Sleep didn’t come easy for me that night. Having Taylor so close to me had left me feeling all foggy, and I wasn’t sure what to make of the whole thing. I’d thought we were getting somewhere and I had a feeling that Taylor had said more to me in the few short moments we spent together last night than he ever had to anyone else. I wanted to be angry at Brie for interrupting us, and a part of me still was, but I was also thankful because Taylor had this way of making me feel things I didn’t want to. I was too messed up to even consider a friendship, let alone anything else. Not that Taylor would ever have gone there. I mean, I was me and he was… He was Taylor Lawson. I needed to draw a line under everything I felt because it was stupid.

Turning my head to the side, I let out a gasp. Two eyes silently bored into mine, inches away from my face.

“Fucking hell, Brie. Why the hell are you staring at me?” I said, alarm striking my vocal chords as if I’d been caught doing something I shouldn’t have been. I could feel the blush creeping up on me.

Brie shuffled to sit upright and dropped her head back to rest on the headboard before sighing dramatically. “Just thinking, that’s all.”

“About?”

“Nothing important,” she said, shaking her head dismissively. “It doesn't matter. Anyway, less about me more about you and how you ditched me last night.”

“Umm… In case you’ve forgotten, I had no choice,” I said, pursing my lips.

“Oh, God. Don’t remind me. That was freaking hot.”

Groaning, I shook my head and laughed at how ridiculously warped her mind was. “You are seriously disturbed.”

“Maybe so, but seriously, you should have seen Melanie’s face when Taylor pulled you away. I swear, I thought she was gonna have a hissy fit. And then when he didn’t return… Gah!”

“Well, I guess I should be glad I wasn’t around to see it, but that would be a lie. I’m actually pretty pissed I missed it,” I confessed.

“I bet there’re hundreds of pictures scattered all over Facebook by now. You’ll see for yourself soon enough,” she said with a wink. “Ooh, speaking of pictures,” she rushed out, digging her hand under the pillow as if searching for something. “Who is this and why the hell isn’t he in my freakin’ life?”

I glanced at the picture in her hand and snatched it up before turning it over to examine it. “Where did you find this?” I all but yelled, instantly regretting it when Brie’s eyes bulged out of her head. I had never raised my voice with her before, and I definitely wouldn’t be making a habit of it.

“Sorry, you were taking ages to wake up and I wanted to know what happened with you and Taylor last night. I got bored and found this box under your bed, and I found that,” she added apologetically. “I’m sorry for snooping, Lo. You know what I’m like. I can’t help it. It’s like an itch that needs to be scratched.”

Glancing down at the rectangular photo, I shrugged. “It’s okay. You just threw me, that’s all. I’m sorry for snapping.” And I meant it. I never snapped at anyone, but lately that’s all I did. First Doctor Jacobs, now Brie. Yet another reason I should stay clear of Taylor. He was messing with my hormones and turning me into some kind of sexually frustrated, tormented tart who started fights for no reason. Okay, so I had a valid reason, but still, that wasn’t like me at all.

“You’re forgiven,” she said. “But, are you going to tell me who this is or do I need to tickle it out of you?”

“Don’t you fucking dare,” I warned before glancing at the picture I loved so much. “Apparently,” I said, flipping it over and pointing to the back, “that’s Austin.”

It had been a few months since I’d last seen his face. Not his real face, just the photo. I had a few of them, but this was my absolute favourite. Austin was smiling up at something, his perfect profile showcasing just how truly beautiful he was. There were a few like this. There was also some of me, but they weren’t beautiful in any way, shape or form. Someone had clearly taken them without me knowing. They were awful and only concentrated on my nose and how crooked it was. Not that I was vain, but hey, we all have certain flaws that have a way of getting to us. My small, slightly off-centre nose was mine.

“Shit! Even his name is hot,” she blurted out and I rolled my eyes. “Sorry, that was really thoughtless of me. Mum always said I should think before I speak. I’m still working on that one. So, what happened to you two? You were together, right?”

“We were, and as for what happened? College happened. A few months after the accident I found that box and these pictures were stuffed inside. I didn’t tell anyone at first. I mean, Jen said it would be best not to force myself into remembering details that could so easily set me back, but every time I looked at them—at his face—I knew I needed to know. So, I asked her. She didn’t want to tell me at first, but after pleading with her, she told me that Austin and I had broken up just before the accident and he had gone off to college. I didn’t ask any more questions. Honestly? I wasn’t sure I could handle the truth.”

“The truth?”

“Like, maybe he left me because of the accident. I mean, I was a mess and didn’t remember anything or anyone…”

“Hey, don’t think like that. Judging by the way he’s looking at you in that picture, I can’t see that he’d leave you. Not like that, and besides, your mum wouldn’t lie to you, Lo. Not about something like that.

“She would if she thought she was protecting me. Anyway, how do you know he was even looking at me?”

“Call it a lucky guess.”

“Maybe, but that doesn’t excuse the fact that he hasn’t even bothered to call me. If we were as in love as these pictures say we were then why hasn’t he called to see how I am? It doesn’t make sense.”

“Maybe he was too scared to. Like you said, after the accident you were different. Maybe he wasn’t sure how you’d handle him calling you. You also don’t remember how or why you broke up in the first place.”

“You’re right,” I agreed. “I’m being stupid.”

“Shit! What if you cheated on him with his best mate? Or worse, his dad?”

“What the hell, B?” I yelled this time and reach around for the pillow before tossing it at her. “I’m seriously concerned about your sanity.”

She let the pillow drop to the floor and let out a sarcastic laugh. “Coming from the girl who didn’t remember her own name until a year ago.”

“Bitch,” I tried to say, but it came out mixed with short puffs of laughter.

“Takes one to know one,” she hit back, twisting her head in some weird motion that made me feel dizzy and maybe a little drunk from the night before. “I wouldn’t think too much about it. He’s a guy, after all. Hey, I just had an idea. Pass me your laptop.”

“Umm… Why?”

“We need to check his Facebook. Everybody has Facebook. If we want to know what Austin’s been up to since you guys broke up, that’s how we do it.”

A tight knot formed in my chest and I shook my head. “No. I’m honestly not interested in finding out anything about Austin. I’m over it. No need to go there.” That was a lie. Ever since I had found the box of pictures I’d wanted nothing more than to know everything about him—about us. The only thing that had stopped me was the fact that he hadn’t bothered to contact me. And besides that, I wasn’t sure my heart would be able to take seeing him happy with someone else. Not that I remembered what it felt like having him in my arms, but the pictures were enough proof that we’d had something. That I’d felt something.

“Aren’t you even the least bit curious?” Brie questioned. She had that look about her that told me she didn’t believe me. She knelt on the floor before dipping her head under the bed. Her butt was in the air as she searched for my laptop.

I quickly leapt out from under the warm duvet and darted to the other side of the room, grabbing my laptop from my desk. I shoved it in the drawer and closed it. “Nope,” I said, a little flustered this time.

Poking her head out from under the bed, she frowned. “Not even a little bit?”

I rolled my eyes and folded my arms across my chest. “No. Now can we please drop it?”

“Okay. Jeez, Louise. No need to be so damn aggressive.”

“I’m not being aggressive. I’m just not interested.”

“Yeah, just like you aren’t interested in Taylor Lawson,” she countered, rolling her eyes.

“Bite me,” I teased, sticking my tongue out like a five-year-old.

“Go get laid, you grouchy cow. That’s if you can remember how to do it.”

“Ouch,” I said, trying to keep a straight face as I feigned being hurt.

“Shit, sorry. I really need to listen to my mum more, hey?”

“Yeah, you do. Now go home and leave me to sleep the day away.”

“Fine. I know when I’m not wanted.”

“Good,” I mumbled, trudging back into the confines of my bed and rolling over.

I heard Brie huffing and rummaging around on the floor before she let out a defeated and overdramatic sigh, obviously for added affect. Then she slammed the bedroom door shut behind her.

My laughter was muffled as I pressed my face against the pillow and called out, “I love you.”

“Yeah, yeah, you too,” she yelled back, and I smiled.

I really did love that girl, even if her curiosity had sent mine into overdrive.

I tried not to think about Austin or Taylor as I nuzzled into my pillow, hoping the day would swallow me up. Tomorrow would be a new day and hopefully, my shameful antics at Jake’s party would be long forgotten.