Chapter Thirteen
“You’re going where?” his sister shrieked.
“Vienna,” Colin said. “Just for a few days. I’ll be back Tuesday.” He held the phone between his ear and shoulder as he typed at his keyboard.
“When are you leaving?”
“Tomorrow.”
“But why? You’re going alone? How did this happen?” Shannon sounded ready to burst. “I have a million questions. Can you come over for dinner?”
“No, Shan, sorry. Having dinner with the kids, then leaving in the morning.” Finishing the line he’d been typing, he pushed back from his desk. “I just wanted to let you know I wouldn’t be here. And, I guess, in case something happened, someone would know where I was.”
“Why aren’t you telling anyone?”
“Because… this trip is for me.”
Shannon huffed in exasperation. “What’s going on, Colin? I’ve barely heard from you in the past month, we haven’t gotten together, it’s not like you. Talk to me.”
Colin stood and went to the window to gaze down on the scenery outside. He loved to look at the huge old oak that stood nearby. Its lush green leaves shaded half his view of the street beyond. A few were just starting to turn yellow. “When I get back, we’ll have a meal, and I’ll… catch you up.”
“Catch me up on what?” Shannon beseeched. “Give me something here!”
He winced. Shannon wasn’t just his sister, she was the best friend he had. Their birthdays were exactly one year and one week apart. Since the two oldest McKinnon siblings, Tara and Kate, were practically tied at the hip, and then Colin and Shannon were so close in age, they’d bonded early on. Throughout their lives, they were always there for each other, both in childhood and adulthood. Especially in adulthood.
When Colin needed escape from his lifeless marriage, he went to Shannon’s house for a drink or a meal. He got on well with her husband, Pete, and adored her four kids, so he went there often. When he finally got to the point of wanting to ask for a divorce, it was Shannon he’d gone to for a long talk and moral support. She’d been there for him unequivocally, every step of the way. She’d helped him find a new flat when it was time for him to move. She was the one who always checked on him, listened to him, the only person he could really be himself with. He needed to tell her.
“I met someone,” he said.
Shannon gasped. “When? How? Spill it!”
Colin let out a tiny laugh and slumped against the wall. Some of the tension seeped out of him and relief flooded in. He should have gone to Shannon sooner. Whether he liked to admit it or not, sometimes he needed someone to talk to, and she was the person he trusted most in the world. He told her about Maggie, how they’d met, the day trips with her, that an affair had started, all of it.
“Well I’ll be damned. You sound absolutely smitten,” Shannon said when he was done. “Will I get to meet her?”
“I don’t know,” he hedged. “I mean…”
“Ya ashamed o’me, lad?” Shannon joked in an exaggerated brogue.
He chuckled. “Of course not. I just… she’s going to be leaving, Shan. To introduce her to you, or even the kids… seems strange.”
“You ashamed of her, then?”
“Stop. It’s none of that. It’s just…”
“Because introducing her to the people you care most about would make it deeper, more real?”
His stomach gave a little twist. “Maybe.”
“Well, I hate to tell you, but from how you sound? It’s already deep and real.”
He sighed heavily. “Aye. For me, it is.” He’d admitted as much in his head, but it was the first time he’d admitted it out loud. It shook his insides. He drew a choppy breath. “But like I said, she’s leaving in the end of October, so anything I… feel… doesn’t matter.”
“Oh, Colin.” Shannon sighed too. “Of course it matters.”
“I’ve got to get goin’,” he said, straightening. He didn’t want to talk about it anymore. “I’ve got to finish up things here at work before I go home and pack.”
“When you get back,” Shannon said insistently, “we are meeting for lunch. So I don’t have to deal with the kids or anyone but you. Dinner, next week. Put me in your plans in ink, Col. I’ll come to your office. Ya hearin’ me?”
“Aye, I hear ya. I’ll see you then.”
“All right. Have a wonderful trip. Vienna! Good Lord, that’ll be somethin’.”
“I’m sure it will be.”
“Colin… I think it’s grand. That you’re doing things out of your comfort zone, living it up a little, and that you met someone. Even if it doesn’t last, to know you connected with someone is just…” Shannon paused. “It’s progress. You deserve to be happy. I want you happy. Enjoy it.”
He watched the sunlight play through the leaves of the oak. “Thanks, Shan.”
When the call ended, he felt better for having told his sister the truth, but also a bit on edge for having admitted to himself that he had real feelings for Maggie. She meant something to him. He’d finally found someone he cared about, he finally wasn’t numb anymore, and it would end all too soon. Because Maggie would go on traveling the world, and he was rooted here, and neither of those things would change. They were at an impasse. They had been from the minute their relationship had started.
All he could do was treasure the time they had together now. And he would.
*
Maggie loved Vienna. It was one of the most enchanting, exquisite cities she’d ever been in. But watching Colin take it all in for the first time was more rewarding and fulfilling than anything she’d done in a long time.
After their argument, she’d thought of the things she’d said to him, and his terse, cutting response. She hadn’t been wrong… and neither had he. She’d had to admit that. But all she wanted after the fight was to put the smile back on his face and the light back in his eyes. The return of his deep frown and matching scowl had cut her to the core, much more than his sharp words.
But when she’d suggested they go to Vienna, she wasn’t sure he’d go along with it. No matter how much he claimed he wanted to cut loose and catch up on long ago buried dreams, Colin reminded her of the proverbial dog whose cage door had been opened and just stared at the open door, not knowing what to do. She wanted to help lead him out of it. Their day trips were a good start, their sexy times together even better, but this would be a true leap of faith.
He’d taken it. She couldn’t have been happier for him.
Of course, he’d made a few stipulations. One, no B&Bs. He said if he was finally going to Vienna, he wanted to stay at a legendary hotel. Two, he insisted on paying for their hotel room, all five nights. Three, he would let her plan their itinerary, as long as it included visits to the Kunsthistorisches Museum, the Haus der Musik, and the Naschmarkt. She’d grudgingly acquiesced to his paying for their stay, and gladly agreed to the rest.
But she hadn’t been prepared for the breathtaking Hotel Imperial, where he booked their room. Authentic charm and luxurious beyond measure, she hadn’t stayed in a five-star hotel like this in some time. Rarely, really. It was classic Old World magnificence. The grand facade of the hotel and the lobby made her swoon with its marble, grand high arches, and art.
“I still can’t believe you did this,” she said as the concierge took Colin’s credit card.
“I splurged. I plan to enjoy it. You should too.” He leaned down to drop a quick kiss on her lips.
Their room was equally extravagant. Decorated in pale blues, bright blues, and gold, it featured the most lavish, sumptuous king-sized bed she’d ever seen. It made her suck in a breath.
He noticed her staring at the bed and murmured seductively, “Let’s have at it.”
Heat shimmered through her. God, when Colin smoldered, he did it so well. “That’s one of the most enticing beds I’ve ever seen.”
“Same.” He pushed her hair aside to nuzzle the soft spot by her ear. “But you’re even more enticing.”
Her head tipped back to give him better access, and he started nibbling on her neck. She whimpered lustfully. “If we get in there, I might never want to get out of it.”
“I hear you,” he said, “but we will. Too much in this city I’ve longed to see and do.” He grasped her waist and lowered her to the bed. “First and foremost, I’m doing you.”
She laughed and gladly gave in.
They spent their days going non-stop, hitting all the most famous attractions, and their nights in that incredible bed, reveling in each other. Vienna was such a romantic city, and she had to admit it: she found herself falling for Colin a little more with each day. Watching him light up as he saw something he’d always yearned to see; how he took in the people, food, sounds at the Naschmarkt; the way he reached for her hand to pull her closer to him in the awesome magnificence of St. Stephen’s Cathedral… his joy, the way he absorbed his surroundings, the light in his eyes, all made her heart expand and overflow with simple joy.
Though really, there was nothing simple about it.
When they’d gotten in that fight, and she’d been out of contact with him for less than two days, it had upset her more than anything had in a long time. Like being in a fight with your boyfriend, and she hadn’t had one of those in… when had she gotten so close to Colin? Without realizing it, she’d gotten used to his presence. Craved it when he wasn’t with her, bathed in it when he was with her. She’d had crushes on other men she’d met, even ones she’d had brief flings with. But nothing like this. What she felt for Colin was real.
As much as it delighted her, the thrill of these building emotions also made her uneasy. She wrestled with these unexpected and unasked for feelings. When she got involved with this fling with Colin, that was all it was supposed to be, a fling. She hadn’t been looking to fall for another man. She’d thought herself incapable of it. How many men had she met since losing her husband? She couldn’t even count, and not one of them had evoked a deep response. Some of them elicited pure lust, sure. The geniality of friendship and admiration, definitely. But real, genuine feelings? A profound level of affection and connection? No. Not one, never, not since Zack.
And here she was… beyond her control, falling for this steady, reserved, deeply good and appealing man. She didn’t know what to do with it. It felt wonderful, it felt like she was soaring—and it scared the crap out of her. She wanted both to revel in these new, unchartered waters… and swim away, back to dry land, to save herself.
On Monday morning, their last full day in Vienna, she was awakened by the ringing of Colin’s cell phone on the night stand. He rolled away from her to answer it, and she almost fell back to sleep… until she heard him say, “Thank you, sweet girl. You’re a love to remember. Yes, forty-one now… aye, ancient… ha ha ha, very funny, Roisin. I’ll thrash you at dinner on Wednesday… Ha! You’re a fresh brat. Good thing I love ya more than life itself.”
Maggie waited for him to finish talking to his daughter. The second he clicked off the call and set the phone down, she asked, “Is it your birthday today?”
“Aye,” he said, reaching for her. “Let’s go back to sleep.” He tucked his arms around her and nudged her head back to his chest.
“Colin!” Maggie pushed back enough to look into his eyes. “Why didn’t you mention it?”
He shrugged and said nonchalantly, “’Cos it’s not a big deal.”
“I… I would’ve done something if I’d known!” She felt awful. “I would’ve—”
“You did do something,” he said. “You brought me to Vienna.”
“But that wasn’t—I didn’t—” She shook her head. “I wish I’d known.” Gripping his chin, she kissed him long and hard. “Happy Birthday, mister,” she said warmly.
He smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “Thank you.”
“I’ll make sure today is memorable,” she promised.
“It will be,” he murmured, tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear. “I’m in Vienna with you. Don’t need anythin’ more than that.”
His heartfelt words and the soft look in his eyes made her insides quiver. There was no mistaking the adoration there. A shiver skittered over her skin.
She willfully shook it off. “So you’re a Virgo. I should’ve known.”
Rolling his eyes, he said dryly, “Don’t tell me you give that nonsense any credence whatsoever.”
“Said the Virgo poster child.”
He snorted, then kissed her sweetly. “Are we going back to sleep?”
“No. I have to start off your birthday properly,” she said, and started kissing her way down the length of his naked body.
*
The day had been incredible. Easily the best birthday Colin could remember enjoying, ever. He and Maggie had started the day with a wild romp in bed, then had a decadent breakfast at a lovely restaurant in the MuseumsQuartier. From there, they’d gone to the Leopold Museum for a few hours, had lunch there, then went to the State Opera House and caught a short concert, as they’d planned. A late dinner with good whiskey, a last stroll along the magnificent city’s streets, arm in arm… by the time they got back to their room, Colin was ready to pass out, both from exhaustion and sheer happiness.
“Shall I strip for you?” Maggie asked with a mixture of mischief and sexy.
A rush of lust zipped through him. Forget passing out. “You mean, while I just sit and watch?”
“Of course, birthday boy.”
“Then hell yes.” He sat on the edge of the bed and toed off his shoes.
“And you don’t undress yourself,” she instructed as she pulled off her socks. “I get to do that.”
“This is sounding better and better.”
His hands flattened on the mattress as he watched her remove each item of clothing. Smiling at him, playing it up for him, she was a first class siren. First she pulled the red top over her head, letting it drop to the floor, revealing… sweet Jesus, he hadn’t seen this bra before. Red lace. His mouth watered. “Is that new?” he asked, his voice suddenly hoarse.
“Mm hmmm.” She smiled as she removed the pocketknife from her jeans pocket and placed it on the nearby table, then shimmied out of her skinny jeans to reveal a matching red lace thong. She gave a little twirl to show him the full view.
His mouth dropped open. Blood surged to his groin. He felt dizzy.
“I got these special for our last night in Vienna.” She pulled the elastic out of her hair, letting the long gold fall loosely all around her. “I was so happy you agreed to come on this trip. That you took a leap and did something for yourself. That you finally got to see a place you always dreamed of. So I wanted to make tonight special.”
She moved to stand before him, moving in between his legs. His eyes were level with her cleavage and he kissed it. Smiling down at him, her hands cupped his face. “But if I’d known it was your birthday too? I would’ve done something even more. I tried to make everything great today, but hope this will suffice as a present.”
Her fingers undid the buttons of his pale blue shirt as his hands drifted over her body. Her skin was like velvet, warm and unbelievably soft. His greedy hands ran up and down her legs, her sides, up her back, reaching to caress her lace-encased breasts before gliding back down to her hips and around to grasp the globes of her arse and squeeze. “You’re magnificent,” he breathed. “Do I get to unwrap my present now?”
She pushed his shirt off over his shoulders. “Nope, not yet. You’re still wearing clothes, and that’s for me to do…”
Gently she nudged him to lie back on the mattress. His erection strained through the cotton and denim as she undid his jeans, as she eased the zipper down, as he lifted his hips so she could pull them and his boxer briefs down and off him. His heart rate climbed with every breath, every touch. Every nerve in his body was tingling, lit up and white hot.
She climbed on and straddled his lap, grinding into him before lowering herself down to kiss him. Their lips fused, his hands skimmed down her back, and his eyes slipped closed in bliss. She tasted of whiskey and the sweetness that was all her. He wanted to drown in her.
He wanted to savor every moment of tonight’s union. It felt momentous; something told him he’d remember it for the rest of his life.
His fingers sifted through the long, silky curtain of her hair as it fell around them. Their tongues swirled as his mouth consumed and possessed her. The kisses burned hot and deliciously slow… he wanted to take it slow for once.
She tried to quicken the pace, but he flipped her onto her back. Her eyes widened and a surprised laugh flew out of her. “You’re a ninja.”
“Aye, McNinja, that’s me.” His hands ran over the red lace. “Stunning,” he murmured, fondling both breasts before reaching around to unhook the bra. “But that’s even better…” He lowered his head to lick, kiss, suck on one nipple as she arched and twisted beneath him, then lavished the same attention on the other. Her pale skin flushed from his ministrations and she raised her hips, greedily grinding against him.
But he made her wait. He kissed and caressed every inch of her luscious body, taking his time, memorizing every inch of her until she was panting with unrestrained lust. When he finally pulled the lacy thong off, she moaned with relief. “I need you inside me,” she demanded.
“Not yet.” He trailed openmouthed kisses along her thighs. “What’s the rush?”
“I’m going to explode if you’re not inside me, that’s what,” she said.
“No you’re not…” His fingertips feathered over her mound and she almost arched right off the bed. “Mmmm. You do want it.”
“Yessss. God, yes. Take me, dammit.”
He nuzzled the pale curls, blew a warm breath over her center, and was rewarded with a throaty moan. “Well… tonight, I want it nice and slow.”
Her head lifted so she could meet his eyes. “Why?”
“Because I want to savor you.” He spread her thighs further apart and gave her already wet folds a long, thorough lick. She gasped and her head fell back again. Her fingers twisted in his hair.
“Whatever you want,” she said eagerly. “Whatever you—ohhhh… just like that, Colin. Oh God, don’t stop…”
He took her up, level by heady level, until she was feverish and writhing beneath him. Then he reached for the condoms, rolled one over his rock hard erection, and positioned himself between her thighs. Gazing down at her, he kissed her deeply, sumptuous and hot, before stroking her face. “Maggie,” he whispered. “Maggie, I…”
She looked into his eyes and their gazes locked. Something quiet and profound passed between them, a moment of magic. It made his breath catch and his heart skip a beat. Then he gripped her hips and slid into her, slow and easy. His eyes fluttered closed for a few seconds; the feel of being inside her always made him groan as his mind spiraled out. Then he pinned her with his gaze, holding her close as he moved, thrusting in and out with slow deliberation. She clung to him, wrapping her arms and legs around him. Her eyes never left his.
“Keep with me,” he whispered. “Keep looking at me, love.” He shifted a bit, pushing even deeper, bringing a low cry from her parted lips.
They rocked together, kissing and stroking as the delicious friction built and burned, until their rhythm turned primal and swept through them like wildfire. Lost to that rhythm, his mind went blank as his body took over. His thrusts went harder, faster, and she urged him on with her greedy hands and moans until they were both mindless, lost to sensation, clinging to each other as their bodies rocked urgently.
She came with a shout, her short nails digging into his back. Watching her, feeling her melt and shatter beneath him tore the last of his restraint away. His hips pumped frantically until his body tensed and his orgasm hit hard, sending him flying over the edge into throbbing, sweet release.
He stared down at Maggie, who was panting as hard as he was. Her eyes locked on his again, round with wonder. “That was incredible,” she managed to whisper.
Kissing her over and over was all he could do. He wasn’t ready to speak, and didn’t know if he could. Still trembling, he withdrew carefully and rolled to his side, pulling her along with him. He spooned her, pressing his front to her back as he cradled her. Both of their bodies quivered, little delicious aftershocks rumbling through them as they caught their breath. Elation and amazement washed warmly throughout his core.
He’d never made love like that in his entire life.
It wasn’t just that this was a different pace than their usual fast, hard, and hot trysts. Yes, this had been deliciously slow, achingly deliberate, but it was so much more. It was special. A raw, real, deeper connection had seared them, bonded them… truly making love, in every sense of the term. A recognition of body, mind, and soul.
Moved beyond words, trying to absorb it, Colin drew a long, shuddering breath. He dropped a kiss on her shoulder, banded his arms tighter around her, and his eyes slipped closed as he tried to get a handle on the emotions swirling through him. He’d been thrown into the stratosphere. The feelings were massive, a tsunami threatening to overtake him. Yet at the same time, he felt exhilarated. Free. It was so damn good to feel, much less like this. He hadn’t thought he ever would. It was the damnedest thing.
Maggie found the hand he’d wrapped around her breast and interlaced their fingers. In the darkness, her voice was drowsy, sated as she said, “Happy birthday.”
“Best one ever, thanks to you.” He couldn’t hold back. He had to tell her what he’d just realized. He could do it here in the dark, not looking into her eyes. He swallowed hard, kissed the back of her neck, and whispered, “I love you.”
She stiffened in his arms, going still.
“Shhhh.” He caressed her arm. “You don’t have to say anything. I’m not expecting anything.” His hands ran over her skin, which was suddenly prickly with goose bumps. Nerves flared inside, but he was oddly calm. “I just had to tell you. I just wanted you to know that I’m in love with you.” Saying it once made him want to say it again. “I love you, Maggie.”
He could feel more goose bumps rise on her flesh. He stroked the curve of her neck and felt her pulse pounding beneath his fingertips. Aye, she was freaking out. Nothing to be done about that, he supposed.
“Let’s get some sleep,” he said. “Flight back tomorrow and all.” His hands glided over her arm, her side, her back. She let him, she nodded in response to his suggestion, but she didn’t say a word or move.
Finally he whispered, “Thanks again for a perfect birthday. Good night.”
She’d gone utterly still. His hands continued caressing her for a few minutes before stopping. One stilled on her hip, the other dropped by her head, in her hair. Closing his eyes, he tried to will himself to sleep.
Of course he didn’t fall asleep right away, his monumental feelings and confession swirling in his brain. He worried that what he’d confessed would drive her away… but it was out there now, and he couldn’t take it back. He wouldn’t anyway. It was his truth. He was in love with her. Whatever happened now, he’d deal with it. He’d dealt with plenty else, he could handle this too.