LAUREN

 

I stayed at Peta’s that night, stuffed into the spare single bed in Henry’s room. Thankfully, he didn’t cry. But I did. I felt like I had lost Gabe but at the same time, I was so angry with him.

He didn’t call the next day or turn up for his shift at work. I worked the close alone, thankful for the peace and quiet to reflect on my thoughts. I kept returning to Drew’s words, ‘I know how to handle him when he gets like this’. What did he mean by that? Was this sort of behaviour something Gabe did regularly? The jealousy I could have handled but the sulking afterwards was too much. I tried his cell phone multiple times before giving up and admitting to myself I was too old for these games. If he didn’t want to talk to me, then why should I chase him? I wasn’t the one who punched a stranger. I wasn’t the one who threw a fit simply because I wouldn’t go as his partner to the end of year work function.

Resisting the urge to throw my phone into the sink, I placed it carefully on the counter. I couldn’t reward him for bad behaviour by repeatedly calling him and begging for him to talk to me. I couldn’t chase him every time he threw his toys.

Just before I was about to shut the doors for the night, Drew walked inside. My heart jumped, hoping that Gabe would be with him but he was alone.

He stood before me, hands stuffed in his pockets. “Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” I said quietly and wiped at an imaginary spot on the counter.

“He’s in hospital.”

I froze. “What? What happened?”

“Those guys that he taunted last night followed him down the street and beat the shit out of him before I could find him. I’ve just been down there.”

Without realising what I was doing, I began to untie my apron and walk to the front of the store.

“Wait,” Drew called. “He doesn’t want you there.”

I sunk to one of the chairs and Drew came to sit beside me.

“Is he okay?” I managed to croak out.

“Fractured rib, but the rest is just bruising. He’ll get out tomorrow, they think. He received a rather nasty knock to the head, so they want to keep him in another night for observation.”

“He didn’t call,” I said, glancing over at where my phone lay discarded on the counter.

“He lost his phone. I spent all night searching for him, but it wasn’t until I remembered last time that I thought of the hospital.”

I stood. “I should go down there.”

Drew reached out and pulled me back down to the seat. “His mother is with him. He’s fine. Just give him a little time. He’s feeling like shit about the whole thing.”

All the anger I had been feeling earlier melted away. I hung my head and covered my face with my hands. “Does he do this a lot?”

Drew looked down. “Only when he goes dark.”

“Goes dark? What does that even mean?”

Drew sighed heavily. “It hit him really hard when his brother died. For months, my life simply existed to follow Gabe around while all he did was drink, fight and fuck.” His eyes darted to me in an apology. “Sorry. He kept getting in fights until there was no fight left.” Drew looked down at the ground and then back up at me. “Can I ask what happened between you two? I haven’t seen him this bad in ages.”

“He wanted to tell people.”

Drew frowned. “Tell people what?”

I lowered my voice, the words almost painful. “I didn’t want people knowing we were together and he did.”

“Oh,” was all Drew said.

“Yeah.”

After a long silence, Drew stood. “Look, he’s got a heart of gold and I love him, but the gold just turns dark sometimes. We’ve all got a bit of darkness, Gabe’s just not great at hiding his. And for whatever reason, this thing between you has hit him hard.”

“I want to see him,” I said.

“Just give him a few days to lick his wounds, okay?”

I said okay but as soon as he left, I quickly closed the café, leaving the cleaning of the cabinets for the morning staff and headed straight for the hospital. A nurse showed me to his room, scolding me for visiting after hours. He lay on the bed, shirtless, his chest covered in bruises and his eyes black. His lip was split and his jaw was painfully swollen. He didn’t say anything to me as I sat on the chair beside his bed and reached out to take his hand.

He pulled away. “I told him to tell you not to come.”

I placed my hand back in my lap. “He did. But I came anyway.”

“You shouldn’t have.”

I shrugged. “Well, I did.” I moved the chair a little closer. “Are you in pain?”

“I’m sorry,” he blurted out. “I was stupid, again. I just can’t seem to help myself. I never meant to do any of it. I never meant to punch that man, I just saw red when he shoved me away from you like that.”

I placed my hand back on the bed beside his, but not touching. He moved his fingers a fraction closer and I took them, my heart swelling when our skin connected. “Gabe, I—”

The door opened and I quickly withdrew my fingers, earning a withering look from Gabe just as a lady dressed in long flowing clothing, and looking like something out of the seventies, stepped inside and looked at Gabe questioningly. “Gable?” she asked.

“Mum, this is Lauren. We work together. Lauren, this is my mother, Lynda.”

She smiled sweetly at me as I got to my feet to shake her hand. She looked nothing like Gabe. Her hair was dark and streaked with grey, and the layered long skirts and flowing tops made her look like she should be adorned with flowers in her hair and driving a spray painted van.

“Nice to meet you,” she said.

“You too.” I wasn’t sure what else to say. Gabe obviously hadn’t told her anything about us, but I guess that was what I wanted. So why did I feel disappointed at being introduced to his mother as nothing more than a workmate?

Both Lynda and I stood awkwardly in the room, Gabe’s eyes firmly on his mother and not me. Finally, he spoke. “I’ll call you when I get out, okay, Lauren?” The way he said my name left me cold.

“Okay,” I stammered.

“Nice to meet you,” his mother called after me when I walked out the door. As soon as I was gone I heard her turn to Gabe and ask, “So who was she?”

“Nobody,” he replied. “Just someone I work with.”

* * *

After talking with Peta, she agreed I could have the next day off, so I spent it waiting for Gabe’s call. It never came. Finally, at nine o’clock in the evening, I admitted defeat and was walking down to the bedroom, Smudge purring contentedly in my arms when the doorbell rang. I dropped Smudge and flew to the door, pulling it open, desperately hoping that it would be Gabe on the other side.

“Gabe,” I breathed when I saw him. His hair was slicked to his face with droplets of rain and his white t-shirt clung to the swells of his chest. Even with the swelling around his jaw and the bruising around his eyes, I had never seen him look so sexy. He strode through the door forcefully and came at me, causing me to stumble backwards until I was pressed against the wall, arms caging me. His eyes were so blue, surrounded by the darkness, and they shone with an intensity that caused my knees to shake.

I reached out and stroked the swollen purple patch across his chin. “Are you okay?”

He didn’t answer, but instead, closed his eyes as my finger traced his jaw, breathing heavily. I drew my finger across his skin and tenderly ran it over the swelling of his lip, careful to avoid the open cut, although it was clear of blood.

“Are you okay?” I repeated breathlessly.

Gabe tilted his chin, inching towards me until our lips met and we kissed. It was gentle at first, his lips brushing against mine like a feather, but as he leaned closer, pressing his body to mine, his kiss intensified and deepened. I was scared it would hurt him and tried to pull away, but he pressed harder, not appearing to notice the way his lip dragged roughly against mine. My breathing hitched as he pressed every inch of his body against mine. His hardness pressed into me, begging for attention. Moving his kiss from my lips, he trailed across my cheek and moved down until he came to the soft flesh in the curve of my neck. I winced as he sunk his teeth in and sucked hard, marking me, claiming me with his mouth. But I didn’t protest.

Once content, Gabe drew back and ran his hand over the deep purple mark that now stained my neck, his eyes dark and hungry. His finger followed the line of my collarbone, leaving sparks of desire in its wake until it rested on the first button of my top. My heart was in my throat as he looked deeply into my eyes before they fell to my now heaving chest. Moving methodically, he undid each button and then slipped my shirt off my shoulders, allowing it to fall to the ground. Without speaking, he turned me around and unclasped my bra, my breasts swollen and heavy in anticipation. Falling to his knees, he pulled my pants and underwear down, his breath teasing my flesh with heat as his hands travelled down my sides and pulled my clothes out from under my feet.

Then he turned me around so I stood naked before him, my back pressed against the wall. He was still fully clothed as he bent his head and lay a trail of kisses from my neck down between my breasts, and over my stomach until he drew in a deep breath and groaned when he reached his destination. But he didn’t touch. He inhaled deeply before standing back up and turning me around again so my front was splayed against the wall. He held me there as he kissed every inch of flesh from my neck to my feet, his hands roaming over the places his mouth wasn’t.

For a moment, my awareness focussed on the open curtains of the window behind me, exposing us to anyone that chose to walk up the driveway, but it was only a fleeting thought as Gabe’s mouth scrambled my brain. My chest rose and fell heavily the more he teased with his mouth. Not one inch was left unattended. I’m not sure when he undressed, but soon he was naked and pressed against my back, grinding himself against me as his mouth came back to my neck.

“I don’t ever want another man to touch you,” he growled in my ear. But in that moment, other men didn’t exist. I wasn’t even aware of them being on the same planet.

He pushed me harder against the wall, flattening my breasts against the patterned wallpaper. I gasped as his cock pressed into the cheeks of my buttocks. “I want you.” Turning me around, Gabe slid down my body until I felt his tongue teasing me, begging for me to open to him. I reached down and ran my fingers through his hair, pulling and tugging the long strands as his tongue lapped, pushing him further into me until the intensity was almost too much.

“Stop,” I panted, scared I wouldn’t be able to resist the sensations that were now crashing against my skull, my chest, and pulsating in my very depths. But he only intensified his efforts, groaning gloriously as I cried out and dissolved over him, sliding down the wall and slumping to the floor. With no time to recover, Gabe dragged me under him and rose over me, his eyes dark and needy and determined. “I want you,” he said again. “All of you. Only you.” He entered me slowly and I arched off the floor, my insides tender and sensitive from their recent explosion. But Gabe didn’t stop. He rocked in and out, staring down at me from burning eyes. “I don’t care about the age difference,” he said, as he thrust into me. “I don’t care if I’m your dirty little secret.” He fucked me slow but hard, grunting each time he thrust. “I want you.”

As he started to move faster, my body responded, tightness and anticipation rising within me again. I reached up and ran my fingers over his glorious chest then over his shoulders, digging my nails into his back and leaving my mark. The hair that hung around his face jolted every time he moved, and I looked up at him, marvelling that this beautiful man wanted me. Not someone else. Not someone with perfect unmarked skin and flawless features. Me.

Tracing the bruising on his face, I pressed my hand to the swollen flesh of his ribs. He winced, but it only made him move faster and harder. He drove into me time and time again and I whimpered with pleasure. He was so hard, I started to quiver around his length, unable to control myself for much longer. Pushing into me, he held himself still, looking into my eyes. “I want you, Lauren. And I will take whatever I can get.” And then he fucked me hard and fast until I couldn’t stand it anymore and surrendered myself, crying out as wave after wave of pleasure pulsated through me. I dug my nails into his arms and my insides gripped against his hardness, the cause of his undoing.

He slumped over me after he came, breathing heavily. “I love you, Lauren Greer,” he whispered in my ear. “I don’t ever want to be without you, whether anyone ever knows it or not.”