CHAPTER 16
MELANIE
The next morning, I arrived at the cabin early, just as everyone was getting up. I let them get settled as I made breakfast. My phone was going off incessantly as I tried to work and Evan looked up from the table where he was buckling Hadley into her highchair. I glanced down to see that Layla had been trying to get hold of me. I knew she wanted to know what was going on with Evan and me, but I wanted to hold it close to myself for just a little bit longer.
“Everything okay?” he asked.
“Yep,” I said. “Just my friend Layla calling to chat.”
“She’s pretty persistent,” he said, as my phone went off with another text.
I laughed. “Um, yes. That is exactly the word I would use to describe her.”
Evan looked at me thoughtfully for a moment. “You know, it is Saturday and we never discussed you working weekends. Why don’t you get out of here and go meet up with your friend or whatever else you want to do? You don’t have to be here all of the time.”
I finished plating up breakfast and sat down to eat. It would be good to see Layla, and I knew she was dying to know what was happening with Evan.
“If you’re sure you don’t need me today, then I think I will do that,” I said between bites.
“We will miss you, but I know you had a life before us. Go, have fun. I can handle the kids by myself.”
We finished eating and Evan insisted on cleaning up so I could leave. I gave the kids quick kisses on the tops of their heads and waved to Evan as I headed out the door. On the drive into town, I thought back to the night we had spent together and how amazing it had been.
Evan was a patient and giving lover. Everything he had done had been to ensure my pleasure, including letting me be on top. Letting myself be intimate with a man was a huge step for me, and knowing that I was in control had made all the difference.
I was starting to feel more like the old me than I had in a while. I got to the diner to find that Layla was already inside with milkshakes waiting for us. She stood to wrap me in a hug before sitting back into her side of the booth.
“Holy shit,” she said.
“What?” I asked, looking at her.
“You did it,” she declared.
“I did what?” I asked.
“IT! You got laid!” she practically squealed.
I flapped my hand at her to quiet her before anyone else heard her and shook my head.
“What are you talking about”? I asked, trying to be coy.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about. You are glowing, Melanie. I know that glow. I’ve had that glow. You, however, have not. Not in a very long time.”
I looked down into my milkshake. When I raised my eyes to hers, I couldn’t help but smile.
“So? How was it?” she asked, leaning in to get the juicy details.
“It was really nice,” I said.
“Nice?” She looked almost disappointed. “Nice is Mr. Rogers. Nice is the captain of the debate team.”
I laughed. “Okay, okay, it wasn’t nice. It was amazing,” I said.
Layla clapped her hands and did a little dance in her seat, making me laugh out loud. I recounted the night to her, telling her how Evan had let me be in control and how that had been what had finally allowed me to let it happen.
“So, he still doesn’t know?” Layla asked when I had finished.
I shook my head. “No. I mean, how do you bring something like that up? Hey, before we get naked you should know I was kidnapped, chained up in a shed for two days and nearly raped by a crazy psychopath before I got away.”
Layla looked at me with sympathy in her eyes. “But that is what happened, Mel. And it’s kept you locked inside yourself for four damn years. I’m not saying you didn’t have the right to protect yourself like that. But if you want things to go any further with Evan – and it sounds like you do – you’re going to have to tell him at some point.”
I sighed. “I know. I guess part of me is afraid of how he will look at me after I tell him. I don’t want him to see a victim. I’m so damn tired of being the victim.”
“I get that,” Layla said. “But if he’s truly as great as you say he is, I bet he just admires you even more for being able to go on living your life after something like that.”
I nodded. I knew Layla was right. Though I didn’t know Evan all that well, I knew enough to know he was a kind and gentle man. A man who would treasure me, not harm or pity me. Still, everything was so new and I just wasn’t ready to tell him.
“Enough about me, what’s new with you?” I asked her.
Layla knew me well enough to know that I was done talking about it, so she happily changed the subject. We spent the afternoon eating burgers and fries, drinking our milkshakes, and laughing over the predicaments she got herself into with the numerous guys she went through. Part of me envied her for being able to go through guys like water. That was what twenty-three year olds were supposed to do. Another part of me, though, was glad that I had all I wanted with Evan right now.
I just hoped that I was enough for him and that he wouldn’t see me as damaged when he finally did learn my secret.