Chapter 25

Erik

Everything hurt as I lay in bed that morning, dipping in and out of sleep. My body was bruised from the week of torture I had endured. Hanging from the ceiling in the basement with nothing more than a little bit of water and a half a sandwich a day. My father had made his point and made it well.

I was a prisoner in my own life, owned fully by him and the Syndicate. I'd never get married and never have kids of my own. Even if he allowed me to. There was no way I would ever put someone I loved through such intense hell. Never. Not even a fucking enemy. A quick shot to the head was the worst it was going to get.

The wind blew in my bedroom around me, the windows wide open thanks to Kane caring to stop by a couple of times a day while I recovered. Without Lizzy, I'd have wasted away into nothing. The pretty girl had spent hours cleaning up my wounds and stitching up the cuts from my father and his guards laying waste to me.

And all for nothing. Thomas wasn't free. The stupid asshole thought he was, but the games were just getting started.

There were worse things than death.

I tried to open my eyes, but the force to keep them shut was almost too much. My body burned for something to take me away. Drugs. Sex. Something. Anything.

Running my hand down my chest, I cried out. Never in a million years had I thought my father capable of the abuse he'd laid against me. The bastard so far beyond vile that I struggled to want to live if it meant serving him. Had he always been that way?

It took me a little while, but I finally got my eyes opened and found some semblance of peace in the view outside my window. The snow was starting to fall. The white flurries left me open, raw. I was truly alone without an ounce of comfort available to me.

A groan ran from my sore throat as I shifted up on shaky arms. "Fuck," I mumbled and let my eyes move down my body. Dark yellow and blue bruises ran just under my skin, my arms, legs, stomach, chest... nothing was left untouched.

I forced myself out of bed and walked over to the window as my knees almost gave out on me several times. Thank God I was allowed my underwear for the week of hell. My dignity was intact, but only slightly.

"Erik?" Lizzy's voice lifted up behind me, and I turned as she pressed her hand to her mouth. "Your back looks so bad."

"It's fine." I waved her off as she started toward me. "Please. Leave me alone, okay?"

"Okay." She moved back. "We're having Thanksgiving dinner. Do you want some help getting dressed?"

"No. I have nothing to be thankful for, Lizzy." I turned back to breathe in the icy cold air outside. Death would have been a beautiful release during the hours of torture I stood against. The thoughts racing through my mind during my awake moments had destroyed me far more than anything my father could do. He could break my body, but only one person could decimate my soul. Grace.

"Your Dad said that he's not taking no for an answer to you coming to eat." She sounded so sorrowful.

"Then tell him to come get me himself. Bring his gun too because I'm tired, Lizzy." I remained looking out at the snow. The drop from my third story room was maybe just enough to stop my heart. I reached out and turned my palm to the heavens, letting the cold snow offer me comfort.

The door closed, and I sagged against the window, so damn tired.

No sooner had I made it back to the bed then my door opened again. My father closed the door behind him, walked in and sat down in a recliner by the window, crossing his hands over his stomach.

I watched him numbly, not sure who I was staring at anymore.

"I know that you hate me, and that's fine." He breathed in deeply and studied me. "You're all I have left."

"You should have killed me. This isn't going to work out well for either of us. When I gain my strength back, I will come after you while you sleep. I'll be the one above you while you take your last breath." I ground my teeth together and sat down, unable to stand any longer. "You should go get your gun now, Papa. Take me out. Get it over with."

His eyes filled with tears, as if the fucker had a soul. He glanced out toward the snow as his tears began to fall. "Terrance wanted retribution for what happened to his wife, and honestly, who could blame him. He cleared his own name in your mother's death and flew here to meet with me. I knew the price would be great, but not nearly as great as it was."

Horror lodged in my chest. "What did you do?"

He glanced over at me. "I had a choice to make. It's one you'll never have to face because I won't let you go through that kind of pain." He pointed to my chest and waved his finger around. "This shit is nothing compared to losing someone you love."

"I lost them too," I barked loudly.

"But you didn't have to choose, Erik." He reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose as a sob rose up out of him that broke me. "He wanted you both. He lost everything when I killed his wife. She was pregnant, but I had no clue, so two deaths sat on my head."

"Oh my God." I pressed my hand to my mouth. "You knew they were coming that day."

He nodded and turned his attention back to me. "I had no choice with Delaney, but with you, I couldn't let him have you. I told you to go with Nate and do that first hit. Do you remember?"

"How could I forget? I've lived with the regret of leaving the house that morning for ten years."

"And I've lived with so much more." He wiped at his face and stood. "The hit was on a Mister Carlos Vantaga. He was Terrance’s nemesis; the bastard having been a thorn in Terrance's side since they were boys. I offered Delaney and the hit."

"You sent me to kill someone that another Don couldn't get rid of while you let them come in here and take my baby sister?" Bile rose up in my throat.

His eyes darkened as he lifted his finger. "You have no fucking clue what I've been through. I saved you from being torn apart by monsters."

"So that you would have someone to keep your inheritance alive. You don't give a shit about me. You care about you. You probably killed Mom too."

He crossed the room and slapped me in the face. "You're alive because I kept you alive. Don't ever forget that."

"I wish you would have let them take me too," I mumbled and wrapped my arms around myself. I wasn't a man anymore, but a small boy trapped in a nightmare. Everything I knew to be true was a fucking lie, and the man I'd love for the entirety of my life was the devil himself.

I'd get my strength back, and then I'd kill him. I had no other choice.