CHAPTER 21
LANA
“I haven’t heard from Joe,” Abe told me on Wednesday over the phone. “He left Monday around lunch time. Said he had to make a phone call. Then he never came back. He never showed yesterday. And now, today, his sister is here in Tacoma looking for him. She’s with me now. Says she wants to speak with you, if that’s okay.”
“Jesus,” I breathed. “Okay.”
The last two days since I left Joe hadn’t been easy. I’d bounced between anger and sadness. I’d also spent most of it working on submitting a Stalking Protection Order to the courts against Doug. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to submit one against Joe too. I was beyond mad at him, but I also couldn’t shake the feeling that he too was a victim of Doug’s craziness.
Abe must have given the phone to Kitty because the next thing I knew, she was shouting at me. “Do you know where he might be? Have you heard from him?”
“Not since Monday.”
“Monday! When on Monday?”
“When he told me everything.”
“Define everything.”
“Like everything,” I gritted.
“So all of this is your fault? Perfect. Thank you very much, Lana.”
“My fault! You’re the one with the sex tapes that started this whole mess!” Talking to Kitty was frustrating and if I wasn’t slightly worried about Joe, I’d have already hung up on her.
“Oh,” she answered, realizing she was wrong, “I guess you do know everything. Where are you? In your office? Do you know that Doug had Joe bug your office? I think he said he planted three different microphones in there somewhere. So don’t say anything else stupid that Doug might hear if you’re in your office.”
I was in my office.
Okay, I guess I didn’t know everything.
My mouth dropped open and I glanced around. Holy shit. This whole time, everything single thing that had been said in my office, Doug had been listening to! My mind immediately went back to the day Joe had my skirt around my waist. The Post-it notes he’d written me! I thought he was being sweet, now I knew he was just being careful so Doug wouldn’t hear us.
I pulled open the top drawer of my desk, taking out some of those notes I’d saved. Despite everything, I’d found it impossible to throw them away. I read over some of them now.
Don’t panic. You’re safe.
You’re my good day.
You’re so fucking beautiful. You glow.
If you’re not careful, I might fall in love with you.
It was that last one that always got to me. I pocketed my notes, knowing that I couldn’t bring myself to throw them away, finding that I still needed to keep them.
I stood from my desk and walked into my adjacent bathroom. Once inside, I turned on the water in hopes that the noise would help stifle anything I said.
“I’m going to send you a pin of the location I last saw Joe,” I told Kitty. “Beyond that, I don’t know where he might be. Have you been staying in Tacoma this week at his hotel there? Or are you back in Portland?”
“Here in Tacoma.”
“Well, has anyone been to his house?”
“Yes, I had Larry go over and check today. He wasn’t home. Short of calling Doug and asking him what he knows, I’m all out of ideas. He’s not answering his phone. He probably left it somewhere. And I’m stranded here. I don’t have a car since he has the car with him. Would you go to where you saw him last? Ask around there?”
I’d last seen him next to a motel. It was entirely possible that he never left the motel.
“Lana,” Kitty begged, “will you go there?”
“Yes.” Did I really have another choice? I was worried too.
“He’s been using or drinking. I know it. I can feel it. He wouldn’t ignore my phone calls if he was sober. Go to wherever you saw him last and start looking in nearby bars. That’s my best guess. Still send me that pin because I’ll work on finding a car rental place. If you find him, and he’s not sober, be prepared for a different Joe. A very promiscuous Joe. I know something has been going on between you two, a relationship or whatever, just try not to hate him too much if you find him in some slut’s bed. Because, seriously, he’s either fucking or drinking right now. And he can’t really control himself once he starts down that road.”
Oh dear God.
I hoped Kitty wasn’t still standing next to Abe as she said all this. And my stomach—it felt like I’d just drank a gallon of battery acid. Not to mention that my hands were shaking. He’s either fucking or drinking right now.
I left the office, got my car out of the garage, and started the hour and a half drive toward the motel I’d left Joe at on Monday.
Lord help me if I found him in another girl’s bed.
Lord help me if I didn’t.
***
The moment I arrived at the motel parking lot, I knew Joe had never left. His car still sat in the exact same spot. I texted Kitty immediately to let her know he was close. Then, walking over to the motel’s check-in desk in the front building, I found the manager.
“Can you tell me if someone named Joe Coffee is staying in one of your rooms? He’s a friend. He’s been missing for a couple of days. I last saw him here.”
The guy smacked his lips together. “Can’t give out personal information. You want a room?” He stared blankly at me.
“No, I don’t want a room. Have you seen him? That car.” I pointed out to the parking lot through the front window. “That’s his car.” It was the only car in the lot other than mine. I knew he was here somewhere.
“Can’t give out personal information,” he repeated.
“Yes, I heard you. I guess I’m going to have to go knock on individual doors. But you really could make this easier for me.”
“Have fun, miss. Can’t stop you from knocking.”
I was just about to leave and write a terrible review for this place on TripAdvisor next chance I got, when the man raised his eyebrows and glanced at something across the street. A bar. Holy crap. The bar’s name was Joe’s Bar. What a coincidence. Kitty told me to look for a bar close by and there one was.
“Oh my God, thank you,” I said to the man.
“I didn’t say nothing,” he shouted after me as I left him and raced out the door.
I nearly got hit by a tractor trailer as I ran across the four-lane road that separated the motel from the bar across the street.
Fueled by adrenaline, I didn’t hesitate—when I probably should have—as I pushed open the doors to Joe’s Bar. Bikers in black leather were everywhere. And cigarette smoke clouded the air when I was pretty sure smoking in public places like this had been made illegal years ago.
I was one of the only women in the room. Everyone else was either a grizzly biker dude—with a beard like a mountain man’s—or a biker woman. I stuck out in my white pantsuit and the dramatic red statement necklace I’d decided to wear today. Heads turned and eyes watched me as I entered and as I cautiously stepped deeper into the room.
I should have texted and waited for Kitty. There was no doubt in my mind Kitty could have handled a place and people like this.
“Hi, honey.” A younger man with a red beard and a black bandana approached me. “You from out of town?”
“I’m looking for a friend.”
“I can be your friend.”
Oh God. I swallowed. My eyes scanned the room for Joe, but I didn’t see him anywhere.
“Um, no thank you,” I told him. “Just looking for my friend.”
“A pretty girl like you. I bet you could handle lots of friends at once,” he teased.
A few of his buddies laughed.
Just then arms grabbed my waist from behind, circling me tight. I was about to scream and fight them off, when a voice smooth like, well, coffee hit my ears. “She’s my friend, guys, back off.”
“Ah, Joe,” said Red Beard. “It’s your boss woman. Alright, man!” They all cheered and raised their beers, and then immediately left me alone. I guess Joe knew how to make friends everywhere he went. And I guess he’d also told them about me.
His arms were still around me. He brushed my hair to side, pressing his lips lightly to my skin. “I missed you so damn much, woman.” His breath was hot on my neck. It felt really, really ridiculously nice. Little shivers shot all through my body. It would have been easy to give in to him. But before I could decide whether I wanted to shove him off me or drag him into the nearest bathroom to let him do whatever he damn well pleased to me, he dropped his grip and pulled away from me.
I turned around to face him.
Oh man, he was a whole new level of sexy while intoxicated.
He had a few more days’ worth of stubble coating his jawline. His hair was perfectly disheveled. The smile on his lips could drop panties. And his eyes—there was something easy and laidback about them. Seeing him like this caused a ping of jealousy to rocket through me. I wondered what he’d been up to these last two days. Or, more accurately, who he’d been up to these last two days.
“Come and play darts with me,” he said nodding in the direction of an old dart board in the back corner of the bar.
I didn’t want to argue with him or make a big scene or lecture him about ruining his sobriety. I figured when Kitty showed she could play bad-cop. Instead, I followed him a little deeper into the bar.
Two guys were already in the middle of a game. We sat close by, watching.
“I’ve never played before,” I confessed. “But it doesn’t seem too hard.”
“I have years of practice. I’ll show you how it’s done. On my resume, I could write . . . Skills: knowledge of useless law facts, makes a mean cup of coffee, and champion of bar games.” He ticked off his skills on his fingers.
I laughed. “In that order?”
He grinned at me. “Yes, in that order.”
I’d expected to find him in a ditch somewhere, completely screwed up out of his mind, maybe throwing up. Either that, or Doug had kidnapped and killed him. About a million different scenarios, each one worse than the next, crossed my mind when Kitty called me. Happily playing darts wasn’t one of them.
“Wait, are you sober?”
I hadn’t seen him touch a drink since I’d entered the bar. Unless he was the most put-together drunk on the planet, he seemed pretty close to his normal self.
“Yes, I’m sober. Did you think I was drunk?”
“Well . . . we are in a bar, Joe.”
“Nah. I came in here with every intention of drinking after you left. But I sat down, started talking with Joe over there.” He pointed to the elderly man working behind the bar. “His name is Joe, too. Go figure. This is his bar. Anyway, he’s twenty-two years sober. Can you believe that? I find it incredible that he owns a bar and still maintains his sobriety. Still, even after hearing Joe’s story, I ordered a drink. That drink sat in front of me for like an hour, not moving. I never ended up touching it. So, that was that. I couldn’t bring myself to drink.”
I was proud he hadn’t touched the drink, but that didn’t explain his behavior. “But you’ve been missing for two days. What have you been doing if you haven’t been drinking?”
“Hanging out here with my new friends.”
He seemed fine and happy and completely over and done with me. And it hurt my heart.
“What about your job?” I asked. “I guess that meant nothing to you from the start.”
“Pretty sure I don’t have one.”
“Pretty sure you do.”
“Seriously?” He rubbed at his newly grown facial hair. It was almost long enough to fit in with this biker crowd, looking similar to how it did when I first met him. “I still have a job. After everything?”
“Yeah. You still have a job if you want it. Was I really supposed to lose you and lose you as an employee all on the same day?”
His jaw clenched and he looked down at his hands. Then after a moment, he lightly touched my knee, leaning slightly closer. His eyes met mine. They were sincere and intense as he said, “You haven’t lost me as either. I’m still right where you left me.”
Dammit.
Damn him.
Because unshed tears burned behind my eyes. It took every ounce of my strength to fight them off. And the smoky, dingy air of this place wasn’t helping, either. I think Joe noticed, despite how hard I tried to hide it from him.
“Let’s go. It’s time to go.” He stood up. “Give me one minute first.” He climbed up on his chair, standing tall. “Guys, thanks for letting me hang with you these last two days. It means everything to me.” He raised his hand as if he were raising a glass. “Cheers. I gotta go. Joe, I appreciate everything,” he said, turning his attention and sincerity to the man behind the bar.
“You’re welcome back anytime,” the man said.
“Come back and visit,” someone else shouted.
“Yes, I will be back.”
He hopped down off the chair. He took my hand, saying no more, and he led me out into the fresh evening air. The sun had just started to set in the time it had taken me to drive all the way here and find Joe. Now it was starting to get dark.
The bugs were singing in the surrounding trees. Joe held my hand tightly, lacing our fingers together, as he led me safely back across the street. I had to admit, my heart was going a little wild.
He was back to his cocky, confident, charismatic self. The Joe I’d met when he first walked into my office. And he was a hard Joe to resist. A hard Joe to stay angry with. I admired the way he’d looked his demons in the eye and, basically, told them to fuck off.
“Joe.” I tugged on his hand, getting him to slow down. We were right back to where we were on Monday. Same parking lot, nearly in the same spot. I dropped his hand so that I could fish the Post-it notes I’d brought out of my pocket. “Did you mean all these?”
Just then, Kitty pulled into the parking lot like a bat out of hell, in Abe’s truck no less. He must have let her borrow it. The moment the truck came to a full stop, she pushed open her door, walked across the gravel, and slapped Joe across the face. Hard. I gasped, not expecting it. Then she engulfed him in a giant bear hug. “I was worried sick, you asshole.”
Tears formed in his eyes while he hugged her back, though he still watched me. It was the first time I’d ever seen him get emotional. And I wasn’t sure who his tears were for—me or for Kitty. Or maybe for both of us.
Feeling a little awkward, and a little silly for getting them out in the first place, I shoved the notes back in my pocket.
“He’s not even drunk, Kitty,” I announced. “He’s perfectly sober.”
“What?” She pulled away, smacking him on the head. “Then try answering your phone, dumbass.”
“How else was I supposed to get you both here?” He smiled mischievously as if he knew all along we’d both show up. “Now, c’mon. I’ve developed a plan for how we can take down Doug. Together.”