“She didn’t just catch me on fire, she stayed around to burn with me.”
Hayley Stumbo~
The scattered pictures of Melissa’s family hung on her wall, writing me a perfect page of her life. She’d told me a little more about her family when we’d eaten dinner. She offered me small glimpses into her past. She’d told me, that even though she’d been the troublemaker, Maria hadn’t always been the responsible one either. I found myself comparing her sister to Liam, and wishing I would’ve known Melissa back then. I scanned the photographs of her father and mother as they watched their daughters grow in each snapshot. An ache formed like a knot in my chest as I realized the pictures of Melissa stopped after she’d become a teen. No prom pictures, no high school memories. Just Maria and Jordan. I couldn’t help the questions that formed on my tongue, but she’d asked for time, and I’d promised that her past wasn’t relevant, so I swallowed down my curiosity.
I smiled as I noticed a picture with a much skinnier version of Melissa. She wasn’t a teen, maybe mid-twenties, but she was sitting in a bumper car with what looked like a six or seven-year-old Jordan.
“That picture is terrible.” Melissa’s gentle hand linked with mine and the heat of her body surrounded me.
“You look so different,” I noted. She didn’t agree or disagree.
When I turned to gauge her expression, her eyes were focused on the wall ahead. Her face indifferent.
I squeezed her hand and asked, “How old is Jordan in that picture?”
“Six,” she answered immediately but kept her eyes forward.
“He looks just like you.” I chuckled and turned toward the kitchen. “Need my help cleaning up?” I asked after a moment.
“I got it all, but thanks.” She released my hand, and I met her blank stare.
“I should’ve helped clean up.”
“I pushed you out for a reason.” Her smile returned allowing the spark I loved to light her eyes. The ache in my chest unfurled. “Not enough room in there, you’re a giant.”
“I’m not that big, you’re just a hobbit.”
She huffed out a laugh. “A hobbit?”
I nodded. “Yup, a sexy hobbit who makes awesome soup.”
“I thought you said it was terrible?” She raised her brow.
“It was pretty bad, but I’d eat it again.” I was kidding and she knew it. The giggle that parted her plump lips had the truth spilling from my own. “Best soup I’ve ever had.”
Melissa’s eyes brimmed with… was it pride? My grin stretched as she leaned into me. It wasn’t something I was expecting to feel, and maybe it was some deep-rooted, caveman crap, but I really liked having her serve me—feed me. She was a damn good cook, and I could see myself sitting across from her, eating dinner with her every night.
“It’s getting late,” she whispered and I draped my arm around her waist.
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to stay. I did. But I felt the shift in the air between us, the cool burst of dismissal. “I should let you get to sleep.”
I dropped my arm and turned toward the table where I’d left my jacket. I didn’t look at her, fearing what I would see in her dark eyes when I asked, “When can I see you again?”
I reached the table, but before I could even lift my jacket from the back of the kitchen chair, I felt her hot hands on the curve of my shoulders.
“I want you to stay,” her whispered words trembled.
Her hands skimmed along my ribcage and rested on my waist once I turned to face her.
Melissa’s brown eyes were hooded, and I couldn’t resist lifting my hand to her face. My thumb trailed across the scorching skin of her cheek, her lips.
“Are you sure?” I asked hoping for a yes.
“The weather…”
My smile crept slowly across my lips. I wasn’t sure if it made me a bad person, but I thought it was cute that she was this nervous about asking me to stay.
“I have four-wheel drive. I’ll be fine.” My playful intentions were obvious.
The humor in my voice put a sassy-as-fuck scowl on her lips as she shoved my chest—hard. I barked out a laugh as I pulled her against me.
“Do you want me to stay because of the weather, or because...”
“I don’t want you to leave,” she said. “I… I’ve never really had anyone over here before… well, besides family.”
“It’ll be a first for both of us tonight.” The husky sound of my voice betrayed my confidence. The rapid beat of my pulse dotted every word.
My hands rested on either side of her neck, my fingers sliding into her hair as I tipped her head back. Melissa was the perfect mixture of want and fear. The definition of desire was the curve of her mouth, the flush of her cheeks and the gold flecks in her eyes. When our mouths finally joined together it was the yes I’d needed. The invitation I’d craved.
She was training me, pacing me, and I’d let her hold all the ropes, as long as I could have her… all of her.
Her hands found their way under my shirt, her nails dragging along the ridges of my abdomen. A quiet hum of appreciation kick started my heart as she lowered her thumbs just below the waistline of my jeans. My shaky hands cradled her head until our slow kiss evolved into fisted hair and biting teeth. I only parted from her mouth to taste the line of her jaw, lick the beat of her pulse just below her ear, and when she shivered I smiled along the bow of her throat.
She curled her hand into the front of my shirt and I ran mine down the length of her body as she draped her other arm around my neck. Melissa stood on her tiptoes as I captured her lips again, but it wasn’t enough, I needed her closer. I gripped the backs of her thighs and lifted her body in one, fluid, swift motion. Her legs closed around my hips, and I walked her to the bed.
We were falling, lips together, hearts aligned, and when her back hit the mattress, the weight of my body, my need, it held her still beneath me. She pulled at my shirt, and I lifted it over my head with one arm, keeping the other wrapped around her. I brought my mouth back to hers as I raised her sweater. I kissed her belly, her hip, and my fingers folded around the waistband of her pants.
They slid off her legs, revealing everything to me, and after I tossed them to the ground, I pressed my lips to her inner thigh. She whispered my name, and it was the first word uttered over the past five minutes. It filled the quiet space of her apartment, and I liked the sound of it, as if my name belonged to these walls. From between her legs, I watched the way her mouth opened as I tasted her. The feminine scent, it was all Melissa, and it flooded my tongue as I savored and licked. She lifted her hips, fighting my rhythm, fighting against the torture of my slow feast, and when her hands ripped at my hair, I slid two fingers inside her.
I won deep, breathless whimpers, her pleasure was a drug, and I could listen to her pant all night long.
“Kieran,” she begged. “Come here.”
She tugged at my hair, and I couldn’t help but chuckle as I kissed a path up her body. I pushed her sweater over her breasts and was more than happy to see she didn’t have on a bra. I brought the dark peak of her right nipple into my mouth as she pulled her sweater over her head and threw it.
She raised onto her elbows, and I took a moment to admire her. The light from the lamp created deep shadows across her tan skin. Goose bumps lined the teardrop shape of her breast as I drew circles around the tight nipple with my tongue. Every inch of her skin was flawless, and if I hadn’t already seen it, I wouldn’t have even noticed her surgical scar.
The tips of my fingers traced the barely raised skin and her eyes closed.
“I like this.”
“It’s a scar,” she said as she tipped her head back.
“I’m nervous enough as it is, just looking at you…. you’re everything I imagined… everything…” Melissa’s eyes popped open. “We all have something that makes us who we are. It’s ours and ours alone. This scar... it makes you human.” She sat up and I leaned back onto my jean-clad calves. Her eyes glistened and I worried if what I said had upset her.
“What makes you human?” she asked. Her whisper felt small and fragile as her big brown eyes appraised me.
“You.” I cupped her cheek and she smiled. “You make me feel like a man.”
She swallowed, and the glitter I’d seen in her eyes had disappeared “You make me remember how it feels to be worth something.”
She was worth so much more than she gave herself credit for. I’d only known her a short while and I could already see how fucking amazing she was. “With me… you’ll always know, Mel, always. You’re worth so much more than you know.”
She shifted onto her knees without a word. The silhouette of her body was lined by the buttery lamp light. The thick, dark waves of her hair fell over her shoulder, and as I trailed the pads of my thumbs over the silk skin of her hips, she lowered her lips to the corner of my mouth. Her kiss was tender at first, but as her tongue parted my lips, the kiss became a run-on sentence. Long strokes and no time for a breath.
She situated her body just to the side of where I was kneeling and my grip fell from her hips.
Her gaze held mine and her steady hands unbuckled my belt as she said, “Lie down.” It wasn’t a command, it was an offer.
I took it.
My back hit the mattress as I lifted my hips enough to pull off my jeans and boxer briefs. Melissa shoved them onto the floor and straddled my thighs. Holy shit. My throat closed as our eyes devoured each other’s naked forms. She was an hourglass, and my pulse was a deep bass beat. Her hand gripped the length of my dick and a shuddered breath exhaled from my lungs. I grit my teeth as she worked her grip in a lazy rhythm, pumping her small hand up and down.
There wasn’t much in the world I would die for. My brothers, and maybe even my God, but the way Melissa’s thumb swept the head of my dick, the way she was teasing me with easy strokes… I’d die to feel relief, to be inside her, to fill her up, watch her fall apart above me.
She leaned across my body and released her hold. The tip of my dick brushed against her, and I almost lost it right then and there. I closed my eyes when her lips touched mine, the sweet taste of her mouth calmed the stirring waters inside me, the wild rapids only she was capable of conjuring. She kissed my cheek, my jaw, and whispered into my ear, “Do you have a condom?”
No. No, I did not.
I exhaled a sharp breath.
“I don’t.” I hoped she couldn’t hear the stuttered desperation in my voice.
She sat up, and just the sight of her—her caramel skin—it was all on display, and I felt like a kid denied his one wish on Christmas.
She ran her hand through my hair and giggled. “You look so sad right now.”
“I wouldn’t say sad.” I gave her my best lopsided grin even though inside I was slowly dying.
“Hear me out.” She bit the side of her lip and I nodded. “I’m on the pill. And I’ve been tested. So, technically…”
“We don’t need a condom.” Anxiety trickled into each beat of my heart as she nodded and lowered her mouth to mine again.
Every performance fear a man could have ran through my head. All my inexperience rattled inside my ribcage with each irregular beat of my heart. But the way she felt, her skin, her hands in my hair, our bodies pressed together, it felt right, natural, and the panic faded into the feel of her lips on mine. Our kiss became urgent as my hands moved down her waist, past her hips, and between her thighs. She moaned and broke away, lifting the heat of her body from my chest.
Melissa took my hands, guided them back to her waist as she hovered just above me, and when her fingers gripped my length, a low growl vibrated inside my chest. Her eyes were locked on mine, her touch held me prisoner, and as she positioned her body, she allowed the tip of my dick to slide slightly inside her. My eyes tried to close, but I wouldn’t allow it. I wouldn’t let myself miss this. I wouldn’t succumb to the loud rush of blood in my veins. The rise and fall of her chest was heavy as she lowered herself, as I slid into the slick warmth of her.
The world as I knew it had come to an end.
She didn’t move, and neither did our eyes. She was watching me, and I was falling. Falling for the pink of her cheeks that dripped down onto her chest. Falling for the wet heat of her body and how it grounded me. Falling for the way her mouth was open, her perfect lips unable to hold back her soft moan as I filled her completely. Every breath I took connected her to me. We were one in the same, and when she finally rocked her hips, my fingers dug into her flesh.
“Melissa.” Her name strained past my lips. I was in agony and I never wanted to be cured.
The palms of her hands rested on my chest as she moved once, and then again. The muscles in my stomach burned as her mouth crashed into mine. She kept moving, but I couldn’t find the words to tell her to stop. My teeth nipped at her chin. My hands failed to guide her pace. She was too tight, felt so good, and I sensed that build at the base my spine as I growled for her to stop.
“Fuck.” I groaned and sat up bringing us chest to chest.
She adjusted her legs to the new position and we both took a minute to breathe.
Her body consumed me fully as her heels dug into the flesh of my lower back. Buried inside her, my eyes fell to where our bodies were connected, and I sucked in a strangled breath when she rolled her hips.
“You’re trying to end this before we even get started?” I asked and her overly pleased smile made me laugh.
Her fingers tickled the nape of my neck before they traveled to my shoulders. “Touch me.” Her whisper was warm against my mouth and the heat of it fed the building ache, the impatience of release begging for attention.
She fell back onto the palms of her hands, the angle pulling me in even deeper.
I stopped breathing entirely.
If I moved one muscle I was done. After I silently counted to five, I was able to take three even breaths, but it did nothing to ease my furious pulse. I wasn’t ready for the end. I couldn’t let go.
I kept a firm grip on her hips as I moved both of our bodies at once. She fell onto her back and when our connection broke I stifled another groan.
She was splayed out before me with a soft smile. I massaged the muscles of her inner thighs as I pulled them apart. My teeth pinched the skin of her thigh as I moved up her leg with my lips. Our scents had blended together, and I took my time memorizing the new taste, sucking on that sensitive bundle of nerves that would eventually have her crying out my name if I allowed it.
My lips touched her, tasted her, kissed her thighs, her stomach—her mouth. Each part of her was a prayer offering me release. Touching Melissa was like praying the rosary. She was the new prayer I would learn and memorize and worship. Being with her like this had the same effect on my heart, on my soul, as when I’d knelt each night with those familiar beads between my fingers. She held a power over my heart, the ability to break it, own it, and as my lips whispered her name against the skin of her temple, I pushed inside her.
There was no shame in her eyes. No guilt in my heart. We were meant to be linked like this. I pressed deeply, digging for more as our mouths bruised and bit. Each one of her breaths belonged to me as our bodies let go of control. My hands framed her face, and I held her stare as I moved above her. The muscle in my jaw tensed as my shoulders went rigid. Melissa’s nails raked across my back, and I growled into her mouth. Her fingers pressed into the muscles of my hip eliciting another low growl as her legs wound tightly around me. Sweat beaded on my forehead and along my back. I wanted her to have it all, give her everything she was giving me as I slipped my hand between us and touched her.
“Oh, God,” she gasped as her body clenched, and shuddered, and drew my climax to its end.
I swore when the flash of heat lit my spine. The rope that I’d barely been holding snapped and I became pure fucking feeling.
There were no syllables.
No words.
There was no heaven… no hell.
There was only her.
Just… her.