hurt him, he always knew how to make her smile. “But almost as silky?” she teased. When he laughed, rather than groaning again, she said, “Let me help you up.”
“Probably best if I lie here for a little while longer.”
The next thing she knew, he was tugging her down to lie next to him on the grass...and he didn’t let her hand go the entire time that they lay watching the puffy clouds transform from one shape to another in the slowly darkening sky.
* * *
“So,” Sean said as they were heading away from the field, “when are you free for our next normal date?”
They’d continued playing until the sun had set. At the middle basket, he’d pulled some cheese and crackers and salami and sparkling water out of his bag. They’d sat with their backs against a tree to have a really nice alfresco meal before making their way through the course. Surprisingly, after her terrible beginning she’d actually started to get pretty good at the game. And, not nearly as surprising, she’d really enjoyed spending time with him, especially when he told stories about his brothers and sisters and growing up in the Bay Area. She’d even told him some funny things that had happened during her years of modeling.
Though it was dark now, there were enough lights on campus for her to clearly see the bump on his forehead. It hadn’t gotten much bigger, but it hadn’t gone away, either.
“Are you sure you want to risk potential injury again?”
“One day when we’re old and gray,” he said with a grin, “it will be the perfect first date story.”
How did he do that? By now, she expected him to steal her breath away with his kisses. But he’d just done it with one simple, beautiful sentence.
In that moment, she realized just how easy it could be to do exactly what her mother had warned her about: give up everything for a guy, forget all about why she was really here, forget that she was still on probation and needed to get great grades. She didn’t want to wait one more day to spend time with him again, to laugh and play and kiss. Heck, she didn’t even want to say good night to him in a few minutes when they got back to her dorm...not when it would be the easiest thing in the world to let him take her back to his place so that she could spend the entire night in his arms. A night that she knew wouldn’t stop with just kisses, either.
Which was why she made herself say, “Next Friday.”
It seemed to take him a few moments to realize what she’d said, as if he’d been lost in exactly the same fantasy of tangled limbs and desperate kisses.
“You want to wait a whole week to see each other again?”
God, no, she didn’t want that. But she needed to be smart about this. As smart as she could be, anyway, with the limited number of brain cells and synapses that she could actually get to fire when he was standing this close to her.
“You’re busy with your team and classes and your family.”
“I can figure out how to juggle all those things and you, too, Serena.”
“But I don’t know if I can.” She put her hand on his arm to try to take the sting out of putting on the brakes. “You know how I told you I didn’t get a chance to go to school much as a kid? Well, that meant I didn’t have a normal transcript with the same tests and grades as everybody else. Honestly, I was shocked when I found out Stanford had accepted me on the strength of just a few tests and essays, but the thing is, it’s only a probationary acceptance. Whether or not I get to stay here for the next three and a half years depends on how I do this quarter. I’ve got to nail every single class.”
He slid his hand over hers. “You will.”
“I really hope so. This has been my dream my entire life.”
“I know you love learning,” he said as he reached up to play with a lock of her hair the same way he had on the Frisbee Golf course. “And now that you’ve told me this, I understand that you’ve got even more pressure than the rest of us to excel. But—” He tucked the lock of hair behind her ear, then moved to stroke her lower lip with the pad of his thumb. “—I also know that you’re brilliant enough to succeed at whatever you choose to do. And that this is your way to keep me from moving too fast with you.”
“Sean—”
He pressed his thumb over her lips to quiet her. “And you’re right. Because even knowing you need to go slow, I want to push you fast. So damned fast.” He lowered his gaze to her lips and she shivered with need. “I want to kiss you for hours and hours, nowhere but that sweet mouth of yours, until you’re begging me for more. Pleading with me to kiss you anywhere I want. Everywhere you want.”
Her breathing grew ragged from nothing more than just listening to him.
“So even though I hate having to wait a whole week to see you again, I’m not going to ask you to change your mind. And I won’t text or call or come by or get in your way while you’re studying this week, because something tells me that would be just as bad a distraction for both of us, and I could never forgive myself if your grades slipped because of me. But if you need me for any reason, I want you to know that I’ll drop everything for you.”
His lips were close enough now that she could practically taste them. “What if I just changed my mind?” She knew it was unfair of her to flip-flop like this, but she couldn’t find a way to stop herself from doing it. “What if I told you I don’t want to wait until next Friday night to see you again? What if I said I want to go back to your room with you tonight?” And all the other nights you’ll have me.
“You don’t know how much I want that.” And she could see from the heated desire in his eyes that he meant it. “But I still wouldn’t let you do it, Serena. Because even though I know how good it’s going to be between us, and even though I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you, I also know you’ll end up hating me if we move too fast.”
Her breath rushed out, ragged and shaky. Seeing that they were close to her dorm, it was up to her to make things easier on both of them. “I had a great time tonight, Sean. See you next Friday.”
She made herself walk away, but this time she turned back to smile at him over her shoulder. And when he smiled back she realized she’d never felt happier in her life.