14
Kendra
I was awake before Alex and helped myself to one of her bananas.
Angling the piece of fruit from side to side, I studied the curvature, measuring its girth by circling my fingers around it. Then I reached to pluck two bright orange tangerines out of the fruit bowl and placed them on the counter in front of me.
I looked back at the banana, then to the tangerines, then back to the banana before setting the banana directly in the middle of the two tangerines.
“Do you ever think about anything else?”
My head spun over my shoulder as I giggled. Alex had her hand fisted in her messy hair, holding it up and away from her face. “I’m debating whether or not I should eat it for breakfast,” I said.
Alex’s mouth parted as her forehead scrunched. “And you thought it might sound more appetizing if you first made it look like a giant cock?”
I turned to look at my yellow and orange masterpiece. “Well, yeah.”
Alex padded to the counter and pulled out a box of cereal. “There are other options, you know?”
I dropped my banana to the counter, turned so my tailbone rested on the edge of the counter, and folded my arms. “That looks all fine and dandy, but do you know how much sugar is in one serving of that?”
Alex didn’t bother looking at me. Instead, she went straight for the coffee maker, loading it up with grounds and flipping the switch before pulling a bowl from the cabinet above.
“Well, let me tell you.” I nodded at the box. “It’s a fuck-ton. And with Kelly demanding I eat better, I think I’ll stick with fruit.”
Alex shrugged, opening the box of cereal and making herself a bowl.
My brows squished. “Really?”
“What?” Alex said with milk dripping out of the corners of her mouth.
“We’re supposed to do this together.”
“Oh, no.” She swallowed her food. “That’s your thing. Not mine. I can eat whatever I want.”
“What about the agreement we made?”
“Huh?” Her brow arched.
“You know. The one we made at the spa?” When Alex’s forehead was still twisted in confusion I continued, “The one about getting in shape with me. Working out. Eating well. Going to the gym?”
Alex spooned another large spoonful of cereal into her mouth.
“Ah, never mind,” I said, waving my hand at her before peeling the banana.
We stood there in silence, watching the coffee brew. She munched away on her cereal and I chomped down the sweet banana. It didn’t matter if I had to go this alone. Kelly gave me reason to think about my health, most importantly what I ate. It wasn’t that my diet was bad before I met him, but I could cut out more of the processed foods that I knew weren’t all that good for me.
“Hope I didn’t wake you when I came in last night,” Alex murmured as she finished her bowl, setting it in the sink.
“What time did you get in, anyway?”
It wasn’t that Alex didn’t expect me to sleep at her place again, but maybe it was a little sooner than either of us would have thought. But with the way my night had gone—with Kelly leaving and my mind struggling to comprehend what I thought I saw—there was no way I was going to sleep at my place, alone. I needed company, or at least the illusion of it, because no matter how much I refused to believe what I knew I’d seen, his face lurked in the shadows of my mind all damn night.
“After midnight,” Alex said, blinking away her exhaustion.
“Nash is working you like a dog.”
“It’s this film. We’re on a budget and a tight deadline.”
“I guess you have to be careful with what you wish for.” I directed my comment to Alex, but really it could be applied to me, too.
Alex floated to the coffee maker. Holding up a cup, I nodded and she proceeded to fill both of our cups to the rim. “I’ll need the extra boost today,” she said, handing me my cup. “I’ve got another long day ahead of me.”
I thanked her and curled my lips over the mug. The hot liquid was robust and immediately packed a punch. “Whoa, you aren’t kidding. This stuff is strong.”
“How’d you sleep?” Her sleepy eyes peered over her mug as her forehead wrinkled with a hint a worry.
“Okay,” I cast my gaze into the black liquid abyss, “considering.”
Memories of last night immediately betrayed me. It was easy to think that none of it happened. That it was all a dream. I could go on with my day without having to confront the demons of my past or answer to a concerned friend. It wasn’t that I didn’t invite, or appreciate, Alex’s thoughts on everything that had become my life, because I did. It was just that we didn’t always see things the same way. Sometimes I hesitated in telling her too much.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Alex’s lips thinned into a flat line and her face grew stern.
Determined to forget everything and move on with my life, I ducked my head and turned to my tangerines. Staring at the two orange balls, I thought more about Kelly and why he left me—whatever that reason was, I still didn’t know. And even though those questions went unanswered, I still imagined him coming home to find me gone. “There’s nothing more to say.”
Alex watched me leave the kitchen and jump into the far corner of the couch. “I’m happy you came here,” Alex moved to the window, “even if I wasn’t home when you arrived.” She turned to look over her shoulder. “I like finding you here.”
“I’m liking this, too.” I smiled. “I hope Nash never comes home.”
Alex scurried over to the couch and tossed a pillow at my head. My arms deflected it and we both laughed. Taking her mind off me and reminding her what was missing in her own life was my best defense to not having to talk any more about who I might have seen or what Kelly was up to without me. Because the truth always had a way at coming out. I just didn’t want it to have to be now.
Alex snuggled up against me. Pulling her knees to her chest, she hugged her legs and asked, “Does Kelly know about who you saw last night?”
My chin tipped to the ceiling until the back of my head fell to the back of the couch. “You know I can’t tell him.” I sighed.
“Then,” Alex angled her head to look at me, “who can you tell?”
She wasn’t going to let this go. Her persistence was as annoying as my own. I loved her and hated her for it. There would come a time when I felt comfortable telling her more of what my childhood was like and what happened to me, but that time wasn’t now. There was too much I needed to work out with Kelly first. “I’m sure I was just seeing things.”
Alex looked at me. Shaking her head, she clucked her tongue then stepped away, moving back to the kitchen where she topped off her coffee. “The way you’re dealing with this isn’t healthy.”
I covered my face inside my hands. “But it’s my way of doing things.”
When I removed my hands, Alex was hovering over me. “What is it?”
“What is what?” I snapped.
“There’s something you’re not telling me.”
I sprang to my feet and tossed my arms around Alex’s neck.
“Kendra!” Alex pushed me off, wiping at the coffee I spilled on her shirt.
“I do apologize, my dear.” I curtsied, getting Alex to giggle. Pulling my hair back into a ponytail, I walked away saying, “Kelly took me to the Mayor’s ball last night.”
“Is that where you saw him?”
My hands flung to my sides and I huffed. “Can you please just drop it?”
“Probably not. But go on.” She set her mug down on the coffee table and sank into the couch with inquisitive ears. “So, your man fancied you to the Mayor’s mansion?”
“That’s right.” My insides warmed at memories of Kelly’s fingers probing me while spread on the Mayor’s desk. “There’s a woman I keep seeing.”
“Is she nice?”
“It’s not like that.” I shook my head. “And no, she’s not nice. She keeps telling me to be careful with Kelly.”
“What? Like he might hurt you?”
“She makes me think that maybe Kelly can’t be trusted.”
“But you do trust him?” Her eyes peered at me from under her brow.
I tucked my hands under my armpits as I moved to the window. I felt a headache coming on. A part of me said, of course I trust him. But the more reserved corner of my brain reasoned that I didn’t know him well enough to know what trusting him even meant.
“You do trust him, don’t you, Kendra?”
“He lies for a living,” I said quietly.
“Unbelievable.” Alex slapped her thigh. “You can’t keep having doubts about him if you want this to work.”
“Do you think she could be right?” I twisted around to find Alex lift her eyes up to meet mine. “I mean, I shouldn’t expect a man like Kelly to not have other women in his life, right?”
Alex dropped her feet to the floor and padded over to me. Smoothing her hands down my arms, she said, “It depends who you trust more. Him or her?”
I swallowed the lump down my constricted throat. “I’m afraid I’m starting to believe her.”
Alex reached around my head and pulled me against her soft body. “Did Kelly kick you out?”
I pulled my head back with knitted brows. “God, no. Why would you think that?”
She shrugged. “Why else would you have stayed here and not gone to his place last night?”
I stepped back, tucking a loose strand behind my ear. “It’s complicated.”
“I wish you would have never done this.” Alex pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed.
“And you think that you could have handled the Madam better than me?” I raised an eyebrow and huffed. “Hardly.”
Alex giggled. “Have you mentioned any of this to Madam?”
“Are you kidding? With the warnings she first tossed at me, telling me to stay away from Kelly—”
“—But would she have allowed you to be with him for a month if he really was involved with another woman?”
My shoulders shrugged.
“It doesn’t make sense.”
Gazing out the window, I watched the white clouds spread and swirl against the blue sky. Pain hit my heart and spread across my chest. I didn’t want to think of Kelly being with anybody but me.
“Madam wants to protect her interests.” Alex came up from behind and hugged me. “And, in case you forgot, you’re her interest.”
“I know.” My voice was as weak as I felt.
“What about those files you stole? Have you thoroughly searched those?”
“You think Kelly could be in there?”
“I think it’s worth exploring.”
“Perhaps you’re right,” I murmured. When I had opened them in the past, it was only to learn as much about Madam as I could. It hadn’t occurred to me to see if Kelly’s name was anywhere to be found as well.
“Tell me how I can help.”
Skeptically I said, “I wouldn’t mind if you spied on him for me.”
“You know I can’t do that. Kelly knows who I am, and besides, he’s still after Nash for questions he has about that girl’s murder.”
Flipping around to face her I said, “And what if Angel is right? What if there is another woman?”
“And what if the person you saw last night really was your rapist?”
I gritted my teeth, nostrils flaring. “You asked how you can help, and now that I did, you’re not willing to do it?”
Alex’s chest expanded as she looked away. Her lips pursed when she blew out a heavy breath. Then she looked at me and said, “All right. I’ll spy on him for you.”
“Thank you,” I whispered.
“But only this once.”