CHAPTER 23
LANA
Kitty hadn’t left. She sat with her knees pulled up to her chest on the sidewalk in front of Abe’s truck. It was a warm night with lots of little bugs swarming the lights above.
I sat down beside her, pulling up my knees to my chest too. The white pantsuit I’d worn today was taking a beating. “I know I’m not your favorite person, but if you want to talk, I’d like to listen.”
“No offense, Lana, but I don’t.”
I sighed. “Your brother cares so much about you. I hope you realize that at least.”
“I do. It’s just . . . sometimes it’s a lot of pressure to live up to. I’m always screwing up. I don’t have a job. I live on my brother’s couch. Every boyfriend I’ve ever had has treated me like crap. It’s not easy.” She rested her head on her knees. There was a trail of ants moving past her feet that she watched.
“I think you’re more capable than you know. And if you want a job, I’m always looking for good baristas.”
She shrugged. “Maybe I’ll try that. I’ve never had a job before. I lived off my parents’ money until we had our falling out. Then I lived off boyfriends. Now I live off Joe.”
I didn’t really know what to say to make her feel better. This was why I’d never been good at making girl friends. I didn’t know how to sugarcoat. But then again, maybe what Kitty needed was the hard truth. “To me it sounds like you’re ready to make a change. What about college?”
“I dropped out.”
“Have you ever thought about going back?”
She shrugged.
“It’s getting late. The bugs are swarming. I think we all could use some rest. Abe won’t mind if you return his truck tomorrow.” I pointed to whatever was happening above our heads, one large bug in particular. “Seriously? Is that a moth?”
She laughed, standing up.
I stood with her.
For a second, I thought she might give me a hug. But she hesitated. Maybe Kitty wasn’t great at making girl friends, either. “Before we go in,” she said. “Are you going to forgive my brother for spying on you? Because you should. He was only doing it to help me.”
“I haven’t decided yet.”
“You’re here now, aren’t you? Seems like you’ve already decided.”
She left me, opening the motel room door, disappearing back inside.
I was a little slower to move. I guess she made a good point.
Back in the room, we all decided that it was too late to drive anywhere. Kitty claimed one of the beds. And I had a choice to make—sleep with Kitty or sleep with Joe.
“Alternatively, I could go ask the front desk for a rollaway cot,” I commented, knowing Kitty didn’t care. And if Joe cared, he acted like it didn’t matter. I kind of hoped it mattered, though.
“I’m going to brush my teeth.” He made eye contact before disappearing into the bathroom.
Jesus, that one little look sent my heart racing. Maybe I had already forgiven him. It sure felt like it.
“Just get in his bed, Lana,” Kitty mumbled looking half-asleep, “and cuddle your boyfriend.” She giggled to herself. “At least you get to go to New York tomorrow. I have to go meet weirdo Doug. Anything I should know about the wolf before you send me to him?”
“Yeah,” I told her. “He can be nice when he wants.” I took off my shoes and my suit jacket, lying them on the floor beside the bed. Then I climbed into the opposite bed. “Don’t fall for that. He’s only truly nice when he wants something—I learned that the hard way. He has a bit of a temper. Though, I doubt he’d ever show that side of himself in public.”
“Who you talking to?” Joe asked, coming from the bathroom. He glanced at Kitty who was now sound asleep.
“Oh.” I rolled my eyes. “Nobody, I guess.”
“You gonna wear that to bed?” He gestured to my slacks and blouse.
I shrugged. “Yes.”
“Here.” He pulled off his T-shirt and tossed it to me. “You can wear mine.”
Not that I hadn’t seen him shirtless before, but I still had to pick my mouth up off the floor. The hard lines of his stomach and chest had me feeling a little dizzy.
“I’m going to go ask the front desk for a rollaway cot. Do you want any snacks from the vending machine? Or if you’re really hungry, I could head across the street for something from Joe’s Bar.”
“Are you going to eat?”
“I already did before you showed up.”
“Okay. I’m not really hungry.”
“You sure?” He started to go.
“I’m sure. And . . . um . . . I don’t mind if-if, um.” Spit it out, Lana. “You don’t need to go get a cot.” I took a deep breath. “You can sleep with me.”
“Okay,” he said simply. He kicked off his shoes and climbed into the other side of my bed.
I had his shirt in my hands still. Awkwardly, I unbuttoned my blouse, taking it off. Then I hastily pulled his T-shirt over my head. Then I got under the covers, too.
Joe flipped off the light on his side.
He rolled over, his back to me. I laid there, still as possible, staring into the blackness above me. He’d written me that note on the hotel pad of paper, and I thought that meant something. But maybe it didn’t. Because he was completely keeping his distance. I obviously didn’t want anything physical to happen with Kitty in the room, but the cuddling she’d suggested sounded nice.
With a sigh, I rolled over in the opposite direction and pinched my eyes shut.