EFFA
“It doesn’t matter, you’re not like them—”
He scoffs. “Like them… so you mean the crew?”
Feeling more than a little annoyed at myself for even saying anything, I tense up. “Mercs you’re not getting it. With them… there was no feelings involved. It was only an outlet.”
His muscles relax, but he exhales, rolling onto his back next to me on the bed. “I think maybe we should cool it for tonight.”
Throwing my head back into the pillow, I clench my eyes shut and sigh. “Sorry. Fuck!”
“For what?”
“For being who I am.”
He grabs my hand, making me open my eyes to look at him. He’s frowning. “Don’t ever say that again. Don’t ever apologize for being who you are. I like who you are. I just have to wrap my head around who you’ve been. I know the Effa who enjoyed a good time, is not the Effa who’s lying next to me right now. That’s not the Effa I’m going to be with…” Mercs pauses turning on his side, and I do the same. He leans in, gently pressing his lips to mine, his arm reaches around and holds me tightly to him as he deepens the kiss and then pulls back looking in my eyes. “Just give me some time.”
Nodding, I move to sit up on the bed. “I guess you’re going back to your room?”
“No. I’m not leaving on that note, and I’m not going anywhere. I much prefer being with you than my cold empty bed. You mean a lot to me, Effa.”
“You mean a lot to me, too, Mercs. But if you’re going to stay, you need to take your pants off, because you’re still far too dressed,” I plead and he chuckles.
I’m tired from a restless sleep, but I must have managed to fall into a deep enough sleep for the last few hours as I wake feeling almost refreshed. I hate not sleeping well. I wish I had a way of making my sleep patterns more manageable, but since I’ve had Mercs in my bed, it seems to be settling down, and I’ve been sleeping a little longer and more comfortably. Whether it’s from the solace of knowing someone’s with me, I’m not sure, but it’s nice having his company.
Rolling over, I move my hand out to reach for him, but the bedsheets are cold, and his body most certainly isn’t within reach. Opening my eyes, I blink a few times to see daylight trying to break through the thick curtains, and my bed is completely empty.
Swallowing hard, I turn toward where the ensuite is located, but the light isn’t on. I look down to the floor to where Mercs’ pants, shirt, and shoes were the night before, and they’re not there anymore. A shudder runs over my now cold body, and I sit up on the bed, the covers falling away from my skin to reveal my naked breasts as I look around the room.
Nothing.
There’s no sign of him.
Chewing on my bottom lip, I scoot over to the edge of the bed and slide my legs out. My feet hit the plush carpet, the smooth texture doing nothing for my nerves, as I stand up and walk to the ensuite to double check. Each step I take, my heart pummels in my chest a little harder, thinking that maybe he’s done what I fear—he’s left during the night. My past being right on his doorstep is possibly too much for him to handle.
Peering around the entry of the ensuite, silently praying to Gaia that he’s in there dressed and about to go and grab us some coffees or something instead of the alternative, my pulse quickens, and I clench my jaw as I look inside.
Empty.
He’s gone.
My throat constricts as my chest tightens in the knowledge that he was too chicken shit to tell me to my face that he was going to leave. I don’t know if he’s simply left my room, left the tour… fuck! He could have left the country for all I know. The one thing I do know is there’s anger burning inside of me that I haven’t felt for a long time and I don’t like how it’s making me feel. I don’t do anger, I’m all about embracing the love and harmony. So why do I feel this way?
I’m hurt.
Sure, Mercs and I hadn’t fallen into anything. Hell, I’ve only known him a few days at best, but still, I thought I was worth more than a silent escape during the middle of the fucking night.
Turning up my chin, I sniff and swing back around, storming into my suite with my head held high. “Well, fuck him,” I say. I won’t let him ruin this tour. And if he has left and Luke gets all up in my grill, I will let him, because he was right and I shouldn’t have been messing around with Mercs in the first place. Now, he’s probably gone and it’s my fault, but I will own it and take the fallout.
Taking a deep breath, I walk up to my suitcase to grab my shampoo and conditioner to wash my hair. I’m not going to bother dressing up today, we’re only getting on our private jet to fly out to Montana for our show at Rimrock Auto Arena tomorrow night. Today we fly in, get all set up, and then tomorrow we’re ready for another concert. Touring is hard work.
Grabbing my toiletries, I head back to the ensuite and walk to the large shower alcove. The thing about the top level suites is their rooms are always the nicest ones, and the showers are huge. I place my toiletries in the cutout and lean in, turning on the water.
Stepping back out, I pull off my G-string and throw it on the floor. As I step in, the water instantly caresses my body, still tainted with the leftovers of last night’s show. I sweat a lot during a concert, and even though last night was a calmer more sedate performance, I still need this shower. Actually, I needed it last night, but I got quite worked up with Mercs in my bed, so I’m going to wash the memory of him away.
My face slides under the burning hot liquid, and I relish in the frenzied attack of the water. It rains down on my face taking the remnants of the night before with it, and calmness soothes my tense body. My hair flattens as the steady lines of water run through it, reminding me that Mercs likes to clench his fist in my hair when we kiss. Clamping my eyes tighter, I scrub at my face trying to rid him from my mind as I turn, letting the water run through my hair in an attempt to rid the sensation of him from there too.
Opening my eyes, I grab the shampoo and go about my routine. I need to get underway if I’m to make the jet on time, so I have to stop dwelling and get the fuck on with it.
What will be, will be.
Everything happens for a reason.
Believe that, Effa.
Making quick work of my shower, my muscles relaxing more and more with the fragrances of my fruity shampoos and body wash, and soon I’m feeling more like myself. I take a deep centering breath in and out and turn off the water with a smile plastered on my face.
It’s fake.
I know it is.
But I believe that if you smile for long enough, your body will believe it, and in turn, you will naturally start to feel happier. So I plaster on my fakest smile and step out of the shower squeezing my hair out and then reach for a towel. Wrapping my hair up first, I then grab another and start to dry myself down, the fluffiness of the towel feels like heaven against my skin as I smile into the mirror, but even I can tell the reflection looking back at me seems overly fake.
I let out a small huff and throw my towel on the floor, walking naked into the suite and over to my suitcase. I grab some panties, throw them on followed by a matching pink bra when a knock sounds at my door. I’m hopeful that it might be Mercs. So I race toward the door, not caring that I’m in my underwear with a towel wrapped around my head. Desperately anxious, I swing the door open hoping to see Mercs on the other side with those coffees, praying that this has all been a terrible misunderstanding on my behalf.
Smiling wide, the door seems heavier than normal as I struggle to open it, but I yank it back and almost burst through to get to him. “I knew you wouldn’t leave like tha—”
Shit!
My eyes bug out of my head when I see Jett standing there, his eyes wide, taking in my practically naked frame with a sideways grin.
“Oh… so not who I was expecting,” I sigh, my voice so low you can hear the disappointment seeping through my tone.
He swallows a hard lump in his throat, and his eyes slowly make their way up to meet mine. “Umm… have I caught you at a bad time?”
I shrug, letting out an exacerbated sigh. “No. Just… it doesn’t even matter.”
Jett grimaces. “Are you okay? You look… I mean, you look amazing, but you look… kinda sad?” His eyes running up and down my barely covered body again, as I look down to see my perky breasts wrapped in a pink lace bra and my panties, which are also lace, leave little to the imagination. But I’m not self-conscious, so I’m not embarrassed to stand before him like this, after all, it’s no different than if I was wearing a bikini.
Pulling the door back, I gesture for him to come inside, and he smiles and nods walking in. I close the door and follow him into my suite as he takes a seat on my bed. I walk over to the two-seater sofa and sit down.
“I’m having a crap morning, that’s all.” I tilt my head while I chew on my bottom lip. “Was there something you came here specifically to ask me?”
He claps his hands together. “Yes. Tomorrow night, in Montana… can we start the first of our extended sets?”
I furrow my brows, wondering why he came to my room to ask me this now. When he could have asked me that question on the jet, or at the airport, or even at the hotel in Montana.
“Yes, that’s the plan.”
“Epic,” he gushes looking me in the eyes.
I don’t want to be rude and be the first one to look away, but he isn’t looking away from me either, and now we’re looking at each other for a pass too long. It’s awkward, and I swallow hard as he chuckles, finally breaking my gaze and looking around my hotel room at the mess I’ve left it in.
“So… you do know the jet leaves in like an hour, right?” he asks.
“Shit!” I murmur as he chuckles to himself and stands up, moving around my room picking up pieces of clothing and starts piling them on the bed.
Furrowing my brows, I watch as he continues moving my shit around and feeling more and more uncomfortable.
“What are you doing?”
Jett turns to me, picking up a pair of my bras from the floor with a sly smirk when there’s a knock at the door. He turns and steps over to the door, with my bras dangling from his fingers and pulls the door back.
Standing there is Mercs, his backpack over his shoulder with a hard look on his face.
My breath catches in my throat.
Mercs’ eyes drift down to the bra in Jett’s fingers, and then back up to his eyes. The cold glare he gives Jett leaves nothing to the imagination as his face contorts in undeniable rage. Dropping his backpack to the floor with a thud, he steps forward grabbing Jett forcefully by his collar shoving him back through the door with a grunt.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Jett snarls.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, you little prick?” Mercs retaliates.
Jett starts to chuckle as he brings his hands up knocking Merc’s grip from his collar and taking a step back.
My heart is racing as I watch the two men face off in front of me. I want to get in between them, but I know I need to stand back and let Mercs handle it as I’m not sure what’s really going on with him right now.
“I’m just helping her pack, and I came to ask about our extended set. So what’s your damn issue?”
“My fucking issue is you in here, holding Effa’s bra, with her half naked, and thinking you have a damn chance. But I have news for you, she’s mine. So get the fuck out before I throw you out.”
I raise my brow at Mercs’ harsh words, not in surprise but in awe. Seems maybe I have it wrong. Maybe he didn’t leave my room out of fear, or not wanting to be with me. Perhaps I worked it all up in my own mind and there’s another reason for his leaving. But I have to admit, watching him go all alpha on Jett’s ass like this is kind of hot.
Jett tosses the bra to one side, shrugs his shoulders and starts to head for the door. “I’ll catch you later, cupcake.”
Mercs quickly stalks behind Jett, and once Jett has opened the door, Mercs gives him one almighty shove and slams the door behind him.
My head tilts to the side. “Hmmm…” I murmur as he turns around stalking back toward me. His eyes glaze over and become hooded as he steps up in front of me.
“When you’re wearing something as damn sexy as that…” he runs his eyes up and down my body appreciatively, “… it should be reserved only for me. My eyes should be the only ones that see you dressed like this.”
His hands reach out and pull me to him. I let out a gasp as our bodies connect. Mercs’ hand slides up and grabs a bunch of my hair and yanks me forward. His lips burning mine as they touch forcefully, and with such intensity, in a passionate kiss.
My body instantly reacts to him and my hands rush around his back as I melt into him. We continue to kiss, his tongue dancing with mine. I’m not sure how, but he intensifies the kiss and pushes me into my bedroom against the wall. His body now encasing mine and pushing so hard, all I feel is him against my bare skin. Everything about this is a massive turn on, and if it wasn’t for the fact that we need to catch a flight soon, we would be taking this to the next level. But unfortunately, I need to cool this down so I can pack and we can leave in time to catch our flight.
I slowly stop the kiss, and Mercs pulls back looking into my eyes as we both pant for breath. He leans his forehead on mine and we both stare at each other for a few seconds.
“Mercs, as much as I want this to go further, I need to pack. We have a plane to catch in less than an hour.”
“I’ll help you pack, even though that’s the last thing I want to do. I want to remove your underwear, and take you right here, right now.”
I clear my throat, knowing he’s serious but we just don’t have time. A knock sounds on the door and he groans and rearranges his cock in his pants. I can see that it’s straining against his jeans and must be uncomfortable.
“That better not be that fucker back again.”
“Mercs, I kinda like this protective side of you.”
Mercs smirks at me and then moves to the door, while I start to get dressed. I hear the door open and Luke begins to speak. “Why are you two still in here. The bus is ready to leave, get your fucking asses into gear now.”
“Effa’s just packing the last of her things, we’ll be down soon.”
“Make sure you are. Everyone’s waiting.”
I hear the door close, and Mercs steps back into the bedroom and starts to help pack up all my scattered clothing from across the floor. Looking to him, I wonder where he went last night and figure we have to talk about this on the jet.
Knowing that he came back sets my mind at ease, but also knowing that he left has me slightly unsettled. Not only that, I’m sure he has a few questions about Jett being in my room and me in my underwear.
This is going to be an uncomfortable flight.