Chapter 26

Taylor

 

Being around the clubhouse without Mayhem has been strange. The days have turned into weeks. He never wrote me back about coming to see him. I guess he’s found what he was looking for. I’ve grown accustomed to the way this place works though. I can see how it’s appealing to some yet revolts others. I, for one, see the appeal. They all care about each other. They all look out for the other. No one is left out. It’s a calming peaceful vibe that comes with the family aspect of it all.

“You holdin’ up?” Blu asks from across the counter. I smile and nod.

“Thanks for letting me work while I’m here,” I tell him. Blu has given me a job at the clubhouse. I cook and clean. It doesn’t bother me, though. He pays me, and I like the guys and girls around here.

“Glad I could help. Can I ask you somethin’?” he says. I look up from where I’m stacking the glasses. I never really looked at Blu that closely. If you didn’t know he was Tic and Mayhem’s dad, you would never guess. He doesn’t look to be much older than the rest of the guys here.

I could have pictured him as another brother. They all share that same deep gaze with those beautiful eyes.

“Of course. Did I do something wrong?” Worry claws at my throat. I don’t want to get kicked out of here for messing up. I have nowhere else to go.

“No. Why would you think that?” he questions. I just shrug. Maybe because I’ve always been told I’ve done something wrong.

“I know your daddy wasn’t the best father figure in the world. In fact, I know a lot more about the man than you probably do. You know why Mayhem was on your security right?”

God, just hearing his name makes my knees weak. It makes me miss having him around and annoying me. I shrug. I mean, I know someone was after my dad.

“I just know what my dad told me. That he had some people that weren’t happy with him.”

Blu nods before he cracks his neck from side to side. “Russians. He has Russians after him, which are the worst enemies to make. After I learned of that, I cut ties with him,” he says.

“When was that?” I ask slightly interested now.

“Few weeks after Mayhem had been watchin’ you.” A few weeks? Mayhem was around for longer than a few weeks!

“Wait. Then why was Mayhem still there?” I ask more to myself.

Blu just chuckles and says, “Isn’t it obvious?”

Not to me, it isn’t! If he didn’t need to watch me, why was he there? Why did he care enough to have Monster watch me after that?

“The wheels are spinnin’.” Blu laughs harder.

I look over at him confused. Until a light goes off in my head. “He looked at me like I was her.” Now it all makes sense.

“No. He looked at you as Taylor. The girl who sucked him in. The girl who was slowly rippin’ down his wall of defense, and he didn’t know how to handle it.”

I shake my head not wanting to believe a word of what he’s saying. There is no way.

“You can say no, darlin’, but I know my son. He’s hurtin’. Losin’ Becca took a lot out of him. He lost a piece of himself that he can’t get back. There’s a void in him, but it isn’t her that’s missin’. You get what I’m sayin’?” When he stops and looks at me, I nod my head slowly.

“He asked me to go see him,” I say softly.

“He did? Are you goin’?” Blu asks seeming a little more excited than I was.

“No. That was when he first left.”

“Fuck that. Get your shit together. You’re takin’ a little road trip. He needs to see what’s right in front of him,” Blu says, slamming the beer bottle in his hand down on the counter.

My heart leaps in my chest at the thought of seeing him again, but there’s a piece of me that doesn’t want to. He didn’t call or write for me to come.

“I don’t know.” I try to protest, but the look in Blu’s eyes tells me I better not. He does know his son better than I do.

“Pack a small bag. I’ll get Monster to drive you down. The girls will take care of Minnie while you’re gone.” He walks away quickly not leaving me any room to say no.

I don’t know how this is going to work out. What if he doesn’t want to see me? What if he changed his mind?

Being pushed away by my own father was one thing, but being rejected by Mayhem is another. I saw the hurt in his eyes that night at the club. I felt the vulnerability in him when he cut himself at my house. I don’t want to hurt the man any more than he already is.

I don’t want to be hurt, either.

Reality is a hard pill to swallow. It hurts to know that he could reject me. What if I show up there and he doesn’t want to see me? What if he’s found someone else?

“You ready?” Monster yells with a smile on his face. Oh God, this is going to be bad.