Chapter 23

Nate

Not seeing Jenna all day Sunday almost killed me, but I knew she was going to spend some time with her family. I had to pray that her visit wouldn't put her in proximity with Ashley. Surely Ash wouldn't be hanging out with the Webbs after what she did to Darek. Surely not.

I slept most of the day away and woke up Monday morning on the couch, covered in sweat from a nightmare I had.

Jenna had been in my face, screaming at the top of her lungs, losing her shit. She uncovered everything and wouldn't let me explain why or how I was involved. She wouldn't hear me out.

"What the fuck do you expect, man?" I ran my hands over the top of my head and closed my eyes as I sat on the couch, leaned over, dripping sweat. "Your time is almost up with this girl. Love can't save you from what the fuck you are."

"Nate. You up, man?" Mikey. "I lost my fucking key."

"Lost it or gave it to the highest bidder?" I reached for the door and paused. Mikey didn't lose shit. Not ever. "You stop by the bakery this morning for me? I'm not letting your fat-ass in unless-"

"Blueberry, dude. They were out of your favorite." His voice was tight.

Fuck. Our code word was blueberries.

"I'm naked, man, cock hanging out and all. Let me grab my pants." I jogged to the bedroom and pulled a shirt over my head before getting my gun. I walked back toward the living room as my heart raced. Was Ashley really coming over to my place to threaten me? Fucking bitch. "I'm coming. I-"

"We're already inside, Nate." Erik stood behind Mikey, who sat in his favorite chair. The gun pointed at the back of my best friend’s head lifted and Erik motioned for me to sit down. "Have a seat. Let's chat."

"All right, man. Just let Mikey go. You know that fat fucker ain't got nothing to do with all of this."

"Naw... but it's sweet of you to suggest." He smiled, the devil's spawn standing in my goddamn living room. "He should hear this, you know, in case you need a witness."

"All right. Sure." I sat down and put my gun on the table in front of me. Getting in a quick draw fight with Erik Bertinelli was a no-win situation. There was no way I would come out on top.

"Tell me what your plans are for the Webb girl." He moved around Mikey and sat down on the other chair in the living room before leaning back. Seeing him relaxed and comfortable while pointing a gun at me had my blood boiling. Sorry piece of shit.

"Why do you care?" I crossed my arms and leaned back.

"Because she's growing on me. I kinda like her. She's got this naughty side that someone needs to-"

I came up off the couch. "You sorry fucker. You know I'm in love with her. Say one more goddamn thing and we'll both be dead on this floor."

Mikey was on his feet, and Erik stood and lifted his gun toward my face.

"In love with the girl whose brother you killed in cold blood for money? What a conundrum. Seems to be your MO, doesn't it? Hurt those closest to you."

"Is this about us, Erik? You got involved in this shit because you're still bent over by me not joining you? This has nothing to do with you. Stay the fuck out of it." I growled loudly and took a step toward him as he calmly clicked his safety off.

Mikey moved in between me and the gun, facing me. "Stop it. I care too much about you to see you get your brain splattered all over a fucking wall for a girl. Stop it."

"Move Mikey. This isn't just about Jenna. It's about my fucking freedom." I shoved my friend to the side. "Pull that trigger or get the fuck out of my house."

He moved the gun an inch to the left and pulled the trigger, hitting my ear with the bullet. I didn't flinch. It grazed me if even that. Mikey dropped to the ground, curled into a ball and started screaming like a little girl.

"Don't tell me what the fuck to do. You are nothing to me anymore, Nate."

"I was like a brother once." I reached up and wiped the blood off my ear. "Those days all long gone now? One ‘no’ and all the shit we went through is part of the past? Locked up in the space where your black heart used to beat?"

"What are you going to do with Jenna? Answer the question."

"I don't know. I'm not going to hurt her." I pulled my t-shirt up and pressed it to my ear as I ignored the stinging. "I can't hurt Ash either. She's been beside me since you walked away."

He nodded and pulled the gun down. "I like her."

"Jenna?" I tilted my head, assessing the fucker for what his definition of 'like' might be.

"Yeah. She's got spunk."

"You touch her and I'll cut your balls off. Understand me?" I narrowed my eyes. "Don't go to her again. She doesn't need you. She has me."

"She came to me, Nate." He tucked his gun in the back of his pants. "Namely because she didn't have you. She doesn't have anyone to help her out. So I decided to."

"What's she doing in return?" My stomach tightened. No fucking way he'd offered help to my girl for servicing his cock.

"Nothing that would offend or upset you." He walked toward the door. "Be prepared for what's coming your way. It's gonna get pretty fucking ugly before it gets better."

"How so?" I turned slowly, not wanting to set things off again. I'd almost forgotten that Mikey was on the ground save for the whimpering.

"She knows that you and Ash are connected."

"How is that?" I dropped down to the couch, incredibly tired all of a sudden. Money didn't mean shit to me other than its ability to save me from poverty, but I didn't need much. Wealth could suck a nut. I just wanted enough to cover the bills, drive a decent bike and take my girl out to dinner from time to time. Never had I meant to get filthy rich by taking lives and stripping away families of their inheritance. But step by step, shitty decision by shitty decision, and I was here now.

In a place where someone had to die. Jenna or Ash.

"Ashley has always been a vindictive bitch with a jealous streak that makes her unstable. She told the girl yesterday." He opened the door. "I'm going to put a hit on Ashley."

"Jenna asked you to do that?"

"Are you wanting to take me up on the offer instead?"

"To kill one of my best friends?" I snorted and covered my face as a maniacal laugh bubbled up inside of me. "Is this shit really happening? How did it get this fucked up?"

"Cause you're sloppy and you trusted the wrong people." He pulled the door open. "You want the hit, Nate? Take her out and remind yourself that some things are worth dying and killing for."

"Like what, Erik? What things, and how would an asshole like you know about them?"

"I watch movies." He smiled. "Love. If you love the girl, you'll do what's right by her."

"And kill Ash." I sat up and groaned. "Can I pay you to do it?"

"Nope. Jenna's already paying me to do it."

"With?" My tone dropped again.

"None of your business." He stepped through the door and left it open. "One of us has to take her out. Me? You? Jenna?"

"Jenna's not killing anyone. It would ruin her." I narrowed my eyes. “Erik, hear me. Don’t let my girl kill anyone. She’s a good girl. I’ll do anything to keep her that way.”

“Ahhh… the man has decided that even though he dances in the dark, he much prefers the warmth of the light?” Erik spoke to me about me, as if he were capable of being cheeky. Bastard.

“I’m serious.”

“Give me an offer I can’t refuse.”

“What do you want from me?” I tried hard not to let him see the fear racing across the center of my soul. I knew what he wanted.

“I want you. With me. In the syndicate. Make it happen, Nate.”

“I’ll think about it.” I dropped back on the couch and tried to ignore the deep laughter that resounded from the open hallway as he walked out and left me standing in a cold sweat. I was a cold-blooded killer, but the syndicate required the pledge of forever. I wasn’t sure I could go there.

"Is he gone?" Mikey sat up, his eyes wide.

"Yes, you pussy. Get up here and let's figure this out."

"Why in the world would he be willing to help you?"

"He still cares about me, man. I care about him too. Just cause I didn't sign on the dotted line for his syndicate doesn't mean all the shit we went through doesn't matter. That's why he was here. Jenna must have told him that she was going to kill Ashley. He's not going to let her take on that burden."

"Hey... Maybe..." Mikey walked to the door, peered out into the hall and closed the door quickly like something was after him.

I snorted and rolled my eyes as he walked toward the chair and dropped down into it.

"What, Mikey? Speak up. Shit." I got up and walked to the kitchen. I needed something much stronger than beer. Something like a glass of bourbon from Jenna's dad's liquor cabinet.

"Maybe if Jenna killed Ashley, and she knows that somehow Ash matters to you, the two of you will be even."

I glanced over my shoulder before opening the fridge. "That's the stupidest shit I've ever heard in my life, man. Two wrongs don't make a right."

"No? I think they might in this situation. Just think about it for a minute. You never tell her you were involved in Darek's murder."

"Cause I wasn't." I grabbed a beer from the fridge and chucked it at him before grabbing mine and popping the top.

"Yeah, you were. You gave Ashley the Zandra. You knew what she was doing with it. You planned and plotted the shit out."

I choked on the beer, spitting some of it out. "Well, fuck, Mikey. I'd almost convinced myself I was clean on this one."

"You're taking half the money, asshole."

"I was considering not taking it. It's kinda like stealing from Jenna's dad. I like the old guy." I grabbed a napkin and bent over to clean up the floor. "I'm just going to come clean with her tonight. I need her to know that I love her, Mikey. That she's the woman I'd change everything for."

"And you think she's just going to drop her panties and offer you forever after a night of fucking? You killed her brother."

I glanced up. "Stop saying that shit. I did not."

"You did." He laughed and turned to walk back to the living room. "Tell me what kind of person could hear the full story and not think that you're the villain."

"I hate you sometimes," I called after him and finished cleaning the floor.

"Listen to me, Nate. Don't tell her anything. She'll kill Ashley, and you need to mourn like crazy. Let her be the villain, man."

"You're stupid." I walked into the living room.

"Could you forgive her for killing your best friend?"

"Ashley?"

"Yes. Could you forgive Jenna for killing Ash?"

"Yeah. I'm thinking about killing her myself. Shit. Keep up here, man."

"You keep up. Make her the villain. You forgive her and what? She lives her life trying to make it up to you." He snorted. "It's genius, really."

I sat down and digested Mikey's suggestion. It was brilliant, and if nothing else, it would save me the day she found out that I had a hand in Darek's death. A small one, but a hand nevertheless.

"I'm not taking the money. I can't." I lifted my beer to my lips. "I don't want evidence that I did anything that would hurt her. I want her to be my wife one day, man."

"Good. Then stick to the plan."

"No. Go find Erik. Tell him to kill Ash for me, but not to let Jenna do it. Tell him my answer is yes."

“Fuck, that was fast. You sure about this?” Mikey got up and sighed.

“Yeah. Do it before I change my fucking mind.”

"Dude, you know I hate that guy." Mikey stalled for a minute.

"Shut the fuck up and do what I told you to. You owe me. I already took a bullet for your ass today." I reached up and wiped at my ear as I winced.

"I almost shit myself when that gun went off."

"Out. Now." I closed my eyes and sunk back into the couch. Jenna would be rattled. I needed to remind her that I wasn't the guy she might start believing me to be thanks to Ash. I was her lover, her man, her future.