I pushed the salad around my plate and sighed. I wasn’t sure why I was so surprised by Taylor’s behaviour. It wasn’t like I hadn’t been warned about him. My instincts should’ve told me how this whole thing would play out. I should never have listened to my heart instead of my head. I only had myself to blame. It didn’t help that Taylor was still everywhere I went, forcing me to remember everything I felt for him. I would never be able to escape the pain of seeing him, even if I wanted to.

“Okay, I wasn’t going to ask but this is getting ridiculous,” Brie said, tossing her napkin down on her plate. “Come on, tell me what’s happened that’s got you so wound up.”

“It’s nothing,” I lied.

“Granted, I haven’t known you that long, but I have known you long enough to know when something is up. Is it that Doctor Whatshisface?”

“Jacobs. Doctor Jacobs. And no.”

“So the parents then?” She shrugged. “That makes sense. Mine are being totally unreasonable. Can you believe they are making me spend Christmas at some stupid lake house in the Cotswolds?”

“I dunno. That sounds pretty perfect right now. Maybe we could trade places?”

Brie frowned and turned in her seat to face me. “What’s he done?”

I knew who she meant, but that didn’t stop me asking.

“Don’t play dumb. You know exactly who I’m talking about.”

“You know what? I didn’t ask to help him. In fact, I didn’t even want to, but I did it anyway because I’m stupid like that, and shock… I actually thought he would take this seriously, but no. He couldn’t even be bothered to show up. Funny thing is, I don’t even blame him. I blame myself because I should’ve known better.” I blew out a breath and dropped my head back.

“He cancelled on you?”

“No, he didn’t cancel on me. He just didn’t show up. No call, no text, nothing. Zilch.”

“That’s… weird. Rye hasn’t mentioned anything. I could ask him? See what’s going on?”

“Are you guys speaking now?” I asked, shocked that she would take him back so soon after finding out about Mel.

Brie shrugged. “We’re working on it. He knows how I feel. I don’t think he’ll do it again.”

“I hate Melanie.” I frowned.

“Oh, trust me, I haven’t even started with her yet.” She winked. “Anyway, forget about that—back to you. Let me see if I can find out what’s going on, ‘kay?”

I shook my head, no. “Forget it. I’m seriously over it now.”

“It sure as hell doesn’t seem like you are.”

“I am. I just needed to get it off my chest and now I have, I’m cool.”

Brie opened her mouth to argue but quickly snapped it shut. Her face had changed from confused to angry in seconds. I wondered if I’d said something to piss her off. It couldn’t be easy being friends with the both of us. I hadn’t thought about how Brie would feel if things turned to shit. I was a crappy friend. Just as I got lost in my own thoughts, a commotion pulled me into the now and I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see Taylor entering the canteen with a pleased looking Melanie attached to his side. He glanced my way but, as usual, turned his attention away as if I wasn’t sat there.

“What the…? Come on, Lo. We’re not staying here to witness this,” Brie said, still angry.

I wanted to tell her that I didn’t care, that Taylor could do what the hell he liked because there was nothing between us. As much as that statement was true to a point, I didn’t think I could stomach seeing the two of them together. We both stood at the same time, depositing our trays of uneaten food on the counter on our way out.

“Bastards. Look at them. Absolute wankers,” Brie cursed and I cringed. The last thing I wanted was to cause a scene and have him see how much his little display was getting to me.

“Babe,” Riley called out. He was standing with Taylor and Melanie, along with a few of the other guys from the team. Brie shot him a look that showed she was clearly pissed off and not to be messed with, and stormed off.

I struggled to keep up with her. “Hey, slow down. My legs are nowhere near as long as yours.”

She stopped dead in her tracks and let out a scream. “I can’t believe him! What a complete cock sucking mother fucker.”

“It’s not Riley’s fault, B. Don’t let this come between you guys,” I told her.

She turned to face me and folded her arms across her chest, scowling. “He’s encouraging it. And after everything he did with that slut, there he is, encouraging Taylor to do the same. I don’t get it. Why would he do that? I’m so glad nothing happened between you two, Lo. Seriously. I would’ve killed him.”

I’d always wondered how the other girls felt when they were in my position. Getting ditched by Taylor wasn’t something a girl could get over so easily. I’d seen the ones who had been hurt by him. I had only been here a short while but it was apparent who had come apart at the hands of Taylor Fuckin’ Lawson. They watched him go about his day without a care in the world while all they could do was sit by and try desperately to mend their broken hearts. Some were angry and bitter, and resented the next girl who came along. Then you had the girls who tried their hardest not to show any emotion at all. They were the ones who would eagerly go back to him given the chance. He’d only have to click his perfect, commanding fingers and bam! They were goners.

Then there was me.

I wasn’t sure which category I fell into. All I knew was that I was more than a little thankful that I hadn’t let things get too serious between Taylor and me. I guess you could say that I was one of the lucky ones.

A part of me wanted to believe that Taylor was different around me. He’d seemed that way, and I’d hoped he saw me as more than a piece of arse or another notch on his ever-growing bedpost. But that was the thing about Taylor Lawson. He made you feel like you were different. Special, even. Taking the time to get to know you until the time came to screw you over.

I was edging towards the I couldn’t give a fuck category. There was no way I would let him see how much he had hurt me…

How much he’d embarrassed me.

How much I hated that he had given me the best damn orgasm of my life and now he was laughing at me.

With her.

Why her?

I had thought that Melanie was resilient, but I’d been wrong. She was just like the rest of us in so many ways. Overcome with feelings for a boy who wasn’t capable of showing an ounce of emotion or compassion for the things he had done and still continued to do. The difference between Melanie and me was simple. I wouldn’t be getting screwed over again.

“You guys just kissed, right? I mean, nothing else happened?”

“Please, can we just drop it, B? It really isn’t a big deal.”

“Kissing Taylor is definitely not nothing and it definitely is a big deal. There’s something else, isn’t there? What aren’t you telling me?” Her face dropped and I instantly felt bad.

“Quiet,” I pleaded. “When I was sick, he came over. That’s when it all started. I wasn’t sure how I felt at the time. I mean, this was Taylor after all. But then things got weird and there was that weekend away…” I paused.

“Something happened that night, didn’t it?”

“We kind of… He… We didn’t have sex or anything,” I quickly added. “But something did happen.”

“I knew it. I damn well knew something had happened. I told him not to hurt you. In the morning while you were sleeping, I told him to be careful with you. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me, Lo. I figured if something had happened then you would’ve told me. God, now I really fucking hate him.”

She did have a point. I wasn’t sure why I hadn’t mentioned the other stuff to her. I guess a part of me had known that nothing would come of it. The fewer people who knew, the less chance I had of feeling embarrassed when I was eventually proven right.

Sighing, I once again reminded her that it really wasn’t a big deal, but she wouldn’t look at me. I could tell she was mad as hell. “Don’t be mad at me, B. I’m sorry for not telling you. I know that I should have. I don’t even know why I didn’t.”

Brie rolled her eyes and turned her attention back on me. “I’m not mad at you, silly. I’m fucking pissed at him. I should have warned you about him. Instead, I pushed the two of you together. I’m sorry for that. After everything you’ve been through, I should’ve known he was the last person you needed to be around. I guess I just wanted you to be happy for once. You were so sad, and whether I hate to admit it or not, for a while he made you happy. I could see that.”

“He did,” I agreed. “But I’m not made of glass. I won’t break,” I told her. I wasn’t sure how much of that statement was true. Taylor had made me feel things I’d never thought possible. With him, I was able to forget about everything and just feel normal for a change. I didn’t have to pretend to be anything. He saw me for me. Or at least I’d thought he had.

“You really liked him, huh?”

“Yes,” I replied honestly. Brie smiled flatly and threw her arms around me, holding me tightly.

“I’m sorry he did this to you.”

“That’s the way the world works. Someone shits on you and you deal with it. There’s no use wallowing over things we can’t control.” If only I’d believed what I was saying. The whole Taylor thing would have been so much easier to deal with.

Brie eventually pulled back, her face taking on a look of pride as she said, “You’re strong. After everything that happened…” She shook her head. “I wish I was more like you.”

“You’re kidding, right?” I snorted. “You are one of the strongest girls I know. Granted, you’re the only girl I really know.” I laughed lightly. “But still. You are strong, brilliant, beautiful, and the best friend a girl could have,” I said honestly.

Her eyes glistened and she brought her thumb up, brushing away a stray tear. “I love you.” She sniffed, and this time I was the one to give her a hug.

“Love you right back,” I said, pulling away.

“Good, because I have just the thing to help you get over Taylor.”

“Oh no, I’m not sure I want to know.” I laughed.

“You don’t have to. Yet. I just need you to trust me, ‘kay?”

“Brie…” I started.

“Trust me.”

“Okay, fine.” I sighed, tossing my hands in the air. “I trust you.”

After the party at Jake’s house, I wasn’t sure if that was entirely true, but I would try anything if it meant putting an end to the feelings I had for jerk face.