Chapter Twenty-Six
Abby
I covered the head of his penis with my mouth and sucked. He felt hot and smooth against my tongue. His head fell back on the bed, and he let out a ragged breath. Positive feedback, I guessed. I had never done this with anyone before. I had never really wanted to. It felt like something really personal to do with someone. I wanted to please him; I wanted to own his pleasure.
I wrapped my hand around the root and sucked again, trying to get a little more of his length into my mouth. It wasn’t easy; he was big and thick. He tasted like musk and salt. I felt his hand get lost in my hair, fisting a handful. I concentrated on the tip again, using my tongue to lick around it and over the eye. He groaned, and I felt a soft tug at my hair. I jerked my hand up and down and sucked, hollowing my cheeks out.
“Stop,” he said hoarsely. I sat up, worried I’d done something wrong. He pulled me up so I was back on his lap and sat up to kiss me deeply. His hands went around my back to snap my bra open. He squeezed my breasts roughly, feeling them in his hands. I shuddered when he pinched my nipples. I had missed this.
I broke the kiss and pushed him back down on his back.
“Stay down,” I told him. “I want to make you come.” His eyes were dark with lust, and he looked like he was about to come after me. I could see how tight and tense his muscles were from the strain of not getting what he wanted immediately.
I slid off the bed, taking my panties off and pulling at his jeans and underwear so we were both naked. I was wet just looking at him. I hadn’t forgotten what he felt like inside me, but imagining it alone was nothing compared to having him again. I felt starved, like an animal. I ached to feel him touching the deepest part of me.
I quickly went to my closet to get a condom before I climbed back onto the bed and straddled him again. His penis was so hard it lay along his stomach. I watched his face as I ripped the wrapper and slowly sheathed his dick in the rubber.
The muscle in his jaw was working, and he was throbbing in my hands. I inched forward, raising off of him and positioning his tip right at my opening. I felt powerful and extremely horny, and I wanted this to last as long as it could. I ran his thick head over my entrance and clit, making it slick and wet. I closed my eyes and moaned. He thrust his hips upward, trying to slide inside.
“Not so fast,” I teased, smirking.
“Please, Abby,” he whispered harshly. I slid down onto him slowly. His head fell back, and he cursed, fisting the covers. I felt myself stretching to accommodate his size. He fit so tight. I leaned forward against him and ground my hips. My hands went to his chest, leaning into him so I could ride him.
I wanted to take my time, but that wasn’t going to happen. He pinched my nipples, making me scream. He thrust upwards powerfully to meet my every move. I could feel my orgasm building, burning like a fire at my core.
I leaned back, balancing my weight on his thighs so I could bounce up and down on his cock. I moaned, feeling him fill me even deeper. I was so close, but I didn’t want to come before he did. I sped up my movements, hearing his breathing become erratic and quick. His hands dug into my thighs.
“Fuck, Abby. I’m going to come,” he said. I rode him wildly, fucking myself on his cock. He groaned, shuddering below me as he came.
The sounds of his pleasure made me hotter than I had known I could get. I felt his thumb roughly rub my engorged clit, and I was finished. I exploded around him, collapsing forward with a scream. My body spasmed with erotic aftershocks as the wave passed over me.
I panted, trying to catch my breath as I lay on his chest. He was still inside me. His hand lazily rubbed my back. This felt right, laying in his embrace after giving ourselves to each other. Everything was here and now and powerful, and we could be present without thinking about anything else. When we were like this, I could pretend this could last. I kissed his chest gently before shifting my weight off of him.
"Where are you going?" he asked.
"I'll be right back. I just want to clean up," I told him. He let me go. I walked quickly to the bathroom and rinsed off under the shower, careful not to get my hair wet. I wrapped myself up in a towel, then took it off. I didn't want to hide from him. After that? I couldn't.
I had only had a handful of sexual experiences, absolutely due to the fact that I had never really acted on any interest in the past before. I didn't feel like an inexperienced half-virgin when I was with Nate. I felt alive and powerful enough to ride him and take my pleasure from him as much as I gave to him.
I liked feeling wanted and sexy. That was how he made me feel. I walked back outside and quickly grabbed a long t-shirt from my closet before climbing back onto the bed where Nate had waited.
He was back in his underwear, lying on his back. He smiled at me as I settled next to him.
"Was that your plan this whole night?" he asked.
"What if it was?"
"Then I didn't know you as well as I thought, Abby," he said with a smirk. "I thought you were innocent."
"Oh, no. Far from it," I laughed, rolling my eyes.
"Maybe I should leave more often if that's how you welcome me back," he joked. "Again. What I said that night... I would give anything to take it back," he said seriously.
I sat up, crossing my legs and looking down at him. "Why did you tell me to leave that night?" I asked.
He sat up against my bed's headboard and pulled me into him so I was leaning on his chest. His big, warm hand rested on my hip, playing with the fabric of the t-shirt.
"I didn't want to. I had been planning this amazing night for the two of us. When we were at dinner, I kept getting those phone calls."
"I remember," I said.
"When I went outside to talk, I told you it was someone from LA. That wasn't the whole truth. It was Kirsten…my ex-wife.” He paused like he wanted to give me time to digest that. I gently stroked his chest, feeling his fine chest hair under my fingers.
“We were married for three years before getting divorced earlier this year." He paused again, taking a deep breath. I felt his chest rise and fall under my face.
I knew that he had had a wife. The relationship hadn't been that public; no wedding special on E! or anything like that, but it wasn't a secret that Nate Stone had been married. My focus had been more on his music than his personal life, but some details I had been aware of. I kept quiet, though, so he would keep talking.
"She and I... We have a pretty bad relationship. There's no nice way to put it. She was one of the people I was running from when I came here. She hadn't contacted me in a while, but the last time that she had, she had been laying into me, telling me I wasn't worth shit and that the band was better off without me.
“This time on the phone, she was all nice, saying she wanted us to get back together when I went back to LA." I stiffened, lifting my head to look up at him.
"Are you still seeing each other?" I asked.
"No. We haven't lived under the same roof for months," he said. "I don't want to get back together with her. I told her to fuck off, that I was on a date. She wasn't happy about that," he said, scoffing darkly.
"What did she say?"
"She called me a bastard for leading you on because I'm leaving the island at the end of the summer," he said. I lay my head back on his chest so I wasn't looking at him anymore.
There it was. The truth that was somehow a little worse than him simply not wanting me anymore because he was done with me.
"You aren't leading me on. I know you have to leave," I said.
"That doesn't make it better. I really care about you, Abby. I know I've hurt you already, but I didn't want you to believe I could give you something that I couldn't. I still don't," he said. I sighed, touching his chest.
"But you came back," I said.
"I couldn't stay away knowing I still had you close enough to touch," he said quietly.
"Then that's all that matters," I whispered. I closed my eyes concentrating on the feel of him under my hands and warming my body. He was here. Here and now, this moment was what mattered.
I didn't want to keep having this conversation because I already knew he wasn't mine to keep. I didn't need to spend the precious moments that we did have basically planning to lose him. I wasn't going to do that. I was going to be present in these moments because they were what I'd have to hang onto even when he had left. They were mine. I had them even if I wouldn’t always have him.