Lord Gilchrist stood in stunned silence. He was sure that was the very first time he received that reaction when meeting a lady for the first time. Lady Abigail, however, burst out in tears, this time from laughter.
It took a good minute before Lady Abigail regained her composure, so comical was the sight that had transpired before her. Finally, when she did, she made the proper but probably not necessary introductions between her mother and Lord Gilchrist.
“I am so grateful to you, Lord Gilchrist,” the dowager duchess said with every fiber of her heart.
“It was an honor, Your Grace,” Gilchrist said with another embarrassed bow. He still hadn’t quite overcome their first sudden meeting and was pink in the ear.
He shuffled his way over to take a seat at the breakfast table after the dowager duchess encouraged him to do so. He couldn’t bear to raise his eyes to meet Lady Abigail.
Normally he would have jabbed her good for laughing at his expense. However he had heard the words the dowager duchess spoke before they were drawing to his entrance. It reminded him of the promise he made to the duke to offer Lady Abigail marriage.
It had seemed like a logical idea at the time, but that also seemed a million years ago and not just a few days and a couple hundred miles away. It would have been a reasonable idea for Lady Abigail to save herself from the embarrassment of an elopement gone wrong.
At the same time, it would have given him a wife to produce an heir to the Gilchrist name. This was something he was sure he would never have gotten otherwise, even in the wilds of the new Americas.
The logical agreement had been all business. However, Gilchrist couldn’t deny the feelings he had for Lady Abigail that made the whole thing far less of a contract of convenience for him.
Lord Gilchrist, however, knew the longer he waited to bring up the matter the harder it would be. Soon the duke would arrive at his home and ask his sister what her answer had been to Gilchrist. What would happen when he learned no question had been asked?
“Lady Abigail,” he finally said midway through his morning meal. “I was wondering if perhaps this afternoon you might take me around the grounds a bit. I wouldn’t mind seeing some of it before I am on my way, if you don’t mind?”
Both ladies’ red brows were peaked at this question. He couldn’t help but notice how much Lady Abigail was a younger version of her mother. Yes, the dowager duchess had more years worn on her face, and the vibrant red of her hair was dulled with sliver, but she still was a very fine looking woman.
His heart beating fast at the thought that it could quite possibly be the face of Lady Abigail he would see, should she accept his proposal.
“Of course I would be happy to,” Lady Abigail responded.
“You are welcome to stay as long as you would like, Lord Gilchrist,” the dowager duchess chimed in. “I am sure my son won’t be far behind your own arrival. You must promise to stay till they both are here at least?”
Lord Gilchrist thought that all rather depended on the answer that Lady Abigail would give him this afternoon. That was if he had the courage actually to ask. None the less, he promised to do so for the sake of the dowager duchess.
For the first few minutes, Lady Abigail took Lord Gilchrist around the gardens just behind the Manor house. She could tell there was something weighing intensely on his mind.
“When your brother came to see me,” Gilchrist finally said, “and told me about what happened, I told him I would be happy to take his place in searching you out.”
Gilchrist seemed to fidget with his hands as a nervous habit. Lady Abigail wasn’t sure if she had ever seen him nervous like this before.
“You see we weren’t sure if you had truly gone willingly with Heshing, although your brother suspected otherwise. I promised that no matter the reason for your departure, I would make sure you were seen safe and securely settled.”
“And so you have,” Lady Abigail said still unsure where he was going with this speech.
She looked up at him squinting against the rare rays of sunshine they got so far up north. As always, he had made sure to keep her on his right side, though she was sure he knew that she was not bothered by his deformity. In this light, however, looking on his perfect side, she imagined it was what a Greek god from the old mythology might have looked like.
“Your bother was very concerned about the repercussions of retaking you from the unwanted elopement.”
“For my nieces,” Lady Abigail said filled with a massive guilt.
“Not just them, but yourself as well. I also couldn’t help but overhear your mother’s last few words before I came into the breakfast room this morning.”
It seemed to be a much more embarrassing way about asking a woman to marry him, but Gilchrist couldn’t seem to manage any other way. The charming man he once was, had long since died in the fire. The man that was left was ultimately not up to the task of enticing a woman to marry him.
“I am not quite sure what you are trying to say,” Lady Abigail said shielding a gloved hand against her face as she looked up at Lord Gilchrist.
She had been happy to free herself of parasols and hats now back at her own home and away from the judgmental eyes of the ton. At this moment, while she had to look up to see Gilchrist’s meaning on his face, she rather wished she had suffered one.
“What I am trying to say,” Gilchrist gave a deep breath before stopping and turning to face the lady head on. “I suggested to the duke that a marriage contract be procured between the two of us,” he said in a quick succession of words.
Once it was out, he gave a deep sigh. He had done his part. If the lady refused him, he would inevitably break into a million pieces, so much did he care for her. But that being said, he would also respect her wishes to live a life of her choosing. He would not force himself upon the lady.
Lady Abigail seemed to look up at him for some moments. In that time Gilchrist studied the curves of her face, the delicate speckles along her nose, and even the soft strands of hair that let loose and blew in the wind.
He would accept her answer whatever it might be. However, he would not stay long if she had not wished to attach herself to him. It would be too much. In his mind, he prepared for this to be the very last time that he looked on the face of Lady Abigail Grant.
“Are you asking me to marry you?” Lady Abigail finally formed the words.
“Yes,” he said with an embarrassed laugh before rubbing the unscarred side of his chin with a soft laugh, “that is what I meant.”
“But why? Why on earth would you want to do that? There is of no benefit to you? I could never do such a thing to save my own dignity. I would never ask such a thing of you?”
“I know, I’m asking you,” Gilchrist said with a little tease not precisely happy with the answer he got.
“But you would be stuck with me. I thought you rather didn’t like me much?” She said looking back at him.
“I agree we have had our differences, but I find you a good friend. I can share with you things I have never put into words for another. I would give you my name for protection; my home would be your own. You would not be so far from your family. I know that you also find my sister and mother good company. It wouldn’t be so terrible for you,” he seemed to try to convince her of the benefit of this union.
“I am well aware why accepting your marriage would be a good and logical choice for myself. You have done so much for me. However, I don’t know that I could ever wish to lock you in such a situation.”
“Why ever not?” Gilchrist said trying to hold in his laugh. This woman honestly had no idea how much he wished that she would not only marry him but perhaps even find a way to care for him over the years.
“Well don’t you want to, you know, find a match of your own choosing.”
“I can’t imagine many who will be lining up to be the Countess of Gilchrist. My mother quite hates me for that fact I am sure.”
“You mean for lack of an heir,” Lady Abigail said with a deep swallow.
Gilchrist imagines it was the first that the realization of the results of their marriage came to her mind. He was sure at that moment she could not stomach the idea of having his child. He would not require such of her if she didn’t wish it.
“That is her reasoning yes. I would be happy just to appease her with a wife. It would also be nice to have a companion in life, if that was something you also wished for,” Gilchrist added tentatively.
She turned from him at this point and walked forward a few paces as she thought the matter over. For all reason, this was a very good choice for her, and in reality, the only one. Could she find herself living with Gilchrist’s unpredictable nature though? They were on good terms now, but that seemed to shift and change so much between them.
Her greatest fear was that though he was now doing what he thought was gentlemanly and right, he would later come to resent her for it. She wasn’t entirely sure if she would be willing to marry a man solely for her own benefit.
“If I said yes,” Lady Abigail said and then paused to see if Gilchrist would follow. He gave a soft smile and began again to meet her step for step.
“If I said yes,” she repeated, “You must promise to never hate me.”
Gilchrist stopped her again and turned her to face him. He looked down at her with all the love and affection of his heart. This woman would give her life to the beast before her to save her family’s reputation and good name, and all her concern was that he didn’t resent her later for it.
He reached up and gently cupped both her elbows gently drawing her just a step closer to him. He looked down at her, he would have liked to kiss her, but knew she wouldn't want it.
“I promise that no matter what, I will never hate you.”